Episode 20.15
April 20

Gordon: So Chico, last time we did Good Vs. Evil, it was a lot of fun.
Chico: Yep. Let's rewind back to October of last year...

-----

Chico: So as I stow my dark half away for a moment...
Gordon: Not in the dungeon. We stuck the Schwab down ther...mmmph...

-----

Chico: It's all about control. You need the control. So that's far off into the future, but for things we have this week...
Gordon: I guess Chico wants a Datebook. I got a Datebook for you...Right here!

(There are no new dates this week. What do you expect? This is the cold dark damp and EVIL version of the show! EVIL! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!)

Gordon: And now for news, weather and sports, here's Chico :D
Chico: ...
Jason: Walk it off, man. Walk it off.

----

Chico: ... That was some good stuff. And we've heard a lot of good things from it as well. Apparently that was our best show ever.
Gordon: Well...I wanna do it again. I will cast my net evil far and wide to find as many denizens as I can.
Chico: And me, I'll go for quality over quantity...
Gordon: I laugh at your quality. Ha HA!
Chico: I laugh at your quantity. So we'll meet back here with our respective armies... Deal?
Gordon: Deal. (fist bumps). We shall see who has the best and biggest army.
Chico: BTW, I totally got this one. (runs off)
Gordon: We shall see. Here, evil evil evil...

(SEVERAL HOURS LATER)

Chico: Okay, while we lock Gordon and his motley crew away in Augustus's dungeon, we're going to talk all the good stuff that happened this week... well, most of it. And I have Mike Klauss...
Mike: Take that, Gordon!
Chico: ...and that's it?

(DUNGEON OF EVIL)

Gordon: Well, Chico, I'm sure you're wondering where all of the correspondents are, since you have Mike Klauss and only Mike Klauss with you. That's because everyone else is ALL HERE! BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
Jason: We are evil. Evil is where its at.
Don: Mwahaha.
Gordon: Isn't it fun to be evil, kids?
Joe: I'd have joined up with Ashton Kutcher, but I'd rather not have EA video games.
Gordon: And now, let's introduce the minions. Starting with the evil that is 22-4, in a new cursed by Boston Stadium, Mr. Jason Block.
Jason: Yankees won today.
Gordon: Score for the Evil Empire. Next up, from Canada, where...well Don Harpwood, what evil is there in Canada this week?
Don: Who knows...
Jason: Celine Dion wanting to own the Montreal Canadiens.
Don: Oh yeah, that.
David: Is that a joke or is that legit?
Jason: That's legit
David: You're right, that's evil.
Joe: that's diabolical
Gordon: Next up, from BuzzerBlog, a land of all things evil - especially since they are our sister site, Mr. Alex Davis.
Alex: Hello!! These pretzels are making me thirsty
Gordon: Evil pretzels. Next up, a man which we haven't seen since Hell froze over - but are delighted to have him with us, Mr. JD Hernandez.
JD: A mad man? From a very, very mad world?
Gordon: We're all mad here. Join the club. Anaheim isn't in first place. Seattle is. What's up with that?
JD: I think you should ask another one of our correspondents, Mister Van Ginkel. Although, I'm sure he's in Stanley Cup mode at this moment.
Gordon: I bet he put on a voodoo curse. However the Dodgers are doing well.
JD: Yeah, they haven't lost at home yet.
Gordon: Next up someone who's watching the battle of Pennsylvania in NHL land, Mr. Joe Mello.
Joe: Well, there's evil in Pittsburgh as the Pirates are playing Nothing but sadness in Philly, though.
Gordon: Excellent. Finally, from Game Show Talk and Fun, and someone who gets tortured by me and Jason Block on his radio show each week, Mr. David Hammond.
David: Well it depends on the torture Gordon :-P
Gordon: That's the spirit!
Jason: Welcome to the evil funhouse Dave!
Gordon: So Chico, enjoy the show with your army of 2 while we frolic in Augustus's Dungeon! BWAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAA!

(GOOD WLTI)

Mike: Augustus's dungeon? Didn't the Geneva Conference outlaw such torture?
Chico: And while he has a platoon. I have... well, I just have the one guy, but he's got the fight of three... Mike Klauss of ClassicGameShows.com here with me
Mike: Thanks for inviting me, Chico
Chico: No prob. So we go first into the return of a legend... in HD
Mike: In HD...
Chico: Mr. Robert. William. Barker.
Mike: Thank heavens HD didn't become commonplace until after Barker retired.
Chico: Nice to know that he still hasn't lost his spunk.
Mike: I'm glad he made at least one appearance on TPiR: The New Generation
Chico: so am I.
Mike: My one qualm is that the main reason he showed up was to shill his book.
Chico: At least he did it in a fashion that it didn't take away from the game.
Mike: If he popped up out of nowhere without an agenda, that would've been something.
Chico: True. But hey, it's something. You probably want to know what happened, didn't you?
Mike: True. I like how both of the showcases involved Bob and his book, albeit in some corny ways. Read about Bob on Truth or Consequences while on your 30-minute helicopter ride of NYC?
Chico: For starters.
Mike: If I'm going on a helicopter ride, I'm enjoying the sights unless I'm deathly afraid of heights.
Chico: Actually... for closers. For STARTERS, Bob gives everyone a copy of his book.
Mike: Free stuff is always good.
Chico: It's why you go to a Hollywood taping. $25 for free...
Mike: Plus you get entertained for an hour and a half, and you get the experience of waiting outside the studio for 10 hours. All of which are priceless.
Chico: Yeah.. And not really tome-ready. But here's the rest of the Showcase...First up, an iMac, a trip to New York City with a helicopter ride included, and a Honda Ridgeline truck so you wouldn't be reading the book. You'd be taking a helicopter to the publisher saying... Gimme mah book, bitches! Bid, please, Mike.
Mike: Hold on. Ted's giving me a bid. No wait, he was just thrown out of the studio. I'd bid $30,000.
Chico: Okay, $30,000... That's exactly $150 more than what Goldie Saegert bid. The price: $35,133. So not bad. Good deal.
Mike: Indeed
Chico: Now that you have a book... Where are you going to read it?
Mike: Probably when I'm flying to some part of the world?
Chico: How about on a luxury trip to Cabo including beach trip and dinner and a private jet.
Mike: The private jet is worth some serious coin.
Chico: Oh yeah. It's a Lucky Jet. Bid, please.
Mike: The jet itself has to be around $6000... How about $16,000, To be safe
Chico: Okay. $16,000 to be safe? Joshua Burk bids... $36,582
Mike: $36,582?! Was there $20,000 hidden at Cabo which came with it?!
Chico: What is this, Sale of the Century?
Mike: $36,000 to Cabo is way over.
Chico: Oh yeah.
Mike: You could BUY Cabo for $36,000.
Chico: Or at least a Cabo-Wabo franchise. The price was $18,084. So Goldie Saegert wins $55,590 in swag including her showcase... AND a French canal cruise. That's good for an MVP, right?


Goldie Saegert

Mike: Goldie winning that canal cruise on a tricky Squeeze Play makes her my winner of the week.
Chico: Like it. Let's see what Gordon and company like.. *knock* Hey, Gordon? What'chu like?
Mike: ROFL

(EVIL)

Gordon: We like to be evil! And we start the evil part of WLTI with American Idol, who gets roasted twice. Once for once again going over time, and Time #2, and to most people, the more eggregious, the judges save Matt Giraud.



Gordon: How awful of a move is this?
Jason: Big time. This was just a move for the sake of moving.
Don: I could not believe that they did that.
David: In my own words: TRASH! EVIL! P-U!
Jason: LOL
Joe: This was round of 7 correct?
Jason: Yes.
Don: Yeah.
Gordon: Right
JD: Agreed.... evil.
Joe: And the Save would have expired next week, yes?
David: No
Gordon: They could have used it for another 2 weeks - the Round of 5 would have been the last opportunity to use it.
JD: I understand...But Matt?
Gordon: Can I have a big Bored please?

Gordon: Subject: The Case against Matt Giraud. I don't even think I have to say why, as I'll let all of you put in the category. So go ahead.
Jason: Inconsistency. He didn't know who he was musically.
JD: Poor song choices.
Jason: Don Juan DeMarco was BORING.
David: He stunk up the place most of the time
JD: To go along with other Jason, he doesn't know who he is musically.
Don: I didn't find his performances to be too memorable most of the time.
Jason: And honestly...he had NO chance to win.
Gordon: I agree with all of you.
Jason: It was a wasted vote.
JD: He's gone next time, especially with a double elimination.
Gordon: This is now the second time he gets saved via the judges.
Jason: Next week is Disco. Which is in Lil's Wheelhouse. Danny's too. Adam has to do something memorable.
Gordon: I do think someone from the Lil/Anoop/Matt RPG Trio is gone. Maybe 2 of them. You can't maintain 3 R&B singers in the Top 7. Here's the problem here. You know the Matt callers will be voting to save him.
Jason: Yes...but his fan base isn't as big as Kris's.
Don: Anoop has been in the Bottom 3 for 3 straight weeks, hasn't he?
Gordon: And here's the problem. Don has mentioned that Anoop has been in the bottom for 3 straight weeks. Besides Lil and Matt, only Allison has been in the bottom. Which means that the audience is convinced that Anoop and Lil will both be sent packing next week.
Jason: Which may not happen.
Gordon: If I'm in Allison and Kris's fan base, I vote. Hard. Because this is a prime Chaos Theory Moment. Disco has not been kind to rockers.
Jason: For whose who dont know what Chaos Theory is...please tell the audience.
Gordon: Anyhoo, The Chaos Theory is that the people that are perceived safe are in trouble because the audience won't vote for them, thinking they will be safe.
David: Good point Gordon.
JD: Umhmm
Gordon: And I think Allison and Kris could both be in a world of hurt if they don't show up and perform. Allison much more than Kris. Here's a question for everyone. If you had a Judge's Save, who would you use it on?
Jason: Lil
JD: Lil
David: Lil
Don: Yeah, Lil.
Gordon: I could see Lil. There's no save next week. 2 people are gone. We'll see if one of the judges 'Untouchable' Final 4 is going to be crap on a cracker.
JD: Are we really all in agreement here?
Gordon: I think so. The judges are banking on Anoop and Lil leaving next week. Anyone besides those 2 will make them look very very silly. Speaking of silly, let's go back to Chico and his army of 2.

(GOOD)

Chico: ... And we're back. So we had a little Price... we had a little Idol... now it's time for a little J! for ya. This week, we had some good play and some not so good play.
Mike: Indeed.
Chico: Let's start with the good... Kevin Joyce. Remember that name. You're going to hear a lot of it, I suspect.
Mike: Oh yes. After just a few shows, he has made a name for himself.
Chico: This is a man who knows how to bring out the big play. He's had THREE, count'em, three locks in three games.
Mike: Go big or go home. That's my type of Jeopardy player.
Chico: Mine, too. And that's why he's up over $100,000.
Mike: We haven't seen a player with such a big risk/reward mentality since....dare I say it? Ken Jennings.
Chico: Whoa. You sure you want to say that?
Mike: I said 'since'. It's too early to compare the two.
Chico: I don't think Ken ever had the stones to just bet big. I think he was just smart.
Mike: Even Ken Jennings was in a very vulnerable situation in his first few games. Kevin Joyce has wiped the floor clean with his opponents.
Chico: The way I see it.. He eats players... and craps money. Game 1: $49,699.
Mike: On a very risky Final Jeopardy! wager.
Chico: Not so.
Mike: I didn't mean risky as in "he's gonna lose". I meant risky as in "there's a huge difference between $50,000 and $5000." $5000--nice chunk of change, can buy some furniture or take a nice trip. $50,000--goodbye student loans, hello down payment on a house.
Chico: And maybe cruise money. Let's go over it. Kevin has $27,200 to Anjali Bonner's $2200 and Marc Sacks' $1600. Here's said Final in... Explorers.

In 1611 Henry Greene led a successful mutiny against this captain, but soon after was killed by Eskimos

Mike: Who is Henry Hudson? He explored in the early 1600s and his explorations were in Canada and the extreme north.
Chico: Very good. Kevin knew it and won $49,699. Again, like you said, huge difference between $5000 and $50000.
Mike: Kevin Joyce has solid brass balls. I see most players who have victory secured making a smaller wager, in the $5000 range. But he took the bull by the horns and nearly bet the wad.
Chico: Oh yeah. Hey, the point is to win.
Mike: Did he ever.
Chico: You win... it's good. You win with a nice watch... even better. Question now... how far does Kevin go?
Mike: He has dominated his 3 games in a way few have in recent years. Not only were all 3 games locks, but Kevin had a huge lead in all 3 games. Not $200 more than double 2nd place.
Chico: Right. He just didn't know how to play the game. He knew how to WIN the game.
Mike: That's domination we haven't seen on Jeopardy in a few years. David Madden comes to mind. So does.....Ken Jennings...He even made big risks on Daily Doubles. Either he's that good or he's that confident in himself, if not a little bit of columns A and B.
Chico: So you think he at least gets in the next TOC? I know I do.
Mike: He's in the next tournament hands down. He'd probably need one more win to secure that much. Is he the early favorite to take the title? Yes.
Chico: Nice. Unfortunately, we had to see some pretty crappy play as well. Can I go over it?
Mike: Yessir
Chico: Okay, Mike. Let's say you're Michael O'Malley. Not the affable comic/game show host...But a Chicago prosecutor. You have $19,600.
Mike: OK
Chico: Your nearest opponent has $13,800. You find the Daily Double under the penultimate clue in the round.
Chico: Do you want to put it away or play it safe?
Mike: It depends on the category. And it depends on the opposition too. If I'm ahead of Kevin Joyce, I go for the kill.
Chico: This is not a Kevin Joyce game. $1600 They Will Come (only the $2000 clue remains) Though, if you put it away (not swaying you), you take out the champ.
Mike: OK. I'm just saying if Kevin Joyce was an opponent...
Chico: Right. Gotcha.
Mike: You have to size up your competition as well as the material. I'd go for the kill. My wager would be $12,100 if I wanted to seal it up.
Chico: Okay. The clue...

In 2005 dozens of heads of state & millions of pilgrims went to his funeral.

Mike: Who is Pope John Paul II?
Chico: Good! You just took out the champ. Michael only bets $2000.
Mike: Oops.
Chico: Because remember the cardinal rule... You play to win ALWAYS.
Mike: Precisely
Chico: Because if you play not to lose... What happens?
Mike: You're going to lose
Chico: Good.
Chico: You get all that, Gordon? You play to lose... You LOSE.

(EVIL)

Gordon: You mean like you're losing in followers? Ha HA! And speaking of losers, let's move to Survivor, and...



Gordon: Brendan is the latest moron in the series, as he gets voted out with an immmunity Idol in his pocket.
Jason: May I get on my soapbox for one second?
Gordon: Soapbox is yours, Mr. Block.
Jason: Thank you. Gordon...has the immunity Idol ever been played? Because it seems recently...people who have the idol...haven't played it because they thought they were safe.
Gordon: It has. In Survivor Micronesia. we have seen how TO play the Idol. However, we have once again seen how NOT to play the idol. The worst player being James, who left while holding TWO of them. And then there's Erik, who gave his immunity away and then promptly got voted out.
Jason: No kidding. Brendan thinks he is safe...and then get blindsided. If you have the Idol....STOP BEING A WUSS. Play it. It's been all talk and no stones. Thank you.
Gordon: It was a good blindside, but Brendan got a bit too cocky and should have played the Idol just in case the votes weren't in his way. He didn't, and out he goes. But now - was this the best move by the group?
Jason: Maybe. Coach was annoying but he produces.
David: It never is when its we're down to a merged tribe. It's not voting out who should go. It's voting out who is the biggest threat.
Gordon: If I'm Taj and Stephen and JT, no. That's a terrible move, because now, you'll be in the minority for the rest of the time. If you played the game out to the final 5, they would have a 3-2 majority over Brendan and Sierra. But they didn't, and now, unless they somehow find a crack (Sierra), they are going to get picked off by Coach and company.
Jason: I think so.
Gordon: We move from Morons on an island to morons on a dance floor. America's National Nightmare was voted off Dancing With The Stars, as Steve-O exited, stage right. And now with his thoughts, Mr. JD Hernandez.
JD: LOL, he's not a moron...... totally. But I am SO glad to see him leave. And I'm happiest that we don't have a repeat of last year where the worst dancer stays on for far too many weeks. (read: Leachman, Cloris)
Gordon: So of who we have left up there, who's the most evil who should be leaving, stage left, out of the remaining people: Shawn Johnson, Lil Kim, Gilles Marini, Ty Murray, Melissa Rycroft, Lawrence Taylor, and Chuck Wicks.
JD: Gilles is pure evil. With that menacing glare (especially on the Paso Doble) and his bare chest.... he's pure evil.
Gordon: Oooh. I like pure evil. But should he be leaving next?
JD: No way.
Gordon: Who should be next?
JD: I think Lawrence and Edyta should go next, with Ty and Chelsie right behind them.
Gordon: Lawrence has not been very good. In my mind (and correct me if Im wrong, JD), but Lawrence has been the worst NFL-er to be on the show.
JD: LT has been.... okay. But he's not Warren Sapp or Jerry Rice or Emmitt Smith or Anthony Koutoufides. (Kouto was the Aussie Rules footballer who won their season 3)
Jason: Not even close
JD: LT has been the worst of the ex-NFL players. Not to say he's bad. But he's not that great, either. I agree with Jason that Ty should leave soon, too.
Gordon: I agree.
Jason: I think Melissa Rycroft is going to win it all
JD: o_0...WHA? Let's hear your reasons, Block!
Jason: Simple...she has been the most consistent...and the public loves a good revenge story.
JD: I think it's too close to call between Shawn Johnson, Lil Kim, and Gilles. Personally, I think some of Melissa's scores are a little high. Not to say the judges are giving her a beneficial score because she was on an ABC-network show.
Gordon: I agree - but we could see a repeat of Season 1.
JD: So there's going to be a rematch between Gilles and Melissa? And.... dare I say.... a wardrobe malfunction?
Jason: Woo hoo
Gordon: And speaking of malfunctions, heeeeere's Chico!

(Good)

Chico: I'm wondering if Gordon had a big winner to talk about down there. I have a big winner.
Mike: Is anybody in the dungeon a winner?
Chico: I'd say so, but not everyone in the dungeon has $100,000. Take one Drew McGaffain, a junior at Temple who wants to go to grad school. Thanks to Wheel.. now he can.
Mike: Nice
Chico: The bonus puzzle is a Thing... Here's your puzzle...

T I _ H T / _ R _ S P

Mike: Tight grasp?
Chico: Didn't even need 30 seconds.
Mike: It's right there
Chico: It is.
Mike: And Drew's going to grad school now. Very nice.
Chico: Very nice indeed. Best of luck to him. But even so... could've had a million were it another episode, when a million dollars was in play.
Chico: Let's punch up the puzzle. It's another THING...

_ _ R T _ _ / C _ _ S E

Chico: And you want me to say "Here's your 30 seconds?"
Mike: I could probably be here for 30 minutes and not get it. Something CHASE?
Chico: Nope, it was a WORTHY CAUSE.
Mike: If the A was picked, it's solveable.
Chico: No million... and no Beetle convertible for Kelsey Ospiornson either.
Mike: Not everybody wins, sadly.
Chico: At least she doesn't have a dungeon to play in...isn't that right, G?

(EVIL)

Gordon: A young lady creating a stir is always fun. Now what about a lady significantly older?
Jason: You mean The Cougar?
JD: Hehe, always fun. ;-)
Gordon: I do mean the Cougar. Now Chico, being that he's Mr. Good and Happy Happy, has taken this show (being that it's a Mike Fleiss creation) and has thrown it to the realm of evil for us to review.
Jason: Ah yes. Stacey, a 40 yr old divorcee and mother of 4...is looking at 20 younger men to date.
Gordon: Add some Mike Fleiss, stir and serve chilled for a set of episodes. Now let's talk about The Good here: and yes there is good. It's done professionally. They know what they are doing, and the technical values of the show are better than what it should be, That being said, for The Bad, hereeee's Jason!
Gordon: lol

	THE COUGAR - TV Land
	GORDON	JASON	ALEX	DAVID	EVIL AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	D-	D-	A ZILLION A's	*BARFS*	D-

Jason: It's incredibly formulaic. You have the opening contest to get into the house...the get to know you party...and the kiss off, where you have people try to kiss her mouth, which is gross. And the biggest a-hole gets to stay on at the end. Grade: D-.
Alex: I give it a zillion A's!
Jason: You suck. LOL
Don: lol
Gordon: I have some A's for it.
Jason: Go on
Gordon: Awful, Asinine, Acerbic and Absolute Atrociousness.
David: *grabs the barf bag*
Gordon: There's some A's. The grade, however, is a D-.
Don: I'm not surprised.
Gordon: Would you be surprised if I said that the Hamsters are setting up their own dating show?
David: Please tell me you're kidding Gordon
Gordon: Unfortunately, I'm not. Eve is looking for a few good young hamsters.
David: Anyone need a barf bag?
Gordon: I could go on, but I think that would be too evil, even for Chico.
Jason: Yes.
Don: Indeed.
Gordon: Roll that Beautiful Brain Footage

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Thanks, Gordon. Now start it up...
Gordon: Well fine then. First up - Evil Datebook!

Cash Cab shows up on Monday, where Ben Bailey mercilessly throws people out on the streets.

Jason: Yay Ben Bailey

Then The Phone is on April 21st, where people risk their lives for a small stipend of money.

David: oy
Jason: Looking forward to that one.
Chico: Alright. Now let me get my bat... Hey Gordon, can you toss my bat?
Gordon: Here. Have the evil metal spikey version (throws it up from the dungeon)...
Chico: Thanks...

Remember all those months ago the SAG was threatening to strike, meaning "This Season Suck Part 2, electric Boogaloo"?

Mike: I do.
Chico: Not soo... err, so.

The SAG and the AMPTP have reached a tentative agreement, averting the thr= eat of an actor's strike. And also bringing to a halt any plans for "My Dad is Better Than Your Dad" season 2.

Mike: Oh darn! *dripping with sarcasm*
Chico: i know you're just dying inside. But hey... I got something that'll perk you right up. It's this week's Greenlight.
Mike: Hit me with it, Chico.

CBS has given the go-ahead for Season 15 of The Amazing Race.

Mike: Excellent!
Chico: It's good stuff.
Mike: The best reality show, hands down.
Chico: Totally.
Mike: Have casting calls been announced?
Chico: Yep.
Mike: Super.
Chico: Teams are traveling the country and applications are being taken at cbs.com/amazing race. I wonder if Gordon has a team...
Gordon: I not only have a team of evil, I have a team of stupid people. Who wants some smart cake?
Jason: I do!
Don: Sure, why not?
Joe: Mmm cake

Are YOU Smarter than...John-Anthony Cavanagh, who apparently likes to whittles sticks to build a tent.

Gordon: Now Don, I believe this is your neck of the woods.
Don: Indeed. This was on Tuesday's Millionaire. For $500...

"Whittle a stick to a sharp point" is one of the first steps in which of these traditional camping activities?

A: Roasting marshmallows
B: Cleaning a fish
C: Collecting firewood
D: Pitching a tent

Jason: Um...A?
Don: Yep. John-Anthony, on the other hand, said D.
Gordon: If I'm whittling a stick to pitch a tent, chances are the tent is going to collapse on me when I try to get in it.
Jason: No kidding
Gordon: John Anthony leaves with nothing. Let's continue the misery here...

Are YOU Smarter than...Seth, who walks off with $1,000...instead of $26,000, which he should have won on Catch 21

Gordon: Seth decided to make all of the cards equal to 10...which means that he'd need 3 of the 4 aces in the deck to win.
Joe: In a word: dumb
Jason: Way dumb
Gordon: The whole Idea is to add cards to get to 11, because then you have around a 33% chance to catch 21, and not a 2% chance.
Jason: There you go
Gordon: Here's the sad part, If he played optimal with the cards coming out, he would have WON the $25,000.
Jason: Ouch
David: Ouch ouch
Don: Big ouch.
Alex: Huge ouch
Joe: Some large magnitude of ouch
Gordon: Maybe some Haterade will help
Jason: Lets do it
Don: Alright.
Gordon: You know about those upfronts that the networks are showing everyone?
Jason: Yes.

Not on the Upfronts: Opportunity Knocks, That's Amore!, Duel, High School Musical: Get in the Picture, The Mole, and Wanna Bet? All of which have been officially cancelled this week.

Jason: Oh man!
Gordon: Which means it's only fitting that we see this:



Jason: Scary.
Alex: *cries*
Gordon: Haterade for everybody! And here's Chico with some ridiculous soppy story.
Chico: Thanks a lot... Next up, something that could classify as Global... AND Fully Loaded... AND a Media Ho.
Mike: A fully loaded global media ho? Are we allowed to say that on WLTI?
Chico: We are now.

Last week, you didn't know about a Scottish crazy cat lady who's never been kissed by the name of Susan Boyle. Thanks to YouTube, you can't get rid of the "Britain's Got Talent" contestant.

Mike: She's everywhere. She's been the top story at CNN.com for at least 2 days.
Chico: Seriously, I haven't see a bigger to-do about a middle-aged person since "The 40 Year Old Virgin"
Mike: Ouch. Just thinking about that waxing segment from that movie. Kelly Clarkson...
Chico: Heh. Still, though. It's good to see someone like her get the attention that she is. I hope she puts it to good use...It lets the world know that "average" still matters
Mike: How could she not know she has this amazing God-given talent for her entire life? That's what baffles me.
Chico: I don't think it's a matter of knowing, as it is a matter of coming out of her shell and doing something with it.
Mike: Good point.
Chico: Very good.
Chico: Now for some lesser-deserving hoes, here's Gordon...
Gordon: Who's up for some lesser-deserving hoes?
Jason: I am!
Gordon: Play me some music!
Jason: (plays *pimpin All Over the World* by Ludacris)

In this week's Media Ho Report, Gilles Marini is getting surgery, Kenley Collins's charges are reduced, Simon Cowell downplays rumors he's leaving Idol next year...Deal Or No Deal's Lindsay gets engaged, Drew Carey hangs out with Bob Barker on this week's TPIR, and Jillian Michaels supports her contestants.

Gordon: But none of them are the hoes of the week.
Jason: Who are the evil hoes?
Gordon: First evil ho: Susan Boyle, and her evil presence from Britain's Got Talent as she permeates the US.
Alex: It made me feel really pathetic how much this story and video got to me
Gordon: I'm sure you've all seen her YouTube clip, right?
Alex: Yes
Jason: And the video just killed me.
Don: Yes.
Jason: Some people are calling shenanigans...but I think those people are all heartless evil people LOL
Alex: It literally made me feel less like a man how much it moved me
Gordon: Second Evil Ho: Former Governor Rod Blagojevich, who is now considered to be one of the contestants for 'I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here'. Are you kidding me?
Jason: AH!
Alex: As if my interest in this show couldn't be any less
Don: I feel the urge to hit my head against the wall after hearing that.
Alex: I never thought I'd be begging for Jay Leno's thing to start. Ever. As long as this just goes away.
Gordon: And now - an evil casting couch.

If you wish to be part of the newest season of the controversial Project Runway, go here:
http://www.bunim-murray.com/index.php?session=casting&id=17

Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Chico: And finally, let's Go Global to Spain...You remember when Inside the Box was on TV, right?
Mike: Ryan does.
Chico: It was big in Canada... when it hit the US... not so much. I believe the reaction was "You replaced Crosswords for THIS?"

Well, the show is headed to Spain now.

Mike: We still have Crosswords.
Chico: Tricon Films & Television has closed a deal that sees Spanish outfit Redacción 7 producing a local version of the show, to air on Canal Sur 2.
Mike: From a Canadian cable channel to US syndication and now to Spain. Not a bad deal.
Chico: Not a bad deal indeed. Shows you what stick-to-itiveness gets you. So wish the Spanish more luck than we got.
Mike: It's simple, there's play along value, and the stakes were not that huge.
Chico: There you go.
Mike: Inexpensive fun TV.
Chico: And hip, too. Okay, that's Brainvision... *knocks* Hey Gordon, shut it down in there!
Gordon: You heard him. Shut it down.
Jason: Shutting down.
Gordon: When we come back, it's time to vent out our evilness.
Jason: I cant wait
Gordon: But first, you have to be subjected to Chico and a happy game. This is WLTI. You give us 22 minutes, we'll give you a cadre of evil, disgruntled fan boys.
Chico: And something dark, dank, and slimy.
Mike: From the dungeon?
Chico: From the dungeon.
Mike: Yuck.

(Brainvision is brought to you by Inside the Even Smaller Box, the show that tests your knowledge of viral video... everything from the Leave Britney Alone guy to the Chocolate Rain guy to the chick who sang "I Dreamed a Dream")

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