Haterade hated Michael Lynche's performance last week - and apparently, so did
the rest of America, who forced the judges to burn their save for him. Can
Michael rebound enough to send 2 of his peers packing, or did he just delay
the inevitable?
Let's do last week over. Seriously, let's just throw last week out. That's
what we're doing after Michael Lynche gets saved, prompting this week to be
double trouble. 2 singers are going to get the steel-tipped boot out of the
competition. Chico Alexander and Jason Block join me this week to determine
who those people are.
However, before we start, let's discuss a trend that can't possibly be good to
Idol fans. And no, I'm not talking about the ratings, which have dropped to
the point that they are no longer the #1 show on TV. I'm talking about
something more damning to Idol - the votes. Ryan Seacrest said that after the
season total of over 140 million votes, which is a lot...but when you factor
that the first show had 28 million votes, and you had 7 voting shows total,
that means the other 6 shows averaged around 18 million votes. That's not only
a decline, that's a measurable one - the first time in American Idol history
that there's been a decline, let alone a 40% plunge.
America has said that they don't like what they are hearing, and when you have
less voters, you have a greater chance for upsets. With the judges save gone,
this could be a real roller coaster ride the rest of the way. So let's enjoy
the ride.
This week, it's one of music's biggest icons. No, not Adam Lambert (who's this
week's mentor), but Elvis Presley. Adam Lambert a mentor? Really? Between him
and Miley Cyrus as mentors, you wonder why these kids aren't improving? No
reason to look much further than that. Adam's looking to be completely honest
(well, he'd be the first this season to do that) and instill the spirit of
Elvis in everyone. I'd like to point out that 1. Adam Lambert never did an
Elvis song on Idol 2. 'What Do You Want From Me' is not an Elvis song, 3. I
don't need to see neither Adam's tongue or Ryan Seacrests' infatuation with
said tongue.
I do need to see some
Crystal
Bowersox's with
the song 'Saved'. Give me what I want. Now.
The Good - It's a very nice
performance. Her vocals are on point, the guitar was used properly, and she
put her own spin on an Elvis song that people will remember. Nice job.
The Bad - I wonder if she
could have done herself better if she took a more well-known song and
Crystalled it up. Not an obvious song, but one that the audience can relate
to, which could get her even more votes. And improper use of the shiny guitar
could cause blindness to vision impaired people.
The Jason - Elvis's favorite
type of music was GOSPEL, and this was a perfect choice for her. It had
elements of gospel, rockabilly and blues. Right in her wheelhouse and a great
performance out of the box.
The Chico - First of all...
Adam Lambert... WHY? Second of all, She was told to "surprise people" and
"keep it fresh". Well, she surprised me. The song, which I haven't heard of,
fits in her wheelhouse, but I wish I knew what she was singing, because she
was screaming the whole thing. She did have energy and she may have knocked it
out of the park in the judges' eyes... but I'm not wowed. Still, she'll
survive.
The Verdict - Well that
concludes the entertainment portion of this episode of American Idol 9: The
Crystal Bowersox Invitational. Now stay tuned for Glee, or even better, do
some channel surfing for the next 75 or so minutes and then come back to the
show when Idol is over. I know I will.
...oh wait, I can't do that? Something about legal and duty negligence? Fine,
I'll cover the rest of the show, but I'm not going to be happy about it.
We start the rest of the show with
Andrew
Garcia, who
was proclaimed 'Boring' by Adam Lambert. Lambert wants Garcia to switch it up,
and Garcia decides to do so with 'Hound Dog' will the performance leave us
wagging our tails or howling at the moon? .
The Good - Well, he did
change it up. I will say that it was different, as Andrew jazzes it up. And he
looks nice in the formal wear.
The Bad - If Andrew swung
the microphone pole around while walking in the audience, he could have
accidentally knocked someone in the head. If he swung it around and knocked
himself in the head, then we'd be spared from an uncomfortable 90 second flat
pitched disaster. He cements his 'boring' status thanks to not only Lambert,
but with his interview with Ryan, when he gave us 60 seconds of absolutely
nothing. Ryan was tossing him softballs and it was swing and a miss. And I'll
give Seacrest points for trying, but not even he can draw blood from a stone.
The Jason - I loved the
swing, Brian Setzer like arrangement to this. This was very very good. Two
weeks in a row, his risks paid off. But was it enough for him to stay? Not
sure.
The Chico - Changing it up
wasn't the problem for Andrew. The problem for Andrew... was Andrew. He has
this nasally tone which he just can't seem to escape. Couple it with a risk
that didn't seem to pay off (it lacked swagger and totally lost the story of
the original), and Andrew is in deep dog doo.
The Verdict - Usually, when
you're in the bottom 3, you usually get a swing from the audience to get
yourself out of the bottom three, but the effort was so bad that I don't know
if that's going to help. He needs at least 2 disasters from the remaining
singers to stick around in the competition, but with some of the people
waiting to perform, he may get it.
Tim Urban is
one of those people. Adam wants Tim to get out of his comfort zone and get
into a falsetto. Sure, it sounds pretty - if Tim can keep it in pitch while
singing 'I Can't Help Falling In Love'. Will he?
The Good - You know what
really makes this a nice song? Not Tim, but the arrangement itself. The
arrangement in the background is amazing and really accentuates Tim's vocals.
And the melody line is beautiful.
The Bad - And now I get to
talk about Tim's vocals, which completely breaks down at the end of the song.
I actually liked that he didn't use Adam's suggestion of not hitting it into
the falsetto, because that would have been ghastly. But not holding out that
last note was equally as ghastly and turned the song from a potential 'moment'
to 'What in the world was that last nite? Did he hiccup at the end?'
The Jason - And the boredom
continues. His voice was whisper light, and I didn't feel the love in the song
here.
The Chico - This is one of
those songs that can really showcase a mellow moment that Tim actually has the
capacity to produce. That said, it looked like Justin Bieber doing a Dylan
impersonation to start. And it was flat. This could've been a real game
changer, too. Props for trying to make the song his own, though.
The Verdict - Tim did the
one thins that almost no one else could do this season - capitalize on success
they had the week before. That was the best Tim performance, and his selection
will get his fan base to get to the phone. That may have sealed the fate of
Mr. Garcia.
Adam wants
Lee DeWyze to
be happy, playful and sexy with his interpretation of 'A Little Less
Conversation'.
The Good - Lee absolutely
brings the spunk and energy with him tonight. It's possibly the most complete
version of that song that I've heard of that song and almost drowns out Jon
Peter Lewis' version out of my head.
The Bad - He brought the
spunk with him, but he left the lyric book at home. Half of those lyrics were
made up and I was wondering it this was the 'Rock Alzheimer's Remix' of the
song.
The Jason - This I Liked.
This is a popular song(from the Junkie XL remix a few years back), but his
bluesy vocal had the energy we missed over the last few songs.
The Chico - Lee had to get
back to what he does best, especially after last week. Other a couple of
obvious lyric flubs, Lee goes back into his element and it works for him.
The Verdict - MUCH better
than last week. This, for me, would have been the best performance if he
remembered the lyrics. If we get a few more of these, we could finally have
someone that could somewhat be in Crystal's league.
Aaron Kelly says
that he's going to have a great time with 'Blue Suede Shoes'. Whenever you
hear 'have a great time', it's usually at the expense of the pacing, the
pitch, the lyrics or a combination of all of the above. Will Aaron prove me
right?
The Good - I actually liked
the end of the song. He slowed it down, displayed his range during the half
time and really gave us a nice performance.
The Bad - The problem is
that he needed to do that for the whole song. If he did the whole song in half
time, it would have been a great performance. The problem is that the first
half was so dreary that I don't know if people stayed around to hear the
second part
The Jason - He said it was
the wrong choice for him. Believe the kid. It was too big of a song, and he
wouldn't know about the mature subjects in it. Wrong choice, wrong, wrong,
wrong.
The Chico - This was a tale
of two halves. Aaron needed to give it 110 percent. He ended up giving it 83
percent, and it was all in the ending.
The Verdict - Simon's 100%
right - even in half time, the arrangement made him completely uncontemporary
and old. And that's going to be a major problem when your fan base is the
young kids. Unlike Tim, who completely nailed his fan base, Aaron missed his,
and it could be costly tonight.
Last week,
Sioban Magnus has
the pipes for 'Suspicious Minds', but will she bring the energy? We know she
will, but she needs to be restrained. Can she combine the best of both worlds?
The Good - The second half
of that song sizzled. Once again, the half time break down worked again, which
again makes me wonder...
The Bad - ...why we had to
wait 60% of the song to hear it. I don't know why the producers are giving the
idols the formulaic do nothing for the first half of the song and then give us
the second version of the song. And her dress and looked like what I would be
expecting if I went to the prom with the Bride of Frankenstein.
The Jason - Loved the
arrangement, and her vocals were top notch. This was a lot of fun.
The Chico -Technically,
Siobhan nailed it. She had the right tone, and the right pitch, but for the
most part, it was missing a little je ne sais quoi until the tail end of it.
Then it really started to pop, so good job for her.
The Verdict - I do like
Siobhan's versatility, but she has to showcase it throught the WHOLE song. The
energy that she had for other songs at the beginning just wasn't there this
week. Michael Lynche learned that if you don't bring it every week, you could
have issues, and I think this week, she could have some problems if her fans
are asleep at the wheel.
Speaking of,
Michael Lynche needs
to do something to bring his voters back. Maybe 'In The Ghetto' will be that
song. For his sake, it better be.
The Good - At least Michael
strips down the goofiness of last week and gets down to basics. It's a nice
idea to get that acoustic guitar in there, and the accompaniment really
complements his vocals.
The Bad - If I'm singing for
my life and I'm an R&B singer, I do not sing a slow country version of the
song and bring my guitar to it. And I certainly don't sing flat. And massive
boos for Seacrest for #1. Going after Brian Dunkleman in a cheap shot and #2.
Screwing up Michael Lynche's names with Adam Lambert, calling him 'Lambert
Lynche' in terms of singing for redemption. If it's not obvious that Ryan
isn't completely into the show tonight, it should be now.
The Jason - Again, he has
his Seal voice on. And this is a great interpretation of it. He told a story
here. He was redeemed, and should be here next week.
The Chico - Only one thing
on Michael's mind... redemption. He has to become the song and connect to the
hearts of the voters... So he decides to strip it down and keep it simple.
Probably the best thing he could do, even if it IS a little boring and safe,
because barring another out-there performance, there's no way that his fan
club is going to let him down for a second consecutive week.
The Verdict - Yuck. I hated
this also. A million times better than last week, sure, but I hated it. That
being said, he's going to be absolutely safe as his million of fans will be
dialing until their fingers fall off.
Katie Stevens has
a question for the jdges, 'Baby What Do You Want Me To Do?' Well I want her to
get more energy and emotion, but will she respond to my request?
The Good - You know she's
going to have no problems with the pitch, which is fine, and the money note,
which is fine. Automatons don't make pitch mistakes.
The Bad - Once again, the
arrangement makes her sound like she's in her 60's on a revival tour. But
that's not the biggest issue for our robotic friend. This is why she is a
robot. This is a song that Adam Lambert correctly phrases as 'frustrating',
and instead of that, she's smiling. She loses all believability and creates a
disjunction between us and her. Maybe she's not old enough yet to convey those
emotions, or maybe Skylab just hasn't built a model that gives us a pouty
face...yet...
The Jason - Sultry, sassy
and a serious dose of attitude. Liked this a lot. She brought it.
The Chico - I'm hoping Adam
infused a little emotion into our little automaton. It... worked? She worked
the crowd, she played with the vocals. I know it was hard for her, but it was
something she needed to do.
The Verdict - I actually
agree with Simon. It was loud, annoying and there's still no emotional
connect. I want her to sit down, sing a slow ballad and give us some sort of
emotion. That is, if she survives this week.
Casey James wraps
up the show tonight with 'Lawdy Miss Clawdy', who sure looks good to Casey.
Will Casey look good to everyone else?
The Good -
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. (Translation of Gordon's snoring: The vocal
was ok. The technicality was ok. Everything was ok.)
The Bad -
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. (Translation of Gordon's snoring: Wrong
sonng to sing. Completely boring and forgettable. As much emotional energy as
a rocking chair.)
The Jason - The judges were
right on this one. This was a safe, by the numbers Casey performance. I don't
think he will be out, but this one COULD put him in potential trouble tonight.
The Chico - Very soulful.
Very smooth. Very solid, but not much to write home about.
The Verdict -
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. (Translation of Gordon's snoring: He could
have done so much here, and did absolutely nothing. If he wasn't in the last
spot for the evening, I think he could be in serious danger, but the pimp slot
will bail him out.)
Overall Verdict: Take one
Crystal Bowersox and stir. Take Lee and Michael, who are both safe. Stir, mix,
and serve. That's your main course, and for your desserts, have some Siobhan
and Casey. The other 4 are like the leftovers that we can store in the back of
the refrigerator. We'll probably be forgetting about 2 of these and leave them
to rot.
Trouble: Andrew Garcia,
Aaron Kelly, Katie Stevens, Tim Urban
Tim had...a good performance? Wha? Yes, he's still in the bottom for me
because America will be voting to save Michael, and that could be problematic
for him. That being said, I do think Tim's effort spells curtains for Mr.
Garcia. As for the other person, I think there's a glut in pop, and it's a
coin flip between Aaron (who was streaky) and Katie (who went back to a
disconnect). I think what bails out Aaron is that his fan base knew he was in
the bottom and voted for him, whereas Katie's going to have the same problems
that Michael Lynche had - and there's no Judge's Save this time.
OUT: ANDREW GARCIA, KATIE STEVENS
The Jason: Adam Lambert was
a decent mentor, but these 4 have problems tonight.
TROUBLE: Andrew Garcia, Tim Urban, Aaron Kelly, Casey James.
The two going home are the people who really didn't bring it.
OUT: Andrew Garcia, Aaron Kelly
The Chico: I may have to go
chalk on this one after last week's shocker, because a) Crystal's army is a
strong one, and b) after last week, all Big Mike has to do is show up and his
fanbase will save him.
TROUBLE: Andrew Garcia, Aaron Kelly, Katie Stevens, Tim Urban.
Tim had a good week... twice in a row now, so he'll go back to safety. If you
put Katie and Aaron's performances together, you have ONE good performance.
I'm tempted to give Katie the edge just because she managed to deliver a
performance that at least LOOKED lively for once. Andrew just blew it.
OUT: Andrew Garcia & Aaron Kelly.
Join us in 24 hours to see who goes to the Jailhouse of obscurity and won't be
rocking out any more.