August 28, 2006

Chico: Welcome back... Ahem... LET'S DO THE NEWS!
Jason: Double capacity mice power flux capacitor on
Chico: Fluxing?
Jason: Check.
Gordon: Roll that Beautiful Brain Footage
Jason: The Mega-sized Brain Footage.
Chico: Choppler armed...
Jason: (clicks on the choppler)

Doug:  (impersonating Mark Thompson) From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, featuring the Award-Winning Brainvision News team.

Chico: The dulcet tones of Mr. Doug Morris, ladies and gentlemen.
Jason: Jackets on...let's do this. (applause for Doug)
Chico: First down the pipeline..

Who Wants to Be a Superhero is a big hit on Sci-Fi, as the show keeps growing, delivering the largest audience since "Mad Mad House" some three years ago.

Jason: I don't understand it...but I accept it.
Chico: I understand and accept it. Take a look at Sci-Fi's core audience. Then take a look at the rating: 1.815 million total for last week. That's a hit in the cable world. That's a decent sized hit for a decent-sized network.
Gordon: If you've seen the show, it's hysterical, compelling cheese. Even more importantly, it's a classic show of the goodness of people, and when you break it down, we are all looking for a hero.
Jason: I thought you said you didn't like it?
Gordon: It's still cheese, but it's the same sort of compelling cheese that made Meet My Folks a cult hit. And the mastermind behind that, Bruce Nash, is the same mastermind behind this. And with Stan Lee and Sci-Fi helming the franchise, with the ratings it got, I think a second season of this will be almost a given.
Jason: Sometimes even we were wrong. We flushed this big time.
Chico: And great preface to the question: do we see a second round of Superheroes?
Jason: Yes we do.
Chico: We'll be the first to admit.. we were wrong in flushing. It's good mommy.
Gordon: Oopsie. But we are man enough to admit our screw ups. This is addicting cheese and we will see a second season.
Chico: Let's hope. It's deserved. Next up, Gordon-Man?
Gordon: From a hit...to a major miss...

This week's Haterade goes to...GSN! With the ratings as low as they are to begin with, the ratings dropped even further from last year - down a whopping 35%.

Jason: What was the cause?
Gordon: Dr. Pepper says that the diagnosis comes from bad choiceofprogramitis.
Jason: Running Amazing Race into the ground?
Chico: AR, good but no Millionaire. Now it's on every night at the butt-late time of... 3am.
Gordon: Running AR and gambling show into the ground, coming up with a watered down and not as fun version of Extreme Dodgeball and despite the success of Lingo, not capitalizing with classic games and instead giving us a lewd version of I've Got a Secret and a weak straight-quizzer in the form of Starface. GSN severely needs to listen to their clientele and give us good solid game shows. Chain Reaction is a nice start, but the direction looks more like they will be going the interactive, 'if we can't get the ratings, lets at least make a profit this way' approach.
Chico: Sloppy, but it gets the job done.
Jason: Which is full circle in a sense.
Chico: Question, will we see the more traditional programming model return, and if so, for how long? Chain Reaction... great start. Playmania... it's grown in quality. Then again, some can say that it isn't hard to do.
Gordon: I don't want interactive programming with really bad games. I WANT GOOD GAMES. I have a  letter word. _ _ _ _ S. Can you tell me what it is?
Jason: GAMES. Oh yeah...duh.
Gordon: No. (BUZZ). The correct answer is SUCKS, which is where I'm hoping GSN doesn't go should they keep the Playmania experience. Next article?
Chico: Just remember, "That's the Question"... right around the corner. Be positive, man.
Gordon: Me? Positive?
Chico: Old dog can learn new tricks, can he?
Gordon: Sure. I just hope GSN doesn't treat the 65% of it's remaining audience like a fire hydrant.
Chico: Now you're reaching. Next up... Let's Go Global, shall we?

Game shows in China and Hong Kong? Good. Game shows in Australia... Bad.  The Orient picks up versions of  vs.  and Deal or No Deal. Meanwhile, Channel 7 in Australia dropped TWO games in the course of a month.

Chico: Apparently ratings opposite Family Feud and Deal or No Deal were anemic. Two big shows down under.
Jason: Wow.
Gordon: You could say that the shows WENT under.
Jason: you just did.
Gordon: I did, didn't I?
Chico: BB loss cue
Chico: On the bright side. China's warming up to the genre, and what better warm-up than the two big games around the world right now?
Gordon: You mean Text2win and Starface?
Jason: oh my
Chico: Jason... Club his kneecaps =p
Jason: (pulls out baseball bat and plays with it menacingly) Play nice.
Gordon: Yes, daddy.
Chico: Next article?
Gordon: Yes, daddy.

Here's something you don't see everyday - a FOX reject gets...salvaged by ABC? Yet that's what we're seeing as 'Show Me What You Got' migrates over.

Chico: That makes Set for Life... Show Me What You Got... and Pokerface.... Three game shows in primetime... all next year, hopefully.
Jason: a/k/a the Con Test. But no Super Millionaire? What is up with dat?
Chico: That ship has sailed. ABC changeover does that. Programming heads want to create their own dynasty, not ride on the coattails of others. Something about the testicular aspect of the whole deal.
Jason: Feh.
Gordon: How many shows have there been that have been thrown out with the bath water just because the new regime, so earnest to make a mark, throws out success?
Jason: Tons.
Gordon: The One did great numbers, didn't it?
Jason: Uh no.
Chico: Oh yeah.  Great numbers. Notice George Strombocytosis isn't hurting for work.
Gordon: Anyone for Pants Off Dance off at 11:35 on ABC after the news?
Chico: If it's the ep where host Jodie Sweetin actively participates, I'm in.
Jason: Jodie Sweetin -  how far you have fallen.
Gordon: Before we depart for the Land of Wrong, next article?
Chico: It's not just the Land of Wrong. We're going to special hell.
Gordon: (packs up suitcases). When are we going, daddy?
Chico: Well, we're halfway done with Brainvision, so let's go into the second half... Shopping for home games? We've got a full deck for you. Hey Gordon,
you have a PS2, right?
Gordon: I do
Chico: You have a USB microphone?
Gordon: I do
Chico: You have an overwhelming feeling of needing to be at the forefront of attention in a musical competition in front of an audience of millions?
Gordon: Oooh. I do. When can I audition?
Chico: November 15...

That's the drop date of "Karaoke Revolution Presents American Idol" featuring the voices of Randy and Simon. If you don't sing, that's cool too, because we've got games for you as well... We have just released... Family Feud DVD v.2, Deal or No Deal DVD, and the $100,000 Pyramid DVD. If you're watching from the UK, we also have "Test the Nation" on the way.

Chico: We just set up your game night. Now go play. They're all in the $20-$30 range. Reasonably priced.
Jason: Get em now...or wait for your holiday wish list. It's on mine.
Gordon: Are you getting me any of those for the holidays?
Jason: We'll see.
Chico: Get 'em for the natural born gamer in your life.  Next?
Gordon: Next up...

We love to make fun of Playmania. Unfortunately, not only is it not going away any time soon, but GSN is moving it an hour EARLIER to get even more people to shell out their hard earned cas...I mean to play along.

Jason: You were right the first time
Chico: Not to mention adding on another day. Because it's so darn profitable.
Gordon: And just think, we get Midnight Money Madness starting on Monday
Chico: Happiness!
Jason: Cant wait
Gordon: We'll either praise it, or beat it up. Count on probably the latter.
Chico: Speaking of which.. Lock and load, gents, it's time to get Fully Loaded.
Jason: Lets do it.
Gordon: Wheeeee

This week... HD. Can it be done on a game show? Let's ask the expert. Steve Mosko, head of Sony Pictures TV, says about Jeopardy!, Wheel, Joker's Wild, and Combination Lock in HD... "I'll be the first to admit, I didn't anticipate how much better the shows would look in high-def. I was blown away by the look of the game. High-def has a huge impact. It just jumps off the screen."

Chico: Now we've seen Wheel in HD. They had monitors all over the place. We saw the result. We approved.
Gordon: it looks very very nice
Chico: We've also seen how Jeopardy! could do HD and we have high hopes. We're also hopeful that it translates well into Sony's 2007 offerings.
Jason: It rocks hard.
Gordon: Do they have Media Hoes spinning the Wheel?
Chico: They might if, say, one of them were to grace us with his or her presence.. (Plays "Area Codes") They say I look like Ludacris.. Meanwhile, here comes Cousin Tom!
Jason: Gauer!
Tom: present! Cousin Chico! Good to see all of you again.
Chico: good to be seen. Means I'm not dead.. yet. Back to the hoes, Gordon?
Gordon: In this week's Hodometer...

Break out the Lawsuits! Taylor Hicks sues his ex-producer from capitalizing from his past, while The Donald can continue with his  billion dollar lawsuit. As a quick synopsis, congratulations to The Geniuses, who won Treasure Hunters, and Feedback and Fat Momma as the 2 finalists in Who Wants to be a Superhero. If you want to be the next Pussycat Doll ho, show up at cwtv.com

Tom: I'll be there
Jason: as a judge? or check out pussycat tail?
Tom: I've always been a tail kinda guy and animal lover
Jason: LOL

Dermot O'Leary will be the next host of 1 vs. 100 in the UK, while Les Dennis may be the new host of a show called 'Speculation'. Back to Music Hoes. Constantine Maroulis will go Broadway. As for why Brooke Burke went splitsville a few weeks ago - she now is engaged to David Charvet

Jason: and preggo with his baby.
Tom: My, she's been busy.

If you want to see all the superhoes...I mean Superheroes, you can get the upcoming DVD.

Tom: Wow, what a surprise, it's on DVD!
Chico: It's good enough. It's smart enough. Gosh darn it.. People like it.
Tom: lol
Gordon: Though this doesn't get a pimp cup, it does get an award for sheer stupidity...

After the Jeff Fraza loss on The Contender , there was a brawl and melee, including stabbing. What makes this dumb...this all happened at Fraza's house.

Chico: So what does get a pimp cup?
Jason: Yow that's dumb.
Gordon: This week's Pimp Cup goes to....John Davidson!
Jason: What's he been up to?
Chico: He's the new Don Quixote. Off Broadway, of course. He's dreaming the impossible dream.
Tom: Broadway really is hurting these days, huh?
Gordon: Off-broadway. Any shot of him getting to Broadway? In a trademark phrase from him...'No way, slick'.
Jason: Maroulis is joining "The Wedding Singer" on Sept.
Gordon: and those...are your hoes.
Chico: Heh. End of season reminder... Ho-of-the-week nods will be up for Ho-of-the-year. Voting begins in December.
Tom: Broadway seems to be in the same phase as TV and film, NO NEW IDEAS!
Chico: And... walk it off. Brainvision.. over. Shut it down, fellas.
Jason: Double Mice Flux Capacitor off.
Chico: Choppler safely in the hangar. Next up.. On a roll... or toilet roll... Happy toilet time on the other side of the break. This is the show and we're the guys.

(Brainvision has been brought to you by Who Wants to Be a Supervillain? Got angst? Got unresolved issues? Got a costume? We're looking for you!)

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