September 3, 2007

Chico:  TODAY! Amber cries...
Gordon: Waaaaaa
Chico:  And then... Amber cries some more...
Gordon: Waaaaaa
Jason:  waaaaaa
Chico:  And then... Amber cries some more...
Gordon: Waaaaaa
Jason:  waaaaaaaaa
Gordon: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Chico:  And then... wait, that's not Amber, that's our new game!
Gordon: (Baby) Waaaaaa
Chico:  From somewhere in America's nursery, the Call the Whaaaaambulance edition of We Love to Interrupt is.... ON!
Jason:  I heard Michigan is crying too.
Gordon: Well, I'm crying, because this is also the last episode of our 15th season on the air.
Jason:  15 "seasons" --not bad.
Gordon: Or 5 years.
Chico:  "Five years" sounds better.
Jason:  5 years sounds a lot better.
Gordon: Lets start the tears. Dr. Chico, what is Amber crying about first?
Chico:  Amber's crying first because... well, let's get down to it. She was booted from the BB House this week.
Gordon: Awwwww. NOT.
Jason:  Don't let your anti-Semitic behind hit the door on the way out.
Chico:  Simple question... what happened?
Gordon: What happened was that Amber is like your basic screwdriver...a tool. Amber was used by everyone in the house. She was usually used by Dustin, and then the late night crew, and then Jameka. And finally, with the new Late Night Crew in power, they decided that Amber was no longer a useful tool. So they threw her out with yesterday's garbage.
Chico:  Did Jameka play the Jeebus card again? She played the Jeebus card, didn't she?
Gordon: Yes, Jameka played the Jeebus card. And Amber, who already hates the Jews, gets eliminated, by ironically, Eric, the remaining Jew in the house. America told Eric to bounce Amber.
Chico:  So he did.
Jason:  America was smart.
Chico:  But Eric had better watch his back. He's already a made man, which makes him ripe for being picked off. Bottom line is, if he doesn't win HOH, he had better be in the pocket of someone who does.
Gordon: The new Head of Household is Zach, who is connected to Dick and Danielle, who voted to save him and get rid of Amber. So hence, they are not going up, but Jameka (who voted to get rid of him) and Jessica are. Veto was won by Daniele, who will probably not use it - not should she.
Chico:  So all things considered, Jameka had probably better start spreading the good word, or else she's going to be banished.
Gordon: The right target this week is Jameka. She's the last person in a busted alliance and one of the floaters.
Chico:  And you want to off her before she gets a shot at HOH again!
Gordon: By getting rid of her, the Donatos (who completely control the voting power) do not have to break an alliance too early. Plus quite frankly, if she gets to the final 2, she wins.
Jason:  Do you think this is setting up for the Dick and Daniele final?
Gordon: It's sure looking like it. Thursday is a DOUBLE ELIMINATION night, and with both Donatos able to play for HOH, this is looking bad for Zach.
Gordon: Don't forget that once we get to 4, anyone can play, regardless of them being HOH.
Chico:  Things are finally getting saucy.
Gordon: With Jameka gone though, I don't mind if any of the 5 people left win Big Brother. They have all earned it - especially Eric and Dick, who have played hard.
Chico:  The only thing is, if Eric wins, America doesn't get to see any of that CBS money. Woops.
Jason:  That would be a check of a bout a sixth of a cent
Gordon: If Eric or Dick win, they have to give a MAJOR assist to the producers for helping them get further in this gam...uh...entertainment program.
Chico: Heh.
Gordon: My favorite part of the show, by the way, was Julie asking Amber if G-d did not want her to win Big Brother 8.
Chico:  I noticed that Amber never really answered that question.
Gordon: That's what doing drugs will do. Kids - don't do drugs. Drugs are bad.
Chico:  Another question Amber "never really answered"... the $1 million question on Power of 10. Because she didn't get that far.
Gordon: Amber gets a consolation check of $1,000. Mr. Alexander, the question, please?

In 2005, the city council of Denver banned all pit bulls from the city, citing the breed's history of attacking humans. What percentage of Americans think people should not be allowed to keep pit bulls as pets?

Chico:  "Talking to you, Michael Vick." Amber... likes Michael Vick. She wont after September 22.
Jason:  Oh yeah she wont
Gordon: I saw the show, and Amber feels that most of America will think it's ok to keep pit bulls as pets.
Chico:  But yes, she guessed at 27-47.
Gordon: Amber...does not have her finger anywhere close to the pulse of America.
Chico:  Her final guess is 18-38. America said... 55%. She leaves the Big Brother house with only $1000 to show for it... and even that was gotten on another show. If you look at the question, it was one of those questions that could've gone either way. On one hand, you have freedom-loving dog owners who want the city council to go sit on it. On the other hand, you have people who are deathly protective about their families.
Jason:  And you don't know if the Michael Vick situation was used in the poll question or was around.
Chico:  The point is that there really was no clear divide. No "right" or "wrong" answer as it were. You know that there's an honest answer and a right answer... Not in this case. There's only an honest answer.  It's the exception that proves the rule.
Gordon: I completely disagree.
Chico:  Do explain.
Gordon: Most of America doesn't want a put bull as a pet, period.
Jason:  They see it as a part of a criminal culture and a dangerous cutlure
Gordon: Even before Michael Vick's situation, we've had countless stories on how pit bulls have been eating people's faces. Add the older skew we've been talking about, and this seemed like a very easy - put the pointer between 50-70% for the $100,000.
Chico:  I don't know. There was a huge outrage over the law that was passed initially. You can't have that big of an outrage without the numbers to back it up, right?
Gordon: I think the dog lovers would put the number under 70%, but a pit bull is not a cute and cuddly dog. It's a walking four legged piranha.
Jason:  Pretty much.
Gordon: The second Amber locked in 18-38, I was waiting for the next set of contestants to show up.
Chico:  Probably because she was only thinking of people like herself, right?
Gordon: Note to Amber. The 'Good People' do NOT own pit bulls!
Jason:  Nope they don't
Gordon: So so far, after Jamie's record setting win, we've given away less than $20,000.
Jason:  But people like the game...the ratings have been consistent
Chico:  And the good news...  Amber's flameout was the highest rated episode. And Wednesday's show won its time slot.
Gordon: And unfortunately, that means that we'll be seeing more 'celebrity' editions of said show. Groan.
Chico:  So there's probably a good chance that we'll see season 2 Electric Boogaloo... and soon. Sounds like you want to make fun of celebrities, G.
Gordon: Let's make fun of them
Jason:  Ok lets.
Chico:  And we'll be making fun of TWO groups of celebrities!
Gordon: And I can't find a better medium this week to see them do it by watching them rap.
Jason:  I have to disagree, I saw it with you. Celebrity Rap Star wasn't as bad as "But Can They Sing?".
Gordon: it definitely was not as bad as But Can They Sing
Jason:  This was "But Can they Rap"...some could, some couldn't.
Chico:  I'll have to side with J on this one...If only for the appearance of some of the rappers.
Gordon: I'll even say that this was better than Celebrity Duets.
Jason:  Yes
Chico:  And this is even better than the White Rapper show.
Gordon: You actually have 3 artists who CAN rap. Big Board please.

Gordon: Let's start with the good rappers. Countess Vaughn absolutely tore the roof off. She was HOT! Joining her in the White Boys Can Rap category is Sebastian Bach. The Skid Row Rocker too a page from Kid Rock's book.
Jason:  Yes he did...I always liked him
Chico:  I was kinda surprised with Sebastian Bach...But at the same time.. Isn't 80's Metal just rapping while screaming?
Gordon: Maybe, but regardless, Sebastian pulled it off.
Jason:  He's done rock, theater. He can do it all.
Gordon: Those look like your early finalists. Right behind them was Shar Jackson. She's got the talent in the Shar/K-Fed marriage.
Chico:  Shar got it from Brandy... they were doing Moesha together.
Gordon: Now we move from the good to mediocre category. They have potential, but they were not as good as the top artists.
Jason:  Jamal Anderson
Gordon: Best of the bland. He's got skillz. he now has to work on delivery. Perez Hilton has the opposite problem. He has the moxy. he now has to technically get it down.
Jason: Agreed.
Gordon: Then we have the fodder - aka - first 3 rappers to go home. We start with the one that has the most potential - Kendra Wilkinson, because she's been in Playboy and looks real good nekkid.
Chico:  Kendra Wilkinson and Jason Wahler... two reality hoes... not surprisngly... a little... yeah.
Gordon: Jason Wahler, from The Hills, decided to rap lyrics from...uh...what song was he rapping from? I know what song he was SUPPOSED to have been rapping from...
Chico:  Supposedly, it was "Ridin'" by Chamillionaire...
Gordon: But what song did he WIND UP rapping from, because those lyrics didn't match up?
Chico:  It reminded me of another song that sounded like that... "White and Nerdy."
Gordon: But at least he tried, which is more than you can say for Efren Ramirez, who used the Brandon Rogers playbook on rapping.
Chico:  For those of you playing along at home, Brandon Rogers was the American Idol 6 finalist who s(^_^)faced his way out of the top 12.
Gordon: When he was rapping, he went 'er' and 'uh'. Most of the time, we heard silence and the rapper saying his own lyric in the background on a safety track.
Chico:  That... was... pathetic.
Gordon: Following the voting pattern from American Idol 6, I expect Efren to be the first one gone.
Chico:  We'll find out on Thursday. Now for the ratings...Good... It isn't "But Can You Sing", and some of the people were actually talented. Bad... the people who were bad... were REALLY bad. Final rating... C-.
Jason:  MY ratings...better than "Sing"....C.
Gordon: I'm waiting for a celebrity show where ALL of the celebrities can be talented. Of course, that will never happen, so we have to settle for this. I'll go C+, just because the judges were spot on and were not like the ones on the other celebrity talent shows. They kept it real.
Gordon: Now we move from Rapping...to dancing. Chico, do we have the list of newbies for Dancing with the Stars?
Chico:  Yes we do. And this one came from the official announcement. So it's 100% legit. But before we do, a spiel if I may. With apologies to Dwight Lauderdale of WPLG in Miami...There is nothing more important to us at GSNN than your trust. We think about our readers, not about other sites, when we make our news gathering decisions. I've seen what those mainstream guys do...Often times, they slap something on the web just to say that they're the first. And that is NOT serving you. It's our job to get the news out there as soon as possible, but it's our responsibility to make sure that the facts are correct. Now we all make mistakes, but to pay off a mole to get the information, and then blame the network and production company for supplying it when the truth comes to light does nothing more than erode the credibility of reputable journalism everywhere.
Gordon: There have been many times that we have stopped putting stuff on our site because we could not verify it facutally. We have gotten our reputation as one of the best sites because of that. We did NOT put up the TMZ article because we didn't want to jump the gun. And this is why you trust us to be your source of news. And we thank you for that.
Chico:  Especially if you're 5th estate (or 4th).
Gordon: So without further ado, it's time to...Rate the Stars! Do we have the official CORRECT list, Chico?
Chico:  We do! Big Board me!

Chico:  This one is called.. Rate the Stars... Episode V, A New Hype.
Jason:  I like that one
Chico:  Thanks, just came up with it. First up, Melanie Brown, aka Scary Spice. Mother of Eddie Murphy's baby.
Jason:  Mid pack
Chico:  Dancing was a big part of being in the Spice Girls. That's going to help her.
Gordon: The Brits do have a popularity contingency here, and the Spice Girls are still big. She can dance. Last female left.
Chico:  I agree. But she'll have tough competition against...Sabrina Bryan of the Disney Channel's "Cheetah Girls" movies. Corporate knuckle AND good for the kiddies. She's going to be mid pack toward the top, I think. What place did Monique Coleman finish?
Jason:  Didn't work for Billy Ray Cyrus or Monique Coleman
Gordon: I think she will be  up there, but this audience skews older. I think she'll also be middle of the pack, upper level, but I think Scary wil out dance her.
Chico:  Next, requisite sports guy Helio Castronieves... Formula 1 driver.
Jason:  First or 2nd out...Sorry
Chico:  Two time Indy 500 winner...I think he's under the rock myself.
Gordon: He doesn't have a name. Even thought he is an athlete, I don't see him challenging for the title. Middle of the pack.
Chico:  Next up...Mark Cuban... self-made billionaire... owner of the Dallas Mavericks.. requisite game show host... Gordon's nemesis.
Gordon: Oh yes, and how did The Benefactor do?
Chico:  It didn't.
Jason:  (BUZZ)
Chico:  He's gonna lose, but damn it if he doesn't have a little fun doing it.
Jason:  He stays in for about 4 or 5 shows.
Gordon: Not the first one out, but definitely lower half.
Chico:  I betcha Samantha's going to try to tear into his soul (she's good for that), and he's going to give a wiseass answer.
Jason:  He's good for that.
Gordon: I would agree. next?
Chico:  Next... Jennie Garth, coerced by former 90210 classmate Ian Ziering. I'm guessing that she's going to go as far as he did.
Jason:  Well, yeah...not that popular...can dance a lil...mid pack
Chico:  Agreed.
Gordon: I'll concur. I can see her in the top 3 ladies, maybe 6th.
Chico:  Okay, next up...Josie Maran... actress... model... who? She's going to be the who? this season. Her and that other model.
Gordon: Sexy Model + Unknown Name = Quick Exit. First woman gone.
Chico:  See Finnessey, Shandi.
Gordon: And even Shandi was sort of known.
Jason:  Josie dated David Blaine and was in Need For Speed: Most Wanted.
Chico:  Ah. I should play that game. =p
Jason:  Kicks major butt.
Gordon: But how many gamers will put down the remote and pick up a cell phone? I'm guessing not a lot.
Chico:  True. Next... Cameron Mathison... All My Children. Satisfies three rules. 1) Soap star. 2) ABC shill...3) Game host. He is the host of SoapNet's I
Wanna Be a Soap Star.
Gordon: Early co-favorite to win the while thing. Top 4.
Jason:  Unfortunately,  I agree with this weak, weak class.
Gordon: and I agree with Jason 4) Very weak class in terms of name recognition.
Chico:  So it satisfies four rules...So he's going Top 5... and maybe a better deal out of this. MAYBE. It's the most popular show on ABC right now. Okay, next up... "Pretty Boy" Floyd Mayweather. Boxer. I'm thinking he goes ALL the way.
Jason:  He will be the final male. Athletes do well here
Chico:  An athlete won the whole shebang last year.
Gordon: My other co-favorite to win the whole thing. Evander got pretty far on deteriorated skills. This is a boxer in his prime. He has name recognition and he can dance. Top 4.
Chico:  It'll all depend on who his partner is. Next...Wayne Newton...Mr. Las Vegas. The bad news... he's the old one. The good news is he is Mr. Vegas. The good news... he's still got boatloads of energy.
Jason:  I like him to go far.
Gordon: The old one winds in 5th or 6th. I think with such a bad name recognition factor, that this is the person who finally breaks the Top 5 barrier. Top 4.
Chico:  Hmm... middle toward the top, but that's about as high as I give him.
Gordon: Wayne's got a TON of popularity. He could be a major dark horse.
Chico:  Could be.
Gordon: Next one?
Chico:  Marie Osmond.. professional Osmond.
Gordon: Maybe if this was held 20 years ago she has a shot, but now...eh. Lower tier.
Jason:  True. She is a pro...but...
Chico:  Gosh.. well, fans of Marie Osmond watch, at least. That'll help, right?
Gordon: How many Marie Osmond fans do YOU know?
Chico:  ... none. They all like Donny. All three of them.
Jason:  Hey. Don't knock the Osmonds.
Chico:  Not knocking them. I'm just saying I don't know that many middle-aged fans of Marie Osmond...
Gordon: Jay - are...you a fan?
Jason:  Not enough to vote...but I watched her as a kid.
Gordon: That's nice. Next one?
Chico:  Remember I was talking to you about "that other model"?
Jason:  yeah
Chico:  Survey says.. Albert Reed.
Jason:  Male Model.
Chico:  Yes, such things exist. =p  I don't know him either.
Gordon: Let's see...what did I say earlier...oh yeah - Sexy Model + Unknown Name = Quick Exit. First man gone.
Jason:  Agreed
Chico:  Tell Tucker Carlson I said what up. Finally...Jane Seymour... okay, "Dr. Quinn."
Jason:  The older woman role...mid pack...see Marie Osmond.
Gordon: She'll have plenty of time to be looking at sprained ankles and sore bunions after she gets booted quickly. Lower level.
Chico:  Lower of the middle.
Gordon: So to sum this up - you're top 4 are... Floyd, Cameron, Melanie, Wayne
Chico:  Floyd... Mel B... Cameron... and Wayne.
Jason:  I agree with Gordon as well...Floyd, Cameron, Melanie and Wayne
Gordon: Since we all agree, we'd like to congratulate Mark Cuban for winning Dancing With the Stars 5.
Jason:  lol
Chico:  And on that same tip, we want to congratulate Sanjaya for winning
Grand Slam.
Gordon: Two people who will not be dancing with each other, but against each other - Ogi Ogas and Ken Jennings.
Jason:  One we expected in the final...and Ogi...not so much. But he has been playing well.
Chico:  Ogi's the classic Cinderella story.
Gordon: They have both been machines in the tournament, each of them being taxed by one tough opponent and blindsiding their other 2 competitors.
Chico:  But how will that fare against each other? I think this one is going to be pretty close.
Gordon: Well since Jason and I have both seen the finals, I'll say that the winner has a G and an S somewhere in his last name.
Chico:  It's just a matter of who's got the most time going in.
Gordon: And the first name is 3 letters long.
Chico:  And you two and snicker at me all you want, but yeah...
Gordon: (snicker)
Jason:  (giggle)
Chico:  Was it fun to watch at least?
Gordon: (guffaw)
Jason: (titter)
Chico:  I mean, were you on the edge, at least?
Gordon: It was a well played final.
Jason:  We will tell all stories next time.
Chico:  Fine enough. Ogas vs. Jennings for the season 1 title. Saturday! Be there.
Gordon: And in the Hamster bracket...we have a winner!
Chico:  Who is it?
Gordon: The winning hamster is....Chen-bot!
Chico: Whee!
Gordon: Apparently, Chen-bot didn't answer any question right, but she bored the rest of the hamsters to sleep.
Chico:  That'll do it.
Gordon: Jason, here's some cheese. Can you wake the hamsters up with it? We have to do Brainvision.
Jason:  (tosses the cheese in) Damn, they're hungry...looks like they are ready to go.
Chico:  Okay, make Brainvision go now!
Gordon: Roll that beautiful brain footage.

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico:  Thanks, Doug. First up...I have a date with a geek, and we're going
to see a band.
Gordon: Nice!
Jason:  Sounds ok

That's Beauty and the Geek, September 18.... and October 19 gives us "The Next Great American Band". Your judges... John Rzeznik of the Goo Goo Dolls... Sheila E... and Dicko. That's Ian Dickson.

Jason:  Sounds like a plan
Gordon: Then after the concert, are you going to take the geek dancing from
September 24-26?
Chico:  Sure am.

Taking a page from Idol's book, ABC will have the men on Monday and the women on Tuesday.

Chico:  And the results are on Wednesday.
Gordon: Yep. Next article...I also have a date.
Chico:  Great, we can double.
Gordon: Unfortunately, it's with a bunch of angry people who are arguing about paychecks.
Chico:  Umm... Care to explain that one, Gordon?

Wednesday, September 19, the Writers Guild of America (WGA) and Alliance of Motion Picture & Television Producers (AMPTP) return to the negotiation table to see if they can come to any terms before the expiration date of the current contact at the end of October. This could get ugly.

Chico:  If they can... good for them. If they can't... good for us.
Gordon: The networks are already scrambling to stockpile shows. Most of them, of course, the reality and game show kind.
Chico:  Let's just hope that they aren't thrown together retreads. The threat of such things ought to bring the WGA and the AMPTP together to fight what they may view as "the common enemy."
Gordon: I'm thinking that if we span the globe, we nmay get some more original programming.
Jason:  Oh yeah
Chico:  Let's take a trip, shall we?
Jason:  I have my passport
Chico:  First, to the Philippines, where a game show is stirring up ANOTHER controversy.
Jason:  what now?
Chico:  Old business first.

Wowowee host Willie Revillame is acquitted on all charges relating to the February 2006 disaster.

Jason:  for those who don't remember what that was?
Chico:  1st Ann'y of Wowowee, stadium overcrowding, 74 people dead.
Jason:  New business?
Chico:  New business: now the Dept. of Justice thinks that he cheated contestants on a different segment. The video is available on YouTube.

In the video, a contestant decided to forego her chance for the P2-million jackpot, and the host then proceeded to show where the jackpot was among the circular containers that showed either zero or the winning number.

Chico:  The production company is calling it "an honest mistake." "Honest mistakes" lead to far worse.
Gordon: Because the winning jackpot had a 2...and ALSO a zero, so if the person selected that, then they could switch the number from 2 to 0 if it was selected, neglecting the jackpot.
Chico:  The video showed a black film,then a 2.
Jason:  I just saw the video. Not good.
Chico:  Not good at all?
Jason:  it looked very amateurish
Gordon: Not good at all. I see major problems ahead.
Chico:  Well, from major problems comes major potential, as we go to Canada..

"Are You Smarter Than a Canadian 5th Grader?" has a host... Ladies and gentlemen... Colin Mochrie.

Jason:  And now almost everyone with Whose Line has a job.
Gordon: Good for Colin. He should be great on that sort of show.
Jason:  Colin will be great
Chico:  Just need to get Brad Sherwood another game show, and we're good to go.
Gordon: Now we need to get Ryan Stiles a game show hosting gig.
Jason:  Proops...not so much :)
Chico:  We love Whose Line...
Gordon: ...but we'll be Haterading on Big Brother this week. Anyone for a few glasses?
Jason:  I am thirsty
Chico:  Fill'er up bar keep.
Jason:  Make it Rain.
Gordon: First up...

We see that the UK has axed Celebrity Big Brother, due to the controversy over last season.

Jason:  You don't have a Jade Goody saying bad things about Indian people without consequences.
Gordon: Secondly...

You know all of those exit interviews the contestants have had? Because of Amber's comments about Jews, Jameka's comments about Jews and Gays, and Dick's hating on everything, the media is now officially not allowed to speak to ANY of the house guests, this right after the AP declined to show up at an interview because they were told they could not ask Amber about her anti-Semitic comments.

Chico:  Ouch. That's rather strict.
Gordon: So apparently, the 'Good People' have no problem railing against people who are not like them.
Chico:  Hasn't stopped "the good people" before.
Jason:  You guys wanted controversy, and now you are trying to prevent people from reporting on it....that's just dumb..
Gordon: They only want 'good' controversy.
Jason:  CBS is playing both sides and looking like total morons.
Chico:  They did that a long time ago. Remember Big Brother 2?
Jason:  The knife incident
Gordon: Dick and Jen going at it - Good Controversy. Amber going after Eric over a secret he foolishly told Jen - good controversy. Amber and Jameka talking about people who's advertisers could yank their ads - bad controversy.
Jason:  But this is what CBS Wanted....
Chico:  In the end, it's about one thing...And we all know what that one thing is.
Jason:  PROFIT
Chico:  Bingo.
Jason:  (Shudder)
Gordon: Let's just put in a KKK Member, a Black Panther, a Bible Thumper, a Goth Lesbian Chick, a Viet Nam Vet, a Vietnamese Orphaned due to the war, an abortion doctor, a child growing up as an adopted baby, a drug addict, a health counselor, a gay activist with AIDS, a post-op tranny, a Nazi, and a conservative Jew.
Jason:  DONT GIVE THE EXECS ANY IDEAS :)
Chico:  Sounds like an ep of Without Prejudice.
Gordon: Can't we just all get along? (waiting to be beaten down with night sticks)
Chico:  Yes, but that would be too easy =p
Jason:  It wouldn't make for good reality TV, Mr. King.
Gordon: True, but maybe it would make for good electronic games. Let's get fully loaded.
Chico:  Yes.
Jason:  Hic
Chico:  Speaking of the House of Love that CBS built...

Big Brother is the number one rated website with almost 30% of all TV-related hits, according to Netwise. Number 2: America's Got Talent. Number 3: American Idol.

Gordon: I'm impressed that Idol is #3 and they are not even on.

Number 5: So You Think You Can Dance. 6) Pirate Master (congratulations to Ben, by the way) 7) Power of 10.

Chico:  So out of the Top 7, six are what we would refer to as game shows.
Jason:  We rule. E'nuff said :)
Chico:  Speaking of Ben, time for some hoes! (plays "Pimpin' All Over the World")
Gordon: Want some hoes?
Chico:  Now get on the couch and start casting.
Gordon: Wanna dance?
Jason:  Gotta dance.

ABC is seeking talented female and male amateur singers and dancers for a new six-week live primetime competition series Dance War: Bruno vs. Carrie Ann. Three open auditions are scheduled around the country: September 15 in Nashville; September 22 in Santa Monica; and September 29 in New York City. Dancers and singers of all types are encouraged to audition. Details of exact locations in each city and times can be found at: www.myspace.com/carrieannvsbruno

Gordon: Now perhaps you want to dane for something smaller scale

Lifetime Television and City Lights Television are looking for talented young dancers in the New York City area to appear on a new dance competition show. To apply, click (or copy and paste into your browser) the following link: http://casting.citylightstv.com/AgeWntw-Dancer.htm Include a jpg formatted photo and resume along with name, age, gender, height/weight, clothing size, complete contact information, dance history/style and why you would be a good candidate for the show.

Gordon: What do you got, Chico?
Chico:  Or if dancing's not your thing, and you're Canadian... and you speak French... here's one from our friend Vickers.

The quick back story: Radio Canada is debuting a new game show called "Paquet Voleur" this fall.  Imagine that you got given a random case from a model on Deal or No Deal. You get to look at it and then decide whether you keep it, switch it for a different one or steal someone else's (that you suspect is a high valued one). If you're in the top half of the values at the end of each round, you stay to play another round.  If not, you get to keep the one you've got.

Chico:  I would conjecture that if you tryout details, you could go to the Radio-Canada site.
Gordon: Finally, and you knew this was coming...Nothing But the Truth Auditions!
Jason:  You lie :)

Can you handle the Truth?!?! If you're ready to be completely honest, we WANT YOU! All you have to do is not lie, 21 times in a row…how hard could that be?!? http://www.realitywanted.com/index.php/latest/1596?PHPSESSID=eb0909883ba49ce365bb680b78ef03e3

Gordon: Thanks to our friends at Reality Wanted for that one.
Chico:  Now to some more hoes... and I understand you've got quite a few, Gordon.
Gordon: I've been raking up the hoes

We start with Next Food Network Star winner Amy Finley, who has new new show on October 14, Ex Idol Jared Cotter is now on 'The Sauce' (Its a show people)...Sanjaya wins a Teen Choice award for performer of the year, which should explain where exactly the Sanjaya effect came from...Donny Osmond gets the Identity UK gig, Andy/Tessa's on again off again thing is now off again, but Willa Ford's is on, as whe gets married...Donald Trump Jr. Gets a gun, while the Jessica Sierra trial gets postponed due to rehab...Jesse Palmer (from Chico's FAVORITE show) gets a college football gig on ESPN2.

Gordon: You still watch that show frequently, don't you, Chico?
Chico:  How can I put this... *whap*
Gordon: Ow!
Chico:  Yeah, that'll do :)
Gordon: Im just saving it now, because I know what will happen every time Mark Cuban sticks around for another week on DWTS
Jason:  I will applaud
Gordon: Blech.
Jason:  lol
Gordon: But none of those are the Ho of the Week. The Ho of the Week is....Arthur Joseph.
Chico:  I know about Arthur Joseph.
Gordon: Remember the guy from Trinidad on Deal or No Deal who stopped for a deal which brought a basketball court to Trinidad?
Jason:  Oh him!
Gordon: Well, they just had the dedication of the court this week.
Jason:  I think that was awesome.
Gordon: I thought it was high time that we put up a ho of the week that made the news in a GOOD way.
Chico:  And it was indeed good.
Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Chico:  And that's Brainvision for the season. Shut 'er down... put her back in the hangar.
Jason:  Done
Chico:  We'll have a new game and an old one in a bit, but first, in a first for You Love...We asked what you thought about Big Brother contestants on Power of 10, and the result was an overwhelming... "What are these two people doing stinking up my TV?"
Gordon: How overwhelming was it?
Chico:  Let me put it to you this way...Only one person voted for Daniele. Everyone else voted for stink. EVERYONE.
Gordon: We'd like to thank Big Brother's Nick for reading you Love to Interrupt
Jason:  lol
Chico:  This week, we're talking... Temptation. The question...

Three former American Idol contestants (Justin Guarini, Kimberly Caldwell, and Mikalah Gordon) are playing for charity on Wednesday's preview. Thoughts? I'm watching because they have the Idolists! I'm NOT watching because they have the Idolists! I'm watching DESPITE the Idolists!

Gordon: I'm guessing a similar result this week to last week...
Chico:  Results... next week, of course!
Gordon: Why, Temptation, Why?
Chico:  When we come back... I'm passing out cigars, because a brand new game is born. This is WLTI, celebrating 5 years of Temptation worship.

(Brainvision has been sponsored by Are You Smarter than a Cabbage Patch Kid? They are all grown up and can drive cars (and save money on car insurance) but are they smarter than you?)

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