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Episode 34.13/14: 2013
YEAR IN REVIEW
December 16/23
Jason: *eats nachos* Chico: *bowls a strike* Jason: *drinks a beer* Gordon: (Collects money) Jason: Who WANTS BRACKETS lol Chico: *powders hams* Welcome back to the WLTI Year in Review. I'm Chico. That's
Gordon. That's Jason. Jason: Yo. Gordon: Hi there. Chico: Of course we can't complete the year without completing the week, so,
let's recap the week, shall we? Starting with...
Jason: How many weeks ago did you call this? Chico: I had this at the beginning of live shows.
Jason: You really hate to do that don't you, G? :) Chico: Nah, man, it just makes the times he gets to hang his own banner even
better. Gordon: No It's only fair. I'm sure that Ive wallpapered the site, so Chico can
do his. Jason: And the thing is..it WAS about the talent, not the judges. Chico: So it was a two-woman race, and Blake was not going to win it. It was
total talent, and Tessanne Chin had JUST A LITTLE MORE than Jacquie Lee. Gordon: This is why The Voice is the #1 show in the USA. The judges are
adversarial in a fun way, not in a nasty uncomfortable way. Chico: Right on. Jason: They legitimately look happy with each other. Gordon: And they want what's best for both the singers and the show. Now as for
the winner - Tessanne Chin - How does she do in the real world? Jason: I think pretty well. Chico: I don't think she gets much in the way of mainstream radio, but she's
going to blow up iTunes. And don't discount that. Not for a second. Jason: She could be the first true Voice success story. Gordon: I think she will fade out, but let's have her enjoy her moment Chico: Time will tell the tale. I definitely see it happening. I also definitely
see this happening.
Chico: Most consistent talent of the year. Jason: I think you have one more trophy :) Chico: I might. Who have y'all got? Jason: Some guy who's an island millionaire Chico: Is it the same guy who visited the LMAD season finale? Yes, we have
pictures, Tyson Apostol. :-)
Chico: Let's break it down as we broke it down last week. We said... If Tyson
gets to the final, he wins. Tyson GOT TO THE FINAL. Took Gervase with him. Took
Monica with him. Jason: Best three for him to win. Chico: Right. Although that last season, the Monica seat, turned out to be
inconsequential. Remember we said it almost doesn't matter who makes it off of
Redemption Island Gordon: And he did. The fatal error here was from Monica, who COULD have changed
the face of the game but didn't Chico: Explain, please Jason: How so? Gordon: Let's go back to 5. We had a 2-2 deadlock. Chico: So someone had to swing Gordon: So the question is - should Monica go with Ciera and Tina, or with Tyson
and Gervase? Ciera and Tina, sorry. She thinks she can win against Tyson and
Gervase. Obviously, she's wrong. It would have been interesting to see what
happened if she turned. Jason: She should have gone to the other side Ciera and Katie instead of being a
puppet dog. I think Monica, for lack of a better term, was a mindless slave. Chico: I don't think it would've mattered because those she turned against would
not have voted for her anyway. Gordon: I'm not sure. Her game play was MUCH better than either Ciera or Tina. Jason: Yes but it would have made it more interesting instead her being a
Cyberman. Chico: Well Jason, here's the thing. We KNOW she's a mindless slave. This was
established when Brad was sent to Redemption Island. She had NO GAME whatsoever. Jason: None. Chico: So we got the 5 out of the way. What happened at 4? Jason: Tina was playing her heart out. She tried to flip Monica every way she
could. Gordon: It was a fait accompli at that point, because if youre not jumping at 5,
you're certainly not going to jump at 4. Jason: Didn't work. Chico: So it was almost like the game fell into Tyson's lap. Jason: Exactly. Gordon: There were only a limited number of scenarios that the game could have
turned, and they didn't Jason: Nope. Monica's brain was in a jar Chico: What have I told you about referencing the Mother Brain on this show? :-)
Jason: :) Chico: So congrats, Tyson Apostol, for outwitting, outplaying, and outlasting 19
others. Now he gets to sit at home and watch Survivor: Brains vs. Brawn vs.
Beauty. They gotta do something, don't they? Jason: Wrong: Brains vs. Brawn vs. BOOBS get it right LOL Chico: Sorry bout that Gordon: Well, we don't know what consits of the 'Beauty' Part just yet Chico: Out of work models? "I got a big rack. Did I get the part?" Gordon: Pretty much. Chico: Okay, from new champions to a new game. It finally aired, guys. CMT's
Win, Lose or Pawn. It's a legitimate pawn shop show,. but it's also a game show. Jason: Explain. Chico: Contestants bring in their wares, and co-host John Cryderman will assess
its value. The mark will try to haggle, just like you've seen on many other
shows. Jason: right. Chico: They will arrive at an offer. If they decline the offer, well, that's the
game. If however they accept the offer, that's when the game show begins. Let's
say Gordon, you have your Godzilla puppet appraised at a final value of $500. Gordon: ok Chico: The other co-host, the always jovial Frank Nicotero, gives you the
opportunity to double it to $1000 by answering 10 trivia questions in a minute. Gordon: Right. Chico: Going back to the Godzilla puppet, each question would be worth 10% of
the value of the object, or, $50. The game continues until all 10 questions have
been asked or until time runs out. And whatever you win you can walk away with
OR, play a one question Double (or Triple) or Nothing Bonus Round. They have
time to play four games in a half hour. Gordon: It's Cash Cab in an auction house. Chico: Basically. Jason: Quick easy down and dirty, but I just don't see the value in this. Chico: So let's start with the good. It's a solid authentic show on both ends of
the spectrum. Jason: Yes. Chico: It's a for-real pawn show, and a solid trivia piece. Answer questions,
win money. Easy. The folks behind this just get the job done. And there's also
the Monty Hall moment, where a contestant can win or lose everything Gordon: The Good - Frank Nicotero is Frank Nicotero and the other guy is decent. Chico: Right. Jason: We <3 Frank Chico: The bad, it only does what it needs to do to get to the end. Gordon: The Bad: It brings NOTHING to the table, and the only part of the pawn
aspect is that it sets the price tag. You can get $1,000 and it wouldn't change
how the game is played at all. Jason: Are you saying it's TOO bare bones? Chico: Almost too bare bones Gordon: It's not about it being bare bones. It's about the bones not connecting
to the right body part. Jason: I get it. A has NO effect on B Gordon: Right. You could replace the elbow with the knee and because it's a
moving joint, makes no difference on the body.
WIN LOSE OR PAWN
CMT - 12:30a ET Thursdays
GORDON
CHICO
JASON
AVERAGE-O-MATIC
C+
B-
C-
C+
Chico: It's a good show, but it doesn't bring anything we haven't seen before.
And yes, you could change the variables and the show wouldn't change at all.
Overall, CMT probably felt justified in putting this thing on late at night with
zero fanfare, but at the same time, it's a decent enough show that probably
deserves a better fate than what will befall it. B- Gordon: I agree, though I'm pawning out the B- and downgrading it to a C+ Jason: I am a little less happy with it. Wish there was more chocolate with the
peanut butter. C- Chico: We continue with the theme of answering questions and winning money with
this week's installment of...
Jason: This was BEAST-ly. Chico: This week, we learned why the Beast was the Beast. Of course, a Final
Chase target of 14 steps doesn't help matters. Now Jason and I watched it and
livecapped it for this weeks' Chase-Cast, at CLW83.com. We both thought and got
a quick takedown. Jason: Yeah not cool. Gordon: And what made it painful,how much money was at stake? Jason: $65,000? I think? Chico: I think so Jason: Adrienne wins $35,000 in the first chase. Chico: In the second Chase, Osahon fell for a giant Beast trap. (ADMIRAL ACKBAR
- It's a TRAAAAP!) Jason: He takes 3 questions to go bye bye after going for the 90K, and Lety wins
$30K In the final pre-chase. So two women go for $65,000. Chico: In the Final Chase, the two ladies get 14, Jason: Their final chase play was AWFUL. Chico: Oh yeah Jason: Lots of 4-5 second pauses Chico: I need a Big Bored, please Gordon: Go for it
How NOT to
Outrun the Beast
- Fall for the trap!
- Waste time on the Final Chase!
- Pushbacks!
Chico: This one's going out to quizzers
everywhere. It's called "How NOT to Outrun the Beast". Let's start with the
Chase. What did Osahon do that he probably shouldn't have? Jason: Taunt the beast? Chico: Taunt the beast AND play on tilt. He had no problem in his Cash Builder,
and the biggest amount he was going for was $90,000. He could've stayed at
$35,000 and be good. Jason: But he got cocky. Chico: He got totes cocky Jason: And once he missed the first question - it was over. Chico: Yup Jason: Now let's talk about the final chase. Chico: Okay, it's a buzzer round, you want as many questions as Brooke can throw
at you. One way to stop that from happening is to buzz in and think about it. If
you have to buzz in and think about it, you're better off passing. Gordon: Its not a time to take time Chico: You need questions that you can instantly answer. Like boom boom boom. Jason: How many times did they pause,about 5-6? Chico: About five or six yeah, at about 5 or 6 seconds a piece. That's 36
seconds WASTED. That's another 5 or 6 seconds to ask Jason: And once the beast got rolling, he got the 14 in A ROW. Chico: Let's just say this - The Beast was on his game today. He had a GOOD DAY. Gordon: And you can't waste 36 seconds and not expect to pay dearly for it Jason: CHOMP. CHEW. GONE. Chico: The Beast will have to wait until January 7 for his next meal. Jason: And we will be back for the Chase Cast as well Chico: Meanwhile it's time for a showdown.
Gordon: Let's get back for some more singing, and one more Who Wins If. Who Wins
If...The SIng-Off Chico: We have country crooners Home Free, background singers Ten (Gordon's
favorite), and the youthful exuberance of Vocal Rush. For ME, Vocal Rush has
been a group that could do anything AND had the energy to do anything. They've
been my favorite from day one. Gordon: They have. But TEN has the back story. Here's the catch: unlike previous
seasons, the JUDGES vote on who wins, NOT the public, which means the edge has
to go to Home Free, because they've never been in the bottom. Chico: If it comes down to votes, then Home Free has the edge. If it comes down
to talent, then it's a case of "who shows up". Gordon: True. I would say that Home Free are your favorites. Chico: I'd agree. Jason? Jason: Broom me. Chico: SWEEP. So congratulations to Pentatonix for winning The Sing-Off, well,
last season. They're really doing well for themselves. Jason: Very much so. BTW, if you want to follow Pentatonix, http://ptxofficial.com/home Chico: Sweet. From one end of the talent show spectrum to the other. From real
product to pasteurized processed overproduced cheese. The X Factor ended, Alex &
Sierra won. But the story - Demi Lovato called it quits that night. Although if
ratings are any indication, it may be academic. Jason: Not a shock Chico: So Demi's out. But you have to ask, does it even matter at this point? Jason: I dont see it happening in season 3. But UK's version just finished
Season 10. And it might be their biggest winner ever :) Gordon: I think the show is going to bo bye bye Chico: I think so too. This was a make-or-break season. If it didn't produce a
hit act, it was going to go the way of the dodo, the nene, the kookaburra, and
intelligent discourse. It couldn't even produce a decent show. Jason: X Factor is going to be part of the culling of the glut of talent shows Chico: Let's see, you have The Voice, Dancing with the Stars, Idol, and this.
Yeah, something's gotta give. Gordon: Pretty much. Chico: And since Dancing came off of a better than average season EVEN AGAINST
THE VOICE. We'll see how Idol does in the new year. But it's a make or break for
that as well. It needs a solid performance and a solid championship. We can't
have another Candice Glover. And we can't have another season where no one is
going to be the voice of the people. Jason: Wont that be in our next segment? Chico: Yes it will, but first, I need to load the hams, the bookworm, the
goldfish, the pig, and you can load the cat. Jason: Easy Eve, Easy, OW!
(Eve runs away)
Gordon: Come here Eve. Good girl.
(Eve walks over. Gordon puts Eve in Choppler)
Gordon: Funny, I never have had a problem handling Eve. I wonder why? Jason: Evil likes Evil? ;) Chico: Bingo. Okay, let's do the news! Gordon: (shrugs) Roll that Beautiful Brain Footage
(Doug:
Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to
your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper,
Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)
Chico: Thanks, Doug Morris, as always. First up in the news, I'm going to need
the festive holiday bat Jason: The one with the lights and wrapping paper? Chico: Yep Jason: (hands Chico the Holiday Bat and flips light switch) There :) Chico: I'm going to take you back to November 23-25, a day that would be known
as the Day of the Doctor. Theatres around the world were showing Doctor Who's
anniversary special, and i think it beat out a few of the more hyped features
showing that day. Jason: 10.2M dollars Worldwide BTW for Doctor Who Gordon: Yay!
Taking
a hint from that, Fox has inked a deal to premiere the new season of American
Idol on the big screen...why?
Chico: Fans in cities across the country are invited to attend an exclusive
screening of the new season of AMERICAN IDOL XIII on Tuesday, Jan. 14 at 7:00 PM
ET/6:00 PM CT/5:00 PM MT/4:00 PM PT. After the multi-city free screening, there
will be an interactive Q&A, featuring iconic AMERICAN IDOL host Ryan Seacrest
and superstar judges Jennifer Lopez, Keith Urban and Harry Connick, Jr. Gordon: ...why???? Chico: I have no idea! Jason: This. Is. DUMB. Chico: If you are not near one of these cities, it will stream love on
AmericanIdol.com. But again, Why. Gordon: Ok Here's why Dr. Who in the theaters is cool and Idol in the theaters
is not. You can't get access everywhere for Dr. Who for BBC America - plus it's
sci-fi, so you get lots of shiny sound effects. WHY would you think Idol would
get the same numbers? Chico: Because the show is the show. The thing is, the show hasn't been the show
ever since Phillip Phillips won it. Jason: (SNIFF) You smell that? Chico: I smell it Jason: Desperation - by Nigel Lythgoe. In stores in January Chico: That's a break. :-) Gordon: Does he have a Datebook for it? Chico: I believe all we have is the one finale.
We
have The Sing Off and the Great Christmas Light Snooze finales. And a Hollywood
Game Night Holiday Special MONDAY.
Chico: Interesting story about the Christmas lights, if I can get into some
premature Haterade Gordon: You may. Chico: Apparently endings were produced for both outcomes for all the families
involved. As in each family was told they won $50,000, then told, just kidding!
By the way, we need to shoot a reaction to a loss now. Jason: DAMN. NASTY. Gordon: That has to be some sort of illegal something somewhere Chico: You think? And you wonder why no one is watching it Gordon: Another last second nominee for our 2014 March Badness worst show of the
year tournament Chico: You're taking notes on this, right? Jason: We all are. Chico: Okay, take a break, let's get loaded. And it's a BIG ONE.
If
you have an iPhone, or an iPad, or an iPod, it's the best dollar you'll spend
all week. THE CHASE. THE HOME GAME. ONLY ON iOS. Gordon's been asking for this
since forever.
Gordon: ...Well, close. Chico: One of the best adaptations of a game show ON iOS. Plays 1 to 4 players
on the same device. Plays JUST like the GSN show. And yes, it's social media
capable. Meaning if you win against the Beast, you can let all your friends on
Facebook and Twitter know about it Jason: Waiting for the Android version :) Chico: Only $1 on the iTunes App Store. I highly recommend it. Oh, you know
what? Going to thechaseapp.com. You CAN get it on Google Play and the Amazon
Appstore. So congratulations, you now have NO EXCUSE to pick this up
Gordon: Well that would indeed be smart Jason: Uh oh I smell dumb people Chico: Me too
Are
YOU Smarter than,..Dan 'Nitro' Clark, who suffers a heart attack, gets admitted
to the hospital, and says that he's sure that STEROIDS he took from his days on
American Gladiators caused it.
Chico: Credibility. GONE. Gordon: Drugs are bad, mmmkay? Jason: Dumb. Ass. Gordon: And now for some Haterade.
First
of all, Maksim and Kate Upton are done after 6 months.
Jason: I have a chance! LOL Chico: Step in line, son Gordon: Now for the wrong but funny department.
Stereotude has come up with a list of 21 inanimate objects that Miley Cyrus
has voilated. Check it out here:
Chico: HA! Jason: ROFLMAO Chico: Okay, let me get over my laughing fit. I need to step on the soap box.
Miley, you chose to be crazy. Now you're known not for your talent, but for
being crazy. Fergodssake stop it. Gordon: Miley needs to go on vacation so she can violate some foreign objects. Jason: Um...ok...to where? Chico: Japan. Gordon: whoo hoo
Where
Masahiro Tanaka goes on a Japanese game show, pitches, and then outcooks TV
chefs in competition
Jason: Hmmm, Touch Em All candidate :)
Now
you're probably wondering why it's a big deal for Masahiro Tanaka. Well, he's a
pitcher for the Rakuten Golden Eagles, and right now a decision is being made as
to whether or not to post him for MLB agents.
Chico: So far, the Dodgers and the Yankees are the only ones in contention that
we know of. Jason: Boy howdy do the yankees need him Chico: Here's Tanaka-san on video.
Chico: If the Eagles do post him for MLB, imagine the coverage he'll get. Jason: Huge. Chico: He'll be the next Yu Darvish. The next Dice-K. The next media ho
to come out of the Japanese bigs. Gordon: I like media hoes Chico: (Luda)
In this week's Media Ho Report, Pat Sajak's daughter is doing country, Mike
SKupin may be involved in a Ponzi
scheme, Steve Harvey will interview Barack Obama...
Chico: We gon' play, Mr. President!
Wayne Brady hosts the BETs, Jerry Springer hosts 'Tabloid', and Simon Cowell
INSISTS that The X-Factor will return
next year.
Jason: Suuuuure Simon. Gordon: But none of them are your ho of the week Chico: Who have you? Gordon: I have Lucinda Aragon, who is on the Bachelor, though she is currently
dating someone not named Juan Pablo Jason: uh oh :) Chico: It gets better Jason: (eats popcorn) Go on Gordon: And the fact that you can see her boobies. NSFW.
Chico: AND She's dating the CEO of Snapchat Jason: Ka-Ching! Gordon: Well, there are the snaps that you can go chat about. Chico: And her BFF is Kate Upton. Jason: BTW,I haven't the NSFW work pics
Chico: She has no boobs. Them HIPS, THO. Jason: We are pervs LOL Gordon: And those...are your hoes. Chico: And that's Brainvision. Punch us out, J. Jason: Shutting down Chico: Still to come, push or flush, but as we go to break and the roll call of
game show icons we lost this year,
we regrettably have to add a friend of ours. Over the last week, Travis Penery,
who you may know from his columns
over at Buzzerblog, succumbed to a stroke. He had a lot of insight on British
game shows that he brought to us
Yanks, and he will be missed. Jason: 29 (shakes head) Chico: And if I may say so, 29 is simply far too young. Travis Penery, dead at
29. We'll be right back.
In Loving
Memory...
GIA ALLEMAND contestant, "The Bachelor"
BB ANDERSEN contestant, "Survivor Borneo"
JAMES AVERY actor; panelist, "Match Game"
CONRAD BAIN actor; panelist, "The Hollywood Squares", "Rhyme & Reason"
FRANK BANK actor; panelist, "The Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour"
DEREK BATEY host, "Mr. & Mrs."
DR. JOYCE BROTHERS psychologist; contestant, "The $64,000 Question"
TODD CHRISTENSEN football legend; co-host, "American Gladiators"
DAVID COLEMAN host, "A Question of Sport"
JEANNE COOPER actress; contestant, "Celebrity Family Feud"
MARK CORWIN producer, "Wheel of Fortune"
JOAN FONTAINE actress; panelist, "Password"
BONNIE FRANKLIN actress; panelist, "Match Game"
SIR DAVID FROST journalist/broadcaster; host, "Ultra Quiz"
ANNETTE FUNICELLO actress; panelist, "The Hollywood Squares"
JULIE HARRIS actress; panelist, "Pyramid"
CHRIS KYLE soldier; panelist, "Stars Earn Stripes"
ED LAUTER actor; panelist, "Pyramid"
PHILLIP LEISHMAN host, "Wheel of Fortune NZ"
BRAD "THE ANIMAL" LESLEY baseball player; "Animal", "Takeshi's Castle"
JOSH MARKS "MasterChef" season 3 champion
MAC McGARRY host, "It's Academic"
ALAN MITSUGI "Game Show Talk & Fun" host
CORY MONTEITH actor/singer; mentor, "The Glee Project"
PETER O'TOOLE player, "Wetten, dass..."
PATTI PAGE singer/actor; mystery guest, "What's My Line?"
TRAVIS PENERY Buzzerblog contributor
HENRY POLIC II actor; host/panelist, "Double Talk", "Pyramid"
JACK SHEA director; Goodson-Todman writer
MEL SMITH actor; contestant, "Celebrity Mastermind", "The Celebrity Apprentice",
"They Think It's All Over"
JEAN STAPLETON actress; panelist, "The Hollywood Squares"
PAUL WALKER actor; contestant, "I'm Telling!"
MARCIA WALLACE actress; panelist, "Match Game"
GEOFFREY WHEELER host, "Top of the Form", "Winner Takes All"
(Brought to you by Desperation, Between the love of the game, and lack of
ratings, there's Desperation. The new
fragrance by Nigel Lythgoe. Available at macy*s)
Jason: *eats nachos*
(
Taking
a hint from that, Fox has inked a deal to premiere the new season of American
Idol on the big screen...why?
We
have The Sing Off and the Great Christmas Light Snooze finales. And a Hollywood
Game Night Holiday Special MONDAY.
If
you have an iPhone, or an iPad, or an iPod, it's the best dollar you'll spend
all week. THE CHASE. THE HOME GAME. ONLY ON iOS. Gordon's been asking for this
since forever.
Are
YOU Smarter than,..Dan 'Nitro' Clark, who suffers a heart attack, gets admitted
to the hospital, and says that he's sure that STEROIDS he took from his days on
American Gladiators caused it.
First
of all, Maksim and Kate Upton are done after 6 months.
Where
Masahiro Tanaka goes on a Japanese game show, pitches, and then outcooks TV
chefs in competition
Now
you're probably wondering why it's a big deal for Masahiro Tanaka. Well, he's a
pitcher for the Rakuten Golden Eagles, and right now a decision is being made as
to whether or not to post him for MLB agents.