Episode 25.10 - Good vs. Evil
Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and...hey Chico,
why do you have those long keys and a big circular keychain?
Chico: Because i'm going to do something I've dreamed about for the last nine
years... and lock you up.
Gordon: Should I get on my Elvis outfit and start learning some tunes from
Chico: ... Yes. Yes you should. I'm going to lock you in the crypts of the GSNN
compound with the scourge of society until such a time that I feel better about
Gordon: So in other words, you're going to send me down with my evil minions and
keep us there until we do something so outrageous that you have no choice but to
let us out.
Chico: Basically. Meanwhile I'll be monitoring you from the penthouse suite with
open wet bar and satellite TV that I set up for this occasion.
Gordon: So THAT'S what happened to my satellite TV. Bastard.
Chico: I had to get it from somewhere...
Chico: Okay, you know what that means. Time to get you down to the crypt. But
before you do. is there something you want to say to the internet?
Gordon: I will. From somewhere at Chico's Wet Bar and Satellite TV room
(Bastard), the Good Vs. Evil, Round 3 Edition of WLTI...is...ON!
Chico: Alright, come on, you...
Gordon: Grrrr...(Gets led downstairs)
Chico: Now that Gordon is in his dungeon, it's time to hang out with my good
buddy, Jason Block.
Jason: Pleasure to be here....and the steak is AWESOME by the way.
Chico: Now if you've never seen Good vs. Evil, what's going to happen is that
we're going to pong-report. Gordon'll do his thing, then I do my thing... and
it's all good. So we're going to start with dancers doing their thing.
Chico: Jason, I've been doing a lot of thinking as I update the site... You like
Dancing with the Stars, right?
Jason: Of course I do.
Chico: Now... If Bristol Palin wins, DWTS is screwed because you're going to
have people complain that it's a popularity contest with a dancing element.
Jason: And American Idol isn't a popularity contest with a singing element?
Chico: ...True. If Bristol Palin loses, DWTS is screwed because you're going to
have a small but vocal minority of fangirls whining that the fix was in. Is
there any way that this doesn't end with DWTS being screwed?
Jason: Absolutely. The fact is, it doesn't matter who wins personally. To me,
anyway. Because what happens is that the people who are bitching and moaning
that a) the fix is in or b) the judges, the cast, et al. hate the Palins so the
vote is a big **** you to the liberal judges/voters are the more politically
aware. I mean why would they cover a news story when a guy shoots up a TV?
Chico: Only if it was Elvis.
Jason: Only to embarrass the Palins. I am just saying this is a WIN WIN for the
show, because it gets people talking about THE SHOW
Chico: So this is all a case of "Oh the controversy! Oh the drama! ... Oh, the
Jason: When Bristol loses (and she will), this will be another week story and On
to season 12. Because the Palins (love them or hate them) are RATINGS GOLD.
Chico: It's time to use our brains for a change and handicap this thing.
Chico: Okay, we've got three couples left; Jennifer Grey & Derek Hough, Kyle
Massey & Lacey Schwimmer, and Bristol Palin & Mark Ballas. Let's go over the
Chico: First, the points. Jennifer & Derek average a total of 26.5 points a
routine, Kyle & Lacey, 24.2, Bristol & Mark, 21.5.
Jason: Again, not a surprise here.
Chico: So if we were to convert that into percentage points (which apparently
Mark Cuban did), then jennifer already comes into this with a 36.7% handicap
from the judges, versus 33.5% for Kyle & Lacey and 29.8% for Bristol & Mark.
This is all hypothetical.
Chico: Even so, it's a very tight spread...
Jason: but its 50/50 judges people right.
Chico: Right on.
Jason: It's not as tight as you think
Chico: Which brings us to the audience. Oh, it's as tight as you think.
Jason: No way. I will tell you why. Give me a big board please
Dancing with the Pick'ems: Jason
- Jennifer has to finish second
- Bristol gets the popular vote
Jason: Thank you. Now...we all know that Bristol is the most popular with the
Chico: or at least among the most popular. They never release the voting
Jason: of course.
Chico: But she's popular enough to last week after week.
Jason: But lets say she wins the popular vote. The only way she has a shot at
winning is if she finishes 2nd or 1st in the judging. Is that going to happen?
Chico: That's not going to happen.
Jason: So, the most points she can get is 4
Chico: Not unless she's been holding back on us and Jennifer & Kyle flame out.
Jason: Now if Jennifer & Derek do as well as they do dancing wise... all they
have to do is finish 2nd in the popular vote. That gives them 5. Then Kyle gets
2nd in the dancing and 3rd in popular giving them 3. Hence...Jennifer Grey will win the Mirrorball trophy. Do you agree?
Chico: I'll give you that Jennifer wins the Mirrorball Trophy, but here's why it
may be closer than you think.
Jason: Do you need a board?
Chico: I need a board.
Dancing with the Pick'ems: Chico
- Jennifer gets lion's share of the score
- Bristol's popularity MAY cancel that out
- Tight race.
Jason: Show me
Chico: Now we all know that judges and the audience are a 50/50 split.
Chico: But for the lion's share of the seasons, it all came down to who the
audience chose. Because if you think about it, clearly from a points stance...
The audience's vote will carry the most weight.
Chico: Now Bristol has that fanbase. She doesn't have the skills to justify it,
but she has the fanbase. So all those fans will inundate the lines for every
vote they can muster. That'll ratchet up her numbers.
Jason: Again nothing new there.
Chico: What Jennifer wants to see, and we've never seen it, but what she wants
to see is that the judges will give her competition less and less points and
more and more for her, so she'll have the greater percentage going into the
audience vote. That's what was explained.
Jason: That's going to happen.
Chico: That said... it's all going to come out in the wash, and Jennifer will
take the victory, because, like you said, all she has to do is come in second
with either the judges or the audience, but yeah, it's going to be close. It'll
be an interesting final, to say the least.
Jason: Very much so.
Chico: But as we all know, evil has to have their say in this. Let's see who
Gordon has in his dungeon this time around. (Flips Satellite TV on).
Gordon: Welcome to the good part of the show, which would
be the evil side. I, the usually evil Gordon Pepper am here serving boiled rats,
and serving the side order of leeches this week, is the semi-evil James Dinan.
James: Hello all, and I'm only evil on Tuesdays and every other Thursday
Gordon: While Chico and Jason discuss things that are good, we'll be discussing
evil things, and we start with the evil of Birstol Palin potentially winning
Dancing With the Stars.
Gordon: So according to Mark Cuban and his blog, he thinks Bristol Palin can win
due to percentages.
James: I agree with that....for one thing, Bristol has, thanks to family ties, a
following that will loyally vote for her without hesitation. You always hear of
fans switching votes week after week, but "Team Bristol" will remain loyal to
Gordon: According to my understanding of the rules, you get points based on the
judges scores and points based on the audience. HOWEVER, the only way Bristol
wins is if she does not come in last in the judges voting and the audience puts
her in first, or if she comes in last and the audience votes in this order:
Bristol / 2nd placed by the judges (probably Kyle), 1st placed votes by the
judges (probably Jennifer).
James: And that's going to prove difficult, unless she pulls off the dance of a
lifetime. Even then, it still won't match the efforts of her competition.
Gordon: I agree with that. As much as I would love to be completely evil and say
that Bristol will win this competition, it's going to be way too hard for
Bristol to get past all the fail-safes the DWTS producers set up. That, and I
predicted that Jennifer Gray would win from Day #1, and I'm certainly not going
to stop now.
James: I'm with you there. Bristol's made quite the run, but she'll come up
short at the end
Gordon: So you know who I think wins. Who do you think wins?
James: I'll have to go with Jennifer as well....she's on a phenomenal run in
recent weeks, and she pretty much took control of the competition weeks ago
Gordon: She did. So evil is backing up Baby in a corner.
James: I second the motion.
Gordon: So that's what we think of DWTS. We now go see what Chico and Jason
think of 1 vs. 100, since they will like the show much better than I would
because some GSNN buddies are in the mob. Go ahead and praise nepotism. Meh.
Chico: Thank you Gordon, and yes, we have our friend Travis Schario (which we
wanted on the show, but couldn't get, so sad)... and our friend Chad Mosher
(which we also wanted on the show, but couldn't get, also sad)... It's just like
the primetime version, except for three things. 1) the players are playing for
$50,000. 2) the mob is prerecorded for games, and 3) the host has nicer legs.
Jason: The show itself is pretty much the same show with a few exceptions. But
you know what? She isn't bad. She is a good conduit.
Chico: Okay, let's start with the good... the game, even with the change from a
live mob to a prerecorded one, is as solid as ever.
Jason: The game is still there. Nothing new.
Chico: And as simple as ever. The more people you knock out, the money you win.
If you knock out all 100, you pick up $50K cash money. Answer one question
wrong, though, and the mob collects your money.
Jason: And there are carryover contestants.
Chico: Yep. And instead of three helps, though, you're only given two. Poll the
Mob and Trust the Mob. Ask the Mob probably wouldn't have made any sense in this
Chico: But yeah.
Jason: The thing is...while everything is good. Nothing is GREAT.
Chico: The game is the game and they didn't change for the sake of change. And
that's good. The bad... I don't like the webcam mob.
Jason: I DON'T like the computer screen mob. That is a HUGE budget saver.
Chico: You know, you bring all of these people in for the game, you could've
made a smaller set piece.
Jason: If the average flight is $300 round trip. Just for figuring sake.
Chico: It would've cost just as much to do as to bring in all these people and
prerecord their answers. And you know, some of them could be local.
Chico: We would have no issue with that.
Jason: This makes the show FEEL cheap
Chico: I mean, you look at the show and the set and the screen... and it all
feels a little cheap. Almost like it screams "basic cable". Now when they
rebooted "The Singing Bee", that was a step up. Of course, they had the full
might of MTV Networks behind them. This was a step back.
Jason: This is a MAJOR step down.
Chico: And finally, J, you're going to hate me for what I'm about to say here.
Jason: Go ahead
Chico: I didn't think Carrie Ann was that good.
Jason: See what I said, I said she wasn't bad. I said she was a good conduit. I
never said she was a good HOST.
Chico: I mean, she's a good conduit, but you look at her and you think "your
little sister wants to be a game show host. Now if you can make way so that the
big boys can host the show, TYVM."
Jason: There are a lot more things I think when I see her. But this is the good
side and I wont say them. Heh :)
Chico: Yes she moves the show along and no one is going to fault her for that,
but when she's not too loose, she's too tight. She likes to switch between
wooden and water. Oh, we're ALL THINKING IT. Some of us have been thinking it
since 1991, for crying out loud.
Jason: In Living Color...damn. :) But yeah she needs to pick a style in stick to
it. Shall we grade?
1 VS. 100
GSN - 7p ET Weeknights
Chico: Yes we shall. I'm going to give it a C+. It's good, but it could've and
SHOULD'VE been so much better.
Jason: I will just give it a C. I like it, I dont love it. A lot of elements
work, but the ones that dont are MAJOR.
Chico: I'm curious as to see what G gives it.
Gordon: The show? C-. Once again, I go back to the 'If you have to take the show
and turn it, make sure you have all of the elements that make the show work'
argument. The 100 webcammers who are clearly playing this non-live against the
contestant hurts both the interaction and the use of 'Ask the Mob', which was
one of the fun parts of the show. You can clearly see that they are using the
same mob members, which is great for the Mob, but notsomuch for the viewer. The
translation of the game itself works, but they need to get a bigger budget for
Season 2 (and I do think there will be one) because it affects the gameplay.
Gordon: The intelligence of the remaining people on Survivor? F.
Gordon: Last time we checked up with our Island Idiots, the young started to
cannibalize their own, booting out Brenda.
James: Happens every season...eventually, everyone turns on everyone....much
crying and arguing ensues.
Gordon: Yes, but I don't see why you do that now. Not when you have 3 old farts
left in camp to get rid of first.
James: Perhaps the remaining younguns think they can drag the old farts later in
the show, then take them out just before the finals
Gordon: Thats a horrendous idea. The 'old farts' are the ones that will pick up
the votes in the Finale. If any of them make it to the Final Tribal Council,
James: But as we've seen on many of these shows, common sense is generally
thrown out the window. It will likely bite them in the butt at the end, but they
won't know that until, well, the end.
Gordon: True. So with Brenda gone, we see Chase and Sash, combined with NaOnka
and Kelly. Jane is an outside looking in, while Fabio, Benry, Holly and Dan are
in the minority. If youre in the majority, who are you targetting first?
James: I would say Fabio or Dan, but knowing the previous voting style,
anything's on the table, and they could continue eating themselves out of
Gordon: If Im smart, I start getting rid of the people who can win. If the old
people are left, they win. Dan, who is likable and old, goes first, then Holly,
then Jane. Then we pick off Benry and Fabio.
James: Sounds like a smart plan, but then again, common sense isn't a
requirement for this show :-)
Gordon: Well, no. That's why they are morons. On a side note, this is also
turning into 'Who will give me the money if I'm next to them', and we have
p[lenty of candidates. Do either Chase, Sash or NaOnka have a chance at the
million if they are not next to each other? Or do they need to be together in
order to win?
James: I would think they need to be together...even if means backdoor dealing,
I think it would be the best shot for them to get the big bucks.
Gordon: I think if one of them leaves, it turns into whoever can get to the
finals with the other 2 people wins. That's how just how badly I think Chase and
Sash have played the social game.
James: Agreed...the social game is a key part at winning "Survivor" -- you have
to understand that aspect to be successful.
Gordon: See Hantz, Russell on how not to play it and Diaz-Twine, Sandra on how
to play it.
Gordon: See Alexander, Chico, on how to brutally get his Jeopardy tournament
picks painfully wrong.
Chico: (Makes face at Gordon). It was still a good tournament.
Jason: Absolutely. The tournament was fun. My father and I both enjoyed it.
Chico: Oh yeah. It was going to be a thrill from start to finish, and the three
who finished didn't disappoint.
Jason: Not at all.
Chico: Though I did have one moment when I wanted to take Lea Tottle to task
about final Jeopardy! Wagering. Seriously... blowing the wad in the lead is
unacceptable in the best of scenarios. Especially with a spot in the finals on
Chico: There's an Are You Smarter moment if ever there was one. Now looking back
at our picks... Mine totally stunk. Gordon got two out of three.
Jason: As usual :) He's good like that.
Gordon: Sure am, rookie
Chico: Quiet you! (Sends satellite signal to shock dungeon cell doors)
Chico: And stay out!
Gordon: Fine. Hmph.
Chico: Now where we we? Okay, let's set the stage. At the end of the first half,
Hans von Walter was in trouble. He starts the second half with nothing.
Jason: Pretty much sealing his fate
Chico: Erin McLean led Sam Spaulding, $15,999 to $4,400. At the end of the
second half of Double Jeopardy!... Hans had done everything he can, but with a
score of $13,800, there was no possible way he could win this barring a Hail
Mary from both Erin AND Sam. Erin could theoretically bet NOTHING and still win.
She had $16,000. Add that to the $15,999 she had before, $31,999. Sam has
$14,800. Double it, $29,600. Add to the $4400... $34,000. SLIM chance to take
it, but only if he went all in.
Jason: Very much so. Do you have the question?
Chico: I do. The Final Jeopardy! category is Our Living Planet...
Several species appear in the logo of the UN's International Year of this
12-letter word, vital to the health of "life" on Earth.
Jason: They also showed the logo. And I had this.
Chico: You had...
Jason: What is "Biodiversity"?
Chico: You would be correct. Erin McLean had half that. She just had Diversity.
She didn't have to bet the farm. She didn't. So Jeopardy! gives Erin $100,000,
and we give her this...
Jason: She was a good player.
Chico: Yes she was. Don't know why she was in shock all the time. So that's a
race to the win. Gordon has a race to the loss.
Gordon: Fortunately for Jeopardy contestants, reading directions is not how to
play the game. Unfortunately for Amazing Racers, it is.
Gordon: This has been a really bad season to promote literacy
James: Remind me not to invite the contestants to a Reading is Fundamental
Gordon: Absolutely not. Now U-Turns. Those are really evil.
James: Agreed on that wholeheartedly
Gordon: Two teams receive that - Brooke and Claire and Chad and Stephanie. In a
close match-up, Brooke/Claire outraced Chad/Stephanie. But neither of them would
have been in that position if they were as smart as Jill and Thomas, who found a
flight 3 hours before anyone else. As a result, they cruise to first and get to
U-Turn Brooke and CLair, while Nat/Kat U-turn Chad/Stephanie.
James: That's the way to play it, that's for sure. You always have to think 2-3
steps ahead to win at TAR.
Gordon: Very true. Chad/Stephanie's U-Turn, combined with them not being quick
on building a rickshaw. does them in. Now will we get an actual winner on this
series, or will we get a team that wins out of attrition because all of the
other teams make too many errors?
James: I would say the latter. For a show that's been fraught with errors this
season, it's only appropriate that an error leads to a victor.
Gordon: Possibly. though that's very unsatisfying television. However,
Brainvision is always satisfying. Roll that Beautiful Brain Footage.
Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your
frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico
Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)
Gordon: And we start with an evil Datebook
James: How evil is it?
November 22 has Skating with Celebrities, a format that's already failed twice
in the states, so that's pretty evil. December 1st has Top Chef All-Stars. Who's
up for All-Stars?
James: (Resists raising hand)
Gordon: Tell me any all-star shw that we will remember. ANY show.
James: I'm trying! I'm trying! I....just can't.
Gordon: Usually, it's not a ratings grabber. It's a swan song. Chico has some
fun brainy idea that some executive thought up.
Chico: I'm going to need to find the breaking news bat. Ah, here it is, the one
with the sirens and beacons on it.
Jason: (hands Chico the breaking news bat...with spikes to break the glass)
Chico: (breaks glass)
Fox has just released its new midseason lineup. Some shockers on it, as American
Idol is moved to Wednesdays & Thursdays... and Million Dollar Money Drop will
extend its run through to January.
Chico: My guess is... Fox is scared. One, what's on Tuesdays that everyone
Jason: NCIS? Or Biggest Loser? Or Dancing?
Chico: The correct answer is... yes.
Jason: Ah ha!
Chico: Second... historically, if someone makes a release about this sort of
thing Friday night AFTER hours? What does that usually tell you?
Jason: That the show is in DEEP trouble. No matter what the press release says.
Chico: Does this sort of strike you as a season that will tell the tale, on
Jason: I don't think there will be a season 11 actually.
Chico: Interesting thought. Okay, moving on to other things that make me say...
Seriously, you greenlit That?
Jason: (turns on the green light)
Drew Carey and GSN are teaming up for an improv show to drop spring of 2011.
Jason: Whose Line 3.0?
Chico: It reads a whole lot like Whose Line Is It Anyway? but without using
those words. It'd be the third such show that Drew Carey has done. Let's see,
there's Whose Line, then there's the PPV Drew Carey's Improv All-Stars. Then
there's Drew Carey's Green Screen Show. And now this. Untitled Drew Carey
Jason: Hey as long as he makes the cash, more funny for us.
Chico: I don't disagree with that. We all love improv. We all love Drew.... but
GSN? Come on, now. This needed to go to a Comedy Central or a Spike TV or
something, but not GSN.
Jason: Let's see what happens before you think he is slumming
Chico: True that. But I read the release and the first thing I thought was "Oh
here we go." But let's see where Drew and his gang take us.
Jason: Of course.
Chico: It's Drew Carey. It's going to be funny. Gordon has something funny...and
sad too, I suspect. *sends Chalkboard to the basement via posh elevator*
Are YOU Smarter than...Karla Abea, who is the first person to lose to the Mob on
a rather easy question on 1 Vs. 100.
Gordon: The question:
According to USA Today, 76% of Americans think that new brides should do this:
A. Keep her last name, B. Take her husbands last name, C. Hyphenate her last
James: Or D. Re-consider that "marriage" thing :-)
Gordon: Well, for over 50% of Americans, that's eventually the right answer, but
play along. What would you say?
James: I would probably say "B"
Gordon: And you would be...correct!
Gordon: Karla decides that all women want their last names hyphenated, so she
loses $5,000 to the mob.
James: Just because she does doesn't mean that 76% of all Americans agree with
Gordon: Apparently, not, though common sense would dictate it as such. And since
this is an evil show, we need one of these...
R.I. P. one TV set, thanks to Steven Cowan, who shoots it after seeing that
Bristol Palin made the finals of Dancing With the Stars.
James: Next time, use the phone to vote a "star" off the show. And guns don't
kill TVs -- crazy people do.
Gordon: If you don't vote, you can't complain. I'll let Chico complain as he
gets Fully Loaded.
Chico: Alright, Thanksgiving's a perfect time to get loaded.
WildTangent is going to implement what they call a "Brandboost" to Ludia's TPIR
Chico: What that means... those ads we hate so much... expect more of them. ...
Chico: A smart move to monetize the game... not so smart if you want to keep
users happy. But a clever way to make more media hoes.
Gordon: And now, for some evil media hoes.
RuPaul hosts a 3rd season of Rupaul's Drag Race, Vernon Kay will host skating
with the stars, Jen Scheft has a baby...
James: Behold the "Bachelorette" child!
TJ Lavin recuperates at home, Ocho-Cinco is now involved with a basketball wife,
and Alex Trebek is going to guest star on How I met Your Mother.
Gordon: But NONE of them are the ho of the week.
James: But who is?
Gordon: Your ho is Ali Fedetowski, who postpones her wedding to Roberto
Martinez because she needs a job. '"So right now, I'm trying to figure out my
own path and until we have a stable foundation, we don't really wanna rush into
James: Well, it IS hard being a full-time "Bachelorette". Not sure how you
explain that job description on your resume
Gordon: People assocaited with the situation have said that, because she hasn't
gotten the media opportunities that other contestants have gotten, and since
that was supposed to finance her lavish wedding, she doesn't have it. Now who do
James: The latter over Ali.
Gordon: I would agree. Then again, we're evil, so we believe these things. :)
And those...are your hoes. Finally, Chico wants to take you on a vacation.
Unfortunately, it's not away from him.
Chico: (Stares at Gordon) Well, in that case, now for something Gordon's really
going to hate. The rest of us, not so much... Going to the UK...
Jason: (hops on the plane)
...and Davina McCall gets another season to look all hot for us while money
drops through a hole in the ground, as season 4 of "Million Pound Drop" is
Jason: There you go
Chico: Obviously there's something to this, like it or not... But speaking of
which, there's a Bonus...
Jason: What's the bonus?
Fox releases video of Million Dollar Money Drop...
Chico: I watch it. And all I can say is, when I compare it to Million Pound
Drop... This is why we can't have nice things.
Jason: Exactly LOL
Chico: Because if you're not running it to death or overgimmicking it... you're
putting it on Fox.
Chico: Okay, that's Brainvision. Jason, shut it down, please.
Jason: (Shutting down)
Chico: Still to come, Gordon may be evil, but he has some good news, but
first... the faces of ... good? This is WLTI... you give us 22 good minutes...
Gordon: We'll give you 22 evil things to bring with you for Thanksgiving.
Devil's Food Cake. Deviled Eggs. Any sort of Fruitcake...
(Brainvision has been brought to you by The World's Worst Chef's Thanksgiving
Cookbook. The perfect solution to avoiding turkey for leftovers. After Turkey
Pudding, Turkey Oatmeal and Turkey Cupcakes, you'll never want to see turkey for
the next 3 months, let alone the next 2 weeks.)
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