April 9, 2007

Jason: OH MY GOODNESS! ROTFL
Gordon: That's on behalf of the Jewish homies.
Chico: Happy Passover, BTW :-) Welcome back. You guys look like you could use some game-show related swag for Passover.
Jason: Oh yeah!
Chico: Unfortunately, none of these exist... but they could. Because it's time for Excessories, where we figure out the ideal tie-in for shows, people, things, ... whatever.
Jason: LOL
Chico: For example...

What would be the best product tie-in for... Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?

Jason: A Dunce Cap. Logoed of course.
Chico: With the orbiting apple on top?
Jason: Yes.
Chico: Any thoughts, Gordon?
Jason: And Maybe a pencil box or school kit?
Gordon: I think the Jeff Foxworthy Red Neck Calculator would do just fine. Of course, there's no buttons higher than 5, but that's ok, because Rednecks can't count that high
Chico: And it fits.. in the pencil box.
Jason: There you go.
Chico: So that's an excessory. The Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader Pencil Box... with Redneck calculator with only five buttons.
Jason: Sounds cool.
Chico: Next?

It's the simplest game in the world - The Check Game. Please help give an accessory for people to figure it out

Chico: A quill with a built in calculator.
Jason: A Waterman Blank Check Fountain Pen
Chico: With a reminder... "You're writing the check for CASH... which added to the price of the (BLANK)... adds up to between $5000 and $6000. I'm beginning to think that should be a class offered at the university level.
Gordon: What about a free Staples button at the end to each winner. 'That was Easy'
Chico: Of course! Now explain to us how you did it.. Stunned silence.
Jason: You got it.
Chico: Followed by a stifling "I don't know..." Okay, next up...

Lingo premiered its sixth season, the first GSN original to achieve that... How do we celebrate?

Chico: I got it... dropping red balls off of the Empire State Building.
Jason: NO!
Chico: ... The Transamerica pyramid?
Jason: How about an Oxford English Dictionary.
Gordon: Sure - you would get real red splotches on the ground
Chico: Free boxes of Raisin Bran Crunch with Chuckles and Shandi on the box?
Jason: LOL sure
Chico: And crunchy red balls.
Jason: Yummy.
Gordon: Frosted Lingo Charms
Jason: They are T-A-S-T-Y
Chico: Nummy. Next?

We need some sort of comfort to those poor souls who lose $100,000 on Wheel of Fortune. What do you suggest?

Jason: Head-On...Apply Directly to the Forehead. Head-On Apply Directly To The forehead
Chico: Once is plenty, thank you. Activ-On... applied directly to where it hurts. Like the wallet.
Gordon: I think they need some sort of Rehab Treatment - just like Britney was in.
Jason: You mean, check in check out check in check out and all that.
Chico: Yeah, good luck with that... Okay, here's an old-school favorite..

American Gladiators... they just resurfaced thanks to ESPN Classic showing reruns.

Jason: Inflatable Lance Sticks
Chico: Dude... tennis ball cannons.
Jason: Oh yeah. Those were hot
Gordon: I'm looking at it from a different angle.
Jason: Try us
Gordon: What about making the Deal Or No Deal Models wear the skimpy spandex the next time they come out to display the cases? I don't know about you, but I'd love to see Leyla in the Zap outfit
Chico: Deal.
Jason: Deal.
Gordon: Pervs ;-)
Chico: That was rather rude. :-)
Jason: Accurate, but wrong.
Gordon: Last one...

Heather Mills's leg. Yes, we have to go there.

Chico: Sorry, I'm thinking about giving that the Grindhouse treatment.
Jason: so am I . Machine gun
Gordon: Would her dancing on a Machine Gun leg make her any better?
Jason: no
Chico: No. If anything, I'd probably be a little more scared.
Jason: knowing her, she would use it to Shoot Paul.
Gordon: Scary thought. That ends excessories
Chico: Yep. Coming up next, one person has a British accent and the other dons a dress in Paula vs. Simon. Keep it locked.

(Brought to you by Canadian Gladiators. 12 lumberjacks take on any and all comers in a quest for the Golden Axe... no, not that golden axe....)

CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE