Travis: I want to be a Japanese Superhero.
Chico: Me too.
Don: Sounds like a sweet deal.
Gordon: I'll settle for a British Timelord
Chico: BTW winner of Who Wants to Be a Superhero's winning comic... next month. Welcome back... it's NEWS TIME!
Travis: *runs for the Choppler*...Anyone got a Swiffer?
Chico: Sorry. Best I have is this O Cedar Mop
Gordon: Stack the Swiffer?
Travis: O Cedar makes my life easier.
Chico: Alright. Choppler is hot. Gordon... make news go now!
Gordon: Roll that beautiful brain footage
Travis: *cough...hack...choke...sneeze* Covered in dust...and what happened to my hamsters?
Chico: I don't think you want to know.
Gordon: Hey Travis - you met Eve the cat?

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper... and Chico Alexander)

Travis: ............................................ HAMTARO!!!
Chico: He had some of the cappuccino cake...
Gordon: Now THAT would make the Doppler go faster
Chico: It's the only explanation. Okay, first news item..
Travis: *sneeze*...allergic...*sneeze*...to...*AH CHOOO*...cats.
Don: Dang.
Chico: Oh crap.
Gordon: Don't forget to get your cat sprayed and shaved...oh wait, wrong...first item?
Chico: First item.

1 vs. 100 is looking for "Super smart kids" to appear in an upcoming episode.

Travis: Can I pass for 12?
Chico: ... You can pass for 16.
Gordon: You don't think this would happen to be in response to FOX and ABC's kid shows, do you?
Chico: I'm not saying it's outside the realm of possibility
Don: I hadn't actually thought of it that way...
Chico: Because, you know, there's that... but at the same time. the Mob is the most diverse lot of game show contestants ever assembled onto one stage. Super smart kids... well, maybe it's an idea whose time has come. And hey, we know a few.
Travis: Certainly the most contestants in the terms of quantity.
Chico: That's just in the title. Heh. Next up?
Travis: *boop*

Wanna create a show for Endemol and win $50,000? Go to ziddio.com (comcast's user-generated site) and submit an idea. If you win, you get a $50,000 and 10 days to shoot a pilot.

Chico: Dude... I'm so there.
Travis: Ooooh
Don: Neat idea.
Gordon: Of course, you probably sign all rights and your first born son off of the contracts, but hey, why not?
Travis: Thank God I'm only having daughters.
Chico: ME too. They can have my brother. But he eats like a horse.
Gordon: Next article?
Chico: Next article...
Travis: *boop*

If you want to keep Noel Edmonds on Deal or No Deal, how much will it cost you? If you're Endemol, a lot, as he signs for £2.5M a year.

Chico: That's about, oh, $4 or 5 M a year.
Don: Whoa.
Travis: wowzers
Gordon: That would be...Deal!
Chico: Oh but yes. Makes you wonder who'll be richer in 2007, Noel or Simon Cowell.  Speaking of which, time for some Haterade..
Gordon: Anyone have any guess as to what this week's is? (aka yes, it should be THAT obvious)
Travis: No, but I'm waiting with baited breath.
Chico: ... I have NO IDEA.
Don: I just don't feel like guessing. :P

The Donald saves Miss USA and gives her another chance, Rosie O'Donnell calls The Donald immoral, The Donald calls Rosie fat, Rosie threatens lawsuit, The Donald threatens lawsuit...blah blah blah....btw, did I mention that......the New Apprentice shows up in a few weeks?

Chico: Oh yeah. Forgot about that.
Don: Of course!
Chico: A Haterade addendum for Miss Nevada USA should be added.
Gordon: Should and will. Next article?
Travis: *boop*
Chico: Next... Let's Go Global. Time to head to Spain.
Travis: Are we and a guest flying round trip coach?
Chico: From Los Angeles..

What's VIP Noche? It's Spain's newest take on Hollywood Squares. La Sexta is getting ready to roll that out in 2007.

Gordon: Nice. Any word on Vas O No Vas?
Chico: Nothing yet
Gordon: Or is it more like the Media Ho-llywood Squares
Chico: plays *Area Codes*
Gordon: Did you know Chico, that you could rent an American-Idoler to sing at your wedding?
Chico: Yep. It only costs me about $25,000, though. Hell, I can sing at my own wedding for free. And at yours for cheap.

In this week's Media Ho Report, Bill Rancic gets engaged, Leona Lewis wins X-Factor, Jillian Barberie will be expecting a baby ho in the future... If you're looking to be a Ho, Design Star 2 is looking for Designer hoes, Danny Bonaduce gets a radio gig, Sandra Colton sings the National Anthem,. Kelly Clarkson gets accused of vandalism, while Reg Grundy gets a nice big yacht.

Chico: He of the classic Australian and US game show producing company that bears his name.
Travis: Go Reg
Gordon: but none of them are your hoes of the week
Chico: It's Trump again, isn't it?
Gordon: Nope
Chico: Who would it be then?
Gordon: This week's ho is Tyra Banks, as the syndicates have so much faith in the show that they renew it...for TWO seasons.
Chico: I'm guessing she feels quite well... for herself. But if I can break in...  This is a year-end special. I'm guessing you have one more gift for us in our Brainvision stocking.
Gordon: just an announcement to check our Extra session for the 12 Hoes of the year
Chico: It's coming soon. Meanwhile, Brainvision... done.
Travis: *Choppler landing*
Chico: Jackets going back into the closet until Jan. 12.
Chico: Hamsters going back into their cage... and Eve going back into her hermetically sealed bubble.
Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Chico: When we come back... HAPPY TOILET TIME! This is the big show.

(Brainvision is brought to you by TextBook2Win. The only way to make sure that you're not spending your whole day calling in on a vapid game show is to get a job. You get a good one by staying in school. Stay in school, kids!)

CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE