Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and we're having a
killer summer. In fact, you can say that after the finale of Whodunnit that I
wanted to strangle the producers and their crew.
Chico: This is Chico Alexander here, and it seemed like death was in vogue over
the summer, with this week having it come to a frothy head.
Chico: And frankly, some stuff made Gordon want to kill.
Gordon: (brandishes knives)
Gordon: But like all good mysteries, we'll get to the bottom of this, as from
somewhere in Rue Manor, this week's episode of WLTI...is...on!
Chico: And we begin with...
(cues NBC Mystery Movie theme)
Chico: It's all coming to a heady metaclimax.
Gordon: Milena is NOT the killer, because it's really hard to self-garrote
yourself. This happens in the trophy room that the contestants find themselves
in. One more puzzle later and Lindsey winds up with an arrow in her throat, Cris
winds up being taken away into a polics car as the killer, and Kam winds up
winning $250,000 as he high-fives a bunch of dead game show zombies, who do a
conga line going down the stairs.
Chico: This is where all the meta comes to a head.
Gordon: It does, and now I have 2 MAJOR issues with said meta.
Chico: Where we have... zombies. And in the end, it's a TV show and they're all
huggy huggy (except maybe Sasha, but that's just me).
Gordon: You can say Sasha gave the cold shoulder.
Chico: Groan. Now Gordon has some issues, and we said that if he had issues, we
would grant him time to address the issues. So Gordon... It's all yours.
Gordon: Issue #1 - lets go to episode #3, where we have the kill on Ulysses. We
revisit it on the end of episode 9, where we see the killer on a dark brown
horse. And now going back to that episode, let's see what colored horse Cris is
riding. A WHITE horse ...now does that look like a dark brown horse to you?
Chico: That is NOT a dark brown horse. To which we say... REALLY, Continuity
Gordon: If the audience is playing along at home, that sort of continuity DOES
matter. And someone who does the work on the CSI series ought to know better. So
that's issue #1. Issue #2 - and for me, this is the bigger one - There were two
riddle challenges where solving the riddle was tantamount to the team's
existence of the game. Because the other team didn't solve it, it lead to the
demise of Dana, Sasha, Geno, Ronnie and Milena. The person who solved the
riddles? Cris. As a matter of fact, the producers TOLD her to stop solving
puzzles after she solved the 2 that led to the end of the opposing team - oh and
yes, the production crew, in a post-series interview did admit they never put in
any clues as to who the killer was or do their homework on the colored horse.
Grumble. So the one plant in the game was the determinant of who won the game.
Chico: Again, keep in mind that the Killer is NEVER in on her plan.
Gordon: It doesn't matter. How do we know that because she would have been found
out should her team be decimated, that she didn't get some 'hints' from the
Chico: We don't.
Gordon: The killer should have NO say or interaction about how the game is
played or should be won. OR if she does, there needs to be incentive to do so.
Chico: My guess if she was paid a hefty amount to play the Killer. Much like,
say, "The Mole".
Gordon: But the mole has an incentive to keep the money out of the pot. What
incentive does the killer have?
Gordon: Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed this - but there needs to be #1.
Motivation as to why and #2. The last puzzle at the end game must have some sort
of clues for the winner to correctly guess who the killer is. Kam wins despite
being completely wrong about the killer the whole time, while Lindsey, who
nailed the killer in week #1, loses.
Chico: And anyone who's followed us for any breadth of time knows that if
three's one thing that Gordon hates, Is if someone does everything they can to
win and still loses
Gordon: Right. So there needed to be a final game as to determine who the killer
is. All of these things need to be cleaned up in the second season - if there is
Chico: But other than that...what did you think of the ending?
Gordon: The series was very good. The last episode needs work. And the
contestants need to up their game if they want to beat up on Mark LaBett
Chico: On the Chase, the runners lose one of their own early on, leaving a
former "Winning Lines" champion and another player against the Beast for the
Final Chase. Together, David Wilson and his friend hang 15 on the Chaser... so
what does Mark do? Hang 15 of his own. IN A ROW.
Gordon: That would be very bad for the final 2 players. They only get 15 right
and the chaser catches them with 51 seconds left on the clock. Mark is now 3-1
on the show. Thoughts?
Chico: This was one of the later episodes in the run, so you can tell that the
Chaser is getting on his game, and as good as the runners are going to get, and
they are getting better as the show moves on, so is the Beast.
Gordon: He's going to be very tough to stop.
Chico: True. Quick plug for the Chase-Cast at CLW83.com Gordon, if you have a
free Tuesday. Tee hee.
Gordon: I will after this week. Shall we do the quick AGT rundown?
Chico: Yes we shall.
Gordon: And here we go...Virginia State University Gospel Choir (Choir): Took a
perfect song (Like a Prayer) and did NOTHING with it.
Chico: Could've been done really well. They could've taken us ALL to church.
Gordon: Instead, they were taken back to school. Melody Caballero
Chico: I would've rather seen an injured Rong Liu.
Gordon: Dave Fenley (Sings 'Trouble' by Ray LaMontagne): He was good, but not as
strong as I thought he would be.
Chico: He was good, but here's the thing... Ray LaMontaigne's Trouble is the
go-to for HGWGs (Hot Guys With Guitars). He needed to do something to stand out.
Gordon: He better do that in the next round. 2Unique (Kiddie Rappers): The kids
will like them. Everyone else? Meh.
Chico: Exactly. They're Kidz Bop friendly.
Gordon: Sam Johnson (Pole Swayer): I think people need to have a blueprint of
what they are going to do to raise the bar on their act. Sam Johnson lowered it
and saw it rotate.
Chico: He didn't raise the bar so to speak.
Gordon: Duo Resonance (Gymnast Act): They were in the wrong week, where you had
too many good dancers that exposed their slow, plodding style.
Chico: Yep. Put them in a singer-heavy field, some singer is going to go home
crying. They're good, but they are up against better.
Gordon: D'Angelo and Amanda (Miami All-Stars Kiddie Dancers): For me, this was
the best act of the night. I loved the music, the atmosphere, and most
importantly, the dance moves.
Chico: They better send a fruit basket to Heidi Klum for putting them through to
the semis. Honestly, I didn't know a couple of kids could paso doble like that.
Gordon: Selena McKenzie Gordon (Child Singer): What hurts the most is that she
got nailed with the nerves. John Wing (Comedian): In my mind, he's the best
comic still in the competition. It's good adult humor without having to be blue
Chico: Agreed. And his routine (teachers and children) is relatable to his
Gordon: Exactly. Sprice (Rube Goldberg creator): Needed showmanship and more of
a sense of panache.
Chico: Still better than the Kinetic King.
Gordon: Ruby and Jonas (Kid Dancers): They advance if not for D'Angelo and
Chico: Yup. They were just ... how you say... walloped.
Gordon: Walloped sounds good. Finally...Catapult. Ok, we know the schmaltz is
good and gets votes, but I preferred their first act. It felt too Silhouetteish
to me. They have to raise their game in the next round.
Chico: If you ask me, this was the act of the night. Safe to say that Catapult
make it to the finals, yeah?
Gordon: I think so, but we still have the semifinals to get to. And who do we
have next week?
Chico: We have...Innovative Force... Forte... KriStef Brothers... Angela
Hoover... Cami Bradley... Collins Key... Taylor williamson... Jonathan Allen....
and four wild cards acts, two of them being Duo Resonance... and for some
reason... Mr. B-Double O-T-Y himself, TONE THE CHIEFROCCA!
Gordon: Ok the WIld Card acts have no chance. Im going to call it now for Cami,
Collins, Jonathan Allen and Forte.
Chico: I will go with Collins, Forte, Cami... and I say KriStef Brothers. No way
do two popera acts advance.
Gordon: It could be. We'll find out next week. Meanwhile, last week, there was a
new show that debuted that we need to review called Cutthroat Kitchen.
Chico: Anyway, you remember Chopped? You remember Iron Chef? You remember
Gordon: I do actually.
Chico: Well SO DO I! You've seen this show, you've seen 'em all.
Gordon: So let me guess - we have 4 contestants who we eliminate one by one
doing special themes until we have a winner?
Chico: The only difference? Michael Davies foot the bill for this one.
Gordon: Well there's another difference that's big. The players start with
Chico: The four chefs in this case get $25,000 each to spend as they wish, be it
to help themselves or to hurt their competitors.
Gordon: If you win the competition, you also win whatever is left. I like the
idea. I was disappointed in the execution.
Chico: We know this because it's been done about a zillion times on this
network. The bad... aside from execution... Who is this host and what has he
done with Alton Brown?
Gordon: Alton needs to not sleepwalk through this.
Chico: Must be his evil twin, which was an actual plotline in an ep of Good
Eats. But yeah, what's our favorite food geek doing in a show like this?
Gordon: Well the evil twin needs to find another show. I do like this quirky
show, but the real sabotage is why it feels like every other cooking elimination
show on The Food Network. C+
Chico: Agreed. There's no real reason why this show should've been made. After
all, we know the other three bigs on this network will RUN IN PERPETUITY. D+
Chico: It didn't need to be made
Gordon: What about the new season of Let's Make a Deal?
Chico: That always needs to be made and made long.
Gordon: Let's ask 5 good questions about it, shall we?
Chico: Let's do it.
Chico: Kick it off, G.
Gordon: First one:
1) We've seen Wayne, Tiffany, Jonathan and Kat play
nice in the sandbox. Do you think there will be any changes in personnel?
Chico: Nope. I think they have a good solid core to work with. No need to change
Gordon: I agree. If it's ot broken, don't fix it. Next one?
Chico: Next one...
2) Do we see a return of the Super Deal?
Gordon: Of course we do. It's good for ratings.
Chico: Very good. And it has been. We'll get to that. #3?
3) You are the producer. Give me a good Zonk to add
up in there.
Chico: A compact car! As in ... really compact.
Gordon: I'd like to see a Water Bed that goes along eith the Pool Table.
Chico: Of course, if you have a better idea, you can send it to cbs.com/zonk
4) Wayne is
finally coming along as the Big Dealer. Will Emmy give him the business this
Gordon: I think they should. If he does what Drew did this past season, I think
Chico: And finally...
5) This season, Let's Make A Deal attracted 3
million viewers, a rise over last year. This season, what rating is inside the
Gordon: 3.2. I think it keeps rising.
Chico: I'll go with 3.3 million. I think we want to see what the baby Coyne
looks like. Tee hee.
Gordon: Awww. Finally in our last segment in news, I had the opportunity to
watch the tapings for Millionaire this week.
Chico: The floor is yours
Gordon: I have a few things to report on. Things that I am allowed to say (Vs.
other people who spoil before the releases. Not mentioning names.) Big Board
Who Wants to See Some Millionaire?
- Nothing new on the format, music gameplay...
- Cedric = GOOD
- Different audience
- Very special episodes
- More ways to get on the show
Gordon: The Subject: Who Wants to See Some
Millionaire? Now there were a few of our own there playing the first few weeks,
which is why I was there. And here's what I can tell you. #1. Nothing new on the
format, music, gameplay, etc. It's the same Millionaire as you know it. No
Chico: Well.. one change. But we'll get to that.
Gordon: #2. Cedric is surprisingly good. You know he is going to be
entertaining, but he puts in a new dimension on the show that Meredith didn't
provide. He is also a bit off-color; there are things that unfortunately are
going to end up on the cutting room floor that I think shouldn't.
Chico: Or at least on YouTube. At least that's where the good bits on the Feud
Gordon: #3. The new change of venue means a different audience. You're not
getting the same '42nd Street Tourists' that would be more up on the world
events. You're getting the local Harlem residents that would be more up on the
entertainment and current pop culture news. This is a KEY thing to remember when
you are playing as a contestant. There were a lot of groans in the audience when
people were clearly not using the Ask The Audience lifeline correctly.
Chico: They shoot the show over at 106 & Park.
Gordon: Right. I am NOT saying that Harlem is dumber than Times Square. I AM
saying that the knowledge bases are different - they are more into pop culture
and Americana, so that's what you need to ask them.
Chico: Because they STREET! =p
Gordon: #4. Expect to see some quasi-celebrities. I'm not going to say who, but
the door is open a little wider now than in the past.
Chico: You mean some "very special episodes"?
Gordon: Yes - and civilians,
Gordon: Who you would know as quasi-celebrities.
Chico: Well, we would know them as game show all-stars.
Gordon: I mean people who you may have seen in the news or in the media who are
famous enough to get there but not famous enough to be considered a celebrity.
Gordon: Finally...#5. Whereas the show hasn't changed, there ARE more ways to
get on the show. All audience members get a shot to audition, and you can also
get on via electronically, which we'll explain later on in the show.
Gordon: Now what changes did you have?
Chico: Just the change of venue and a bit of a spoiler. Watch the first week of
shows. There's an interesting story behind one of the contestants. More on that
when the show airs.
Gordon: Oh yes. But I'm not saying a word.
Chico: Neither am I. And neither are you, Eve.
Gordon: Neither are the hamsters. Because Eve spiked their food with Alum.
Chico: Eve: *hiss*
Gordon: The hammies are quite mute, so I'll have to say it. Roll That Beautiful
Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to
your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper,
Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)
Chico: Thanks, Doug. First up... I'm going to need the brand new freshie freshie
Gordon: (Rolls over bats)
Chico: Because we have fresh renewals.
both Hollywood Game Night (hooray) and Deal With It (... yay?!)
Gordon: Would you rather see a telenovela?
Chico: Let me think about that.. *obvious fake slap to Gordon* ... Yeah, no.
Gordon: So then be happy with what you got. And be happy with this Datebook.
Chef Roulette. Coming sometime this season.
Chico: Supposedly. Food has yet to release a date for that. And if we're lucky,
Gordon: But if you're lucky, you'll get Fully Loaded - and a Millionaire.
Chico: Okay, G. What've you got for me.
a media ap where you can Challenge Cedric the Entertainer. If you beat him, you
can win a shot of getting on the show.
Chico: I assume it's available in the App Store and on Google Play
Gordon: You assume correctly. That would be a very smart thing to do.
Chico: Yep. I got some dumb things to do. Can I?
YOU Smarter than... Omar Gooding? The former Wild & Crazy Kids cohost (and yes,
Cuba's little brother) gets a visit from those three bad letters... DUI.
Chico: Ironic, because he was on a show called "Smart Guy" as well.
Gordon: Not too smart
Chico: Kids... Drinking and driving... and texting and driving... BAD.
Gordon: Very bad. But drinking Haterade is sometimes good for you
Chico: Even if it is sour at times.
there's been hardcore drug use by Lamar Odom that threatens the sanctity of
marriage between him and Khloe Kardashian. Ouch.
Gordon: They need to take a vacation. Where are they going?
Chico: Do I get the choice of place?
Gordon: Yes you do. And the Bermuda Triangle is not an option.
Chico: Aw. Back to the UK...
will.i.am, who bows out of the running on AI, will return for season 3 of The
Gordon: Good move. He's very good on the show
Chico: Sir Tom Jones, also returning. Jessie J and Danny O'Donoghue... not so
Gordon: Aw They need more ho employment
Chico: So much for the man who can't be moved. Ba DUM bum (Luda)
this week's Media Ho Report, Randy Jackson may replace Jimmy Iovine, Vin Scully
des 65 years with the Dodgers, ABC FINALLY settles the Glass House mess with
CBS...Dave Salmoni plays detective, Michael Ian Black plays a new uncle on FOX,
The Style of Rock cast is announced...Paula Deen reaches a settlement, Kelly
Clarkson says she's not preggo and Eva Longoria and Ready For Love bachelor
Ernesto Arguello apparently aren't Ready for Love
Chico: This is what happens when you ... defecate where you masticate.
Gordon: So now Shandi and Eva are BOTH available, Chico. Go get em, Tiger!
Chico: I'd rather see who this week's Ho of the Week is.
Gordon: Its hoes, and they are the following: Kat Edorssen. Hayden Moss, Gervase
Peterson, Tina Wesson, Aras Baskauskas, Rupert Boneham, Monica Culpepper, Colton
Cumbie, Tyson Apostol, Candice Woodcock and Laura Morett.
Chico: Those names sound familiar... albeit one had hers legally changed to
reflect her newly-married status. But they are one tribe in "Survivor: Blood vs.
Gordon: That is correct. We'll talk much more about this next week. And
those...are your hoes.
Chico: And that's Brainvision. Switch it, please.
Gordon: (ShUTTING DOWN)
Chico: Still to come on the big show... It's the internet... in 3D! In a new
game. But first... we take two game show chickens and put them in a box to
settle things. Which is only illegal if we bet on it.
Gordon: You're reading WLTI. You give us 22 minutes and we'll give you 22
reasons why we didn't talk about Big Brother at all during this opening round.
Chico: ... Let me check.... Yep. No Big Brother. :-)
(BrainVision has been brought to you by The Newlywed Preseason. QB's and
their Coaches are asked questions about the other person's play calling. This
week's contestants: RGIII, Mark Sanchez and Jay Cutler. Bob Ryan hosts.)