Tom: Thank you very much, Gordo.
Gordon: My money's on the Loogaroos
Jason H: I'll be on his team. =P
Chico: Dude.. You ever see Nolan Walker on a DDR pad, Carolina Otaku dancers are beasts. That will be a match.
Tom: November sweeps are coming up.
Chico: Good segue, you're learning!
Jason H: Yes, in November!
Chico: It's time once again for Push or Flush, we give you a new show, you critique it by giving it a push or a flush. And next week, how to make toast.
Jason H: wait.... you put BREAD into toast, not toast!
Gordon: Uh...ok. For the record, here is the listings -

Push
Pastry Push - preferred Push, but some reservations
Paltry Push - very weak push
Flush

Gordon: If everyone pushes, then we have a BIG PUSH. If everyone flushes, then we have a CLOG. It used to be a Drano, but Joe Van Ginkel took the copyrights back so we no longer have the Trademark. What's the first show?
Chico: I'm just illustrating how simple it is. First push/flush actually premiered 2 weeks ago.

Ultimate Fighter 2. Fighters go into the Octagon for a chance at a UFC contract.

Joe: Zof-woff-whiff-wofff-PUUUUSH!-PUSSSH!
Chico: Who's ready to work?
Gordon: I do - let's Push it, thought it will be interesting to see if any of them can survive the training, much less the octagon
Tom: Flush it. Please, flush it.
Jason H: Hmm, I'll flush.
Jason B: PUSH
Chico: I said UF would work. I think UF2 will also work. I'm PUSHing, making a 4-2 Push.
Joe: Sorry boys. I have to Push this one.
Gordon: This is going to be the ONLY Reality Show Joe will push.
Joe: :D
Chico: Next one premieres tonight.

It's called "Word Slam'. It's got vocabulary trivia for trivia buffs, documentary storytelling for reality show buffs, and Kimberley Locke for Gordon.

Jason B: Push
Gordon: I'm going to give it a paltry push. I'm very hesitant on the execution, but I'll hope for the best.
Joe: Flush.
Jason H: Eh . . . I'll reluctantly push it
Tom: I have no idea how this'll work, but I'll try anything once-- PUSH
Chico: It's on Saturdays on GSN, which means that it's either really good and aims outside the bound, or it's really bad and GSN wants to bury it.
Gordon: The fact that they slated this for a Saturday night show on GSN greatly concerns me.
Chico: I'm going to give it a pastry.
Joe: ROFL
Chico: So we have three pushes, one flush, and 1 paltry and 1 pastry. So it averages into... a Pastry.
Tom: with a side of cream cheese.
Jason H: Mmmmm....
Chico: Mmmmm Good eatin'. Then comes September 12, with four season premieres.
Gordon: paltry - a 'weak' push
Chico: I like pastry =p
Tom: with a side of cream cheese.

a) Jeopardy! with its improved graphics package... On tap this season, the standard tournies, the continuation of the David Madden reign of terror, and a bonus.. the 5000th episode of J!.

Joe: Paltry. It's Jeopardy!, dammit.
Gordon: Only a paltry push?
Jason B: PUSH!
Tom: Well, of course, PUSH. Although another Friedman tweak isn't needed or wanted.
Chico: I'm going to push. First of all, I love J!. Second, you KNOW where the College Championship is?
Gordon: I'll push it, despit the fact that the tournament is going to be in North Carolina.
Jason H: I'll push it, of course.
Chico: Joe prevents the "BIG" push, but it's still a push.

b) Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?. It's plain Millionaire. Pure and simple. Simple and clean.

Joe: WHEE! Meredith rules! Push!
Chico: Push it real good.
Jason H: New time slot here in la-la land, big push!
Jason H: Oh yeah! ;-D
Tom: Push it hard.
Jason B: PUSH!
Gordon: Hard push here as well
Chico: BIG PUSH! *fanfare* Apparently someone loves Emmy winners.
Gordon: What's C?

c) Family Feud. It's the same Feud, with, according to our good friends at Buzzer, a more Lingo-ish set.

Gordon: Not nuts about the set, but still a good game. A Pastry Push here.
Jason H: Here comes your first flush, guys.
Chico: Here's what they say... "A lot more lights will be added, like some classic style white lights. It's been described as sort of like Louie Anderson Feud."
Tom: Push. It's a classic without a "Pearson TV" makeover. We can't get enough of those.
Gordon: Push the show, Flush the Makeover.
Chico: I haven't seen it, but if it looks any more like the Family Fortunes set than it needs to be... Anyway, I'm going to push.
Jason B: PUSH--I like Feud.
Jason H: I still think US Feud is the skeleton of what Feud should be.
Chico: You know, this is the most debated show on the roster since the Ray Combs era, but the fact of the matter is it's on for seven years. Surely someone's doing something right. You cannot dispute that.
Jason H: Well, with me . . . it's comparing another current version.
Chico: 100 Mexicanos Dijeron, we know.
Jason H: Thanks, Chico. =D
Gordon: The show is a great one, despite people's desires to fix something that wasn't broken.
Jason H: You have the US version, which really doesn't have a family feel to me. And the Mexican version has much more of a homey feel to it.
Chico: And bouncy models. Heh.
Gordon: Next show?
Joe: Flush it. The current Feud jumped the shark a long time ago. Sorry.
Chico: Thanks. Next...

d) Wheel of Fortune. If we go through all the changes being made again, we're going to be here all day.

Jason B: Still pushing.
Joe: Flush. It's sad really.
Chico: I'm going to Flush as well. I don't know who said it, but it's become more or less "Wheel of Stupid People".
Joe: Jeff Suchard did.
Chico: Thanks, Joe.
Gordon: I like my Wheel of Stupid People - it means I can Kick Ass on
it once I get selected as a contestant – Push.
Tom: Push the show, flush the changes. I know Friedman is trying to attract more 18-34s, but are tweaks (except for spandex-clad bimbos) going to change the fact that this is essentially the same game we've watched for the last 30 yrs?
Chico: You have these people who don't know how to play a game that predates itself.
Jason H: Yea, I'll probably go push. Wheel is Wheel is Wheel.
Joe: :-D
Jason H: There's a reason it is still number one in the syndie ratings.
Chico: Yeah, it appeals to the lowest common denominator.
Jason H: *raises hand* HELLO? =P
Chico: Present company excluded.
Gordon: As part of the Lowest Common Denominator, I would like to state that this is one of the best word game shows ever. I'm sorry if some of us on the panel are too sophisticated to realize it. The other 4 (4-2 Push), fortunately, aren't.
Chico: Next...

The Biggest Loser. It's one of NBC's best.. which isn't saying much, but can it pass muster a second time?

Jason H: Nope, flush.
Joe: Flush.
Jason B: FLUSH
Tom: It's been done, and didn't need to be done in the first place. FLUSH.
Gordon: I liked the first one. I'll watch this one, too. Push.
Chico: Well, I think Biggest Loser is going to fall to Swan Syndrome. It'll be victimized by its own success. So I'm going to flush.
Gordon: You have to remember that this is NBC - the 4th placed NBC - we are talking about. Anything that registers better than a 5 will be a hit. I think this show will do that.
Chico: Yeah, but compare it to the first season, and you know...
Gordon: Next?

Made in the USA. It has inventors and Todd Newton. Who do you want to see more of?

Gordon: Lawsuits! Wheeeee!
Joe: Todd Newton.
Jason H: *watching Whammy* What do you think? He's a durable host, I'll push
Joe: I'll give it a paltry push for Todd-o.
Chico: I think our decision has been made. Push.
Jason B: Push. Mild, but a Push.
Chico: I'll amosst forgive Partrige Family if this is any good.
Tom: Push, tentatively.
Gordon: Todd's a good guy. USA has had a history with standing behind it's product - and it has had some very good reality show product like Combat Missions and Nashville Star. I'll overlook Cannonball Run 2000. Push.
Chico: Alright, speaking of quality product, the 11th in a series...

Survivor Guatemala. Will the Bobby Jon/Stephenie twist make people watch? Or is this just fan service?

Gordon: I would be watching, regardless. Push.
Jason B: Push.
Joe: DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Jason H: FLUSH!
Tom: Survivor at any locale--- FLUSH IT.
Gordon: See, you guys are just successful reality show haters.
Chico: I'm going to flush it if only for the casting.
Joe: No, we're LAME reality show haters. :-D
Gordon: And when Survivor stays in the Top 10 - again - I'll come back and make fun of all of you.
Chico: Zero minorities. This ain't a cross section of America. This is a cross section of the casting.
Gordon: Hate the casting directors, not the game.
Chico: I like the game, but I don't think the whole package will be up to snuff. I think we're going to see Thailand all over again. Not a clog, but a flush nonetheless... Meanwhile, fastforward a couple of days and...

Four words. The. Price. Is. Right.

Joe: WHOO PUSH!
Jason B: PUSH in a big way!
Jason H: Push!
Tom: WOO HOO! PUSH!
Gordon: Push, of course
Jason H: The gold standard of all game shows.
Chico: I'm going to flu-PUSH! With the fakeout =p
Tom: BTW, when is the show with Mary airing?
Chico: October 25.
Jason H: 10.25.05
Chico: Set your TiVos accordingly.
Gordon: Big Push Time! *Fanfare*
Jason H: I actually think this season will be better than the past few seasons.
Chico: I agree.
Jason H: Already, there have been some GREAT shows for the upcoming season.
Chico: You've been to a few, I'm guessing.
Jason H: *nods*
Chico: Ah.

Now the show Gordon's been looking forward to: America's Next Top Model.

Gordon: yummmmmmpush
Joe: DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Jason H: Female models, si?
Chico: Si. Push.
Gordon: Claro, Si
Jason H: Yea, push.
Gordon: Joe just has no taste in Reality Game Shows.
Chico: Bad ones. Idol is exempted.
Jason B: Flush
Tom: Do we really need another show about vapid, superficial pretty people? Uh, push.
Chico: At least they're just being vapid superficial pretty people instead of... well, the BB House.
Gordon: Yes, If the vapid superficial people have pretty ass...ets. Apparently, you guys like the assets too, as it goes to a 4-2 Push.
Chico: That same night gives us...

"The Apprentice: Martha Stewart". Does a tycoon by any other name game as sweet?

Jason H: Push.....the flush sound effect!
Jason B: DRANO FLUSH. The biggest bomb of the 2005-2006 season.
Chico: I don't think this is going to pass muster compared to the original Apprentice. Flush, please. Oh, BTW, we have the phrase. "You just don't fit in."
Gordon: I'm going to have to give it a paltry PALTRY push - I will give the show the benefit of the doubt - though I will turn on it very quickly if it's not Apprentice Quality.
Chico: My anklet.
Gordon: Definitely Flush the Phrase 'You Just Don't Fit In'. That in itself sounds like a desperation clone move.
Chico: Personally, I like our phrase... "You suck. GET OUT!"
Gordon: And we've used it before =)
Chico: I can think of a few names.
Tom: Stewart did the crime, must WE pay the penalty? FLUSH. It's reprehensible that they'll give her another show, to capitalize on her prison stretch.
Jason B: They are giving her 2 shows. Not just one.
Tom: They ought to lock up anyone willing to distribute that kind of trash.
Chico: Only Gordon spares the show from a CLOG. So what about...

The original and still the best Apprentice?

Jason B: I Push this. Reality TV Show hall of fame.
Chico: The Donald has come out and said that he didn't like 3, but he's proud of the bunch for 4. And I'm proud of the Donald for being proud of something... No, not really Anyway, I'll push it.
Tom: Apprentice---- got to give it a push, though it's not a "must watch" for me.
Gordon: How can you flush The Donald? Push
Joe: Very easily, Gordon. DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANOOOOOOOOOO!
Gordon: Note to self - Make sure Joe's connection goes bad when we are talking about reality shows on Push or Flush.
Joe: :-D
Jason H: Hmmmm, push reluctantly.
Chico: So it's a push, 5-1, with Joe being the lone dissenter.

Amazing Race Family Edition. Will we pine for the original Race in all its glory?

Jason B: No. AR is AR...big PUSH.
Joe: Flush, only because I don't watch it.
Tom: Kids kill shows. (Bewitched, Mad About You, Married With Children, etc). FLUSH.
Chico: I'm going to paltry this one, simply because I've seen Family
Face-Off before, and... Yeah, what Tom said.
Jason H: Eh......flush.
Gordon: AR is AR - Pastry Push, and then a hope that AR 9 will be the good show that we want it to be.
Chico: So it's a 3-3 Tie. Who wants a pastry?
Tom: Here, Here! With a side of cream cheese.
Gordon: Make mine with lox. I like lox.
Chico: The phrase of the show right there.
Joe: You can have your lox. I'll have a dozen Krispy Kremes.

Three words. Celebrity. Pop. Superstar. Stars want to sing.

Chico: And I want to mute. Flush. There's a reason that NBC passed it.
Jason B: FLUSH!
Jason H: Oh man, BIG FLUSH.
Joe: I'd Push it if Amy Jo Johnson were on there. But she isn't that I know of, so DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAANOOOOOOOOOO!
Tom: I was trying to push this last year. Push it.
Gordon: Can we have the Ashlee Simpson version and have the singers sing over better vocalists tracks?
Chico: That would be even worse.
Joe: No, Gordon, that's the Milli Vanilli version. [Losers]Girl, you know it's true...[/L]
Chico: Ooh, ooh, oooh, you are through.
Gordon: So if I flush, we get a clog?
Joe: ROFLMAO
Chico: No. Tom pushed it.
Tom: Only because I pushed a similar concept last year.
Gordon: Awwww. Flush for me though. Next?

Miss Seventeen. I remember this show when it was called "All-American Girl."

Chico: I flushed it back then, too.
Jason B: And I am Flushing it now.
Joe: Liquid Plumbr this one, folks.
Gordon: What is MTV thinking? Flush.
Tom: Flush it.
Jason H: Flush
Gordon: It's a CLOG! Wheeee!
Chico: One more...

Ryan Cabrera helps songwriters "Score" the woman of their dreams.

Tom: Flush.
Chico: Flush
Joe: Flush.
Jason H: Flush
Jason D: Flush
Gordon: Score one for...another Clog. Flush.
Chico: CLOG! That's Push or Flush. Final Big Finish of the season after this.

(Brought to you by Liquid Haterade, Flushes all bad game shows out of our system. Haterade is first aid, for your broadcast schedule's worst.)

Gordon: Doesn't prevent clogs though.
Joe: ROFLMAO
Gordon: Is my logo on it?
Joe: No, Brian Dunkleman's is.

(Crickets Chirping)

Joe: Okay, that went over like a lead balloon.
Gordon: Ok - it's time for...The Big Finish!
Jason H: Whoo hoo.
Joe: Let's do it.
Chico: Who's next out of the sisterhood of Big Brother? I think Ivette's going home.
Gordon: Who's the most likely to win the money? Ivette, as she has the Friendship's vote AND James. She has to go.
Jason H: Wait for it.....wait for it..... I have a life, I don't watch BB. :-P
Joe: ROFL
Chico: I tell ya, she dropped the ball when she evicted Howie.
Gordon: Nope - she dropped the ball when they let Janelle win HOH. Who gives out more money on the first week of shows - Millionaire or Wheel?
Jason B: Wheel.
Chico: Wheel.
Joe: Millionaire or Wheel? They're gonna give away a million dollars? :-D I have to dissent. I think Millionaire will.
Jason H: Oh, but of course, Joe!
Gordon: I'm going to go with Millionaire - and hope that someone can penetrate the upper echelon of questions.
Chico: I don't think someone will, and even if they do, we already established that they'll risk it rather than walk. Or the other way around or... something. Okay, Who gets the INXS gig?
Gordon: Marty gets it.
Jason H: Um . . . sure.
Chico: The second question, will it see another season?
Joe: Probably not.
Jason H: Nae, sir.
Gordon: I think they could - but they will have to get someone better known in the U.S and the format needs to change from Idol Clone. I note that shows that have bands needing new singers are 0 for 2 this Summer.
Chico: Who would you want to see on Rock Star?
Joe: Van Halen.
Chico: Heh..
Jason B: Now that would be a great Rock Star.
Gordon: I agree with Joe - Van Halen would be an American based band that would bring in much better numbers than INXS
Jason H: I agree.
Gordon: and there's no 'Death' insignia hanging over Van Halen.
Chico: That's also true.
Gordon: Rock Star - Van Halen. It will do numbers. I hope you're reading this, Burnett.
Chico: Okay. Any mail?
Jason H: Any mail?
Gordon: I got mail
Jason H: YAY
Chico: Who's it from?
Gordon: This one's from Patrick Walsh from Virginia.
Jason B: Hey Patrick.
Joe: MAIL TIME! Hiya Patrick.
Gordon: This is about the Foreign Game Show Schedule written up on this week's State of Play.