February 12, 2007
Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and...Chico, you'll never guess what I found
in my mailbox this week.
Chico: What did you find in your mailbox receptacle?
Gordon: A Swifter!
Chico: Today... if we're talking broomball... it must be sweeps.
Joe: A glass of brandy? No, wait, that's a snifter.
Mike: It's not swift, it's swifter.
Chico: From somewhere in America... WLTI Broomball... is on!
Chico: What's good friends, alongside Gordon Pepper, Mike Klauss, Don Harpwood...
and the RETURN of a legend, the Game Show Man Joe Van Ginkel, I'm Chico
Gordon: We start with saluting a man named Larry.
Chico: Our sweeps spectacular begins with... the last man standing. Imagine for
one moment... you had two Millionaire champions...Two Jeopardy! champions... A
nun... and a poker pro in the same building.
Mike: Sounds like a Game Show Congress, coming this July to LA.
Joe: We hope.
Chico: Anyways, the game that's usually simple was far from it this week. First
off, one person out of the 100 was randomly chosen to face the other 99. That
person... poker star Annie Duke. She would play the game completely straight. No
money amounts... No help. And she couldn't bail out at any time, which made her
a nervous wreck. Uncommon for a poker player.
Joe: No kidding. But then this was a different situation than what she's used
Chico: Oh yeah.
Don: The only advantage she seemed to have is that she could take her time with
Chico: Among the questions she was posed... and this is an example of how hard
the material was.
Which has more stories?
A) The Chrysler Building
b) The Transamerica Pyramid
c) The complete works of Stephen King
Chico: Mob, please answer now.
Gordon: I dq myself because I saw the show. However, I did get the answer right.
Don: I saw it, too.
Mike: I don't know why you guys are stumped on this one. The Rich List had a
question about Stephen King's works. The list of possible answers was 3 or 4
Chico: Like anyone remembers that :-)
Mike: I did. :-P
Chico: Well, in any event, correct answer: C. Now, Annie was one of 5 people
left when the bottom fell out. Let me cue up my box here...
Who has been married the most number of times?
a) King Henry VIII
b) Larry King
c) King of Pop Michael Jackson.
Chico: Among the four people left in the mob: Ken Jennings and a guy named
Don: When I saw it, I was thinking B, knowing that Larry King had been married
plenty of times.
Chico: I too was thinking B... Larry King was married 7 or so times. And
everyone but Larry Zerner gets it wrong. And the show pays a cool $250,000.
Gordon: Congratulations to Larry, who outlasted 100 very intelligent people to
Chico: Execution wise, this was probably as close as you could get from the best
way to do it without one little bit here... Now, if I were Scott St. John... at
the risk of being labeled unoriginal, I would've gone with a Fastest Finger
Gordon: Add the bailout and remove the option to quit to the civilian version of
the show and you have a near-perfect show. We end the show with Raul Torres, who
has to deal with 5 paparazzi and 7 Hawaiian Tropic girls,
Joe: I take the Hawaiian Tropic girls. :D
Gordon: He gets through the first 27 mobsters, but if you see NBC spoil the
show, he gets up to $253,000...but does he go all the way? Find out on Friday.
Don: Should be a good one.
Chico: Meanwhile, over on that other big money game show that NBC likes to air,
we get the continuation of Vicki Monzingo's game. Gordon... you're allowed one
short joke, and one short joke ONLY this week.
Joe: WHOO MAGIC JOHNSON!
Mike: Someone cue up Randy Newman's "Short People"...
Chico: That was last week, Mike.
Chico: Catch up :-)
Gordon: Match Game Style: Vicky and Magic Johnson are having an affair. That's
because Magic has a hickey on his (blank)
Chico: Must... resist... urge... to give... Nell Carter answer.
Joe: You mean a Vicki Lawrence answer, Chico.
Mike: Do it. Sister Rose will show you where the confessional booth is located.
Gordon: if you saw the Ross Shafer version of Match Game '90, the correct answer
was Knee. If you watched the Match game Michael Berger version, the answer is
Chico: But yeah, her game ends in a $48,000 deal after a pep talk from Magic
Gordon: Which was the correct thing to do, because she would have found the
$750,000 on her next selection. She makes a good deal, as she only had $50.
Chico: And she had eight cases in play, meaning that Vicki's game is technically
the shortest game of DoND on record in the US.
Gordon: Good job, Chico
Chico: ... wait, I just realized what I said just now.
Joe: Took him a minute, didn't it?
Chico: Welcome to the dark side... yeah.
Gordon: Would you like some Haterade, Chico?
Joe: Gordon's gonna turn Chico into a vampire. He has Haterade running through
Chico: Next up, a crazy dude by the name of Giuseppe Iannello. He played for $2
Joe: Papa Giuseppe.
Mike: The Italian stereotype
Chico: Well, he makes mention of "Affari Toi", which of course is the Italian
version of the show... And its host makes a special appearance via satellite.
Gordon: How do you say Sweeps in Italian?
Joe: Pepperoni and Sausage :D
Chico: "Esweep"... don't hold me to that. Papa Giuseppe ended up with
$127,000.... he had $100,000. I suppose while we're still riding the worldwide
Deal tip...Sunday was the premiere of DOND Canada...
Chico: Which is just like the American version... only it has loonies and
Joe: And Howie, too, IIRC.
Chico: Kee-rect. Don, perhaps you can give us some insight?
Don: Well, with the board, to make room for the toonie, they took out the
Chico: But other than that, it's identical. Right?
Joe: Wait, a toonie?
Joe: Oh. :D
Mike: A tiny toonie.
Joe: "We're a all a little loonie."
Mike: hahahahaha. You're a plucky duck, Joe.
Joe: (No Buster Bunny jokes, please.)
Gordon: How loonie were the contestants?
Don: These contestants were rather excited, especially the second one. She was
Chico: Well you'd be excited too if you were watching the big show and finally
got a chance to play it.
Don: Anyway, the first one, Brian, took a $109,000 deal for his $400 case.
Joe: Good deal.
Don: He had 6 cases left, including $750,000. It turns out, though, that he
could have gone another few rounds before knocking that big one out. The offer
would have gone as high as $268,000.
Chico: That's a spicy meatball.
Don: But still, yeah, a good deal.
Chico: What was the audience response, you know?
Don: Big. Really big. Like, so big, that Canada's Case Game had to run for
another hour due to the huge response there.
Don: Yep. As for viewers... 2.7 million of them.
Gordon: Which is HUGE.
Chico: That's pretty hefty.
Joe: A HUGE deal.
Chico: Mike's favorite had the two cents.
Mike: My favorite?
Mike: Giggity. Even though I'm more of an Ursula fan now. Seeing her in-person
at a taping...yowza.
Joe: I'll take #1, #7 and #9. :D
Mike: You guys could've had the Ursula experience but nooooooo, you had to move
a mattress to Travis Schario's pad.
Mike: I need a cold shower.
Gordon: Would you settle for a cold campsite?
Mike: No deal! *closes case on Gordon's fingers*
Gordon: Ow! That hurt, biotch!
Chico: Well, while Gordon nurses MORE wounds, we have another premiere to talk
about. A Survivor so gritty, one of the players quit before the game even began.
Don: I guess that's why the contestant count was 19, right?
Gordon: Yep. Note to Contestant Coordinators: when a contestant has a history of
panic attacks, selecting her to be on an island with limited supplies for 39
days may not be such a bright idea.
Joe: Do I have repeat myself? Survivor = teh suck.
Mike: Preach on, Brotha VG
Chico: This particular iteration of suck had the same twist currently being
employed by sister show The Apprentice. That of win = good life, loss = hard
life. Am I the only one thinking that Mark Burnett might have run out of good
ideas if he's using the same idea twice... and simultaneously?
Mike: What equates to "good life" and "bad life" when you're on an island with
several dozen strangers?
Gordon: Sorry. I like the show. It's still built on sociology, and the wide mix
of race can make this show very interesting.
Mike: Fire good, no fire bad?
Chico: You'd be surprised. Good life... Food, shelter, and amenities fit for a
Turkish holiday... whatever that is. Hard life... well, it's Survivor, use your
imagination. The question I have now... how will this twist affect the game?
Obviously the onus is on the tribes to win. But as far as the interplay...
Mike: It'll be just like The Apprentice LA--the losing team will be upset but
motivated to win, while the winners enjoy their amenities.
Gordon: I think it will affect the Interplay greatly and will be much different
than the premise on The Apprentice. It's going to be much harder to like people
who have more than you do, and hence harder to get along with come the merge.
Chico: Hmm.. very interesting take. This like the Two Americas argument?
Gordon: Exactly like it - but as the greater America, you need me, The Smaller
America, for my vote.
Chico: One can't get along with the others, or like is the excess something that
can become addicting, and when you have it no more, then you start coming up
with withdrawal... Wow... who knew that this season was going to run so deep?
Don: I didn't think of it like that... Sounds like this'll be more interesting
than I thought.
Gordon: The winner this year is going to be the person who can be the best
negotiator. It is like Burnett's ideas are running together, but with completely
Chico: Amazing the way things work, isn't it?
Gordon: For example, if I wanted to get to one of the 2 most popular foreign
travel sites, I would have to go to Don's house.
Joe: Don has a travel site?
Chico: News to me. =p
Don: Wait... When did I get a travel site?
Gordon: Did you know that the 2 most popular countries to travel from the US are
Canada and Mexico?
Chico: Ah, travel SITE...Well, from one sociological parable to another... We're
going back to high school.
Mike: I do that 5 times per week. 2 times a week when the temps are below zero,
like this past week. :-P
Joe: For those playing the home game, Mike's a math teacher.
Mike: Regular readers should know that. :-)
Chico: Yeah, it was pretty cold... unless you were a teenager on the Jeopardy!
set. Then you were red hot. This was probably one of the better Teen Tourneys to
come around in a while.
Mike: The level of competition this week was superb.
Chico: That it was.
Joe: No doubt of that. The semis and the championship match should be awesome if
this week's shows are any indication.
Gordon: Excellent competition, and you have a number of players who could win
this - but the player to beat probably showed up on Monday.
Chico: Hank Robinson?
Mike: Yes. He was amazing.
Chico: Which leads us to Big Board time...
Teen Tourney Favorites
- Gordon: Hank, Heidi, & David
- Mike: Hank/Ben, Heidi & David
- Joe & Don: Agreed
- Chico: Hank, Heidi & Stephen
Chico: Time to handicap this thing. You have three choices for finals.
Gordon, please lead us off.
Gordon: My favorite is Hank Robinson. he not only is a smart guy, he's a very
Chico: And the other two?
Gordon: I liked Ben Schenkel and David Walter.
Chico: Okay, Mike, your final three?
Mike: Monday's matchup has Hank Robinson playing my dark horse in the
tournament, Ben Schenkel. (Ben had $20K+ at the end of Double J! on Thursday but
ended up a wild card since he missed Final J!). Whomever wins on Monday will
take it all.
Chico: Okay. Don?
Mike: For the other games, I'll take the two players from Friday night's
game--Heidi Fogle and David Walter. Both deserved to advance, and they did. In
summation, Hank/Ben, Heidi, and David.
Chico: Okay, Don?
Gordon: Ill go Hank, Heidi and David.
Joe: I'll go with Gordon and Mike's choices.
Don: I'll concur.
Chico: I'm going to go off the board and say Hank, Heidi, and Stephen. Certainly
the meta-game will come into play next week. We know you're good at recall...
how good are you at wagering? That will decide the tournament.
Gordon: Very true. And then in around 15 years, some of these people may go to
another show to pay for their wedding.
Joe: WHOO MILLIONAIRE!: :D
Gordon: So what highlights did we get this week, Chico?
Chico: In a word... underwhelming.
Mike: Excellent description.
Chico: The highest anyone left with was the $25K bailout.
Gordon: 2 heads aren't better than one, eh?
Mike: What really bugged me is that people didn't use their Switch the
Question. I saw it happen at least twice.
Chico: The lifelines can only help. That's why they're called lifelines.
Mike: True, but if you don't know question 1, why not roll the dice on a new
question? You have no worse than a 1 in 4 chance on getting the 2nd question
Chico: that's right. And even on a $50,000 question, you have nothing to lose
Gordon: True. You should absolutely never leave with Lifelines on the table
Don: Would've been good for Steve & Molly to use that Lifeline on Tuesday, since
they had different gut feelings.
Joe: No question.
Chico: Lifelines. They're yours. Use them. This bit of advice brought to you by
British Chest Gropers for Better Pop Music. Gordon, I believe you know where
we're going. This week, I believe we had what could possibly be the worst
audition at least I'VE ever heard. The song, allegedly... is "Black Velvet" by
Joe: Oh no...
Gordon: It wasn't awful, just incomprehensible.
Chico: I heard of making the song your own... but DAMN SON!
Chico: That was ... a totally different number.
Joe: And it's a quick way to be shown the door.
Gordon: Oh it was their own. Complete with original melody, and lyrics, but on a
happier note, the wackiness is over. Now we get to the fun part - the audition.
The Hollywood week promises to be fun - and it also shows us who the contenders
Chico: One of these jokers is the American Idol, and after the Hollywood Round,
we'll see who has the chops to go on to the public vote.
Joe: Actually...an article on TV Week quotes producer Nygel Lythgoe as the
Hollywood week being 'a bloodbath'.
Gordon: Bloodbath. Sounds fun =)
Chico: Meanwhile, it's news time. Aight then. Choppler is hot. Gordon, that's
Gordon: Roll That Beautiful Brain Footage
Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your
frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper,
Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)
Chico: Thanks. First story, G?
be on Identity? You can go to Chicago, Atlanta, Phoenix, Las Vegas, and Dallas
to audition, or call 1-888-634-2654 to be on the show as an identity and win
Chico: Easiest $400 you'll ever make.
Joe: If you get picked.
Chico: But of course, you have to prove yourself TV friendly. Of course, I'd say
that Gordon as "Bowling Alley Inspector" is a lock.
Gordon: lol I was wondering when that would come up
Chico: "Now Gordon... Glass blower... Is... that... your identity?" "(raspberry)
Chico: Next story...
want to be on the World Series of Pop Culture? You'll have your chance to
qualify as one of the Perfect Strangers wild-card team online at vh1.com
Chico: Remember this date: February 14. Hard to forget. It's Valentine's Day.
Joe: The Block's b-day, isn't it?
Gordon: That it is. If you remember last season, the Perfect Strangers almost
won the whole thing
Chico: That's right. So if you want to get in on the game, it's February 14,
this Wednesday, at 7p or 10p ET on pciq.vh1.com. And you could compete for your
cut of $250,000. And maybe school Pat Kiernan in the ways of a proper game show
host in the process.
Chico: Okay, maybe not, but we can all dream.
Gordon: El Snoozeacabra
Chico: Okay, Gordon... Now I want some Haterade.
Gordon: We'll make it topical. Speaking of American Idol...
wacky Contestant Coordinators are at it again on Idol, this time not allowing
Akron Watson to play because, supposedly, of his drug conviction. Now normally,
this would make sense, except for the fact that it hasn't stopped Idol before
from bringing in people with drugs on their record. Bo Bice, anyone?
Chico: ... yep. Perhaps they're looking to avoid any skeletons. Remember the
Joe: The who?
Chico: The twins who beat their sister or something. No, wait, that was Corey
Gordon: Twins who beat their sister??!!
Chico: See? They're trying to cleanse the Idol choosing process.
Gordon: Corey Clark beat his sister. The Brittenums got jailed for forgery.
Chico: Thank you.
Gordon: Next article?
Chico: Next, let's get fully loaded.... *phone rings* Hold on... Hello? That was
Jason. He says "HIC". Today, it's The Apprentice.
is coming to the PC.
Chico: It is to play like the TV show. That's... really all I can say about
Joe: If you're into that kind of thing.
Mike: Unless it's Trump Card, I don't want The Donald on my PC.
Gordon: You know what Donald would say to the motherboard if you downloaded the
wrong candidate to your computer?
Chico: You're fried.
Gordon: Very good. The Donald is a good media ho, ain't he?
Chico: Speaking of... *plays "Area Codes"*
Joe: I'm Fried? When did I turn into a Colonel's Crispy Strip?
Mike: Don't you remember Trump's House of Wings from SNL about 3 years ago?
Don: I remember that! lol
Chico: How can I forget. Thanks, Jay... that was an entertaining icon.
Mike: I had an icon of that too...
Chico: That was a very popular icon. What can I say.
Mike: It was the funniest thing on SNL in a decade.
Joe: Not for me. :D
Gordon: In this week's Hodometer...
Covington thanks Simon Cowell for helping him get a contract, while Paula Abdul
gets sued, Shandi Finnessey goes on Tour, Tim Gunn moves to Clairol and gets
ripped by Jay McCarroll...
Mike: Where in the world will Shandi be?
Joe: Shandi on tour? Doing what?
Chico: She was in Edwardsville talking up cancer research.
John Gray is the first contestant to appear on a reality competition show and
announce he is HIV positive (not to be confused with Pedro Zamora, who was in
The Real World: San Francisco, but that was not a reality competition show).
Chris Tarrant gets a divorce, and Oasis singer Liam Gallagher appears on
Chico: Let me guess... none of them are our ho of the week? =p
Gordon: How did you guess?
Chico: Eh. Just lucky. So who gets the Pimp Cup this week?
Joe: I'll bet it's Donald Trump.
Gordon: The pimp cup goes to...Katharine McPhee, who's debut album debuts...at
#2. Very impressive.
Chico: And who's #1? Norah Jones.
Joe: Yay for McPheever.
Chico: And quite deserved, I might add.
Gordon: Don't know why...
Joe: ...I didn't call. :P
Chico: Sounds like RPG music that song does. Did I ever say that? Because I'm
saying it now. Okay, let's go global right quick.
Gordon: I see. final article?
Chico: This week, two trips to opposing ends of the big money spectrum.
one end in the UK, Tesco manager Dennis Powell becomes the first on DoND to win
the whopping total of... 50p.
Chico: That's about a dollar here.
Mike: We have The Dennis Club over there. 50p is the last box value to be won on
On the other end, Mark Eizenberg, a lecturer in Australian politics, ran the
distance on their version of the Rich List, ending up with $125,000.
Joe: The Australians actually LIKE that show?
Chico: That's almost $100,000 here... and yes, Australians like that show.
Mike: If I might throw in another item, Australia's version of the UK's Poker
Face debuted this week. It's called The ConTest. Just like its UK counterpart,
the Aussie show is great. Hopefully we'll get to see it in the states.
Chico: Let's hope. Because ABC's 0 for 2 on this sort of thing. Remember they
were supposed to get both ConTest and DoND? Yet they said yes to Master of
Mike: They let Deal lapse, and we know the rest of the story. ConTest/Poker Face
is much better than Show Me the Money.
Chico: Goes to show you where THEY'RE priorities lie.
Joe: Yeah. Lost and Ugly Betty.
Chico: Okay, Brainvision over.
Chico: Next up, we play roles and break out the favorite two words of Goodson
and Todman. But first, Gordon has the results of last week's YLTI.
Gordon: I do indeed. The question - youre the head of GSN. What show do you
Joe: RUSSIAN ROULETTE!
Gordon: I know what Joe's choice is.
Joe: So does everyone else.
Mike: I chose Russian Roulette too.
Don: I concur, simply because I haven't had a chance to see it yet.
Chico: Russian Roulette.
Gordon: And 54% of the audience agreed with you.
Mike: A majority. Booyah!
Gordon: 27% said Whammy, 11% said Extreme Dodgeball, 4% said something
else, and 4% said BallBreakers
Joe: lol. So what's this week's YLTI?
Chico: Simply put...
Chico: You vote. We'll tabulate. I wish it was less simple, that's how simple it
is. We'll come back to that next week, but we'll come back with Roleplay after
the break. This is WLTI, celebrating five years of... umm.. help?
Mike: Spreading the love.
Chico: That works.
Mike: ROFL JOE
Joe: Mike remembers where that comes from.
Mike: I do
Chico: I do too. Drunken game night.
Joe: But only for MX.
(Brainvision has been brought to you by Sabado Karaoke. In a few weeks, Simon
Cowell will tell people that they sound like they should be in 'Chilean Karaoke'
(like he did in Season 1), so why not send them over?)