Episode 20.6
February 16

Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and Happy Valentines Day! This is where people with social lives go out and do things romantic...which explains why Chico and I are here on a Saturday night alone :P.
Chico: It's okay...It's a contrived holiday, anyway. It's a money-making operation co-opted by card companies, lingerie companies, restaurants, and flower arrangers to take what's left of your Christmas cash.
Gordon: I'm in love with my game shows. I don't have to take them out for dinner. They are cheap dates, and they pleasure me continuously. And if it's Show Me Your Wits, they satisfy me in...that way, too.
Chico: Okay, that's another game for another show. I'm in love with talking about game shows... And if you're like me... then prepare to be turned on...
Gordon: So From somewhere in Jim Lange's sound studio set, this week's edition of WLTI...is...ON!
Chico: Yay! Just think of this as the My Bloody Valentine edition of the show.
Gordon: Not a bad flick, either. Chico and Gordon here, to discuss the week of Game Show happenings. And while we're talking about holidays that neither of us believe in, let's get Friday's TPIR out of the way.
Chico: Yep. Last Friday, history is made again as couples play the game. Happened on Wheel...Happened on Deal...Happened on Millionaire...Now it happened on TPIR. You had dating/engaged/married couples playing the games we know and love. Let's start with the good...First of all... it's an idea whose time had come. I mean, it's ingenious, it's fresh, it adds a little added depth to the proceedings.
Gordon: Definitely. It took nothing away from the game play. And for the most part, they played well.
Chico: And hey, you got a proposal out of it. Granted, it would've been better had it been recorded for posterity. Other than that, it was just TPIR with a lot of hearts around.
Gordon: And once again, creative showcases.
Chico: Yep. Not only that, a creative prize offer or two. I believe this is the first time since the Bill Cullen era that a refurbished auto was on offer. A vintage '75 Corvette Stingray, no less.
Gordon: And it's a nice Vintage Stingray...though I doubt it's something they are going to want to drive, so it's a $22,000 art exhibit.
Chico: Unless, you know, they're into that sort of thing and they know a good detailer.
Gordon: But now the bad.
Chico: Drew was... typically Drew. That's not good, by the way.
Gordon: We go back to bad 'I don't Care' Drew.
Chico: Yep.
Gordon: Secondly, a car in Lucky 7 at $21,395. That's brutal for a Lucky 7 game. 9 and a 1 in the same game - ugly
Chico: If the 1 is in the #2 slot, you could possibly swing it, but a 9 anywhere in Lucky Seven is brutal.
Gordon: A Pnuchboard that only yields out $50.
Chico: And a $50,000+ Showcase that goes unclaimed.
Gordon: Not to mention an unnatural desire by Drew on Rich Fields goatee. More so on the goatee than the contestants.
Chico: Yeah, about that. Listen... brother... Rich has a goatee. No need to mention it every chance you get. It's a nice goatee... but still... Once is enough.
Gordon: All in all, it was a good show, which is good as we go into something that's not so good.
Chico: What's not so good, Gordon?
Gordon: We have said, for the longest time, that we wanted to see the ratings for TPIR
Chico: Ah.
Gordon: Thanks to our buddies on Golden-road.net, we finally get them. And they aren't good. Big Bored, please?

Gordon: The Subject: As The Stomach Turns
Chico: Okay, let's set up our vantage points here.
Gordon: We're talking about this week's ratings, compared to the past 3 years. 2006's ratings...4.0. Now in Daytime, a 4.0 is an awesome rating.
Chico: Right. So what happened in 2007, Bob's last year?
Gordon: 2007. Bob's last year. 4.45 rating. Huge. Bob finishes out his tenure with The Price is Right as the #1 show in Daytime.
Chico: Again, that's very good. Score a 4.0 even and you're pretty much assured a renewal.
Gordon: 2008. Drew's first year. 3.7. Still a good number. Still #1 in Daytime, and all things considered, still good.
Chico: As for the season thus far...
Gordon: The 3.7 wasn't good enough for Fremantle, so bye bye Roger Dobkowitz. The peak this week - a 2.8. During the year, it's been averaging anywhere from a 2.8-3.2. That's around a 20% drop. Not good.
Chico: Now you could theoretically call a show with even a 2.0 a hit (See Deal or No Deal). But it's not the hit that it once was. And Drew Carey is not the host he once was. And the show is not the show it once was.
Gordon: The people have spoken about this season's TPIR. And they don't like what they see.
Chico: If you ask me, the litmus test will be next year this time, when there's no free-standing variable.
Gordon: I think it gets renewed, but I think next year is going to be the test for this regime. Another drop like this and this is either the last season for this regime, or the last season, period.
Chico: Either Fremantle admits they made a mistake (something that they've NEVER done in the past) or fish or cut baits.
Gordon: They better do something, because they are losing to The View.
Chico: They better hope that pregnancy mellows out Elisabeth Hasselbeck (also something that's NEVER happened). Perhaps a little controversy is in order - like a player who shouldn't have been interviewed with Mr. Blits in the first place. Bridget Jackson, a player who got called down, but never got up on stage to play... got carded. You see, in the world of the game show, there are things called "eligibility requirements". You have to meet them in order to get the prize. Take for example... Joanna Pacitti.
Gordon: Hello, transition.
Chico: Heh. The eligibility requirements for American Idol are about as clear as mud. 1) You can't have a current recording and/or management contract. 2) You can't be connected with anyone at 19, FremantleMedia, Fox, or people named Ryan Seacrest. That includes affiliates and immediate family members. And of course, 3) You have to be an American citizen aged 16-28 at the time of your first audition. Meet all three, your golden. Now that I've set it up, Gordon, knock it down, please.
Gordon: Well, Joanna violated #2. She knew people at 19 Entertainment to the point that she called some of them her best friends. That would be good enough reason to be DQ'ed. And of course the fact that when it came to remembering lyrics, she had a mind like a sieve didn't help her cause either.
Chico: So they're basically doing her a solid then.
Gordon: They may be. I'm not sure she was ready for Prime Time. She looked like another Kristy Lee Cook in the making.
Chico: A ringer that may have rung too many times, if you will. The official reason, quoting a source close to AI, says that she was dismissed to avoid any impropriety.
Gordon: I don't think that should be held against her, If you want to pursue your dreams, you should do whatever it takes to get there.
Chico: Yeah, but at the same time, rules are rules. You want to play the game, you have to play by the rules.
Gordon: True. What about the rules of Survivor?
Chico: Simple. 1) Survive. 2) Win challenges. C) Don't piss anyone off. You never know who's holding all the cards. And finally 4) assume nothing. Case in point, the first vote.
Gordon: Let's be simpler, as we have our first edition of....



Chico: Now when you heard that phrase in the teasers, what went through your mind?
Gordon: They will be in the game, just not in that trek to camp. Uncle Jeffy never said they'd be out.
Chico: Good. That would be the correct assumption. Because this is Survivor we're talking about and anything Jeff says should only be taken at face value.
Gordon: Right. Now the interesting thing here is that the 2 people who get sent to camp have clues to find the immunity idol. As of right now, neither of them have it. Now Sandy, who is all by herself and who doesn't find the idol, is all ready to be sent packing. When you have someone who is clearly the target, what's the worst thing you can possibly do?
Chico: Give the group a reason change their target. Carolina... makes herself a bigger target. She gets... a little bossy. And by a little, I mean "CRAZY BOSSY"
Gordon: Right. Or In this case, it's Carolina opening up her big mouth, which made people realize how useless she is around camp. Hence, she gets voted out and is the first moron to be here.
Chico: Not only that...She's a UNANIMOUS pick, which shows how eager the tribe was to get rid of her. Amazing, isn't it?
Gordon: Sure is. do you find Deal or No Deal just as amazing this week?
Chico: It's amazing that we got out of it alive.
Gordon: We start with a Deal or No Deal no no. Pat McGee gets this board -

$10, $5,000, $100,000, $500,000
OFFER: $86,000

Chico: Book says to go.
Gordon: Sure does. Pat doesn't. DEAL for $86,000. Next 21 cases to go - $5,000 and $10, leaving both big cases up on the board. And yes, Pat had the $500,000.
Chico: That one hurts.
Gordon: Tuesday. Tiffany Collins plays it right, waits until there's only 1 big case and walks with $101,000. Inside her case...$300.
Chico: Good job
Gordon: Wednesday and Thursday features 2 players who go too far. Gia Nilsson wins $10 and Rocco DeNobli wins $50.
Chico: But at least we ended on a high note with Roy Renkin.
Gordon: Renkin wins $26,000, which is the most he could have won in his show. So in a strange week of DOND, we get wins between $10 and $101,000.
Chico: That's enough to buy a Union Jack flag and enough to see one up close in the UK.
Gordon: Are we going to Hedsor Hall?
Chico: Yep. Apparently there are girls there. The dangerous, frisky type. Your favorite.
Gordon: And what's wrong with that? :)
Chico: I didn't say nothing was wrong with that. You hear me say that?
Gordon: No, but you can hear me say that there's plenty wrong with the show.
Chico: And you can hear me agree. Let's start with the obvious. We've seen this done before and scores better with Charm School.
Gordon: Not just that, but they introduce alcohol into the mix. How well do you think these ladies - or anyone - is going to react with alcohol in the mix?
Chico: Rather drunkedly..
Gordon: No. We've seen the formula work. Nothing else here does.

	THE GIRLS OF HEDSOR HALL - MTV
	CHICO	GORDON	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	F	F	EPIC FAIL

Chico: Yep. And can I play the role of J-Block for a moment?
Gordon: Sure!
Chico: They've gone all the way to Britain to shake a problem that they have. One of them which is alcohol...so what happens when MTV sends them over? They serve alcohol. They don't want to change lives. They want to get ratings. An F on principle.
Gordon: I'll go F, too. So what about season 2 of From G's to Gents?
Chico: It's the same old song with a different singer. We have G's who want to make themselves into gents for fear of landing in jail or WORSE.
Gordon: I'm looking to change the CD. And...oh. no. Why does The Chairman Hamster have a G shaved on his back?
Chico: He's trying to keep it hood.
Gordon: And on cue, Gordon Jr. comes in with a hood. I blame Jason Block for this. He thinks just because it's his birthday weekend that he's too good for this show and he lets the hamsters run wild.
Chico: Someone needs to come and corral these hoodlums. Okay, before we get ourselves in trouble with the American Humane Association AGAIN...
Gordon: I'll get the hamster cages. Meanwhile. Roll That Beautiful Brain Footage

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Thanks, Doug. First up... I've got a Green Light. Gordon, you'll love this. Hot girls. Scary places. E!'s got both of them.
Gordon: I'm listening :)

They're airing the special $10,000 competition "Hot Girls in Scary Places" on March 13. It's a special being aired as a backdoor pilot.

Chico: Now here's your quick business lesson. A backdoor pilot is a pilot of a show that is intended as a one-off for broadcast. If it is successful, they turn around and make it into a regular thing, hence the term, "backdoor".
Gordon: So if enough of us watch it, it walks through the front door.
Chico: Right on. But it's basically a show filmed as a one-off so it can be broadcast if not picked up as a series.
Gordon: Right. And here's a series that will be broadcast.

Though it's not on just yet, PLEASE watch The Amazing Race starting February 15th. Please please please.

Chico: You'll watch the Race and like it. Meanwhile, also this week is the return of Millionaire after a fortnight of reruns... with Cat Deeley at the helm
Gordon: Meow.
Chico: We know she's hot. We know she can host a reality competition on Fox...But can she front a hard quiz? We will find out together.
Gordon: I think she can. And if not, she can get fully loaded.
Chico: You'll love what I got this week.

Endless Games is coming out with a new deluxe edition of The Newlywed Game. Not quite sure if it's timed to the new version of the TV show "(coming April 6)... but there you go

Gordon: it probably is.
Chico: Great piece of timing.
Gordon: What about a bad piece of reading?
Chico: I'm scared, daddy.

Are YOU Smarter than...Bryon and Kimberly Brown, who let $17,350 go bye-bye on Wheel of Fortune.

Gordon: This would be Song Lyrics, from Wheel of Fortune's Friday Show. Here's the puzzle.

_ O _ N _ / TO / THE / _ H A _ E L / AND / _ E ' _ E /
_ O N N A / _ E T / _ A _ _ _ E D

Chico: I say "GOING TO THE CHAPEL AND WE'RE GONNA GET MARRIED"
Gordon: Good job. Now what did Byron say?
Chico: Byron... so proper... he said "Going to the chapel and we're going to get married"
Gordon: Very proper. Very incorrect.
Chico: Say what's on the board, not what's in your head.
Gordon: Bye bye $10,050 and $7,300 worth of trip. Staying with this show, you want some Haterade?
Chico: Yes.
Gordon: Here's the bonus puzzle:

_ _ _ / _ E N C _

Gordon: It's a thing
Chico: It's a bench of some sort...Is it an OAK BENCH?
Gordon: It IS an Oak Bench
Chico: Yay, oak bench.
Gordon: Good for you...

Bad for Byron and Kimberly, who do make it to the Bonus Round...and then see the fact that they lost $100,000. Total amount of stuff lost for them: $117,350.

Chico: Ouch. That's enough for a world tour.
Gordon: Sure is. Where are we going?
Chico: Indonesia.

Their parliament is seeking to ban text-and-wins.

Chico: Because, "The shows charge exorbitant phone and text messaging rates". AND that it all amounts to illegal gambling
Gordon: I don't disagree with that
Chico: Nope. Basically not running this sort of thing properly
Gordon: We saw what happened with that garbage in the US.
Chico: Yep. It done imploded.
Gordon: Do Media Hoes implode?
Chico: Yep. Often with disastrous results.
Gordon: But... Chico, would you like to go to bed on a red sofa?
Chico: Does it have a hide-a-bed?
Gordon: It could
Chico: ...Nice

E! is currently casting a fun new game show where contestants try to convince a panel of celebrity judges they've had plastic surgery.

Each episode features three contestants, only one of whom has actually had plastic surgery. Through a series of questions, interviews, and physical activities, the judges decide who they think has had "work done."

The 3 contestants must use their looks and story telling abilities to convince the judges they've had the surgery. The person who the judges think has had plastic surgery wins the prize.
http://www.realitywanted.com/call/4083-new-pilot-for-e-channel-now-casting-for-a-fun-new-game-show

Chico: Good times.
Gordon: And now, for the hoes.
Chico: *plays "Pimpin' All Over the World"*

America's Next Top Model winner CariDee English will host Pretty Wicked, Kelly Choi will host Top Chef - Masters, Julianne Hough gets to sing The Star Spangled Banner for the Daytona 500...Colin Quinn plays New Haven, Ryan Seacrest reveals that he originally auditioned to be a judge, not the host, and Tim Gunn will co-host ABC's Oscars Red Carpet coverage.

Gordon: But none of them are your hoes for the week. The hoes are...your 7 American Idol winners, as they all show up to promote Disneyworld's new American Idol Experience.
Chico: Call it a family reunion of sorts.
Gordon: It is. strange family.
Chico: We have out of work uncles, crazy cousins, and David Cook.
Gordon: And those...are your hoes
Chico: Okay, Brainvision is done.
Gordon: Shut it down.
Chico: Still to come, we advance two spaces to a Whammy. But first... 36 singers. Who has what it takes to get to the top 12? And then to the top 4? And then to the final? And then to the money? Find out after this. This is WLTI. Give us 36 singers, we'll give you a competition.

(Brainvision is brought to you by... BIZARRO RICH!)

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