August 27, 2007

Joe: Oh man
Rob: That's going to be hard.
Jason: Does he have that much?
Gordon: He will if he gets Michael Davies's budget.
Chico: Wouldn't surprise me.
Gordon: Welcome back to the show. We are the guys and here are the heads on a stick.
Rob: hehehehe
Chico: It's everyone's favorite game... ROLEPLAY!
Rob: WOOOOO!
Jason: Yes
Chico: This will be rather easy.  I think we're going to start with... Jason.
Gordon: MWAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA
Chico: Jason... you are Sabra Johnson.
Jason: Female and a winner! Cool.
Chico: I knew you'd love that. Anyway...

You've just been named America's Greatest Dancer. What are you going to do next to cash in on your fortune? Beacuse, you know, we haven't heard much out of Nick or Benji.

Jason: Well of course you know there is the tour I am going on...buy your tickets now of course! And I hopefully, can use my story and my talent to either dance on Broadway, or on a big rock tour. I think America loved my story and I hope I can showcase it to my best effects. And although I have been dancing for only four years...I only can get even better. America, thank you so much for the opportunity! And maybe a bit part in High School Musical 3 wouldn't hurt either.
Chico: Yeah, you know that's coming to theatres, right? That's big time exposure.
Jason: Of course...my jump to the big screen! Why not?
Gordon: Can't wait...not. I've got one for...Joe.
Joe: mew?
Gordon: You are...

Cat Puppet, the long lost puppet that Terry Fator DIDN'T use when he won the million. He used the turtle to win the million and left you in the box. How does that make you feel?

Joe: It feels like there's a darkness surrounding me and my life.....oh wait, that's just the box. See, what you didn't know is that I get 5% of the turtle's stake, so it's all good. He can get all the scrutiny and I'll just sit quietly and get paid.
Chico: As long as he's getting paid.
Gordon: He's worn the Roy Orbison toupee. What toupee do you wear?
Joe: What do you mean? This is my real hair. I'm a friggin cat. I have plenty of it
Gordon: That's all I got. Next one?
Chico: Next up, Rob...
Rob: Yes, Chico?

You are Rock Harper...

Rob: Hell's Kitchen 3 winner.

Correct. You got the W in Hell's Kitchen, but I sense you're not satisfied with that. Part 1) When do we see you on Top Chef?

Rob: No, you'll never see me on Top Chef. One of their better chefs was some chump who did nothing but foam creations.
Chico: HA!
Rob: And if you've seen the last batch of episodes, they really underwhelmed. Their food and presentations were awful. And I wouldn't be caught dead on Bravo. I have bigger aspirations than that.
Chico: Which leads me to...

Part 2) When do we see you on Iron Chef?

Rob: That's the show I want to go on. I've proved to that hard-ass Gordon Ramsay that I can truly cook, now I will prove those people on the Food Network that I can take care of Iron Chef Flay and Morimoto. Once I beat them, then my cuisine will truly reign supreme. It doesn't matter what my critics think. I became the champ on both Hell's Kitchen and soon to be the champ on Iron Chef. If you smell what the Rock is cooking!
Gordon: Oy.
Chico: Yay-YAY =p Okay, Gordon, you're up. And I am ready.
Gordon: Chico...

You are...Joey Fatone.

Chico: Hey! Underrated, I am.

You can sing, you can dance, and you can host game shows. You can also join Lisa Rinna on the Red Carpet...but you still can't get anything as good as the gigs Ryan Seacrest gets. Jealous yet?

Chico: No, man. I'm really proud of what Ryan's accomplished, and you know, who am I to stop him from doing his thing. He's been doing it longer than I have, his star's been up there. I'm just starting out in this gig. I just have to hang in there, you know? I will say this... Was Ryan in the greatest indie film EVER?
Jason: Which was?
Chico: If I may quote my line here... "Hey Ian! We're gonna KILL YA! OPA!"
Jason: Oh yeah, my big Fat Greek Wedding?
Chico: That's the one
Gordon: That's great Joey. Now please explain what the heck you were doing as a host in Fame.
Joe: Oops.
Chico: I didn't know better. They told me it would rock. What the hell was I thinking?
Gordon: Was it the pressure to avoid being in Man Band?
Chico: Hey... Jeff Timmons isn't that bad a guy. So yeah, everything I liked, I liked, and everything I didn't like it taught me, so I have no regrets there...  Unless you count Fame. HA!
Gordon: ok then, What do you got for me?
Chico: Okay, Gordon...

You are Jamie Sadler's Ex. You broke up with your boyfriend right before he became a millionaire... Thoughts?

Gordon: Wellllll, I just was a little upset that Jamie was going to steal my thunder, you know since he made the show and I didn't, but I find that it's much better to not have to worry about the spotlight. My honey-bun can do all the 5am early morning interviews, and press conferences that he wants, but I don't mind being out of the limelight since I loooove him soooo muuuuch, and its nice top be spending his mon...I mean time with him.
Chico: Yeah... but you're broke and he... isn't.
Gordon: Nah. I'm just now the silent type in the background. My honey-woney has the money, and I'm just in the background. Just call me Hilary.
Chico: Whatever you say... in total denial...
Joe: Kanye West on Line 1?
Gordon: Shush. What's the percentage of women who love a sharp dressed and rich man? You do the math. Last one...
Chico: Group exercise?
Gordon: Group exercise
Rob: Sounds fun.
Chico: The All-In Challenge.
Jason: Oh boy
Gordon: Joe, Chico, Rob and Jason...

You're all People auditioning for the next season of America's Got Talent. What talent do you have that will make me want to put you on the show?

Joe: I can make bubbles with my spit.
Chico: Let's see... Me, Eric, Keegan, Arash, Jeff, and Tom are an old-fashioned barber shop... only we groove and we're sexy doing it. Bringing sexy back to the competition.,
Jason: I have a talent for making teams lose by either going to casinos or ball parks.
Chico: It doesn't have to be a legitimate talent, Rob.
Rob: My talent is that I can sing some Bruce Hornsby tunes as well as some Dresden Dolls songs. while I sing like Tay Zonday. CHOCOLATE RAIN! ON THE SHORES OF CALIFORNIA, CHOCOLATE RAIN!
Jason: Hell to the no with the Chocolate Rain.
Rob : THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS WITH THE CHOCOLATE RAIN!
Jason: Stop it...Stop it now.
Gordon: And with that. let's break. We get Heads and Tails after this.

(Brought to you by Temptation Island... You can buy cheesy souvenirs at our amusement parks, but you'll have to answer a few questions first! Just off the 401 split. Open weekends)

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