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Previous Episodes (Season 32)
December 24/31 - 2012 Year In Review / Push or Flush (1)

January 7 - Gordon & Chico Meet the Beast / Resolutions / Push Or Flush (2)

January 14 - Big Moments Other Than Chico's Let's Ask America Win / 6 Things We Think You Should Know / Push Or Flush (3)

January 21 - Real Annoyances & Fake Girlfriends / ! / Ask the Doctor

February 11 - Heroes & Zeroes / Read Between the Lines / Bachelor #1

March 4 - A Big Idea / Maximum Strength Capsule Reviews / Welcome to Hollywood

March 11 - Groundhog Stew / Really Big Boards

March 18 - The Alex Trebek Sweepstakes, Part 1 / March Madness / Bargainhunters

March 25 - The Alex Trebek Sweepstakes, Part 2 / Heads or Tails / This, That or The Other
 


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Episode 32.8 - No Love, All Fools
April 1

Chico: Hello, everyone. This is Chico Alexander, and I've got some sad news...
Gordon: (Pulls out hankies)
Chico: After 440 episodes, this will be our final broadcast. We've had a blast doing it, and I think you've had a blast watching us, and I think Gordon's going to need a hug here...
Gordon: Well, no. I'll be replacing Chico with an intern from Duke University. With Chico's blessings.
Chico: ... that's the business.
Gordon: Just because we won About.com's Best Game Show Web site for 3 straight years. UNC lost, so...out Chico goes.
Chico: So again, thanks for reading and... umm.. Gordon, you have a datebook. What's today again?
Gordon: Today is March 32nd...or April 1.
Chico: APRIL FOOLS! :-)
Gordon: HA HA HA HA HA
Chico: Naw, man, we ain't going nowhere!
Gordon: Unfortunately, some people this week will only wish their appearance on a game show was an April Fools.
Chico: And we'll talk about that, because from somewhere in Canada... the Game Show Times... is... on. =p
Gordon: YAY! Gordon here, and We'll get to fools later, but first we have a Wheel of Fortune Tragedy.


(DIVIDED by 10)

Chico: The tragedy was on Wednesday's show. You had Jason Dingus, playing for his deceased grandma, who died watching this show, truly heart-tugging story. Jason completely owns the front game with $18,428 in cash and trip to Hawaii. Then he gets into the bonus and gets hammered by this PLACE.

_ _ _ T _ / _ _ _ T _

Chico: He picks the Y D C A... and gets no love from the board. Gordon, what do you think?
Gordon: Well it could be 2 things.
Chico: go on.
Gordon: It could be a Filth Party. I hear UNC people went there when the Tar Heels lost in the tourney last week.
Chico: Gordon... there was no Y. Contact high from a Duke education, no doubt.
Gordon: Silence, mere mortal. It could also be a Photo Booth, so we'll go with that.
Chico: Yep, it was a PHOTO BOOTH. No love... also no money. He had the $100,000 envelope.
Gordon: Ouch.
Chico: This is the third time it's happened this season, and it doesn't get any easier to watch.
Gordon: It doesn't. There's been no one that has lost the million this way which is good. However, there has been a time on TPIR where someone hasd the Pattern in Pay The Rent right - and didn't go for it. After this week, you can make it 2.



Chico: That is always painful, when you see someone play the game right, then lose.
Gordon: Set it up, sir.
Chico: Okay, your six items of import are...

Dreyer's Orange Cream Sherbet
A 15-pack of Doublemint gum
Folger's instant coffee
French's frenchfried onions
Francesco Rinaldi pasta sauce
and Nissin beef Cup Noodles.


Chico: And I'll tell you how Reeshemah Hall did it after you lock in your picks sir.
Gordon: Well first, we go most expensive, which is the folgers
Chico: Folgers in the attic
Gordon: Then we'll go something sort of expensive on the bottom, which would be the pasta sauce.
Chico: Pasta sauce on the bottom.
Gordon: The Pasta Sauce
Chico: Pasta sauce.
Gordon: Then we pair up a high prices item with a low price item, In this case, Onions and Noodles and the Dreyers and the Wrigleys. So my house is... Pasta Sauce
Chico: Floor 1?
Gordon: Frenchs and Nissin
Chico: Floor #2 with Gum and sherbet then, right?
Gordon: Right.
Chico: And coffee on top. Sounds like the ingredients of the most lethal sundae ever.
Gordon: Take that, chopped chefs.
Chico: Okay, let's take a look. The sauce... $2.29.
Chico: So right now, no matter what happens, you have $1000. Next... the onions and the ramen. Onions are $3.39. Ramen: 59c. Total: $3.98. So right now, $5000. Good job so far.
Gordon: Whoo hoo!
Chico: Next, the Sherbet and the gum. Sherbet: $5.79. Gum: $1.09.
Total: $6.88. So you have $10,000.
Gordon: We're going for it
Chico: The coffee... for $100,000.... $9.99!
Gordon: YAY!
Chico: So that's ONE way of doing it. What Resheemah did...basically pair the bigs with the smalls, but she put the smallest of the products in the bottom, the cup noodles. This is the real beauty of this game is that there's more than one way to solve it.
Gordon: Well yes and no. There's more than one way if the producers deem so, in this case, there were at least 8 ways to do this, which is the Producer's way of saying 'Someone take the damn money'.
Chico: Reeshemah did it, But there's a thing called followthrough. Fortune favors the bold, you have to take some risk playing the game if you want all that sweet sweet honey.
Gordon: True, though $10,000 is a lot of money to risk.
Chico: For $100,000? Not really. The risk is big, but the payoff is VERY nice.
Gordon: Someone who's risked $10,000 before is one Jason Block, who joins us wearing a string bikini. Ew.
Chico: CAN'T UNSEE! CAN'T UNSEE!
Jason: It's warm :)
Chico: ...yuck. Speaking of not sexy. Phillip Sheppard survives another round.
Jason: Not cool. This was another example of...



Chico: So here's what we're looking at.... another round of Survivor and another two fans are going on the block. With no explanation as to why Phillip Sheppard, whose stock value is at -0.9 at the moment... is sticking around.
Gordon: There's a number of explanations as to why. Whether you like him or not, him and Corinne an the other favorites are playing a smart game. You have to get rid of the fans before turning on yourselves. unlike the fans mentality, the favorites realize you have to make your your group has the numbers to get to the end game before starting an end game strategy.
Jason: I don't disagree.
Chico: Neither do I, and it's a smart game now, but here's the thing...the merge is coming.
Jason: Next week.
Chico: Right. Now the focus shifts on the end game, as in a) who do I want sitting next to me for $1 million, and 2) who's going to be the best to get me there.
Gordon: Not yet. You have Prologue) Duck Hunt out the Fan Boys and Fan Girls



Chico: Right. The favorites are voting in a tight tight TIGHT bloc. And the fans, bless their little fanboy hearts, are not seeing that, or they ARE seeing that but not acting on it.
Gordon: They can't really act on it. They don't have the numbers. The first person to get a split block and draw a favorite oro 2 in wins. The problem with the strategy though is this - you CANNOT under ANY circumstances let a fan get to the end. Conversely, taking Philip with you could hand you the million
Jason: Of course it could.
Chico: But part of the game is you have to live with the guy. I'd rather live with head lice.
Gordon: If it's worth a million, I can deal with him for 21 more days
Jason: Me too. Phillip is the perfect guy to take for the money
Chico: He's less James Bond, more Maxwell Smart.
Jason: bingo
Chico: I have to wonder if that's him or if that's the cameras. But in any event, Julia Landauer, another fan wishing for two weeks of her life back.
Gordon: She's on the wrong edge of the fan alliance and the wrong end of the split tribe.
Chico: Indeed. Meanwhile, we're splitting the audience for talent shows this week. Which means it's time for another... (rumble rumble)...



Jason: DUM DUM DUM!
Gordon: We start with the new show - The Voice. What do you think of our new celebrities?
Chico: Well, the one thing Usher and Shakira prove is that this show is not judge dependent. Christina and Cee-Lo, they're good... Usher & Shakira, they're just as good.
Jason: Exactly. Rotating judges give a fresh look.
Chico: And the interplay between the players in the chairs is just as good as ever. Maybe even better because you have the newbies vs. the vets.
Gordon: What I like is that both Sharkia and Usher have clearly done their homework. They know they have to get down and dirty with the big boys and aren't afraid to do so.
Chico: They weren't.
Jason: And aren't.
Chico: Just fit like a glove there. It's one of those shows that's geared to go the distance, and no matter what the turnover, it will. But let's turn the chair (tee hee) to the talent. Any standouts in week one? I can think of one.
Jason: Which is?
Chico: Midas Whale. A folk act in the vein of Mumford & Sons.
Jason: And the Lumineers
Gordon: (Hits Repeat Media Offender button)
Jason: Uh oh
Chico: That was our Repeat Offender alarm. Gordon loves it. :-)
Gordon: I do.
Chico: Gordon, if you will.
Gordon: Here's Midas Whale:



Gordon: Anyone look familiar?
Chico: The short boy.
Jason: Why?
Chico: American Idol 3.
Jason: There you go.
Gordon: You mean him?



Chico: Jon Peter Lewis. Pen Boy.
Gordon: It IS pen boy. He better not do A Little Less Conversation
Chico: Or he could do it... but he better not dance. But that's one act.
Gordon: And you have the both The Morgan Twins AND Colton Swon make it to Hollywood Week on American Idol.
Chico: True. But if there's one standout act for all the right reasons...Judith Hill. She once sang backup for Michael Jackson.
Jason: Another "ho-offender"
Chico: All the coaches want her. Adam gets her
Gordon: Yes, but they can both sing well and they both have the total package - which is more than you can say for the current crop of Idol contestants.



Chico: Can we bring the dog back in?
Gordon: No we can't. And Devin's exit was a fait accompli.
Chico: It was. Three strikes, you're out. That leaves two guys to get completely avalanched by five women.
Gordon: And any hope that I had for Lazaro went down the toilet when he did a number of things you can't do.
Chico: Ooh ohh! Me! Me! Righere! righere!
Gordon: Yes Chico?
Chico: He forgot words!
Gordon: He did, then he argued with the judges afterwards.
Jason: Oh boy
Gordon: Which shouldn't be a surprise to see him hanging out with Devin at the bottom.
Chico: And the judges had a lot to argue about. It was NOT a good night at all.
Gordon: It wasn't - and this is why you're show is leaking ratings like water from a sieve. You have bad singing, bad judging and boring talent.
Chico: I think this was less of a challenge, and you have to stress the challenge, otherwise, I'm questioning the legitimacy of this contest.
Gordon: I think the challenge with this group is to sing any song well.
Jason: Which is a miracle.
Gordon: It's getting borderline painful
Chico: I'll tell you something. I'm going home from trivia on Wendesday night and I'm actually DREADING what I'm going to have to sit through.
Jason: Borderline? This is DVR Cleaning time.
Chico: I'm seeing a lot of potential in two of the three girls. Candice Glover and Kree Harrison. The others... who cares.
Jason: I dont care about any of them There are people who should be there that aren't.
Gordon: I care about The Voice. Not in this group.
Chico: Agreed. I bet if you put the Voice on up against Idol this season... The Voice is going to win.
Gordon: The voice is doing everything right that Idol is doing wrong
Jason: Varied talent. Good fun judging
Chico: Great stories. That's another thing. The mark of good television is good storytelling. Watching the storytelling on Idol as it is right now it's just uncomfortable.
Jason: And it's like you are watching a mental breakdown waiting to happen
Chico: Or in Nicki's case a mental breakdown in progress.
Gordon: The last item in our Top 6 this week: DL Hughley paid someone to Gillooly Dorothy Hamill's Back - and it worked.
Chico: That's just horrible.
Jason: Ha.



Gordon: The stars danced pretty much the way we thought they would, with the exception of Hamill's back giving out. That allowed DL Hughley to torture us for another week.
Jason: Watch out for Zendaya
Chico: Watch out indeed. Remember, she dances for Disney.
Jason: This could be a breakout moment for her.
Chico: It could be. Right now, she's OWNING the competition. She's way out in front. The surprise of the season... Kellie Pickler.
Gordon: Not for me :)
Chico: You had a lot of stock in her, explain yourself.
Gordon: She's a young country entertainer. You would figure in that day and age, she's have some moves.
Chico: And she has a rockin' body to show said moves. I'm not ashamed to say it.
Gordon: She does. She'll be there for awhile. And...well...this is grotesque. I see Eve the cat dancing in a bra with
Cheeseball and Amanda the hamsters resting in each cup.
Chico: That... is... disturbing.
Jason: CAN'T UNSEE! CAN'T UNSEE!
Chico: Gordon!
Gordon: Roll That Beautiful Brain Footage

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Thanks, Doug for saving us from ... well, that. First of all, I've got a microphone bat.
Jason: HOTNESS
Gordon: (Gives Chico a Microphone Bat)
Chico: This is Talpa Media tapping into the American market.

They've already greenlit La Voz Kids for Telemundo and The Winner Is for NBC.cNow they're playing "Challenge Me, America" for Fox.

Chico: Challenge Me is a studio show where contestants with unusual talents are pushed to the brink of said talents for cash prizes.
Jason: Ah yes :)
Chico: This is ahead of MIP, and we'll have more of that in a moment, including a returning favorite of ours. Meanwhile, April 1 is going to be a game changer. Ain't that right?
Gordon: Yeppers. And it's in the Datebook.
Chico: What's in the datebook, G?

In the datebook, we get GSN new episodes of Press your Luck and the debut of Sale of the Century. These are all repeats from the 1980's, but it's a nice piece of yesteryear.

Chico: Yep. And that's not all.

If you're a fan of TPIR and LMAD, you're going to want to watch as Drew & George take over modeling, and Zonked contestants return for one more go.

Jason: Both are going to be fun and I love both ideas!
Chico: It's gonna be awesome.
Gordon: I'm looking forward to April 1. I'm also looking forward to getting loaded.
Jason: (HIC)
Chico: Zynga's back on top of the iTunes world with a game that looks... really.... familiar.

It's called "What's the Phrase". It has a puzzleboard. It has letters... There's a wheel involved...

Chico: Basically, it's Wheel of Fortune with Friends. It's a fun game, really addictive, but yeah, if I'm with Sony, I make a call.
Gordon: Every touch screen in any bar has the same concept.
Jason: That's true
Chico: And a lot of other games besides.
Gordon: So I'd call, but I probably don't have a concept case.
Chico: Probably not. So enjoy it up, kids, it's free to play. It's a timekiller for your smart phone. And now here's a dumb little time filler.
Gordon: Yes. We have, unfortunately, someone who may have been talking too much on his Dumb Phone. (wheels in Smart Board)

Are YOU Smarter Than...Justin Bieber, who gets into trouble in Germany when he has problems handling his monkey.

Jason: Aren't you supposed to do that in private?
Chico: By monkey, you mean an actual ape, right?
Gordon: Yes. He has a cute pet monkey that he brings with him to concerts. And said cute pet monkey went into Germany without the proper paperwork, so the poor monkey got to sit in an animal protection agency while Bieber was there for a week.
Jason: OUCH.
Chico: That's not the first time Justin's monkey ever got him into trouble.
Jason: Yeah
Gordon: No it's not. Especially when it misbehaves and he has to give it a spanking.
Chico: Hello.
Jason: Tip the veal...try the waitress
Chico: Maybe some Haterade will shut it up.
Jason: (puts down Mug)
Gordon: And when you spank it too much, the monkey looks like this.



Chico: Yo
Jason: Yo.

The Project Runway All-Stars post special series has been sent off the catwalk. And one of Chico's Favorites, Sweet Home Alabama, gets sent off to North Carolina for Geography lessons.

Chico: Good widdance to bad wubbish.
Jason: :)
Gordon: Speaking of Geography, where are we going this week?
Chico: Okay, so we were talking about MIP, so let's go to France.

Where MIPTV is being held this year in Cannes. Here's the laundry list of things up for bids this week. Big Board?


A La Pursuit du MIP

- Hide & Seek
- UNO the Game Show
- Talkabout
- The Legacy
- Electus

 

Jason: ---in French
Chico: We have Hide & Seek from Japan, where celebs are hiding in your house.
Jason: Brought in by Jack Black
Chico: UNO: The Game Show, created by our friends Tim Sheridan & Caleb Nelson.
Jason: That COULD work
Chico: a possible return for "Talkabout", the Canadian show from the late 80s, early 90s.
Gordon: That's the one I'm looking the most forward to.
Chico: That is overdue for a reboot. The Legacy from Europe, and Electus' full-slate of series, which includes Food Fighters, Bet on Your Baby, the Hero, Get Our Alive, King of the Nerds and Fashion Star.
Jason: Got it
Chico: Bet on Your Baby, by the way, launches in the US April 13.
Gordon: I like the one with media hoes hanging out in the house
Chico: Funny you should mention that. Any room in the Ho report for a Casting Couch?
Gordon: Sure deal. And it would be a BIG house, wouldnt it?
Chico: Oh brother yes.
Jason: Go on :)

Big Brother is looking for people who like to be watched. Their first stop: the Mohegan Sun. They will also be in NYC, Chicago, Minneapolis, Jacksonville, OKC, and Gainesville.

Chico: Looking for college kids, I bet. Hit up the website for more info.
Jason: bigbrothercasting.tv
Gordon: That's a lot of hoes. And I have a lot also.
Jason: Hit us up.
Chico: (Luda)

In this week's Media Ho Report, Millionaire has General Hospital week, Nick Cannon gets slimed, the Veterans accepted CBS's apology that I don't think they should have made...

Chico: It's called PR. Don't knock it.

Crystal Bowersox plays Patsy Cline, a suit against Reality Steve Carbone gets settled peacefully, Carrie Underwood performs on Idol on April 4th, so the contestants have a chance to learn how to be a star without any personality...

Chico: She's hot and married to an Ottawa Senator. She can afford to not have a personality.
Jason: Hey NOW :)

Ace Young and Diana DeGarmo get engaged, Demi Levato will return to X Factor and Gordon, Chico and company (including Jason) get 'Best Game SHow Fan Site' from About.com for the 3rd straight year. Go us.

Jason: Thank you a million times over :)
Chico: And again, to get the award is something. To get it three times in a row is something awesome. From the bottom of our hearts... we thank you... we love you... and be well. :-)
Gordon: And no, its not an April Fools Joke. But none of them are your hoes of the week.
Chico: Yeah, we're not that dumb to make ourselves hoes of the week. Who've you got?
Gordon: In the spirit of April Fool's, I have...The Stone Family.
Jason: Who?
Chico: I know who they are... Hey look, it's Crazy Zombie's Car Lot!
Gordon: Hey! That's Right!
Jason: AH THAT'S RIGHT!



Gordon: And we report this because after 4 episodes, The Faimly Trade has been yanked from the schedule.
Chico: As of April 22. They're going to be replaced with Minute to Win It reruns in prep for the shows that are currently being taped.
Jason: Set pics have leaked
Chico: It looks like the Minuto Para Ganar set, which is a GOOD thing.
Gordon: Its pretty.
Jason: Very
Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Jason: Shut down, gents?
Chico: Shut down, gents.
Jason: Shutting down! (Shuts down)
Chico: Still to come, we celebrate Zombie Jesus Pagan Freaknik OUR WAY. But first: In the grand and glorious tradition of the April Fool... We try and make some GOOD news out of some BAD news. Keep it on WLTI. You give us 22 minutes, we'll give you 22 tons of unused, unsold, unloved maple syrup. And we'll keep your car, too. Because we're like that.
Jason: :)

(BrainVision has been brough to you by Invasion of the GSN Zombies. Zombies invade the GSN offices looking for brains....but we only had enough action to make a 5 minute YouTube video, and not enough brains for a full motion picture. Sorry. )

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