Janelle vs. Kaysar" - August 18
Remember that plan that the house had to backdoor James? Remember how he was
supposed to be a non-issue three weeks ago? Well, if it was any other house,
with an average IQ of about 156, then that would be the case. But as is the case
with previous seasons, we have a house full of morons. Instead of going through
the plan, Rachel won the power of veto and took herself off the block, only for
Jennifer to send Kaysar BACK into danger's eye.
Tonight is night 47 in the house o'love, and Julie is going to give us yet
another secret... this week will be a double-elimination week. Now I was at
Disneyland while this was airing in the East Coast, so I have to thank Quisla
(my sister) and the fine folks at Fans of Reality TV for filling in the gaps while I was away. Basic premise, we vote
someone out, then HOH competition, then another nomination, and then two days
from now, another live eviction... or tape delay, I don't really know for sure.
Let's go back through the week, though, as Kaysar has lost all respect for
Jennifer and the way she plays the game. James, thinking that he was going to be
rodded this week, is mentally giving the old
Salute (see "Whew!", 1979). Meanwhile, the Friendship said that Jennifer did the
right thing putting Kaysar back on the block. Immediately, he confronts Jennifer
on her lies, while she has nothing much to say other than "you won't believe
anything I say from now on." ... Yeah. That's about right.
April's defense of Jennifer's action? "All of their side is to blame". And
how? Well, let's examine the next X-factor, Howie, who points out that April
never won an eve, and her possibility of winning half a mill has gone the way of
the dodo bird, the 3DO, and the Donny Osmond version of "Pyramid". Her response?
"I don't care, put me up!" Howie replies by promising that she'll be stuck with
him either in the BB House or the Jury House (yeah, remember that? About that
time, isn't it?). April remains defiant. Howie throws down the gauntlet, saying
that if they play dirty, he'll play dirty, and then something about a hurricane,
which in the context given, is probably piss poor. April calls him an "idiot,"
and Janelle, quick to Howie's side, says that "at least he doesn't look like a
liar". Howie puts up his own battle, challenging April to just win once. And as
usual, she doesn't care.
You can tell she's only in it for the chicken, can't you? UNTIL you bring the
husband and the dog into the fray. Now it's all 'bout business. April calls the
low blow sad and then prays on the toilet. Well, at least she isn't praying to
the porcelain throne.
Then Rachel calls Janelle "beautiful" (*ding!*) and Maggie "a bitch"
(*ding!*), all in a piece entitled "When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong." Janelle
sees no more need to be nice to "them", as she says that Jennifer looks like "a
clown" (*ding!*), to which Jen replies, "I don't care what you think, Janelle."
April then calls Janelle "drunk" (*STRIKE*), and Janelle calls April "a
gold-digging bitch" (*ding!*). April thinks that Janelle knows she's a slut...
Well, if you look at the intro piece with Janelle serving cocktails in a
negligee of some sort...
Meanwhile, Janelle calls Beau a "whore whore whore" (*STRIKE*), Beau says
that Janelle has "polyester hair" (jury's still out on that one), and Janelle
says that Beau dates older men. Ivette listens and assesses that Beau gets wild
when he has teh drinks, and that Janelle is walking the diva's walk. "They're
pretty much telling the truth about each other, but no drunk wants to hear the
truth about themselves."
While we're at it, Gordon (my partner-in-crime) needs to stop calling me at
odd hours of the morning, the ER needs to stop calling me every 10 seconds, and
Kathleen (my significant other) just needs to start calling me.
Anyway, back to this round of "To Tell the Truth". Janelle & Beau's little
rivalry evolves into a screaming fit that eventually gets broken up by Kaysar
and Howie. Beau ends it with "You polyester hair bitch!" That's one for the
quote file... Howie tells Janelle she did a good job. Of what? I'll let Ivette
explain to Beau on that one. Turns out that he just made himself a target.
Meanwhile, Howie & Janelle talk to April, who is now being called "Busto" for
being a "busted blonde". Does anyone know what language these people are
speaking, because I DON'T KNOW! Anywho, after Howie goes on about April not
being able to compete without her smokes, April goes on about Howie not being
able to compete without his fingers (he's missing a pinky). And the April
love-fest continues as he mocks her in the Diary Room... and her little dog,
Let's talk with the current HOH. Why did Jennifer go back on her word with
Kaysar? She wanted the deal to be off when they didn't let go of their buttons
immediately. Nice save... except that it isn't. She says that putting up Kaysar
is a good decision albeit one that shocked her. Julie, who displays why she got
the job at the Early Show, presses Jennifer about lying in the house. She never
ruled it out, and she points out that it doesn't say in the rule book that you
can't lie. That and she wanted to step it up a notch.
Now it's eviction time... Kaysar, once again standing (what is with this guy
and standing?), thanks America for putting him back in the house and apologizes
for what happened this week, what happened with the HOH, potentially getting
kicked out, and oh, let's just throw in the entire relationship up to this
point. Janelle thanks her friends and family for watching, and then points out
that she has not lied or deceived anyone in this game. "Look where it's gotten
me once again. However, if I leave this house tonight, I leave with a clear
conscience, and to me that's worth way more than $500,000."
Now to the results...
"By a unanimous vote... Kaysar, you are evicted from the Big Brother House."
Again?! Well, to say that I'm surprised would be... a lie. So why is Kaysar back
at Home Base? "I trusted the untrustworthy." Not more need be said. You made the
same mistake that got you kicked out in the first place, only this time, there's
no going back.
HOH Competition: Face the Facts
Each player will be asked questions about past competitions. Answers will
either be Eric, Ashlea, Michael, Sarah, or none. Wrong answer is a "buh-bye".
Last one standing wins HOH.
1) Which evicted houseguest won the "Sold Out" competition to watch the
film "Four Brothers"? Correct: Sarah. All in with the right answer.
2) In the veto competition "High & Dry", which houseguest finished in
second place? Correct: Michael. All right again.
3) In the food competition "Snack Shack From Hell", which houseguest ate
the snails and noodles? Correct: None. Maggie eliminated.
4) In the food competition "Will Spell For Food" who passed on the word
jalapeno? Correct: Sarah. All right.
5) After the HOH competition "Majority Rules" which houseguest handed
over the HOH key to Kaysar? Correct: Eric. All right again.
6) In the veto competition "Rectangle" which evicted houseguest untangled
the orange rope? Correct: Ashlea. Both Howie & Ivette are eliminated.
7) Which evicted houseguest misspelled two words in the food competition
"Will Spell For Food?" Correct: None. James (who answered Sarah, thus
proving that he doesn't know JACK about his girlfriend) and Rachel are
eliminated, leaving Beau, Janelle, and April. So let's play... SUDDEN DEATH!
How many lightbulbs did it take to spell "Sold out" in the luxury
competition? Beau has 175. Janelle has 275. April has 145. Actual retail
price... 286. Janelle is the new HOH!
That power comes with perks for about, oh, all of 48 hours, because, along
with being able to flip off any houseguest of her choosing, Janelle must
nominate two people for eviction... right now. The houseguests get the news
while Janelle is nominating. Howie can't contain his excitement, so James, which
we surprisingly didn't hear much of this episode, contains it for him. Janelle
returns to the living room with her decision...
End result, the "bitch" and the "clown" are now on the block. Meaning that
Saturday night, Jennifer or Maggie will be heading to the jury house. Unless
there's a veto employed. Then it's anyone's guess. Hurry-up offense starts next