Episode 33.2 - GSNN's Got Talent
June 10

Chico: Hello, I'm Chico Alexander... and this is my act for GSNN's Got Talent...

(Chico starts planking)

Jason: (X)
Brainvision Hamsters: (X)
Augustus the Zombie: (Eats button)
Gordon: (Sits there)
Chico: (Planking) Gordon, hit your X....For the love of God, hit your X!
Gordon: Oh no. I want to see you torture yourself for 90 seconds.
Jason: ROFL

(Chico falls and lands on his stomach)

Chico: Congratulations. I just took 90 seconds of your life away.
Jason: LOL
Chico: I can do another act...
Gordon and Jason: NO!
Chico: Why not, Gordon? You made them suffer through the whole ride. You know, much like Howie Mandel does.
Gordon: That's me :)
Jason: :)
Gordon: But hopefully we'll make this a fun show that no one has to suffer through
Chico: At least unintentionally.
Jason: Agreed.
Chico: From Somewhere in America.... WLTI... is... ON!
Gordon: YAY! Gordon Pepper here, along with Chico and our special guest Mr.
Jason Block.
Jason: Glad to be here!
Chico: Glad to have you. Okay let's get things started with... the return of America's Got Talent!
Gordon: And we start with one of our personal favorites. Like what it's been doing recently, the show bounces from city to city to city.
Chico: We've been to LA, NYC, and San Antonio, I believe.
Gordon: And New Orleans
Chico: We didn't see some of the weirdest acts yet, but we did see some amazing talent. Perhaps the weirdest act to go through to the Vegas callbacks...Special Head. This was from the LA auditions. It's really hard to describe, but I'm going to do it anyway. He meditates, then he takes a walking stick in his left hand...and then seemingly floats in mid-air balancing himself on that walking stick in his left hand.
Gordon: Oooh spooky
Jason: Sort of a magic act?
Chico: Sort of. But not really.
Gordon: More of a meditation act
Chico: It's ...I have no idea what it is. But the judges ate it up. The judges ate. Special Head. Up...
Gordon: I thought the female judges did that backstage.
Chico: Wait a sec...
Jason: That came out wrong
Chico: Yes it did. But not as wrong as this...Chuck from the Bronx eats three raw eggs, a tequila suicide shot, and a ghost pepper in the bathtub.
Jason: I SAW THAT LIVE.
Gordon: As did I.
Chico: Howie allows the act to proceed. Because he's not right in the head.
Gordon: It was much better watching it on TV
Jason: Because watching it Live was insufferable.
Gordon: What made this great was the running commentary from the judges
Chico: Yes. "Excuse me, I have to go hit my X."
Jason: So what do you think of the new judges?
Chico: I think they fit in like a glove. We have one perky bubbly effervescent type. And then we have Gordon Pepper with boobs and a British accent.
Gordon: Don't make fun of my boobs.
Chico: ...
Jason: Seeing it live. It works.
Chico: Cartoon villainy and a little bit of snarky honesty. I didn't think four judges would work. It does. But it's the veterans' show to drive. They're like a twisted little family up in there.
Jason: It is HOWIE'S show.
Gordon: The personalities are different, and each fit their niche. but I'm
going to disagree with you here. It's not Howie's show. it's HOWARD'S.
Chico: I'm going to go out on a limb and say... "Yes". Howard Stern is the driver of the ship. Howie, on the other hand, he's the comic foil to everyone. The yin to the yang.
Gordon: Now did any of you see a Million Dollar act?
Jason: Still early.
Chico: Keep an eye out for Catapult.
Jason: Oh yes! Duh. Catapult was INSANELY good.
Chico: They take what was done previously and ratchet it up a notch.
Gordon: I agree with that. Them and Marty Brown.
Chico: But keep an eye out.
Gordon: My favorite NYC act has yet to perform :)
Chico: But they will, I bet, in the weeks to come.
Gordon: Oh they will. And when they do, you'll know it was my favorite. ;)
Chico: We will. So as we wait for Gordon's favorites to come on stage, we see 18
year olds come on stage. ALL RISE FOR THE BARKER HIGH CLASS OF 2013...
Gordon: (plays Pomp and Circumstance)
Chico: *cuts off* Thank you. It's the graduation day special on TPIR on Friday, which salutes hard working high school grads and their proud parents. Each grad got an iPad mini FOR FREE. I didn't get an iPad when I went off to college. I got a suitcase. Now normally when we have these specials, they're really really really terrible. 1 win, 2 wins, the norm. A good day would be 3. We have this time around...Four wins, $11,000 on a Big Wheel bonus...
Jason: But....
Chico: But let's go to the Showcases. First Showcase is a MacBook Pro, a motor scooter, and a 2013 Fiat 500 Pop. Gordon Pepper, Tenafly High, bid or pass?
Gordon: I'll pass.
Jason: $24,000
Chico: $24,000 for Jason. Gordon... It's a trip around Europe! With stops in London, Amsterdam, Germany, Italy, and Paris, and $1000.. and a 2013 Scion xB.
Gordon: $27,000
Chico: Okay. Jason's Showcase is.... $23,401.
Jason: Damn.
Chico: A little over there. Gordon, your Showcase is... $27,699!
Gordon: YAY! Where's my Scion?
Chico: I'm going to give you the same thing that Ashley & Gregory won
on that Showcase... but since it was a Double Overbid, you get nothing.
Gordon: Boo
Chico: Hey, it's a good car, I just can't afford it right now. Maybe I need to go into acting and singing and douing stuff on a Broadway stage.
Jason: ACTING!
Gordon: Or in this case, Let's Make a Deal going to th Tonys.
Chico: Let's spread the love, shall we?
Jason: Let's.



Chico: I'm going to toss the potato to Jason on this one.
Jason: This was one of the last shows of the season. We have one more left on Monday and then on July 1st. We had one of the best playing of Car Pong ever! Wanna play a couple of the games with me?
Chico: Sure, I'm game.
Jason: Let's play Timeline for a trip to London. Put these Tony Award Winners for Best Musical in chronological order: RENT: THE BOOK OF MORMON, THE SOUND OF MUSIC
Chico: I hate orderly questions.
Jason: Guesses?
Chico: Sound of Music, Rent, Book of Mormon.
Jason: You are...RIGHT. 1960, 1996, 2011. You both have a trip to London. IF YOU want to play for a Scion IQ, Give back the trip and PLACE HAIRSPRAY for me: before 1960, 1960-1996, 1996-2011 or post 2011
Chico: I'm going to keep the trip.
Jason: Gordon?
Gordon: I'm going for it, as I live in NYC and I know Hairspray is between 1996 and 2011
Jason: Do you know what year? Because you got the car!
Gordon: 2003
Jason: Nailed.
Chico: Gordon likes Broadway. Good singer and actor too. Dancing needs work, though. :-)
Gordon: What. Ever.
Jason: Now, here's the best part. David the Nerd is playing Car Pong for a $18,795 Honda Civic. He has 5 seconds and has to answer this question for up to 15 seconds more!

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING BROADWAY MUSICALS HAVE BEEN ADAPTED INTO MOVIES: LES MISERABLES, DREAMGIRLS, MAMMA MIA! and WICKED.

Chico: I got this one.
Jason: Tell me.
Chico: Les Mis, Dreamgirls, with the incredibly talented Jennifer Hudson... and Mamma Mia!
Jason: Very good. David has 20 seconds. He passes on the $500 and ON THE FIRST BALL nails the car.
Chico: He's been practicing.
Jason: He goes on and hits it AGAIN and $1,000 in cash! We also had a trip to the Tonys given away. All in all, a very good show...$64,196 in cash and prizes earned by dealers.
Chico: That's spectacular for one LMAD show.
Jason: And another example of why this show is one of the best on TV. Good use and execution of theme.
Chico: Indeed.
Jason: LMAD is going to end it's season with over $7M given away this year.
Chico: That I believe is a new high.
Gordon: Very nice for LMAD
Jason: I believe Season 5 starts taping this week.
Chico: I believe you are coorect. June 12 is the season premiere taping. That's a Wednesday.
Jason: You know what...go! It's a fun time
Chico: Yessir. What else is fun? Self-righting weeks on talent shows.
Gordon: I would have preferred the Tonys.



Chico: Here's how this week on the Voice shaped up. Judith Hill and Sarah Simmons went home last week. I said Michelle and Sasha were going to be safe this week and that a COUNTRY artist (one from Blake's team) is going to be going home. That woman... HOLLY TUCKER.
Gordon: Not a hard choice here. And unfortunately, I see the same for someone else on Blake's team
Chico: I do too. And I'll tell you why. We have five acts left. We have a pop act, an R&B act, and THREE country acts. Of the three country acts, Amber Carrington (Team Adam) is the weakest. However, Danielle Bradbery (Team Blake) has been for lack of a better phrase, a one-trick pony.
Jason: Too much of a glut
Gordon: Um...Chico. Are you nutty?
Chico: Tell me how I'm wrong.
Gordon: I will tell you. Danielle, despite her not getting out of her comfort zone, has been singing the cover off of her songs. Amber is the weakest country act in an oversaturated field. Bye bye Amber.
Chico: Danielle's a really good singer, but we're about to see how strong her voting base is. Because while she was coasting, Michelle Chamuel was stealing a few votes for herself.
Gordon: And it's a good thing neither of them went to Hell's Kitchen, because
they may not have been able to perform.
Jason: Oh really?



Chico: We had celebrities in the Chef's Tables. The Blue Team were so bad...
Jason: HOW BAD WERE THEY?
Chico: They were SO bad... that Gordon Ramsay had to do something he's NEVER EVER DONE in HK.
Gordon: Oh I know!
Jason: Which is?
Gordon: He joined the Blue team.
Chico: And kicked Zach OUT.
Jason: Gonzo?
Chico: That's the surprising bit. He was allowed to stay in the competition.
Gordon: For now.
Chico: Anthony was gonzo.
Jason: Unreal
Gordon: Well Anrhony wasn't going to win anyways
Chico: Not really, but Zach just checked out, it seemed.
Gordon: He's next. It wouldn't surprise me to see Jon and Mary as the last 2 standing.
Chico: And because of him, Ramsay had to go to the Red Kitchen and take one of THEIR dishes just so the Blues could finish.
Jason: HOLY COW
Chico: If I'm Maria Menounos or Jeremy Sisto, I'm probably ordering Chinese from here on out.
Gordon: Can we order British?
Jason: I like British
Chico: We're going global early and here's why; Pointless is celebrating its 500th episode.
Gordon: Pointless is a fun show that's a reverse family feud. You are given a category and you are supposed to give answers that would fit the category but that no one said.
Jason: Ah.
Chico: It's really awesome. And now that the Chase is coming to the US, it's the "British show we'd most likely want to see on American screens". Thank you, GSN.
Jason: It took over the top spot huh?
Gordon: To some of us. Other of us now want to see Only Connect jump the pond
Jason: Only Connect would RULE.
Chico: Yes it would. And when it gets to 500 episodes, we'll talk about that. =p
Gordon: The hamsters have a Pointless Puzzle.
Chico: Good. This provides a bit of an example of what's been going on for the last 500 shows.
Gordon: Name a place where Chico put the Kitty Litter instead of where he was supposed to have.
Jason: ROFL
Chico: In bed.

(Brobot walks in)

Brobot: beep bop boop...
Jason: Brobot!
Chico: Haven't seen him in a while.
Gordon: I fixed him. 23 hamsters said that. Jason?
Jason: On the dinner plate?
Brobot: beep bop boop
Gordon: 69 people said it.
Jason: Aw.
Chico: Yay! What would be the Pointless answer, G?
Gordon: The pointless answers were: In the garbage and their favorite - on the car roof (hands Chico the garage keys)
Chico: I thought I left something somewhere. Anyway, before we throw it to news, watch this. Courtesy of the BBC...

 
(Courtesy Endemol/BBC)

Gordon: While Chico goes out...Brobot?
Brobot: Roll that beautiful Brain Footage...beep bop boop...

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Thanks, Doug. We've got a few biggies today, but first, I need a bat...
Jason: which one?
Chico: A few green bats.
Jason: (gets Chico the Green Bats)

We have a list of upcoming events, so pay attention. Food Court Wars begins July 7, Ink Master returns July 16. Top Chef masters returns July 24, Top Model returns August 2, and in September, Million Second Quiz and The Chase.

Jason: I am so on the MSQ
Chico: I'm on the Chase.
Gordon: I'm on a Datebook

Surprisingly no new shows, but we do get near the end of The Voice and we continue on the Talent train. We also have Wheel of Fortune's last week of the season and the Father's Day episode of The Price is Right.

Gordon: All of these shows going on. I need to get Fully Loaded
Jason: HIC

Big Brother's coming back later this month, and CBS is making it physically impossible for you to miss out on it, giving it to you on TV, on TVGN, on social media, on the web, on your tablet, on your smartphone, and anywhere else you can figure out how to put Big Brother on it.

Chico: That's a lot of Big Brother .
Jason: That's insane
Gordon: I have more insane for you
Chico: You're gonna love this...

Are YOU Smarter than...Fat Joe, who pleads guilty to tax evasion. Circle may be getting the square in a much bigger house than the Hip Hop Squares set.

Chico: Does it say how much?
Gordon: $700,000, or the bonus round prize of 280 Hip Hop Squares shows combined.
Chico: That's a lot of Squares.
Gordon: It is. He may need some Haterade.
Chico: I know I do. I'm thirsty

According to Khloe Kardashian, Kris Jenner and Bruce Jenner are now living separately.



Gordon: Bruce needs to go on vacation?
Chico: Yes he does. Let's go to Turkey.

They have a game show on in Turkey that's part word game part quiz show, and what the host did was courageous.

Chico: Noting that protests in the country are being underreported in Turkey, we get... this.

http://technosociology.org/?p=1297 

Jason: This was FREAKING BRILLIANT. I loved this. This was great.
Gordon: Well yes and no. I think it was politically active, but I don't know if I want that in my game show.
Jason: No, but a very good way to get a message across.
Chico: Brilliant, even
Gordon: Sure if you don't mind that. Do you like politically active media hoes?
Jason: I do :)
Chico: I do too... in moderation.
Gordon: Luda me
Chico: (plays Luda)

In this week's Media Ho Report, Nigel Lythgoe and Ken Warwick are out on American Idol. Sous Chefs get to compete with Top Chef Masters, David Hill is the new Idol overseer...

Chico: Taking over for Mike Darnell.

Ben Scott was there for Desiree Hancock, Carrie Underwood wins big at the CMT Music Awards, and Dougie Colon is a puppet game show host for ITV.

Gordon: How did Late Night Liars do again?
Chico: *flush*
Jason: *flush*
Gordon: Pretty much, but none of them are your hoes of ther week.
Jason: Who are they?
Gordon: It's Bristol Palin and Joan Rivers - and they are doing the Celebrity Wife Swap thing,.
Chico: Really?
Jason: (*THUD*)
Chico: ... REALLY!?
Gordon: Really. I bet you can't wait.
Jason: Sure I can.
Chico: I'll wait as long as I need to.
Gordon: You probably could. And those...are your hoes.
Jason: Shutting down
Chico: Thank you Jason. Still to come, we review what we've seen and we preview what we haven't.
Gordon: We go toilet hunting one more time, but first. we give you PED's the old fashioned way. You're reading WLTI. you give us 22 minutes and we'll give you 22 acts that we feel need PEDs. Like Chuck from the Bronx.
Chico: Why not. He's been taking everything else.
Jason: (shudders)

(Brainvision is presented by Race to the Alley. Three teams of two try and play different games of bowling as they race in a Winnebago across North Jersey for fun and profit.)

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