7: Idol Goes to the Movies
Chico: Welcome to American Idol Theatres.
I'm Chico, and I'll be your usher today. Enjoy the show!.... with a
Gordon: Yo usher boy! More popcorn!
Chico: And some POPCORN!
Gordon: (Hands Usher Boy $10). Keep the change, Jeeves.
Chico: And please... make sure your cell phones are turned... *beep!*
Gordon: And make it snappy! (Threatens to hit Usher Boy with cell
Chico: If I find you with your cellphone... I may have to send my
friend Gordon after you.
Gordon: He will if I don't get my food.
Chico: Thank you for choosing American Idol Theatres. And now, here's
Gordon with a trailer of tonight's Feature Presentation.
Gordon: Don't forget the commercial before the trailer.
(This American Idol preview has been brought to you by Grizzlebeez
Movie Theater Selection. Enjoy some Adam rack of Lambert, along with
an Anoop Desaide of collared greens and finish it off with some Danny
Gokey Lime Pie. Grizzlebees. You'll wish you had less fun!)
Gordon: You always need a commercial before the trailer.
Chico: Ah, right.
Gordon: Now the trailer...7 singers sang. Who performed well? Who
sucked? Who may or may not be saved? Who will be in first place after
the evening? Who will be in the bottom 3? And who will be in the
starring role of suckdom this week? Will Gordon stop asking ridiculous
questions? And who will we select in this week's....
SAFE! TROUBLE! OUT!
ALLISON IRAHETA - I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing
Chico: Now this is odd. We have two people who are untouchable. And
still two more that will be saved. So by elimination... Allison will
be in TROUBLE. She wasn't bad last night, but this wasn't her best.
Jason: While the Song Choice is in her wheelhouse...The breathy voice
in the first half bothered me...and I felt her vocal performance was
all over the place. She didn't hit the money notes. She could be in
big trouble tonight...especially if Adam kills it. TROUBLE
Grandma Pepper: Allison's talent has shone through, no matter the
song. And this opener was a perfect example. SAFE
Gordon: It was a good performance, but someone has to be down there,
and this week, it's Allison's turn. TROUBLE.
ANOOP DESAI - (Everything I Do) I Do It For You
Chico: Remember what I said with Allison? Meet bailout #1. SAFE. He
had a great performance, and praise be... he finally found his balls.
Jason: Anoop had to deliver a huge performance tonight and he did. His
vocals were spot on. And his emotional connection was great. He saved
himself tonight. SAFE
Grandma Pepper: He's working on staying focussed, and has to keep
Gordon: Anoop bailed himself out this week. If he doesn't get out of
the bottom three with that, he's not getting out of the bottom three.
ADAM LAMBERT - Born to Be Wild
Grandma Pepper: Adam was willing to sing. And long may he! SAFE
Chico: It's not as bad as Simon makes it out to be, and it's in his
wheelhouse. Face it, With Adam, you have a case of "If it's Tuesday,
it must be Belgian." SAFE.
Jason: He never fails to disappoint...while this could have been a
flameout...he didn't. Again he has it all. I loved the
arrangement...he was original and fresh and different. Whoa. SAFE
Gordon: Not as good as he has been. It won't hurt him this week
MATT GIRAUD - Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman?
Jason: Matt has a problem tonight. He was just there. This was as
boring and bland as vanilla ice cream. It was just good. Not great.
And especially after Anoop killed it. TROUBLE
Grandma Pepper: Like I said last week, unless he keeps the momentum
Chico: Umm... Matt is having a bit of an identity crisis. He doesn't
know whether to rock it out or soul it out or Anoop it out... So he's
just going to be... OUT.
Gordon: 3 R&B singers is too many, between Matt, Anoop and Lil. One of
them has to go. I'll pick the one with the worst performance, and that
would be Matt. OUT.
DANNY GOKEY - Endless Love.
Chico: Good. Would've been great if he picked the right song..."When
You Believe", anyone? "I Believe I Can Fly" anyone?
Gordon: Do we really need him singing another song made famous by a
Jason: Very good song choice. And his voice sounded like Michael
McDonald and he hit the money notes. I liked this a lot. SAFE
Chico: A guy can sing "When You Believe"
Grandma Pepper: I think it was brave of Danny to sing that song. And
kudos to him for what he did with it. SAFE
Gordon: I think what he did at the end, when he looked up to heaven in
a silent tribute to his passed wife, was genius. SAFE.
Chico: Wow. I didn't even notice that.
Gordon: Not everything has to be done for artistic merit.
Chico: Alrighty then.
KRIS ALLEN - Falling Slowly
Jason: This song won the Academy Award for Best Song in 2008. This is
going to put Kris Allen in the bottom three. Combine a self-indulgent
choice with a bad performance and a song no one knew...you have
Grandma Pepper: Thank heaven his choice was better tonight, because
Kris CAN sing. SAFE
Chico: Once... in a while, there's a song choice that makes you say...
"What?" He can sing, but again... wrong song. TROUBLE
Gordon: He nails the money notes. I don't think it's enough for him to
avoid seeing the bottom three for the first time. TROUBLE.
LIL ROUNDS - the Rose
Jason: Finally we have the Lil Moment we have been waiting for. This
was big, and she sang loud and proud. Love the arrangement and R&B
tinge to it. SAFE
Chico: Meet bailout #2. If she doesn't get saved from last week's
bottom 3, then her fanbase isn't as strong as it once was. SAFE.
Grandma Pepper: Not her best night! Too bad, I had great hopes for Lil.
Gordon: She should be in the bottom 3. She really should be, but I
think her fanbase saves her from that mess. SAFE.
Chico: So let's review....
Grandma Pepper: Trouble: Anoop, Lil. OUT: Matt.
Jason: Trouble: Allison/Matt OUT: Kris
Chico: Trouble: Allison, Kris. OUT: Matt.
Gordon: Trouble: Allison/Kris OUT: Matt
Gordon: I feel good about Matt this week, Chico. You know why?
Chico: Why is that?
Gordon: #1. Grandma Pepper said Matt. #2. Jason said Kris.
Chico: Ah. Think we should all feel good about Matt. Okay... CAN YOU
DIG IT!!!! It's SHOWTIME!
Chico: The votes are in... so are Miley Cyrus... and Jennifer Hudson!
The judges save is still live.
Gordon: The Ford Commercial is in - and it's singing Idols on magazine
Chico: The song, "Freeze Frame"... Ah, J. Geils. And following that...
another movie song..."Maniac" (Footloose)
Gordon: And now it's time for the too perfect concert performance.
This week's Lip Synched Song: Maniac by Michael Sembello.
Chico: Actually, G... It's sung live. And I'll tell you right now... I
think I would've preferred it lip sunc... err, synched... or soemthing.
Gordon: (Watches Anoop flub a line)...you're right.
Chico: It doesn't get any better. Ladies and gentlemen... the UNC
Gordon: It will get much worse for 3 of the singers.
Chico: But which three? We'll find out, but first...
Gordon: ...it's Idol contestant time. Adam says that Quentin lets the
music determine how he shoots movies. Allison talks about the premiere
of a movie that they went to. No, not Inglorious Bastards, but 17
Chico: That would be the new movie with Zac Efron. (mock) He's
Gordon: You mean the Zac Efron in the crowd tonight?
Chico: Yeah, that Zec Efron. I'd tell you to go see "17 Again", but
that would reinforce the stereotype that Zac Efron can act.
Gordon: And all the Idols loved it. Adam liked the cheerleaders. Sure
you did, Adam.
Chico: Q in the BG: "He can't f'ing sing either! All he can do is comb
Gordon: And Lil makes fun of Danny.
Chico: Zac in the crowd rocking the beanie.
Gordon: Time to make a bottom 3.
Chico: Starting with Allison. Paula thought she had special sauce.
Simon says she was the girls' only hope.
Gordon: The audience thought - she was special also. Allison is safe.
Chico: DING! Next up... Adam Lambert.
Gordon: Adam loves the Rocky Horror Picture Show, but you knew that if
you saw his internet pics.
Chico: Paula says he's the bravest. Simon liked the vocals, but the
package reminded him of Rocky Horror. Is he Dr. Frankenfurter?
Gordon: He is...safe.
Chico: But IS HE DR. FRANKENFURTER?
Gordon: I would think he'd be Janet :P
Chico: Anoop Dog is next. Randy says he's in the zone.
Gordon: I sense bad things in Anoop's future.
Chico: Kara says it's his best to day. What's the record for
consecutive bottom three survivals? Because so far Anoop is at 3.
Anoop just made bottom three AGAIN tonight.
Gordon: Nikki McKibbin is the only person who survived 4 weeks in a
row. Syesha Mercado has the most trips in the bottom without being
eliminated - 5.
Chico: We've got a treat. An international superstar. An Oscar winner.
A Grammy winner. A native Chicagoan. And it all began on American
Idol. She starred in Dreamgirls, where she won an Oscar. She released
a CD last year, and she won a Grammy for it. And now she's going back
to where it began five years later. Ladies and gentlemen, performing
"If This Isn't Love"... Please welcome home... Jennifer Hudson!
Gordon: Decent song. She looks great
Chico: Sounds awesome. Just proves that you don't have to win the
title to be a winner.
Gordon: Nope. It's a showcase of your talent
Chico: And she's got talent. She'll be touring with Robin Thicke...And
she's also engaged... and she won't give us a date. Meanie. Back to
business as Ryan sits with Anoop. Anoop's a little frustrated. But in
the end, he doesn't vote. The judges dont' vote. It's all about
America. Paula's surprised. Simon... not so much.
Gordon: Simon says he should be there.
Chico: It's season 8, nothing surprises Simon anymore.
Gordon: Kris and Lil stand up.
Chico: Kara thought Kris was at his best, but the perfromance NEVER
caught on with Randy.
Gordon: SImon thought it was brilliant.
Chico: This is him takling tonight. Simon thought the song was too
soft for Lil. Paula thought it was beautiful. Lil says... in so many
words... she can't win. I say she can't win because she's not trying
hard enough. But that's just me.
Gordon: Lil is complaining abut the judges - that never helps a cause.
Chico: No. Now one of them is safe. The other... bottom three.
Chico: Kris... is SAFE.
Gordon: And complaining won't help tonight. Lil is back in the bottom
three. Kris is safe once again. Chico: This is #2 for Lil.
Gordon: Finally, it's Matt Vs. Danny. Can we put Matt in the bottom
now without Ryan saying it?
Chico: We can. But we have to give the whole spiel here, you know?
Matt tried to do too much.
Gordon: Danny wanted to pull the song back and give it a different
Chico: Now one of THESE two in the bottom.
Gordon: Randy and Kara tell Danny that unlike Simon, they thought he
worked it out.
Chico: Again, them talking tonight.
Gordon: And this time...Matt gets to hang out with Lil and Anoop.
Chico: So your bottom three.. Anoop, Lil, and MAtt.
Gordon: Kara is asked if this is the right 3 to be in the bottom. Kara
says yes and Paula says there were flaws in each of their
performances. Continuing in the competition...Anoop.
Chico: *fart* Lil and Matt in the bottom two. We'll find out who will
sing for their life... BUT FIRST..
Gordon: It's The Dry Ice Band!
Gordon: Could we possibly put more Dry Ice on that stage?
Chico: Nah, not really.
Gordon: It's Miley Cyrus...giving far and away the worst performance
on the American Idol stage this week.
Chico: Singing "The Climb" from "Hannah Montana: The Movie".
Gordon: You want pitchy and nasally? THAT'S pitchy and nasally.
Chico: Study this tape, future contesti...This is what you DON'T want
to do. Permission to not comment about this any more.
Chico: Okay, now to Lil and Matt. Two more weeks to use the save. Will
we use it tonight? Simon says that there's ONE that he would consider
Gordon: If not, they could use it next week - but that's it.
Chico: Red screen on... Judgment time. The person who will now be
forced to sing for their life... after 36 million votes cast...
Gordon: ...is Matt. Everyone called it except Jason, who picked
someone not in the bottom 3. Do you save him?
Chico: After last night... no. If I'm being honest... over the last
six weeks... He's too inconsistent to continue.
Gordon: No, for 2 reasons. #1. This was just as bad as last week. #2.
You have to keep it to save Danny or Adam.
Chico: And Kara and Paula... SIT DOWN OR I'M COMING OVER THERE.
Gordon: And he's still pitchy.
Chico: And he has breathing issues.
Gordon: We have a loud Matt contingency this evening. So where was
that contingency last night?
Chico: Good question. I don't know. Let's go to the table.
Gordon: Matt's been in the bottom twice. Simon says that he doesn't
see Matt having a chance to win the competition.
Chico: And here come the boos. "We've made a decision... Matt... It's
good news." SAVE GET...On MATT? Guy who doesn't know whether he's
Justin Timberlake or Justin Lee Hawkins? THAT MATT?!
Gordon: Keep in mind that Matt got in Via a Wild Card selection to
begin with. I don't know what the judges were smoking or if they were
influenced by the crowd.
Chico: Or each other.
Gordon: I do know this. Next week is Disco Night.
Chico: I doubt he survives next week for two reasons given by Simon.
1) Two people go home. 2) It's disco. Disco helps people with a little
bit of dirt on them. Because it's dirty, it's sexy... You have to be
willing to get a little rough to knock it out. You can't be clean.
Gordon: It helps the R&B singers - Lil, Anoop and Matt. All 3 people
who were at the bottom.
Chico: I think it's going to hurt Kris, and I think it's going to hurt
him a lot.
Gordon: I don't think it hurts Kris as much as it hurts Allison
Chico: Well consider this... It helps the three R&B singers. Danny &
Adam... untouchable up to this point.
Gordon: I think the judges are taking a gamble that since Anoop and
Lil were in the bottom for the past 2 weeks, they will stay in the
bottom and be eliminated when the Pro Matt people come to bail him
Chico: That just leaves Allison and Kris.
Gordon: That's a very dangerous gamble, because Disco Week has always
killed a rocker.
Chico: We'll see if their gamble pays off or if someone less deserving
goes. Adam needs to maybe put on a glam rock show. It's about as disco
as rock gets.
Gordon: They all need to bring their A game next week.
Chico: And until next week.... a point to remember... there's always a
Hollywood plot twist. Something always has to go wrong ONCE before you
get to the happy ending... now little over a month away.
Gordon: This is a recipe for disaster next week. What happens if...and
I just say if...Dnny and Adam are both at the bottom? Then someone's
going to cry BS.
Chico: Remember... EVERY VOTE COUNTS NOW. I think that saving Matt was
a BIG mistake.
Gordon: Huge. Tactical. Error.
Chico: Does not compute.
Gordon: Speaking of compute, here's the standings:
Grandma Pepper: 28
Chico: Will it compute next week?
Gordon: They better hope the votes stay the same - or that Lil and
Anoop do not have a breakout night.
Chico: While we watch that. You come back. Remember to support your
local singers, and until next time... the balcony is closed.
footage from this episode, visit the
official website at