Episode 25.14 - Holiday Two-for-One
December 13

Chico: Hey, gang, it's Chico Alexander. Benry's gone, America. We called it. That's the last you'll hear of that in the opening round.
Jason: (applause)
Gordon: Twas the night after Hanukkah, and all through the land, people saw that the Benry has just been canned.
Chico: Gordon Pepper, the bard.
Jason: He's talented like that.
Chico: And now it's time for the weekly bard's tale. From Crabtree Valley Mall in Raleigh, NC... WLTI... is.. ON!
Jason: (WHOO HOO!)
Gordon: The sun is just rising, the wind it is blowing, some shows are a' coming, and others are going. The Gordon and Chico are here to rock, along with our special guest Mr. Jason Block.
Jason: I am glad to be here, to be full of good cheer...and I hope you haven't given me a rock.
Chico: Not yet.
Jason: Yet?
Chico: :-)
Gordon: We are all here to have a good time, but the rock that I placed in your bag was lime...stone.
Jason: Ok...THAT was a stretch
Chico: Yeah, dude.
Gordon: Not every painting can be a Van Gogh, as we start our program with the end of a show.
Chico: And if that bad poetry you continue to emote, you'll find my hands slowly constricting your throat :)
Gordon: ...fine. Let's start with an Apprentice Finale.



Jason: Ah ok.
Chico: It was Clint's to lose... and he lost it.
Gordon: I don't think he lost it. I think Brandy came out and took it.
Chico: Explain, sir.
Gordon: Brandy came out with her best sales pitch - instead of taking the Apprentice angle, she went with the she wants to be part of a new generation angle. It was new, it was slick, and it was what got her the win.
Chico: Okay, I'll give you that.
Gordon: Clint, on the other hand, gave us a generic interview that we've seen on the show countless times. And since neither of them really performed that well on the final task, something as small as the final speech could make a huge difference.
Chico: So basically it's more or less a "come along on a journey with me" approach.
Gordon: If I'm an employer in a business who's market approach is aggressive, that's what I want to hear from my employee.
Jason: Exactly.
Chico: So you can say that Brandy came in this with the bigger "what did I learn" vibe. And that's what helped her along.
Gordon: It didn't hurt. But I think that she ripped the ball from Clint and ran with it.
Chico: So you could say that Clint knew how to get to the final, but Brandy knew how to get the win. But did Clint really have a chance in the final?
Gordon: I think he was the favorite going into the final task. But I don't think he sealed the deal. In sports terms, you have to play this 24/7, and I think he glided down the stretch instead of being aggressive.
Jason: Prevent defense?
Gordon: I'd say that
Chico: Would you say she gets an MVP for pulling it out in the clutch?
Gordon: If you don't mind giving out more than one of them out, sure.
Chico: No I don't mind.
Gordon: Then give one out, sir



Chico: I got another one, and it's a...



Gordon: (divided by 10)
Chico: One of our favorites around here: The Ultimate Fighter. This season, it was Team GSP vs. Team Koscheck.
Jason: As of the tape time, the coaches will fight Dec. 11 on PPV.
Chico: Or as the Finale shows, Team GSP vs. Team GSP.
Gordon: Yeah. In terms of teams competition, this wasn't even close. From the opening pick, George St. Pierre was all over Josh Koscheck.
Jason: And MMA fans say...well duh :) He isn't the best "pound for pound" fighter in the world for nothing.
Chico: And he's also the best pound for pound coach. Again, both fighters give it a heck of a show.
Jason: Was this as one sided as when Rampage got his ass kicked?
Chico: Maybe more so
Jason: Yipe.
Chico: You probably want to know how it ended, don't you.
Jason: Um...yeah :)
Chico: It was Jonathan Brookins vs. Michael Johnson for the title of the Ultimate Fighter. This one went the distance. This was just a culmination of said idea. Brookins downs Johnson in a split decision. I told you, a great show.
Jason: So Brookins gets $100,000, a contract, a car, the glass trophy...and?



Chico: The bragging rights.
Gordon: I don't think we've heard the last of Michael Johnson, either
Chico: Nope
Jason: Have they announced the next coaches yet?
Chico: Not yet, no
Gordon: But they have announced the remaining 6 singing groups on The Sing Off
Chico: Yay
Jason: Did it get better from Season 1
Chico: I would say that it did.
Gordon: Much better. The talent level has gone up.
Jason: How about the "sob story" aspect?
Chico: I haven't seen that many.
Jason: That's good. Last year they went overboard which was a bit of a turn off
Gordon: It's still there - sort of, but they balance it better.
Chico: Now they concentrate on making the group work.
Jason: That's good.
Chico: Any favorites so far?
Gordon: Well I think, like anything else, it depends on who makes the finals. My personal favorites are Groove For Thought, but I think that if Jerry Lawson makes it to the voting part of the finals, he wins.
Chico: yeah, about that. I have to say something... "RINGERS!"
Gordon: That being said, I think The Backbeats right now are the team to beat. Your thoughts, Mr. Alexander?
Chico: Of the six still in it, I have to say that I like Groove for Thought the best. I'm not that big on Jerry Lawson & Talk of the Town if only because of Jerry Lawson and his 20something records.
Jason: He has a deal?
Gordon: Jerry Lawson was a big name back then during that era. He was the original voice of The Persuasions
Jason: Does he have a deal now? Probably not. Hence forth... Illegal no. Moral...not much
Chico: Yep. And then he met Talk of the Town, who sang the Persuasions... it's like Anakin meeting Emperor Palpatine
Gordon: He is in the Doo Wop Hall of Fame. The man is VERY accomplished. That being said, the rules don't say they can't be in the competition. And this is nothing new. You know who sponsored NOTA the money to come from Puerto Rico to get into Season 1? Daddy Yankee.
Chico: Interesting. What Jason said. Illegal, not really. Immoral.. quite.
Gordon: Why immoral? Tell me in the rules that this competition has to have all unknowns. This is about the BEST a cappella group. I don't remember them saying that they have to be unknowns.
Jason: They don't. But the image that was started by American Idol in 2001-2002, basically gives the "impression" they SHOULD be unknowns.
Chico: True. There's no rule saying that, but you have to admit that having a seasoned professional is a bit of an up yours to the rest of the groups. Just saying an opinion. I want to see someone who comes out and gives us a moment
Gordon: They still all have to sing. So tell me something. WHat would you rather see - a group of all unknowns who falter (AKA American Idol seasons 8 and 9) or a Sing Off that features Take 6, The Manhattan Transfer, et al.?
Jason: Honestly, I respectfully want American Idol Seasons 8 and 9. I want the true unknowns to succeed.
Gordon: Ask Lee DeWyze how that worked out for his CD sales.
Chico: HA.
Gordon: Or would you prefer 4 a cappella singers come out with guitars?
Jason: That's not the show's fault.
Gordon: No it's not. But my point is that as a viewing audience, a talent show is only as good as the talent. Idol may have learned their lesson, as 300+ singers, far and away the most on the history of the show, are allegedly going to the Hollywood rounds this season.
Jason: Allegedly.
Chico: And out of that... 15 will make it to the vote. It's crazy
Gordon: Well we're not 100% sure of the format, I've heard anywhere from 12 to 40.
Chico: Again, crazy
Gordon: But the point is that I want quality in my music show. Idol knows that, and they know that if they screw up this year, they will be singing their swan song, so to speak, so they will not take any chances.
Chico: Sing Off... well, it doesn't have that stress, so it just comes out and makes a good show. And it did that in season 2.
Jason: That's good.
Gordon: Well it does have that stress, just like any talent show. Bringing in a Jerry Lawson will guarantee that you get some ratings going in, and then you can hope the viewers stay should Jerry falter.
Jason: Point.
Chico: But do you see it?
Gordon: Of course you do. I semi-agree with Jason here. If you didn't see it, then Jerry isn't on the show. If he makes the finals, he wins, going away. As we've seen time and time again, the audience doesn't always vote for the best performance. They also vote on back story, and no one is going to touch 40+ years worth of back story.
Jason: Not at all.
Chico: I'm not so sure, we may have the DWTS crowd voting soon...
Gordon: And who does the DWTS crowd vote for? They vote old. Donny Osmond, Jennifer Grey, etc. Jerry is right in their wheelhouse.
Jason: Exactly.
Gordon: If Jerry gets there, he wins, and if he's in the finals, he can sing 'Like a G6', 'Do The Macarena With Me', or anything from the Paris Hilton catalogue and it wouldn't matter.
Chico: Ew.
Jason: DOUBLE ew.
Gordon: Heck, he could have Nick and Vicki come in to sing back-up, and he'd still win.



Chico: I'm actually surprised as to how close this might've been
Gordon: I'm not. They missed the equalizer plane trip and it was all over. You knew who you're Top 3 teams were going to be after the first 5 minutes of the show.
Chico: I'm not saying I didn't know, I'm just surprised as to how the equalizer came into play like that.
Gordon: I don't know about that. They never showed the time Vicky and Nick left. What time did Jill and Thomas leave?
Chico: 4:47, four minutes AFTER Nat & Kat
Gordon: And Brooke and Claire?
Chico: 5:26
Gordon: When Brooke and Claire got to the pit stop on the last episode, it was daylight.
Chico: And the flight leaves at 12:25
Gordon: Nick and Vicky got to the Pit Stop in pitch black darkness.
Chico: All it said for them was "last to depart"
Gordon: And they quit a task, which means they probably got there house later. So let's say they got there at 7pm. Add the 6 hour delay, and it's 1am 12 hours later - they leave at at least 1pm. Which means that they left AFTER the plane taking the other 3 teams left. Which is why you never saw what time they left - because it's too late at that point.
Chico: I see
Jason: And at the end...you didn't even see much of what they did.
Gordon: So I think they had no chance, though the editing made it look like they did.
Chico: But you knew that. Do you KNOW who'll end up at the finish line tomorrow night?
Jason: I think Brooke and Clair become the first all female team to win
Chico: I think it's a close one, but Jill & Thomas win.
Gordon: Since Jason is going with Brooke and Claire, I fell safe with Jill and Thomas.
Chico: Yay.
Jason: You suck :) Both of you :)
Gordon: Unless they get confronted with...NINJAS!
Chico: I was waiting for this show. It's American Ninja Warrior, season 2. Just like season 1, only vastly better.
Gordon: I agree. The good shows seem to improve from their previous seasons.
Chico: Yep. They kept what worked and took out what didn't. New hosts ratchet up the excitement. The show is better paced, It's better produced (Arthur Smith & Kent Weed are experts in this medium)... and there's no Blair Herter.
Jason: lol
Chico: Matt Iseman and Jimmy Smith... this is their show.
Gordon: I agree there.
Chico: I would have to say that the later you're profiled the better the chances. Unless your name is Levi Meeuwenberg.
Gordon: Here's what I like. I like the fact that the people who failed get to try again. For example, Travis Furlanic, who seemed to learn from last year when he failed the Jumping Spider on season 1.
Chico: Right. A carryover from the original Sasuke format.
Gordon: That being said, I don't think any of them have a chance of completing it.
Chico: Nope. The course itself is meant to be "fun, but nigh impossible." But props to G4 for putting up the $250K and saying "We're not playing around here."
Gordon: I agree. It's tough and it should be.
Chico: For $250,000 it better be
Gordon: Maybe they would have a better chance with Candy Canes an Supercoins.
Chico: Minute to Win It?
Gordon: Yah. So what happened during this show?
Chico: Triple the cash for one.
Jason: Damn.
Chico: And some holiday gifts for the players. Allison Chapman & Autumn McAlpin play. They get up to $250K before time runs out. But over the course of the game, they get a few lifelines. First, an extra life. Then, an extra 10 seconds. Then, Despicable Me on Blu-Ray.
Jason: Universal/NBC Synergy
Chico: So the rest of the game will continue next time with $125,000 at risk and the bonus time in play. But aside from holiday cheer, we had a fourth place finish, ratings-wise, and we all said this was going to happen. It was on opposite Glee, NCIS, and whatever was on ABC at the time. Charlie Brown?
Gordon: Yep. Stunt programming Vs. Scripted established shows - bad.
Chico: It's a good show, but it's a summer show.
Jason: Exactly.
Gordon: Yep. Should never go into Winter.
Chico: ABC's going to learn that with Winter Wipeout, I reckon.
Gordon: And then we'll all be discussing this as a reason for a show's demise.
Chico: Right on, and the hamsters will have something NEW to play with... an empty set?
Gordon: Well, semi-empty. The hammies are shushising down the open space with some of the candycanes.
Jason: That works,
Chico: Ain't that cute.
Gordon: Meanwhile, Cooper melted some of the Peeps together to make a sled.
Chico: Peeps in winter?
Gordon: Don't ask me where Cooper finds this stuff.
Chico: I won't. I'll just ask you to...
Gordon: Roll That Beautiful Brain Footage?
Chico: Bingo.

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Thanks. Doug. Let's start things off with a datebook, shall we?
Gordon: (Tries to open Datebook). There's marshmallow all over it. I can't get it open. COOPER!
Chico: Melted Peeps. They'll get you every time
Jason: (hands Gordon a spatula) Will that help?
Gordon: No.

No new shows, as I can't open the datebook. But it is Survivor Week, with the finale on Sunday.

Chico: That will be interesting
Jason: Lets have all the contestants quit except the one who doesnt...right?
Chico: Ha
Gordon: The one who doesn't quit wins. However, this sometimes helps people from quitting (hands Chico a bat)
Jason: Easy, big fella.

In the Business End, we apparently have a host for Cash Cab Chicago. Stop at... Beth Melewski.

Gordon: Interesting choice. I think it could work
Jason: Who is she?
Chico: Chicago-based improv comic
Jason: She needs to know that SHE isnt the star of the show.
Chico: She'll be trucking contestants to and from positions, as the players, who are now revealed to be as cast as any other, compete for cash.
Jason: If she can pull it off like Ben Bailey, this will be good stuff
Gordon: If she can let it flow, she'll be fine.
Chico: Big shoes to fill. Emmy-winning shoes to fill.
Gordon: Green light?
Chico: Green light...with pumps.

Season 3 of "RuPaul's Drag Race": January 24

Chico: It's a FABULOUS greenlight. With an even more fabulous lineup of guest judges inclduing Wayne Brady.... and Bruce Vilanch.... and Johnny Weir.
Jason: Good stuff.
Gordon: That's good stuff. Who wants some bad stuff?
Chico: Right here. Maybe it'll make me barf, make me feel all better.

Are YOU Smarter than...Richard Hatch, who once again gets to visit the courtroom for violating his probation.

Jason: Dude! What did he do?
Gordon: Ok. If you've been accused and sentenced for cheating on your taxes, you probably should not go blabbing about getting a $1,000 refund check from the I.R.S. That sort of sets off the red flags.
Chico: yeah, it really does.
Gordon: And if you did legitimately get the check, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.
Jason: Oh boy lol
Chico: You would think he would know this by now.
Gordon: Apparently not. This guy always like to have his mouth open, also.



Chico: Open wide, prepare to Hassle the Hoff.

And the Hoff will be hassled. And eaten. And Stripped. And stripped and eaten. And eaten and stripped. After 2 episodes, the Hasselhoff's get yanked. That's the same amount of episodes David was on for Dancing With the Stars.

Chico: HA! That's a lot of eating. Augustus likes cheeseburgers
Jason: Hoff did a TON of press for this.
Gordon: After seeing his show lose over 50% of lead-in Gene Simmons audience and then watching the ratings erode like sand off Mt Rushmore, David Hasslehoff's show is yanked, never to be seen again except on Hulu.
Chico: Who? Lou? What about Lou?
Gordon: And quite honestly, if a show based on popularity favors Margaret Cho and Audrina Partridge over you, then maybe you need to think twice about your star power carrying a show. Soapbox please?
Chico: Do it.
Gordon: (Gets on Soapbox)
Jason: (hands Gordon the megaphone)
Gordon: The most important thing about a person is their credibility. Maybe The Hoff didn't get it when he allowed the zany people to advance in America's Got Talent, but if you're not credible, people will not follow you. I think him doing just that seriously annoyed people to the point where the public turned on him. Memo to Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler: Just do your job. I don't care about your persona, but do your job. Let what happened to The Hoff be a clear shot across the bow to you if you don't. I'm done. (Gets off soapbox)
Jason: I have one serious thing to add if I may.
Gordon: Ok
Jason: The cheeseburger video, which may have shot Hoff back into sobriety, unfortunately turned Hoff's image from a C-List success to a national punchline. And from an image perspective, he hasn't recovered from that.
Gordon: I'm going to disagree.
Jason: go on
Gordon: He did recover. The problem is that his decisions on the show made people think that he fell off the wagon.
Chico: You mean he didn't? Awww...
Gordon: I'm being serious here. Look at what happened to Kara DioGuardi when people wondered what she was doing.
Jason: I don't think just his decisions on stage were his downfall. A part yes, not all though.
Gordon: As a judge, you have a job to do. The good ones, like Simon Cowell and Piers Morgan, can shine. The bad ones get buried.
Chico: Right on.
Gordon: Meanwhile... We haven't seen this in a while.



Jason: Awwwwwwww
Chico: That's cute. What's it for?
Gordon: Here's a Big Brother team you WON'T be seeing on The Amazing Race.

It's time to evict the relationship that was Big Brother's Brendon and Rachel. This after Brendon texted his Brett Favre in images that would be more suitable for Big Brother After Dark.

Jason: WHOA BABY! ROFL. And it wasnt to Rachel I bet.
Chico: Let's just say ... there's a competition on the show... the Head of Household...

Chico: Did. Not. Need. to See. That.
Jason: That was the clean pic.
Gordon: Correct. Other pics...not so clean. Lets get loaded.
Jason: (HIC)

American Idol gets the video slot treatment in Vegas

Chico: Good stuff, right?
Gordon: Sure is - though it may be a tad out of date if they have judges faces on it.
Chico: They... are a tad out of date. Not that I mind.
Jason: Bad bad choice then.
Gordon: Yeah. Not a great move. Though very very funny.
Chico: Also very funny.. (plays *Pimpin'*
Gordon: Before that - we need a red sofa
Chico: Got it.
Jason: (Jason Hauls sofa into the studio)

We got another season of America's Best Dance Crew, so we need more dancers. If you can dance, go here - http://www.realitywanted.com/call/9409-casting-americas-best-dance-crew-on-mtv-for-its-most-cut-throat-season-yet

Gordon: And while we're at it...

The WWE is looking for a few good wrestlers. If you feel you can hang, go here: http://www.realitywanted.com/call/9196-are-you-tough-enough-for-wwe-casting-now

Gordon: Finally...

If you're a globe-trotter and want to be in a new Mark Burnett series that sounds a lot like The Amazing Race redux, go here: http://www.realitywanted.com/call/9116-new-global-competition-series-from-mark-burnett-expedition-impossible-now-casting

Chico: makin' cop-ays.
Jason: I smell the toner
Gordon: And now, let's get some hoes.

In this week's Media Ho Report, Neil Patrick Harris will host the Spike Video Game Awards, Bill Todman gets into the TV Academy Hall of Fame, Carly Smithson joins Cirque Du Soleil... Rumors of DWTS future contestants include Christina Hendricks (Lobbied by Tony Dovolani) and Lindsay Lohan (denied by her publicist), Jillian Michaels voluntarily leaves The Biggest Loser after Season #11, and 'The Situation' will help MTV ring in the new year.

Gordon: But none of them are your Ho of the week.
Jason: Who is it this week?
Gordon: It's Michelle Durbin.
Chico: Friend of yours? Heh.
Gordon: The last time you saw her was on Big Brother...until you turned on GSN and watched Baggage on Friday night.
Chico: I'm about to go into uncharted territory... Can I have a Big Bored, please?

Chico: This is called Bagged Brother. This is what we learn about our friend the kinky neuroscientist that we DIDN'T find out whose 84 days. The small bag: Michele owns and uses a guillotine.
Jason: (shudder)
Chico: The middle bag: Michele lives with a male pr0n star. And the big one... first story in the news of the obvious... Michele dates women. EVEN while in a relationship.
Jason: Kinky. Did she "win?"
Chico: Yes she did. And her suitor's big bag... "I have threesomes with my twin brother"
Jason: EWWWWWW.
Gordon: But...she kept him.
Jason: Not a surprise.
Chico: Basically said "I'm game if you are.' This is clearly a woman with no shame.
Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Chico: And finally, we have bags, let's go somewhere.

A live edition of "Wanna Bet?" was pulled midway in Germany after a stunt goes awry.

Jason: This was NOT cool.
Chico: The bet was... will one person jump over his father's cars? He failed to the point of injury. So much so that Justin Bieber, who was due to perform, pulled out.
Gordon: Yeah, we hope that the people involved heal up quickly.
Chico: Yeah
Jason: They are doing better, from what I hear.
Chico: That's good. Okay, that's Brainvision. Jason, please.
Jason: Shutting Down. Power down to zero. Choppler is off.
Chico: Still to come, fun with one liners, but first, G?
Gordon: First up, we go shift 5 all over the place. You're reading WLTI. You give us 22 minutes and we'll give you 22 singing groups that we think should be in Season 3 of The Sing Off.
Chico: Here's a hint, Gordon, Jason and I are forming one. :-)
Jason: You want to WIN, don't you?
Gordon: ...good point.

(Brainvision is presented by the Sink-Off. How would you like to compete in a plumbing/musical competition? It's like Blue Man Group, but not as blue and not as quiet.)

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