Gordon: We got the Big Balls for you, right here.
Chico: (plays "Big Balls")
Gordon: Anyways, we are back with the Birthday Boy, Jason Hernandez, and we are
going to play Accuracy or Idiocy. I'm going to give you statements. You are
going to tell me if they are accurate or idiotic. Ready?
Jason B: Got it
Chico: Got it.
Gordon: Ground Control to Major Tom.
Tom: uh, got it
Chico: Bad Beatles reference.
Tom: me have sharp blow to the head
Jason B: Actually that's Rush
Gordon: First one...
We want to see Donald Trump, among others, sing TV show tunes as part of Emmy
Joe: No we don't. Idiocy.
Chico: No we don't. You do, Gordon. Because anything that involves televised
singing gives you the warm and fuzzies.
Gordon: I don't actually. I don't mind the idea, but I don't want to hear the
Donald - or William Shatner
Jason H: Ewwwwww, idiocy!!
Jason B: IDIOCY!
Tom: Does any one remember "Roseanne" and the national anthem? IDIOCY.
Chico: I know no one watches the Emmys, but is this the BEST thing you can do?
Gordon: This would be, by the way, for the Emmy Musical Contest that they are
having to lure eyeballs to the TV screen.
Jason B: About as popular as Rob Lowe singing with Snow White.
Tom: Who knows, maybe the guy can sing?
Gordon: This just looks like a giant train wreck in the making, doesn't it?
Chico: Train wreck, car accident, and surgery all into one.
Tom: Yeah, but America loves a good train wreck.
Chico: Not good television.
Gordon: Kristen Bell ("Veronica Mars") will be the only solo performer, with her
version of the "Fame" theme, while others will sing duets. William Shatner
("Boston Legal") and opera's von Stade with the theme from Shatner's 1960s
series "Star Trek." Megan Mullally ("Will & Grace") and Trump ("The Apprentice")
with the "Green Acres" tune. Gary Dourdan (CSI: Crime Scene Investigation") and
R&B artist Macy Gray with "Movin' On Up" from "The Jeffersons.
Chico: If anything, I will be repulsed...
Gordon: Ok - Next one -
We want to see Todd Bridges and other Celebrities dance wth Ice Skaters on
Skating With Celebrities!
Jason B: 2 for 2---IDIOCY
Chico: Supreme idiocy.
Tom: I'll pass--- IDIOCY
Gordon: Same. Listen kids, if you are going to make a clone, make a
GOOD one that we will WANT to see.
Tom: Unless there's a fall with a compound fracture, who wants to watch skating
Chico: It has three things going against it. a) Celebrities. b) Clonage. c) ...
come on, it's on Fox. Need we say more?
Tom: Hey, we love NewsCorp.
Jason B: No...you love NewsCorp. You are an employee :P
Joe: [Klauss-Gibson detector goes wild]
Chico: Bit the hand that feeds you or something.. If celebs are skating, there
had better be a hockey game orchestrated around it.
Jason H: .......Hmm.... I still think figure skating is boring.....unless
someone gets checked hard into the wall. ERGO....idiocy. =)
Tom: Kinda makes projectile vomiting sound pleasant, doesn't it Jason? Jason H:
Heh, thanks, Tom.
Gordon: The pairs competing are: Bruce Jenner with Tai Babilonia, Dave "Full
House" Coulier with Nancy Kerrigan, Todd "Diff'rent Strokes" Bridges with Jenni
Meno, Kristy "Dude Where's My Car" Swanson with Lloyd Eisler, singer Deborah
Gibson with Kurt Browning and Jillian Barberie with John Zimmerman.
Tom: I thought it was supposed to be celebrities?
Jason H: C and D-list, yes...
Chico: Apparently the definition of celebrity is watered down for TV purposes.
Jason B: Coulier is a hockey player. He can skate.
Joe: Dude, how did Coulier get Nancy Kerrigan?
Jason B: That's a fix right there.
Joe: No kidding'.
Tom: You mean in the biblical sense?
Gordon: Ok, #3...
We want Goldpocket's Trivia Challenge to be a new show on GSN
Jason B: ACCURACY
Jason H: We do, we do!
Joe: ACCURACY! Do NTN while you're at it.
Chico: Oh yeah.
Jason H: Accuracy, and NTN sounds good. ;-D
Gordon: GSN just became forces with Goldpocket due to their gaming. There's been
a rumor floating around that this will open the door to Television Programming -
mainly their annual $500,000 tournament.
Chico: I can go for some NTN right now. And I can go for some Goldpocket.
Tom: It may just be wishful thinking, but maybe GSN will actually return to,
dare I say it, game shows?
Gordon: Perish the thought, Tom.
Jason H: I think one of us should be able to take home a big pot, right guys?
Jason B: Damn right.
Gordon: Next one...
We want to Apply to MTV to get our own reality show.
Jason B: IDIOCY! I am too old for MTV
Gordon: As a Turn It Up contestant, You've already been on MTV. Jason B: Yes,
but when I was on MTV...I was 22...I am almost 38 now.
Chico: IDIOCY. At 25, I too am too old for MTV.
Jason H: ....accuracy, I'm still pretty, as well as pretty young. :-P
Joe: IDIOCY. MTV reality jumped the shark a LOOOOOOOOONG time ago.
Tom: ACCURACY. WE could do reality right.
Chico: I don't really want anyone probing into the psyches of my existence.
That's what makes me, I think.
Gordon: I would do it. I think my life IS interesting enough to be made into a
Joe: So's mine, but I wouldn't air it on MTV.
Chico: If the whole world wanted to be me, I wouldn't appreciate it that much.
Jason H: I SO wish there were cameras around me last night. =D
Tom: I don't think ANYONE wants to see that.
Jason H: Not THAT!
Gordon: I don't. Ack.
Jason B: What were you doing? or more accurately...who were you doing? Jason H:
What : swing dancing. Who : Just about everybody, hence why I'm extremely
Joe: LADIES?!?!?! ANd you didn't save any for ME?!?!?
Jason H: Those ladies wore me out, ya know. ;-D
Gordon: Next one...
I'll go to a casino and plunk down $500 to have a shot to go to Las Vegas for
the World Series of Poker.
Jason H: Accuracy
Jason B: ACCURACY
Tom: Oh yeah, baby!
Chico: ACCURACY, because you have a gambling PROBLEM!
Jason B: What brought this on?
Jason H: as long as we get a....*sings* Profit in our paaaants.....
Gordon: Like me =0)
Jason B: (grumble)
Gordon: We all know about the World Series of Poker. Well, the circuit tours are
already starting up again, and this could be one of the cheaper ways to make
enough money for the $10,000 Main Event entry fee without having to spend 18,000
hours on-line winning poker satellite tournaments.
Jason B: No kidding.
Gordon: For more information on a casino near you and the entry fees on each
event, go to www.worldseriesofpoker.com. Last one...
Though it's in Spanish, we can't wait for the Spanish Version of Press Your Luck
to hit the air in 2006.
Jason B: ACCURACY!
Jason H: ......do you even have to ask me?
Gordon: Well, I did this one for the Birthday Boy =)
Chico: We KNOW you can't wait, J
Tom: Hell, I'm watching "Trato Hecho" and I don't speak more than a few words of
Joe: Accuracy, if only be because Jason H. is happy about it.
Jason H: It's 8:40 am, what do you think is on my TV rightnow?
Gordon: Trato Hecho?
Jason H: :-P No chascos!
Tom: LMAD on Univision
Gordon: A Dancing Entertainment Whammy pop up on Jeff's screen?
Jason H: But of course.
Chico: I'm watching it with my mom. Every day. Good stuff.
Jason H: I still think game shows are doing well, of not just for the Mexican
Jason B: Thanks to host Guillermo Huesca.
Tom: He does a great job.
Chico: Very much so.
Jason H: Guillermo is one of the nicest guys out there.
Tom: Damn right!
Jason H: He's very genuine with the contestants, and you can tell he really
tries in vain not to give away chascos, especially when the previous 3 deals all
Jason H: *chasco horns*
Jason B: STAMP!
Gordon: And that ends Accuracy or Idiocy. When we come back from the break, we
end this season like we end each season before it - a little pushing and
(Brought to you by Extreme Dance Dance Revolution. You have to stay on the
dance pad WHILE people are throwing red balls at you. EXTREME! In this episode,
the L.A. Loogaroos go up against the Carolina Chairmen. Meanwhile, the New York
Blockers will go up against the Kansas City Media Hoes.)
HERE to continue