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Previous Episodes (Season 32)
December 24/31 - 2012 Year In Review / Push or Flush (1)

January 7 - Gordon & Chico Meet the Beast / Resolutions / Push Or Flush (2)
 


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Episode 32.2 - Big Moments Other Than Chico's Let's Ask America Win
January 14

Chico: This is Chico Alexander...
Gordon: Hi Chico Alexander.
Chico: There are some things that we can't talk about because it may undermine the journalistic integrity of the site. That being said... after this week, I'm probably going to be going bowling a LOT more.
Gordon: Newsflash: There's lots of middle aged women who like to bowl. Middle aged women do NOT want to go in a go cart.
Chico: I didn't picture a whole lot of middle aged women bowlers!
Gordon: I am part of the Underground Bowling Association, which will be going to North Carolina in February. What in the world made you choose that answer?
Chico: Those times I went with you to Survivor at Parkway... didn't see'em.
Gordon: You needed a Phone-A-Gordon.
Chico: Yeah I wish I had a Phone-a-Gordon.
Gordon: For the record, I would have gotten the answer right.
Chico: Figures. But other than that...Chico do good, boss?
Gordon: Yes. Chico do good. I'm proud of Chico. How does it feel to be a game show champion?
Chico: Pretty darn good. But enough asking America, it's game time. From Somewhere in America... WLTI... is... ON!
Gordon: In addition to the newest entry into the game show contestant pantheon, I'm the 1%, Gordon Pepper. And we will start with someone who had a chance to make 500 times more than what Chico made.


(divided by 2)

Chico: Now this was a pretty big moment this week, not just in the moment itself, but how we got there, and what people should and shouldn't do.
Gordon: Do tell.
Chico: It was Cruise in & Win week, and the first contestant, Sheri Barberini, survived round 1 without using her Jumps. So she's got two going into the Classic round. Let's see how you would've played it out. Starting with $100,000...

An original version of what iconic film weapon is currently on display at the NRA's National Firearms Museum?
A: Indiana Jones' bullwhip
B: Robin Hood's bow and arrow
C: James Bond's bowler hat
D: Star Wars' lightsaber


Gordon: I had no idea here. It could be any of them, I would have jumped it.
Chico: I also would've jumped it. I mean, the bullwhip and the lightsaber were so iconic, but neither are firearms. So yeah, this was a jump. Sheri jumps it. Answer: D. Hard to believe, huh?
Gordon: It's hard to imagine a light saber as a projectile.
Chico: It really is, but that's the answer. For $250,000...

Though better known by her nickname in the "Peanuts" comics, what is Peppermint Patty's real name?
A: Patricia Reichardt
B: Patricia Patton
C: Patricia Schneiper
D: Patricia Herman

Gordon: This one I knew, so I would have answered it.
Chico: Answer?
Gordon: It's A.
Chico: It IS A. Sheri uses her second Jump. Should be noted that Sheri has a bank of $68,600. So she gets THIS, for $500,000...

What great mind kept a ledger of sins he committed as a child, including entries such as "punching my sister"?
A: Benjamin Franklin
B: Isaac Newton
C: Thomas Edison
D: Sigmund Freud


Gordon: Now keep in mind that I have a jump in the bank, so I'm using it here, because this is the last time I can use it,
Chico: And then you go right to the million dollar question.
Gordon: 'BUT if I was to make an educated guess, the only person in this 4 that studied philosophy was Isaac Newton. So that would have been my guess.
Chico: So how do you go from "punching my sister" to philosophy?
Gordon: If you're keeping a ledger of that, it would have been from someone who studied the mind and philosophy. Franklin and Edison weren't either of those, so you can rule them out. Freud was Psychoanalysis, so it would only make sense if his ledger was 'dreamt of doing the nasty with sis'.
Chico: Oh baby.
Gordon: So I would have jumped it, but the guess would have been Newton
Chico: The answer, by the way, WAS Newton. So he liked falling apples and hitting his sister. Sheri bailed out with no idea, so she wins $68,600.
Gordon: Good job by Sheri.
Chico: Indeed. Now we WERE going to talk about someone who took the Big Risk and wasn't so lucky *raises hand*... BUT then a pair of stories came out late Wednesday night. Some very high profile job vacancies in the future.



Chico: First up, and this came out of nowhere...After 11 years on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, Meredith Vieira is calling it a game show career. The two-time Emmy winner for Best Game Show Host is leaving the show to focus on other projects. Season 11 is already in the can, so she'll remain on the air over the summer while Disney/ABC looks for a new host.
Gordon: So all of a sudden, the last few weeks of the season of Millionaire, where they have special guest hosts, will all of a sudden be much more interesting.
Chico: We have backdoor auditions. There are a lot of things that Millionaire can do here. Big Board please.


Who Wants to Be a Millionaire... Host?

- 1) Make an Honest Host out of a Guest
- 2) Choose a Gamer (see Vieira, Meredith)
- 3) Go Off the Board
- 4) Regis
 

Chico: Who Wants to Be a Millionaire... Host? There are three choices that could be made. 1) Go back over the tapes and see who would be available to host (i.e. John Henson, Cat Deeley, Tom Bergeron) 2) Choose someone who's played the game (see Meredith Vieira 12 years ago). 3) ... Go completely off the board. It worked for the Feud...
Gordon: 4) ...Regis.
Chico: Oh yeah.
Gordon: According to many reports, Regis is interested in returning. And the way the format is set up, he'd be great at it.
Chico: It's a lot faster of a show than it used to be.
Gordon: Not really. There's no timer anymore, so they can slow the pace down for him. If you're the producers of Millionaire, do you do it?
Chico: Here's a tricky thing. I see where they do and I see where they don't. I mean, he got out of Live! because he was tired of the grind. But at the same time, he could take to Millionaire and not have THAT much of a grind anymore. But he'd be working day in and day out from August to November.
Gordon: The other thing to realize is that #1. It wasn't really the grind. It was about money. #2. He's not doing anything now. #3. He'd only be working 4-5 months of the year on HIS schedule.
Chico: This is going to be an interesting story to follow in the days and months ahead. But if hosting's not your thing, there's always coaching and judging music. Ain't that right, G?
Gordon: That is. On the heels of LA Reid not coming back to The X Factor, we also hear that Britney Spears it not coming back either. The difference though is that while LA Reid is leaving on his own accord, Britney is getting the boot.
Chico: Or she's quitting before they can give her the boot.
Gordon: You can't fire me! I quit! Now what's your thoughts on this?
Chico: If you ask me, for whatever reason she was gone from the show... it's probably for the best. After all, we were promised Britney being the next coming of Simon Cowell... instead we get... yeah.
Gordon: At the beginning of the season, I actually thought she was the best judge. Unfortunately, as the season progressed, she went from being a Simon Cowell wannabe to being a Paula Abdul wanna be. Britney was good for the first few weeks. Then she turned into a singer-loving shill.
Chico: She's not a closer. The show needs a closer. Unfortunately this is what happens when you try and cast a name. See Lopez, Jennifer Lynn.
Gordon: The show needs a lot of things. Now it looks like they may need a third judge, as Demi Lovato may also be leaving.
Chico: You can't be nice on this sort of show.
Gordon: You can, based on your role. That wasn't Britney's role.
Chico: So now the question... with auditions in the preliminary stages, what happens now?
Gordon: Well its not really preliminary yet. The real bulk starts in a few months. But they have to hurry up and start looking. Now you're Simon Cowell. Who is coming up on your radar?
Chico: Well, there's Britney's friend will dot I dot am. There's Diddy. Both have been around the way once or twice.
Gordon: I like that. I will also throw in a Country-type. And you need a music rep in there as well.
Chico: Here's a thought... Pete Waterman. Simon and Pete worked together on the original Pop Idol.
Gordon: Excellent, excellent choice.
Chico: If you want country and you're desperate to cast a name, how about Leann Rimes. Call it penance for that stunt she pulled in the final.
Gordon: No no no. Why would I want Leann Rimes? Get me Shania Twain.
Chico: Good idea there. So we have a country diva...
Gordon: And if you REALLY want to attract the eyeballs...Bieber.
Chico: OMGJUSTINBIEBER! I personally think he's too green in the industry for such a task, but that's just me.
Gordon: Can he be any worse than the train wreck that's going to be Nicki Minaj?
Chico: Another good story that we'll be following in the months to come. We'll also follow the journey of one Ashok Poonzhikunel.
Gordon: Another idea - something we haven't seen on Jeopardy in awhile. People betting smartly.
Chico: Do tell.
Gordon: Let's start with Ashok. He is a 4 time champ and is going for #5, but loses to Kristin Morgan on this Final Jeopardy Question: Capital Cities.

These 2 capitals are separated by only 250 miles of land & less than 1 degree of latitude, at 59 17' & 59 57' N.

Gordon: Chico, as the Lets Ask America champion, will give us the right answer.
Chico: What are Stockholm & Oslo.
Gordon: Yes. It would NOT be what is Dollywood and Dollyland, though I hear they both have nice peaks.
Chico: Hello!
Gordon: Everyone gets it wrong, but Kristin bets small enough to win. Now we set the stage: Kristin has $13,000. Parker has $16,400 and Natalie has $9,600.
Chico: Right.
Gordon: Lets give out the Category and question first. The category was Legal Terms.

This term for a type of decision is from Old French for "to speak the truth".

Chico: What is "verdict"?
Gordon: Verdad. Now what's the best way to bet if you're Natalie?
Chico: All you can eat, baby. The scores are what the book calls "evenly spaced".
Gordon: Absolutely wrong.
Chico: Okay, what's the right answer, then?
Gordon: Parker has to bet to cover Kristin and Natalie is in 3rd. The right answer is...$0. Kristin must bet $3,401. She gets it wrong, she's at $9,599. Parker has to bet to cover Kristin, so if he's wrong, he's out.
Chico: Right.
Gordon: What's Parker's bet?
Chico: He bets $9601.
Gordon: That's what you have to bet.
Chico: He was going for the win. Kristin was playing to tie.
Gordon: I don't know what Kristin was thinking. She could have won. So could Natalie.
Chico: Yep. Instead, we end with a tie that is resolved on Friday's show.
Gordon: It's resolved in an ugly way, as Kristin wins with $3,999. She has a 3 day total of $17,498, a far cry from Ashok's $65,602 three day total from earlier on this week.
Chico: She returns to play game 4 Monday. While we're on the subject of returns, you remember a show called "The Joe Schmo Show"? Perhaps the greatest reality show prank ever concocted?
Gordon: I hated it. I found no redeemable value from the show. I didn't find it funny. We didn't rate it, but if we did, I would have flunked it.
Chico: Well.. now you get your chance, because it's back on Spike. This time, the mark is Chase Rogan, who thinks he's on a TV show looking for America's next great bounty hunter.
Gordon: Let's cut to the chase here. Did you like ANY part of this?
Chico: It got kinda boring after the first show. I mean, a joke's not fun if you know the punchline. They say that the journey is what counts, and this is going to be a long one.
Gordon: The acting is horrendous. The 'game' is weak, because it's so easy to manipulate anything nowadays, and nothing here fascinates me. And they forced me to watch Lorenzo Lamas for an hour.
Chico: Two hours.
Gordon: One. I didn't bother watching episode 2.
Chico: Touche.

THE JOE SCHMO SHOW
Spike - 10p ET Tuesday
GORDON CHICO AVERAGE-O-MATIC
F F YOU SUCK!

Gordon: That alone gets an F from me.
Chico: F here. Let's get the Push or Flush for this one out of the way...
Gordon: Flush!
Chico: FLUSH! One... two... three...
Gordon: PLUNGE! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Chico: That was fun.
Gordon: Now would 'Stars in Danger: The Dive' be any more fun?
Chico: No. This was just painful.
Gordon: How did this get on the air?
Chico: ABC picked up a show. Fox, being... well, Fox... decided to pick up a SIMILAR show. Because apparently ABC is Fox's whipping boy.
Gordon: Note to ABC. Please reconsider.
Chico: Thank you. Anyway, it's a standard diving competition in singles and doubles.
Gordon: Terrell Owens. J-Wow, Alexandra Paul, Kyle and Kim Richards, Bethany Hamilton, David Chokachi, Stephen 'twitch' Boss and Antonio Sabato Jr. are your 'Stars'.

STARS IN DANGER: THE HIGH DIVE
Fox - 8p ET Wednesday
GORDON CHICO AVERAGE-O-MATIC
F F YOU SUCK!

Chico: Antonio Sabato Jr. wins. Oh yeah, and Bethany Hamilton is hot. That's all you need to know. F.
Gordon: I just thought the bottle dive was awesome. I didn't realizing jumping into the pool counts as a dive. This is all you need to know. F U.
Chico: Sorry, Kyle. You'll always be Jessy Preston from "Down to Earth" to me.
Gordon: I personally think watching the hamsters jump into their baths is more exciting.
Chico: Indeed. Though Darnell and Mike wish they didn't use their fishbowl.
Gordon: Roll That Beautiful Brain Footage.

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Thanks, Doug. Okay, Gordon, I've got bad news. With the NHL strike resolve... we have no more hockey equipment.
Gordon: I know. We had to give it all back. Drat.
Chico: But we still have this... *aluminum bat*
Gordon: There's always baseball.
Chico: Pitchers report in 30 days. :-)

The Job has announced the companies participating in the series. They are the Palm Restaurant Group.... Cosmopolitan... Epic Records... Zynga... LiveNation...
Gilt... and Viceroy Hotel Group.

Gordon: All places that really need the publicity. And maybe they should have a datebook.
Chico: Maybe they should.

Face-Off shows up on January 15th, American Idol on January 16th and King of the Nerds on January 17th.

Chico: Yay, boo, yay. Yes, I just booed Idol Just goes to show you how far the golden goose has fallen.
Gordon: And if the reports of Nicki Minaj are true., this may get a lot of press from us for all the wrong reasons.
Chico: There's a saying about the golden goose...You don't kill it. I think Nicki Minaj is going to kill it. And did we mention that Nigel Lythgoe is going through the whole corporate meddling phase AGAIN?
Gordon: I actually like this part though. More time is going to be spent on the Hollywood and Semi-Final rounds. Quite frankly, I want to know about the singers.
Chico: Makes sense.
Gordon: That being said, I have a feeling that whatever good is going to be done here will be undone by Minaj.
Chico: If it doesn't work, I think we know who to blame. Just put Jimmy on the panel already.
Gordon: Jimmy isn't the answer. Maybe getting loaded is the answer.
Chico: Maybe. This week, we're supersizing and supershrinking.

NBC's getting ready for its impending rebranding of G4 AND for its own summer schedule by rerunning American Ninja Warrior on Saturdays beginning February.

Gordon: If you're not doing anything with Saturday nights anyways, you may as well use it for branding.
Chico: Right on. It leads up to the season premiere this summer.
Gordon: That's what makes it smart. Now I have something dumb.
Chico: Great.

Are YOU Smarter than...Katt Williams, who gets arrested for Child Endangerment and Illegal Drugs that he probably spent good money on, while owing someone else $7,500 for a car that he didn't spend the money on.

Chico: You really can't make this stuff up.
Gordon: No you can't. Now for the Haterade.

Not a good week for Britney Spears. her relationship with Jason Trawick was Toxic. So she's going to hit the single road one more time.



Chico: Hey Gordon! Now's your chance!
Gordon: I think you confused me for someone else.
Chico: Well, Britney's gonna need to go somewhere to get her mind off of this week. How about Australia?
Gordon: Put another shrimp on her barbie?
Chico: Hell yeah.

7 Network is about to ask that age-old question again... "Who is The Mole?"

Gordon: Cooper is.

*Cooper pops up*

Gordon: Good boy, Cooper.

Shura Taft will host a new series with production set to start January 16. Meanwhile in the UK, we have an interesting show you'll like. It's called "Five Minutes to a Fortune". teams of two - one Timekeeper and one Gameplayer - play for up to 100,000.

Chico: The Timekeeper decides the game categories and how long they'll play each game. In the end, the roles reverse and the Timekeeper plays the final round to win the quiche. Host Davina McCall says it's "one of those shows that has you clenching your buttocks from start to finish."
Gordon: Its an interesting concept. I want to see how that translates to TV.
Chico: It starts on C4 later this year. And yes, folks... Davina is my game show hussy. Rebuttal from Gordon?
Gordon: No rebuttal. You can have Davina. I'll take Victoria Coren
Chico: Huzzah. Onto the hoes! (plays Luda)

In this week's Media Ho report, Wayne Brady does BET 2013, Howie Mandel plays at the Hard Rock, Meredith salutes James Bond...Betty White gets the flu. Keith Urban is ALSO joining the judges Fight-Fest on American Idol, Kim Kardashian's pregnancy WILL be shows on her reality show...Zac Posen will replace Michael Kors on Project Runway, Jillian Michaels wants to do family weight loss sessions, and Sean Lowe eliminated 7 bachelorettes on his first show. Isn't that exciting?

Chico: *zzzzzzZ*...curl up into a ball and cry...
Gordon: But none of them are the hoes of the week.
Chico: Who've you got?
Gordon: I have Andrea Boehlke, John Cochran, Malcolm Freberg, Brandon Hantz, Francesa Hogi, Corinne Kaplan, Brenda Lowe, Dawn Meehan, Erik Reichenbach, and Phillip Sheppard.
Chico: Ah, the "Favorites" from Survivor Caramoan.
Gordon: Yes. Only one of them would be one I would consider a 'threat', and that would be Malcolm. As for the others - I really hope they learned their lesson. Something interesting though - Francesca is the first time that someone who got booted out first gets to play again.
Chico: Interesting.
Gordon: We shall see. And those...are your hoes.
Chico: And that's Brainvision. Shut it down, G.
Gordon: Shutting Down. When we come back, it's time for the revenge of the Super Toilet, as well as 6 things we think you should know. You're reading WLTi. You give us 22 minutes and we'll give you 22 music judges that I think could be fun hosting Millionaire.
Gordon: Like Randy Jackson, Dawg. Simon Cowell, Even Paula Abdul can be fun.
Chico: I don't know about that, G. I think Paula has no hosting chops in her body.
Gordon: What about ...CARNIE WILSON!
Chico: ... I retract my argument.

(BrainVision has been brought to you by. New York Jets Ink Master. Join Rex Ryan as he searches for the best tattoo to complement his..um...masterpiece of his wife wearing his star QB's jersey. Creepy.)

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