Episode 21.11
August 17

Chico: Ba. Zing.
Joe: I thought John Kerry was hosting
Chico: He hosted the 2004 version.
Joe: ah
Chico: Welcome back. And if Mr. President is watching... we apologize. But you passed our test... and you can be our friend.
Gordon: Sort of. Now get that health care bill passed.
Joe: Also, if you're watching.......OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGTHE PRESIDENT READS THIS OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG
Chico: While Joe is busy fanboying it up, we're going to Play the Percentages!
Jason: ROFL
Chico: Okay... let's start with Paula Abdul.

There's a small but vocal contingent that believes somehow that this is all a publicity stunt. So give us a percentage of the chances that it is... and Paula is coming back for season 9.

Jason: 100%. This is all about money and she will get it.
Chico: I'm going to go 5%. If Fox says she's done... She's done.
Joe: I'll go in the middle. 55% from me. I still think this is Fox trying to cut some bad PR in hopes that it'll stop the ratings from "falling". She could be there for the finale.
Gordon: 35%. I think the door is open. I don't know if she's going to go through it. There's always hope if the ratings go down in January that they will relent, so it's not completely done. It's not looking good for her though.
Jason: I thought you guys were pretty good at your PR detectors.
Gordon: I still think the ratings take a hit.
Chico: So did we. But never mind last week. So that averages up to a... (bleep beep beep)... 49%. Could go either way. Next?
Gordon: Next one...

Dancing With the Stars has 16 contestants in September. What's the chances that one of them is Miss Abdul?

Jason: The door is open. It all depends on if she is with Idol. So, sticking with my theory...0%. She signs with Idol and stays off DWTS.
Chico: I'll go 48%. Plausible, but we all know how much a loose cannon Miss Abdul is
Joe: Meh, let's be original. 1/16 or 6%. It would be a major get, but her prior career may be too pro for this
Gordon: I'll go 0%, but for a different reason. If I'm DWTS, I put her on in January, directly against Idol.
Chico: Out of spite? Out of drama? Out of ratings?!
Gordon: Not spite. Ratings.
Chico: I can see it now... The dancer the other network didn't want.
Gordon: If you want to knock out Idol, that's where you put it. We all agree she'd be an overwhelming favorite to last a very long time on the show.
Chico: So we have an average of... (bleepitybloppitybloo!) 14%. Next up... Onto a different subject.

We all know how bad Face the Ace did. What are the chances of it coming back next month?

Joe: 5%. It is NBC, after all
Gordon: 100%. It's on Saturday afternoon either before or after college football, and more importantly, it's sponsored, so it's not going to cost NBC much money.
Jason: Not to sound like a yo yo ...but 100%. They have a contract for 6 episodes and in a place where it will do better.
Chico: I'm going to go 90% on this. I'm sure it's coming back, but nothing is certain around here.
Gordon: Keep in mind that it was planned to move to Saturday afternoon, regardless of how it did in Primetime. And it's just a better fit here witl the college crowd in the afternoon.
Chico: Of course. And with college football on the horizon... It's a fit.
Jason: Hangover programming basically.
Gordon: You have to program it somehow.
Chico: Yep. That gives us a number of... (insert bleeps here) 74%. It's coming back, and I'm going to watch Megan for the hour.
Gordon: There you go. next one...

August 19th - Top Chef Season 6. August 20th - Project Runway. Far and away, Runway is getting the bigger buzz. What's the % that it also gets the bigger ratings?

Jason: This is going to be tough. I will say about 35%. This is going to be a ratings battle to watch.
Chico: Umm... 66%. People have been waiting a long time for this.
Joe: 80% because I think Lifetime is a more visible station
Gordon: 30%. Thursday is a tougher night and I think Bravo's Top Chef line has more clout right now. by the end of the season, that could change,.
Chico: And that calculates to... (bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep) 53%. A literal tossup
Gordon: Next one?
Chico: Next one.

P. Diddy's new talent search starts this week on MTV. It's "StarMaker". Will it be another in a string of MTV musical failures or not? Give it a percentage on completion.

Chico: As in... it sees through its run and not any sooner. (ie MTV's Top Pop Group)
Joe: So it's the % chance it doesn't get cancelled mid-run
Jason: 25%. I think his luck has run out.
Chico: Right, Joe.
Joe: 40%, and I'm probably being generous
Chico: I think Joe's got it dead on. 40%. He's got a lot more luck making Bands, if you follow.
Gordon: 80% It depends on the talent. one thing Diddy is very good at is talent scoping. If he brings the vocalists in (instead of anyone else providing it), it could do very well.
Chico: SO Gordon's the sole voice of hope. There's a sentence that doesn't come up often enough. And that gives us... (blip blip blip) 46%.
Gordon: I have faith in P Diddy. We'll see on Week #1 if that faith is misplaced.
Chico: Yes we will. Next?
Gordon: Last one...

X-BOX's 1 Vs. 100 was hacked into thanks to some good password guessing. What are the chances that a hacker was a fanboy?

Chico: Xbox or 1 vs. 100?
Gordon: 1 Vs. 100
Chico: Ah. 50%. Could be either.
Jason: I don't think so. 10%
Chico: They either like game shows or like winning.
Joe: 5%. It's just an (^_^)hole.
Gordon: 15%. It was an easy enough code to guess - which means he could be a gamer.
Chico: Meaning we have a total of... (dot-hack) 20%.
Joe: Fans tend not to wreck the object of their fandom unless there's something reeeeeeeally wrong with said fan.
Gordon: Or if they want the goodies. Chico, I want some goodies.
Jason: Me too
Chico: You want some goodies?
Gordon: GOODIES!
Chico: You want some goodies, J?
Gordon: And no, not Oodles. Goodies.
Chico: Joe do YOU want some goodies?
Joe: Will they spoil my dinner?
Chico: Heck no.
Joe: k
Chico: DO YOU WANT SOME GOODIES?! We've got some goodies for you next! Stick around!
Jason: I will.

(Brought to you by Starburst Maker... You think you can sing. You think you can perform... but can you make something out of little fruit chews? Didn't think so. Another P. Diddy joint in the trash dumpster)

Gordon: (sings) Do You Want a Banana?
Joe: I'd rather go on Snickers Maker, and get some bling with Master P-nut
Chico: Get dunked on by Patrick Chewing? Kicked on by Adam Nougatieri?
Jason: Yup.
Chico: Okay, welcome back... The sun is rising... The baby is crying... This can only mean one thing...
Joe: It's not 4:50 PM ET
Chico: Correct! It's actually 4:51. So sorry. But it means something major around here.
Jason: I smell newness
Chico: It's time to anoint... a NEW GAME. This is called...



Chico: Gordon, please explain for non-poker players what that is.
Gordon: Pineapple is a Poker Variant where you get 3 cards. You can get rid of one of them.
Chico: And that's basically what we're doing here.. We're taking three common things... and we're getting rid of one. Usually it'll be the one that doesn't go well with the other two. Be it better or worse or what have you. Here's an example...

Food Network is turning into the foodie's Game Show Network. They even have a block on Saturday afternoons of... CHOPPED, CHEFS VS. CITY, and IRON CHEF AMERICA.  Which one doesn't belong with the other two?

Jason: Getting rid of Chefs V. City
Joe: Chefs Vs.
Gordon: Chefs Vs. City. Not there yet as a program.
Chico: Agreed. It's a good start, but it's not up to the expectations set by the other two.
Gordon: Next one...

Regis Philbin, Jerry Springer, Nick Cannon. America's Got Talent has a 10 year reunion coming up in 6 years. Which one do you not invite to the party?

Jason: Honestly, Nick. He has done ZERO for me as host.
Chico: Regis on account of one very macabre reason.
Joe: May I go off the board and select every single member of this current series, talent included?
Chico: Sorry, it's Pineapple, not Joker's Wild.
Joe: awww. Then I'm afraid Mssr Cannon, on the fact that he runs with bad company, ie your acts for this Season. I like dogs, but not at a fancy party.
Chico: Who let the dogs out indeed. Pepper?
Gordon: I have to go with Cannon. I like him so far, but he has to increase the pacing. That being said, the producers also need to let him go a little.
Chico: You want prelim Cannon instead of live show Cannon. I totally understand that. Next up...
Gordon: I do., He was good as prelim show cannon. Now he's just wooden stodgy cannon.
Chico: Blow the cannon down? Heh. Next?

Bravo's known for having some of TV's best reality competition...Then, there's Top Design, Shear Genius, and The Fashion Show. Cancel one.

Jason: Fashion Show. Making COPIES.
Joe: Agreed
Chico: Honestly, why was this show even made? Wait, I know. Because Lifetime paid cash money for their cash cow and they needed a salve. Sad, but true.
Gordon: Because it's their way of thinking we'd forget about Project Runway. Wrong. Discard The Fashion Show.
Chico: Done. Next?
Gordon: Next one.

GSN's Big Saturday Bust. The Money List, 20Q, Big Saturday night. please discard.

Joe: a-durrrrrrrrrr BS Night
Jason: BSN. No LOLs at all.
Chico: Easy. Big Saturday Nightmare on Elm Street V. Jason Takes Over GSN.
Gordon: Actually, I'm keeping Big Saturday Night in my hand., I can retool it and make it the show it SHOULD have been.
Chico: I know which show G's bouncing.
Gordon: The Rich List should never have been formatted to a stand alone hour show. It works much better as a continual series. Get rid of it.
Joe: It's just as much a continual series as Family Feud
Gordon: As I have said before, BSN was a great idea. I think they should retool it and bring it back. Make it a 3 hour Sabado Gigante style show instead of a watered down version created by non game-show minded people. You put in people who
Chico: Yeah, but they pad each game to half an hour when they honestly don't need ot.
Gordon: know how to play games and not just be in it commercially and it could be a Saturday staple.
Chico: Well, that's been the problem of GSN for at least a year or two now. It's run by people who don't know game shows. Come on, now.
Gordon: As for TRL...it lasted ONE episode on FOX and you kept it exactly the same. You should have expected it to tank.
Jason: BINGO.
Gordon: Next one?
Chico: Next one...

Three shows that premiered over this summer... Three unlikely hits. At least critically... 20Q, Catch It/Keep It, Shark Tank. Not everything gets renewed. Break someone's heart. I dare you.

Jason: Got to nail the 20Q. I don't like it.
Gordon: I will, since I don't like 20Q as much as you guys do, nor is it doing great in the ratings. GSN should scrap it and pick up season 2 of Shark Tank from ABC.
Jason: I like it.
Joe: I'm going to crib from another game. 20Q should, but Shark Tank will
Chico: I'm going to go with Joe on this. 20Q has potential and is a fit. Shark Tank... not a fit on ABC on Sundays. ... I honestly don't know where it's a fit.
Joe: CNBC
Chico: Bingo. And it's not like they didn't do a game show before.
Joe: or rerun game shows that have no connection to business (Looking at YOU, Deal or No Deal).
Chico: At least DOND was abstract. What did 1 vs. 100 do?
Joe: I hear that Face the Ace is getting rerun on there, too.
Chico: WHAT?1
Gordon: If I was NBC, Id pick up Shark Tank also. It helps their synergy. Make it a 2 hour block with that and Celebrity Apprentice.
Chico: Are you kidding me? Now Gordon has the right idea
Joe: Maybe that was just a joke, but idk http://www.cnbc.com/id/31909548
Chico: Oh doctor. Soemone call a doctor.
Joe: That was last week :P
Chico: Alright, last Pineapple?
Gordon: Last one, and I'm going to add a card game here. Who's familiar with Fluxx?
Joe: Vaguely
Jason: Go on
Chico: I am.

You just drew a Radioactive Potato and you need to get rid of it. Which Big Brother Houseguest best personifies a Radioactive Potato? Chima Simone, Jase Wirey or Justin Sebik?

Jason: Chima. Nuclear.
Joe: Indeed
Chico: Chima
Gordon: Chima it is. Fortunately, we'll be leaving the show on our own accord. Speed Round Next!

(Brought to you by The Chima Syndrome. The team that makes Chima go nuclear first loses and has to pay back any damages caused by her eruption. Tis a bad day to be a microphone...)

Chico: We could milk that joke all day
Gordon: We have been, actually.
Jason: Yeah we have.
Gordon: But we have yet to do the Speed ROund today, so let's do it! Big Brother - What happens now?
Joe: Big Brother keeps on turning, Proud Mary keeps on burning
Chico: Umm... no double elimination, that's for sure.
Jason: Don't know.
Gordon: I think we get a single elimination week and I think Nat may want to pack her belongings to go right after CHima.
Chico: Okay. Top Chef. Watching?
Jason: Yum. Yes.
Gordon: Duh. America's Got Talent: Do we get any more than 2 good acts this week?
Jason: I hope so.
Gordon: Speaking of which, who wins Top Chef Masters?
Jason: Rick Bayless.
Chico: I think it's going to be Hubert Keller. He's been on all competition. 20Q and Money List wrap up seasons 1 and... 1... Who, if anyone, gets a callup for season 2?
Jason: Neither one.
Joe: Unfortunately
Chico: Well, it was good while it lasted. Always good no matter how long it lasts is what you all have to say. Any mail, G?
Gordon: I think they both get sent to the showers. But I have some good mail. This from Myke Perrey. Thanks, Myke!

Chico: I think Myke is absolutely dead on here. The clock expedites taping, not the game.
Gordon: Thanks, Myke. I happen to completely agree with you. All they have to do is start te clock AFTER the audience reacts to the answers, and we're good.
Jason: Sorry I don't buy it. I am old school all the way. The clock is the biggest problem with Millionaire.
Chico: You've been there, J... Is there some sort of magic that disappears with the pregnant pause?
Jason: Sometimes, but with the clock you are sucking the life out of the contestant. It's like question, clock, answer.
Chico: How about you, G... The clock, pressing or sucking? I personally think that the clock presses.
Gordon: Thanks, Myke. I happen to completely agree with you. All they have to do is start the clock AFTER the audience reacts to the answers, and we're good.
Chico: After a year of watching it. It's like "I need to think of an answer and I need to do it NOW."
Gordon: The clock presses. It's a good way to go with it, because sometimes it's too much time wasted. I know that Regis likes to joke and all, and maybe they should stop the clock when he does, but you can't stay there for 5 hours either o
Gordon: on an answer.
Chico: I hate to make this comparison... but either piss or get off the pot. That's what the clock does.
Jason: I am sorry, you guys are SO wrong on this. I would rather have 10 Kati Knudsens then 1 person who got nailed by the clock
Joe: And you'd sit there for all 10?
Jason: Damn right I would.
Chico: I have to side with Myke. If you can't answer a basic-level question in 15 seconds... Right or wrong... get out.
Gordon: Next email?
Chico: Next is from ... Joe.
Joe: :)
Chico: Seriously. He sent this the day after he was on the show.
Gordon: Hi Joe! :P

Chico: Thanks Joe!
Joe: No prob
Jason: Seriously, I like Deal. I don't like it as a hour.
Chico: All I can say is this is the same network that gave us "Hurl!". So... I really don't expect much in the way of execution.
Joe: Apparently, people have been contacting Pilgrim Films, and they've been very helpful and polite.
Chico: I say, go directly to the source.
Jason: Davies got royally screwed.
Chico: As for Deal... It works, but not as an hour. It has possibilities, no doubt... but an hour of LMAD... every day... As much as my heart can take it, it can't.
Joe: But it can work, provided there's some actual QC, as opposed to the previous attempts.
Gordon: I agree. Thanks, Pilgrim Films. As a game show fan, I don't know if an hour of LMAD is too much, but I do know that I would watch it if there weren't any other game show alternatives, and in my area, there aren't. I think it's going to do well.
Jason: It will.
Joe: Of course, in those markets which had Guiding Light at 3PM, this conversation is moot
Jason: Yes.
Chico: Next letter... from Gary De Haan. Thanks, Gary!

Chico: Thanks, Gary. There ARE two Cash Cabs, but there aren't. See, the first Cash Cab (from seasons 1-3) is 1G12.
Jason: Two production vehicles? One cash cab?
Chico: Then they switched cabs when I believe all the NYC cabs got made over. So the production vehicle with the registry 7N78 is the one designated as Cash Cab. This from seasons 4 onward. Hope that clears things up.
Jason: Sounds like it.
Chico: And now you know. And knowing is what?
Jason: 1/2 the battle
Chico: That's right.
Gordon: Half the battle, or something like that. Maybe it's making cookies.
Joe: I like cookies
Gordon: Or maybe it's an email from Stat Boy!

Gordon: That's true. a 1-4-10 combo is called a 'Wash'.

Jason: OH man
Joe: Stage 2--anger. And how did they not retire his number?
Chico: It's comin'...
Gordon: Actually, I hear they sent in the application - but the dog ate it.
Joe: I thought Antonio Pierce tried to hide it. At least there's one thing we can all agree on, though. The Cowboys suck
Jason: Yup.
Chico: AGREED.
Joe: They'll collapse faster than a practice tent come December
Chico: Joe Mello and Jason Block... wonderful as always to have you...
Jason: Thank you.
Joe: no prob
Chico: And if you want to curse their very name... or ours... or shower us with praise, whatever you want to do... Send us some email to wlti@gameshownewsnet.com or find us on Myspace or facebook or YouTube or any street corner in North Jersey.
Gordon: Thanks. For Joe and Jason and Chico, this is Gordon, saying Game Over
Jason: And SPREAD THE LOVE.
Joe: And cookies
Jason: Oreo Double Stuf please.