November 12, 2005

Chico: Hosted by Mos Def?
Gordon: We can do Rapping Cards - but no dragons.
Chico: He's actually a good poet. Ever see the Converse commercial? "Before Mr. Taylor taught the world to play" and all that?
Gordon: Ok - next up is our favorite game of family called Who's Your Daddy! Today, however, it's going to be called Who's Your Mommy!
Chico: Explain.
Gordon: Well, first, can I have a Big Board?
Chico: Sure.
Gordon: Let's talk about host comings and goings. Care to mention a few, Chico?
Chico: Coming: Howie to Deal or No Deal.  Going:... Jeff Probst?
Gordon: Rumor has it that Mr. Probst will be leaving after Survivor 12. Another specific rumor - the person who will be replacing Jeff is going to be a female - a female who has played Survivor.
Doug: Oh... puh-LEEZE... not Sue Hawk!
Brian: Let's hope not.
Chico: God no
Gordon: So, as common place here, I'll give you a list of females, and you rank them on who you would like to see be the new host.
Chico: Alrighty.
Don: Okay, then.
Gordon: And fortunately, Joe isn't here to say that Survivor isn't Teh Suck. So let's start with....

Sue Hawk

Gordon: You can't have a Survivor list without Sue Hawk
Chico: As far from the bottom as possible. But yeah.
Gordon: I bet you I can find someone worse than her to host it.
Chico: Is that a challenge?
Gordon: Sure =)
Doug: Is that possible? Someone worse that Sue?
Don: We'll see, I guess...
Gordon: What about... Ghandia!  Aaaaahahahaoaouaaghghghghaaaaaaa (Primal Scream)
Doug: My wife says she came from the worst season of Survivor ever.
Chico: I echo that... But I'd rather see her than Sue.
Don: If I had to choose either Gandhia or Sue, I'd pick Ghandia.
Doug: Well, the lesser of two evils. Ghandia.
Gordon: Chico?
Chico: Ghandia
Gordon: ok, so we have....

Ghandia > Sue

Gordon: Let's get some better candidates up there, shall we? Starting with Tina Wesson. First female Survivor Winner. She's a cutie. Will she get you to watch?
Doug: Eh, not a bad choice.  Can do better, though.
Chico: True. Put her at the top until you can find someone better.
Don: She'd be better than the first two.
Gordon: ok, so we have...

Tina > Ghandia > Sue

Chico: She's got Wessonality.
Brian: I think Tina will get me to watch.
Gordon: What about the one media ho that actually got a full time gig? That would be Elisabeth Hasselbeck, who is a woman of The View. Is this a good transition for her?
Chico: Top of the list. Although ABC prolly won't have it. All Our Ms. Hasselbeck are belong to us, they'll say.
Don: Yeah, right at the top.
Doug: Top of the list.  She's been in front of the camera between The View and ... that show on style. (forget the name)
Chico: The Look for Less, now hosted by Top Model 2 winner Yoanna House
Gordon: ok - so we have...

Liz > Tina > Ghandia > Sue

Gordon: Continuing Chronologically, we have Vecepia Towery, the winner of Survivor 4. This would also be the first African American female to helm a Big 4 Network reality show. Are we ready for that?
Chico: I think we're ready. Give her a shot above Tina.
Don: Between Liz and Tina.
Doug: Vecepia... my wife says... Miss I'm Staying Out Of Drama, Myself?
Gordon: That's the one.

Liz > Vecepia > Tina > Ghandia > Sue

Gordon: Next one...Kathy Vavrick O'Brien. This is the woman that many people said should have won survivor, and maybe has the best personality. Could she cut it?
Doug: Oh yeah. (The wife agrees!)
Chico: I say so. Above Vee, please.
Brian: I'm going with the first one.
Don: Below Liz, above V.
Gordon: So we have...

Liz > Kathy > Vecepia > Tina > Ghandia > Sue

Gordon: Next one - Jenna Morasca. She won Survivor 6 - and she got naked for a little chocolate. Would she be titillating enough for your screen?
Chico: Yes!
Brian: Yes!
Chico: And the likelihood is greater as she is a free agent. Top of the board, ma!
Doug: Heh. I bet in every scene, she'd be in swimwear.
Gordon: Where does Jenna go?
Don: Hmm... Above Liz.
Doug: I'd place her 3rd.
Gordon: 2 against 1. Sorry, Doug.

Jenna > Liz > Kathy > Vecepia > Tina > Ghandia > Sue

Gordon: Next up - Amber! She's on 2 Editions of Survivor AND The Amazing Race - and a wedding show. Is she the next Survivor Hostess?
Chico: I'd watch... and hope that Rob wouldn't put out a hit.
Don: Sure, why not?
Brian: I'm voting on "yes"!
Gordon: Where does Amber go?
Chico: Below Jenna... because I've seen her before... Actually below Elisabeth. Man.. I'm torn. I'm so torn.
Doug: I'd place her first... instant name recognition.
Don: Hmm...: I'm not sure whether to say above or below Jenna.
Brian: Go above.
Don: Alright, then. Above.
Gordon: ok then -

Amber > Jenna > Liz > Kathy > Vecepia > Tina > Ghandia > Sue

Gordon: Next up...Julie Berry! Could the whole relationship thing actually be a smokescreen for Julie to be the hostess?
Chico: There's a thought!
Don: Interesting...
Chico: Another Mark Burnett-style twist.. Devious. I say below Amber.
Doug: Sorta defeats the purpose for Jeff wanting to depart, doesn't it?
Chico: Well, yeah, but it would make sense.
Gordon: Maybe Jeff becomes a contestant? But seriously, where do you put Julie?
Don: I'm thinking below Jenna, but above Liz. But that's probably just me.
Doug: I'd slot her between Liz and Kathy.
Chico: Amber & Jenna... but it averaged out to Jenna & Liz, so...

Amber > Jenna > Julie > Liz > Kathy > Vecepia > Tina > Ghandia > Sue

Gordon: Finally, the last person, which is always a wild card....
Doug: Shiiann?
Gordon: Omarosa! Probably the most famous of Burnett's women. Does she get a slot?
Doug: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don: Ack.
Doug: I'd rather have Sue than Omarosa.
Chico: Well... you did it.. You found someone worse than Sue.  *applause*
Don: Below Sue. Way below Sue.
Gordon: I always accept a challenge, Chico =)

Amber > Jenna > Julie > Liz > Kathy > Vecepia > Tina > Ghandia > Sue >>> Omarosa

Chico: I'd rather see Joe host Survivor than Omarosa.
Don: XD
Gordon: Shii Ann is a very good choice too, in my opinion, and there are many other females who would be good, which just goes to show the strength of this franchise.
Chico: Okay, one more commercial, then we're going to bed. We'll be back.

(Brought to you by RockTrax, on Rock104 Hattiesburg every Sunday... hey, we have the dude on the show. The LEAST we can do is throw in a plug)

Gordon: Yay, dude!
Doug: Thank you!
Chico: No Doug... Thank you.
Doug: BTW, Cindy wants to weigh in on potential former male contestants as Survivor hosts. Immediately, she thought of Varner.
Chico: He's got work. Sorry, Cindy.
Gordon: If Cindy wants to join us next week, we'll do a male host one just for her.
Doug: Where? He's not on TV Guide.
Gordon: And I am serious - we'll do it.
Doug: OK.
Chico: He works on Fox 8 in Greensboro.
Doug: Oh, now I remember.
Gordon: We all thank Doug for being here as we go to The Big Finish! Survivor - who's next?
Chico: Well, Bobby Jon went this week, why not finish the job?
Doug: Danni.
Gordon: I don't think they finish the job because now they can boot one of the majority and still have a majority. I think they do it (aka Survivor 2) and I think that Jamie may have problems.
Chico: But that won't happen. Now that Gary's got the Insta-Idol, Danni is an endangered species. Who's going home on But Can They Sing? ... or should they just start all over from scratch?
Gordon: I'd rather be seeing But Can They Play Monopoly - but I think that Larry Holmes has sang his last note.
Chico: Bai Ling will stay around only for eye candy... Ain't that right?
Brian: You bet.
Don: Sounds about right to me.
Gordon: I'll vote for her to win the whole thing - she's easily the most entertaining one out there.
Chico: Well, let's get right into the viewer mail then.
Gordon: Do you have mail?
Chico: I have two mails with the same answer. First one: Meredith Abreu. Thanks, Meredith!

Chico: The second one is from Peggy Hyatt. Thanks, Peggy!

Chico: Well, ladies, thanks for writing.
Brian: It's Klauss Mail Time! But he ain't here.
Chico: Here's what you go... Go to ClassicGameShows.com and click on the Trading Post. Someone's gotta have those episodes on tape. Negotiate a trade, post specific details, and watch the goodness flow forth.
Gordon: Very cool. I have some mail, too.
Chico: Go, Gordon!
Gordon: This is from Andy Nicholls, the first letter that we have ever gotten from the UK, I believe.
Chico: Cheers, mate!

Gordon: We are referenced in Wikipedia, by the way. I sent Andy some more information to what he had there. It's great to be used as a reference. Thanks a lot, Andy! Any More Mail?
Chico: Hold on.. I think I have one more from Jason Wuthrich.

Chico: Gordon? Who ya got?
Gordon: I got good old NYC, my home town - and any team with Tyrone Rush is dangerous.
Chico: I also have the Bling. Sorry, LA. Mario Lopez ain't doing nothin' for ya. But you can do something for us, like e-mail! The address is wlti@gameshownewsnet.com. We're done for fun, y'all! Big thanks to Doug Morris for stopping by. And big thanks to Cindy Morris for ... uh, helping.
Doug: Thanks. Great to be with ya'll. :-)
Chico: For Brian Moore, Don Harpwood, Alex Davis, Joe Van Ginkel, and every ladies' man here at Game Show Newsnet, I'm Chico Alexander... Fathers, be good to your daughters.
Gordon: And I'm Gordon Pepper, wishing everyone a happy Game Over! Don't forget to spread the love to the veterans as well.
Doug: Good night, everybody!
Brian: And now...girls jumping on trampolines!
Gordon: Whee!