July 31, 2006

Chico: Welcome to the Game Show Hall of Justice. I am Kamen Writer, loved by good, feared by evil... and with me as always, my trusty sidekick and enemy of all things suck... uh... little help?
Gordon: I am Haterade. You go catch those villains while I make some refreshing sports drinks.
Chico: And energy filled :-)
Gordon: Nothing but the best in energy filled drinks.
Chico: Nothing but the best. And from somewhere in America... the super edition of We Love to Interrupt ... is... ON! *short fanfare*
Jason: (holds superhero pose)
Gordon: And as we hit Issue #110, we introduce our cast of comic book characters. From Brooklyn, it's Super Cuckoo Clock, Jason Block!
Jason: CAW-CAW! CAW-CAW!
Gordon: And from the depths of West Virginia, we find...Buzzer Boy, Mr. Alex Davis.
Alex: Hello there.
Chico: Hello to you, Alex.
Jason: Hey Alex.
Alex: That's all I have to say. It's still early for me.
Chico: Early for all of us. Late for some :-) Good to have you both. We're starting... with finishes. First, the good kind. Jeopardy!, after a pretty interesting year, is finally taking some time off. We started this season with a superchamp. We ended with not-so-much-a-super-but-super-enough champ.
Jason: They went very late this year. I count only 6 weeks of repeats.
Chico: So do I.
Jason: The grad student was a fun end champ.
Chico: But we end on a pretty good clip, especially if your name is Celeste DiNucci.
Jason: She is in next year's tourney for sure.
Gordon: She sort of has to be. How many 5 time champs were there?
Chico: Counting her... two. Her and Craig Westphal. Interesting backstory, too. Celeste was there on a mission of redemption.
Gordon: Do tell, brother Chico.
Chico: Her brother lost to eventual five-time champ Jerome Vered. That's basically the backstory. They never told us his name. They just told us that Celeste's brother was on Jeopardy at the time of the Vered run and, well, rest writes itself. But she had a plan, and she followed through. Of course, she was lucky a few times, but still, it's all good when you know what you're doing.
Jason: She wasn't a dominant player, but had the goods to be a good champ.
Chico: Totally. She was what you call the well-rounded champion.
Gordon: We all know that at the end of the year, we don't have the 'power' contestants. That's how both Ken Jennings and David Madden made their runs. It also allows a player of a 'good' caliber to run off a string of wins.
Jason: Noted.
Gordon: So...how does she do in the tournament?
Chico: At least semis.
Jason: Agreed.
Chico: So far the lineup isn't looking that darn impressive.
Jason: Not at the moment.
Chico: You have her, Craig Westphal, and the champ while we were at GSC, Bruce Lin. MAYBE.
Alex: Do you blame that on the lack of great contestants this year, or too many good contestants that the field is tough to win multiple days?
Chico: Put me down for one of each.
Gordon: I have to go with lack of great contestants. There are too many 'good' champions that are only there because the leader screwed up Final Jeopardy. Those look to be your top 3 seeds. So on a bad note, there's not much power. On a good note, that means the field is going to be wide open.
Chico: Should make next season that much more exciting.
Jason: I agree with Chico. I think contestants have lost the art of betting.
Chico: Care to reeducate, brother Jason?
Jason: Simply put, too many contestants have not had the stones to put up all their money when they are in 2nd or third.
Chico: So yeah, you have too many good contestants, but at the same time, not many have the cojones to back it up when it counts. The huevos... the hubris, if you will.
Gordon: I disagree with Jason. I think the problem is that the leading contestant hasn't had the stones to put the game out of reach at the end of Double Jeopardy and has to rely way too much on trying to get the Final Jeopardy Answer correct.
Alex: Are we becoming jaded by the likes of Madden and Jennings that a 4 or 5 game winning streak does not seem impressive whatsoever anymore? Sad to say that when I read about an above streak, I'm just like "Oh, whatever then."
Jason: I don't disagree with you. But I also think that too many times you see wimpy bets at the end by the 2nd and 3rd place contestants. How many times have you seen bets of $0 or $1000, expecting the leader to screw it up?
Chico: I'd have to put the favor more in Jason's case. We've seen some wimpy bets in the end.
Alex: Yeah, definitely
Gordon: But that's not bad betting by the players. That's game playing. It's a no-brainer. It's much better strategy to play so that if you get the question wrong, you don't knock yourself out of the game.
Chico: And with rapid-fire thumbs, it's only a tossup until then. But that doesn't change the fact that you have to come in playing 30 minutes of game.
Gordon: That is 30 minutes of game though. Don't get on the contestants because they are using that strategy in play. Get on the champion who decides to not put the game out of reach. The problem isn't the $0 bets on Final Jeopardy. The problem is the $500 bets on the Daily Doubles when the Champion has $15,000 and can go for $5,000 to end the game.
Jason: Again, no stones.
Chico: So it comes down to not having the grapes. Hopefully that's a lesson that Brad Jeffcoat will take into September 11.
Gordon: When David Madden killer Victoria Groce was on the show, she was quite apt when she says that the key to winning on Jeopardy was how to use the Daily Doubles correctly. Bill McDonald played aggressive with them as well.
Jason: So did Ken Jennings.
Gordon: Ken and Madden both did - that's what made them Superchamps - the ability to make Final Jeopardy meaningless. How many times have the Daily Doubles been used well this week?
Chico: Just once that I can remember.
Gordon: Once out of 10. A meaningless 10%. If you go down the past season of Jeopardy, I will guarantee you that maybe only 20% of the Daily Double Betting was strategically meaningful and not an arbitrary $1,500 or $2,000. The Daily Doubles. They are there for a reason. Use them.
Chico: Again, hopefully Brad Jeffcoat will learn that lesson when the season begins again. Meanwhile, we switch to another tripe.. TYPE of ending :-) The bad one... Where we all say "Okay, everyone go home."
Jason: Do you mean..."THE ONE"
Chico: Much to the surprise of... well, no one, "The One" has gotten cancelled.
Jason: Not just cancelled...DONE.
Gordon: We have a historical ending...for the wrong reasons, and for the first time ever in Television History. Now we have had shows cancelled due to low ratings. We have even had reality shows yanked after 1 episode (see The Will), but this is the first time that a competition featuring live performers in a live atmosphere has been yanked before it's completion.
Chico: In essence, a competition with no winner.
Jason: Pretty much.
Gordon: A Live Reality Show Talent Competition with no winner.
Chico: And I think I speak for everyone when I say... THANK GOODNESS!
Alex: I think we're all the winners.
Jason: Agreed.
Gordon: Even Are You Hot and All-American Girl finished their runs. At least Last Comic Standing and Celebrity Cooking Showdown finished. Albeit buried on Saturday nights, but they finished. This...never did.
Chico: Nothing against George Stromboulopolopolopolopodingdong... but that show REEKED!
Gordon: George Snuffleupagus was better off looking for big bird. Can I have a Big Board please?
Jason: BRING...IT...DOWN!

Gordon: The Subject Matter...The One. The making of a historical disaster.
Jason: Got it.
Gordon: Fell free to all chime in, since I know we all have strong opinions on this one.
Jason: One...a crappy host. Two...horrible talent
Chico: Three: Knockoff.
Jason: Four...incomprehensible rules. Five...no one cared about the talent.
Gordon: Six: They not only copied, they copied the stuff we HATED about the bad shows.
Alex: I just love that someone actually copied FOX. What irony
Chico: Funny. ABC said the same thing, Alex.
Jason: And did it ABYSMALLY bad.
Gordon: We don't want drama in our music competition (like Rockstar). We don't want the final 3 judges determining who goes home (Rock Star, again).
Alex: So yeah. Just remember that ABC let Millionaire's contract expire to show stuff like this.
Chico: And sure as hell we don't want the contestants to have a say.
Gordon: And the most bizarre one - we don't want the voters deciding who leaves, as you usually eliminate the drama - and in this case, once Aubrey left, so did the only interesting character in the show.
Alex: What's wrong with ABC recently.
Chico: How can I put this... EVERYTHING.
Alex: They are on the fast track to being number 4. I really see NBC crushing ABC this season. Since we're a game show place, their game department is kinda lackluster. Set For Life is a major Deal or no Deal clone and will fail.
Gordon: I was about to go there. ABC is starting to look like Already Been Cloned.
Alex: The Con Test (PokerFace) is a tossup. It deserves to survive, but I don't know if the public will embrace it. Beyond game shows, they have a very weak lineup. And, oh yeah, they let their most popular show ever slip away.
Chico: If I may quote Seth MacFarlane here. "Don't make a television show about a group of survivors of a plane crash unless you know where you're going with it. Otherwise, it's going to start to suck rather quickly."
Gordon: They didn't let it slip away as much as they let it run into the ground...and it looks like NBC is not going to listen to what happened to Millionaire.
Chico: Yeah, we figured that out with the Wednesday airing of Deal.
Alex: I'm not so much worried about Deal or No Deal as I am about 1 vs 100. NBC is 100% messing that show up
Chico: See this week's NG Weekly Rant.
Jason: Nope. If things continue, I predict a two season deal for DonD
Chico: So yeah, we mourn the passing of "The One" with a haughty point-and-laugh... *points & laughs*
Gordon: BWA HA HA HA HA
Jason: Ha-Ha! We told you so.
Chico: Morons.
Alex: haha
Chico: Anyways... Next up, Ken Jennings has word.. and they're either not that funny or not that kind or something...
Jason: The biggest non-story story of the week if you ask me.
Chico: Basically put, Jason.
Gordon: Just in case you've been living under a rock, Ken posted some goofy stuff on his web site blasting Jeopardy and the New York Post called him on it.
Jason: "supposedly blasting"....
Chico: then the AP, then other news agencies. All of a sudden, Ken holds back on his words...
Alex: This sounds like a Colbert Report segment gone awry. And for actual news sources, that's very scary.
Chico: You want to see Colbert Report gone awry, go to my blog :-)
Alex: ha, I'm working on mine. What I love about this story is that a New York news source's headline is "Jeopardy! Champ Ken Jennings Denies Bashing the Game Show"
Gordon: Oh I have to disagree here. I think as a celebrity, you ARE responsible for what you write. I also have to still think that he did it for 2 reasons. 1. There is something there between Jennings and Trebek/Jeopardy and 2. Did anyone notice that Ken boy has a new book coming out that it only around 7,000 or so on Amazon?
Chico: Isn't there a book coming out? And doesn't he have an agent? I mean, call me skeptical...
Alex: Which makes him sound crazy, not with a sense of humor.
Chico: I said "CALL ME SKEPTICAL..."
Gordon: YOU'RE SKEPTICAL
Chico: Thank you :-). Anyhoo, I don't see this kind of thing happening without someone feeding the snake so to speak. I mean, Ken Jennings has an agent. This sort of thing doesn't just happen... without an agent precipitating the whole thing.
Jason: His agent may get fired. He dropped 6000 sales rankings on Amazon from yesterday to today - from 8000-14,000 or so.
Gordon: So much for there's no such thing as bad publicity. Ouch.
Alex: I just don't see how people could take this literally. It's so bizarre it can't be, and it just proves that people have no sense of humor anymore.
Chico: Except it did happen, and you're scratching your head as to "What the hell just happened?" Now the big question: Do you buy into the whole thing?
Jason: What happened was two fold. Ken's humor wasn't understood by the "mainstream media" and the media didn't fact check.  And yes, there is something between Ken and J! I do believe that.
Gordon: I think that what Ken did, whether in jest or not, was a terrible lack of judgment on his part. You NEVER bite the hand that feeds you in public, even if it's a playful nibble, without some sort of note that it was CLEARLY satire.
Alex: I just think it was a case of misunderstood humor and nothing more. It's pathetic that Jennings has to explain his joke, but oh well. I've talked to Mr. Jennings over the phone, and that is just how he is: an extremely dry sarcastic person.
Gordon: And that's my point, Alex. If you are talking about someone near and dear to you, and you have to explain what you meant and apologize, then you are better off not saying it.
Chico: Old saying: "The joke isn't funny if you have to explain it." Oops.
Gordon: He is very dry and sarcastic, and unfortunately, sarcasm traditionally does not travel well over the 'net, as I am sure you have noticed in the Palace.
Chico: Well, surely you remember a few times when someone's been.. you know... the lovable jerk or something.
Alex: And yes, sarcasm doesn't transfer well over text. That's why I feel they owned him, uh, a phone call....
Jason: I agree with that.
Alex: Honestly, they could have easily got a hold of his publicist and do what journalists do: confirm things. It's not the National Enquirer for Christ's sake
Chico: No. They have their own "Department" for that :-)
Jason: Look what Brad Rutter has done with his fame...zip. He keeps his mouth shut, hosts his show and invests his millions.
Gordon: I agree with that as well. This is a case of neither group doing their job - Jennings for not doing enough to show it was satire and The Post for not checking to see that it was.
Chico: So this is a while story that shouldn't have happened... At least we get something to talk about. Speaking of talking... a few people may be doing more of that... on GSN's two new quizzers. It's preview time!
Alex: Here we go
Chico: "It's peanut butter preview time, peanut butter preview time, peanut butter preview, peanut butter preview..."
Gordon: Someone has been watching a bit too much Family Guy for my liking.
Chico: Never :-). This Tuesday marks GSN's return to the standard two side quizzer format since "Cram" in 2004.
Alex: And yet Cram is better than one of them somehow. I'll let you guess which one.
Chico: Tuesday at 9, an hour of happy fun with Chain Reaction and Starface. First, Chain Reaction, a revival of the 80s show. Interesting fact: the franchise is only one of two shows that have taped in three cities regularly. The other: Lingo.
Alex: Chain Reaction is eh. It's semi-entertaining, and that is it. Michael Davies really fumbled on this one
Chico: You're saying it's mostly harmless?
Alex: Oh definitely harmless. It's much better than, say, WinTuition. However, it's one of the stereotypical new shows that wants to be something it isn't. They just messed this one up. The gameplay is fine. Everything else is really bad about it.
Chico: My thing is: The play's the thing. The game's the game. And so long as they don't deviate from it, I'm not going to have that much of a problem with it.
Jason: Same here. I like the show. I think this is going to rock.
Alex: Sad thing is that it has nothing to fall back on. The bonus has one major flaw. The host is really bad. It wants to look and feel like something that it isn't.
Chico: What's the one major flaw? I mean, you can say that the bonus for Lingo season zero had one major flaw. Granted, it was corrected.
Alex: It has the, what I call, "Card Sharks" flaw. You can get 7 right and double your money to potentially a ton... And still lose. You can be a winner and still feel like you lost. That bugs me completely, much like the Car game on Card Sharks. You could win $20K, and still feel like you're a loser.
Chico: I don't care who you are, if I win $20K, I'm a winner :-)
Gordon: So how can you lose in Chain Reaction?
Alex: If you don't get all 10
Gordon: What's the financial difference between 9 and 10?
Alex: When I was at the taping, the team got 9 words right, and they made us go "Awww" as if they lost. Even though they doubled to $6,200. 0-6 = Same. 7-9 = Double. 10 = Triple.
Gordon: So all ten would have been $9,300
Alex: Yes.
Chico: I recall the same thing happening on Russian Roulette. You get $500 for each right answer the bonus. You can still win up to $5000 if you lost... Granted, $5000 don't do much in the gamescape of the multi-million dollar jackpot world.
Alex: Russian Roulette came at a time when there were no million dollar shows anymore.
Chico: But still.. that's money in the bank.
Alex: Except Millionaire really. So even then, 10K was a ton. If you won 5K, it was a genuine loss, because you didn't complete the Killer Questions.
Chico: And besides, it's GSN. Not exactly the home of the big money game show. That's like $9000 split between three players. So think about that.
Gordon: There doesn't seem enough of a gap between 9 and 10 to go awwww, in my opinion
Chico: Nah. Sounds like an over-presentation.
Alex: And I know I harp on this, but Dylan is just bad. Even worse in edited form. I could count in seconds the amount of time he didn't look at his monitor or the teleprompter. The only issue I have with the gameplay also is the Speed Chain. They barely have any outcome on the gameplay because they lowered the value of them.
Gordon: Well, If you're going to do something, have meaning in it, right?
Chico: Yep. Don't do the $2 million question all over again. You remember You Don't Know Jack, right?
Alex: Exactly.
Jason: I agree with that.
Alex: Each word in round 1 is $100, including the speed chain. Each speedchain is the value of one word It would have been much easier to just add a word to the main game chain.
Gordon: So what about Starface? Tell us a little about that show.
Alex: It's really simple. Bonaduce introduces a picture, contestants have to guess who it is, and then they do 5-7 questions about the person in the picture and then there are lots of different segments, like Hot Corner, where they do mugshots. Below the Beltway is pictures of the lower half of politicians until the picture is revealed. The final round is fun, where contestants have to
put on masks of that day's celebrity and answer questions like they are that celebrity.
Jason: Like Role Play on PTI
Alex: And the bonus is a simple either/or decision. 10 right gives you a trip somewhere. First off, I think it rivals Jeopardy! for most questions asked in a half hour. It goes at lightning pace. There is not 30 seconds, beyond the contestant interview segment, without a question. Second off, it's extremely funny. Fits right along with The Soup and Best Week Ever.  Third: Danny Bonaduce is TERRIFIC. He's a bit raspy and stiff for the first 5 minutes of the first episode, but he improves and stays there for the remaining episode I saw.  It has a very catchy theme. A very nice set. Good game play, and accomplishes being funny. Very good host. It's everything that it sets out to be.
Chico: So yeah, you have all of those stuff, and we'll get to see it Tuesday. As we welcome our newest hero, Doughnutman, Don Harpwood.
Alex: Yeah, enjoy. Not much more I can talk about without you seeing it. So anyway, there we go.
Don: Can't wait to see it.
Alex: Here's my major issue. If I can talk about it a bit more.
Chico: A bit more, then we must move forward.
Alex: I know people will go into Chain Reaction already assuming high heavens about it because of its classic run. And people will go into StarFace thinking bad because it's a brainless pop culture game. I hope people don't do this, because StarFace kicks the everliving crap out of Chain Reaction. And I'm done.
Chico: And we're moving to the reason why we've done this whole superhero thing this week... Stan Lee's "Who Wants to Be a Superhero". It's a bird... it's a plane... it's a ... subtle hint of wrong. A clever subtle hint of wrong, but a subtle hint of wrong.
Gordon: It's Supercheese!
Don: I haven't seen it.
Chico: But it's the finest schtick that we all need right now. Basic premise for Don..
Gordon: The first 30 minutes of the show is the cheesiest half hour of reality television that you will ever see.
Chico: Average Americans don superhero outfits of their own design and compete to earn a) their own comic and b) their own movie on SciFi. Example heroes: Monkey Woman... Cell Phone Girl... Fat Momma... and my personal favorite... Major Victory. "Be a winner... not a wiener."
Don: Heh.
Gordon: This is cheese to the nth level. But a funny thing happens in the second half hour...they actually have a stunt that works.
Chico: Ah, the first stunt. Actually pretty clever.
Alex: All I'll say is that I miss the days of Mystery Science Theater 3000
Chico: DVD, Alex. If you miss those days, it's your own fault :-)
Alex: True. lol
Gordon: The stunt is to change clothes and get to the exit. However, Stan Lee puts a crying kid near the finish line. Actually, 4 people catch on to it.
Don: Sounds quite clever.
Chico:  Remember the crying kid from "Spider-Man 2" for the PS2? She was kinda like that. Only instead of shouting "Where's My BALLOOON!?!??" she shouts "Where's my mom?!"
Gordon: Major Victory, Lumira, Cell Phone Woman and Fat Momma all stop to help out the kid. Everyone else...doesn't, and that proves deadly to Nitro G, who gets eliminated by Stan Lee.
Chico: So... will every challenge be like this? Will SciFi actually put out an entertaining competition for a change?
Gordon: This is still cheesy McCheese, but it elevates itself to at least guilty pleasure cheese.
Chico: Agreed.
Gordon: We'll see if it gets it's own rhythm going on in the second episode.
Chico: I'd give it a season pass. We move from the funny to the serious for a bit...
Gordon: As the comic book characters sometimes use a closet to change their outfits, a different star is using the closet...to come out.
Chico: Lance Bass, who lost Match Game on GSM, revealed that he was in a stable relationship with Amazing Race winner Reichen Lemkuehl. Thoughts?
Gordon: Well, now we know why he dressed up as a banana on Let's Make a Deal.
Chico: Bad Gordon... No home game =p
Gordon: Seriously - good for him. If he's comfortable enough to come out, and if that makes him happy, then it's great. Of course, for us, it makes news because of both of their game show roots. But it brings something else up in my mind...we cover game shows on all channels. BET, SCI-FI, BRAVO, etc. We've never covered a game show on Logo. Why?
Chico: A) I don't get it. B) I don't hear of anything on it.
Gordon: The correct answer is...C). There's never been a game show on Logo.
Chico: Which you justify a and b.
Gordon: Exactly. Now...can I have a Big Board, Chico?
Chico: Big Board the Sequel.

Gordon: Topic... Gayme Show Contestants
Chico: Richard Hatch.
Gordon: Chip and Reichen from Amazing Race. Lance Bass (of course)
Chico: Ami from Survivor 9.
Don: Marcellas (Big Brother 3).
Gordon: Brandon from Survivor 3. Scout from Survivor 9. Sonya from Survivor 1
Alex: Poor Lance Bass. Lest we knew what Bi Bi Bi meant to him really.
Chico: .. Bad Alex.. No home game. =p
Alex: I could make more bad jokes
Gordon: and Rosie O' Donnell, of course.
Chico: But we know where this is going.
Gordon: and Will Wikle from Big Brother 5...who is now doing a Travel Show for Logo. So with all of these gay contestants, when will we see a gay game show on Logo?
Chico: Universal answer: when it becomes profitable.
Alex: There is one being planned, actually. There were listings for The
Dating Game and Newlywed Game on Craigslist ages ago. Well, not ages. Months. They were specifically looking for gay people
Chico: Months are ages in Craigslist time. Remember Groundhog Date? Seems like ages... and nothing came of it.
Alex: Thank jesus.
Gordon: If Lance Bass and Rosie O'Donnell, arguably, the 2 most mainstream gay stars out there, decide to pool their talents for a gay game show, then wouldn't you think one would come up soon?
Alex: We do have I've Got A Secret, which is apparently not being picked up again. According to producer Gary Green, as he has moved to a new place to work.
Don: Really?
Alex: Serious. Which is a shame, since it's the finest show GSN has done in years and years and years
Don: Wow. I'm surprised.
Chico: Same here.
Alex: So am I. Ratings are really good for it. Above Lingo.
Gordon: Last time I checked, it was on GSN and not Logo, though it wouldn't be a bad idea should Logo pick it up for season 2.
Chico: They could've gotten another producer...  Okay, so Reichen & Lance. All the best to you. Meanwhile, we've got more news where that came from... Let's do the news!
Alex: News time!
Gordon: Roll That Beautiful Brain Footage


Doug:  (impersonating Mark Thompson) From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, featuring the Award-Winning Brainvision News team.

Chico: I got first.

We start with some sad news from the game show world, as we mourn the passing of 50s pop star and Video Village castmember Eileen Barton.

Chico: You may remember her from her song "If I Knew You Were Coming (I'd Have Baked a Cake)." She will be deeply missed.

(silence)

Gordon: Thank you
Chico: And thanks to Tammy Warner for helping us out with that item.
Alex: OH, that reminds me, lol. I read your thing about 1 vs 100 and my beard, Chico. You aren't escaping.
Chico: I know, I know. I'll have pictures later.
Alex: I have a picture from this morning at 6AM with my beard for proof. I have it right now.
Chico: Next article?

Last week, we spoke about 2 NBC hits that will be coming back. This week, we get to talk about 2 FOX hits coming back. So You Think You Can Dance and Hell's Kitchen both come back for another summer of silliness.

Chico: Another season of dancing sillies and Gordon Ramsay telling big-chested women to get their (^_^)ing (^_^)s off his hotplate.
Gordon: Which is not a bad thing.
Chico: What, Gordon Ramsay or the (^_^)ing (^_^)s?
Gordon: C. All of the above.
Don: And the fact that those shows are staying in the summer sounds like a good thing.
Chico: Very.
Gordon: That too, Don. It's nice to see that they are smart enough to know what belongs in the Summer.
Chico: Wunderbar. Next...

Looking for Catwalk and America's Brainiest on My Network TV in the fall? Better stop looking. They're going the route of all telenovela, all the time.

Chico: Boo My Network TV... HOORAY BEER! :-)
Alex: Yeah that's a shame. That channel is on my Dead to Me list now, thanks to Stephen Colbert.
Chico: You saw the Notice.
Gordon: I can't imagine how My Network TV is going to get any sort of ratings this way.
Alex: I've moved it from notice to dead to me.
Chico: Damns. As to how MyTV will get any ratings this way... It won't. If I want telenovelas, I'll watch Telefutura... they got the really good ones there.
Alex: With nudity!
Chico: AND... Julio Cesar Palomera announcing Que Dice La Gente. :-)
Gordon: If you're a fledgling network, you want to throw everything against the wall and see what sticks, instead of hoping that someone will watch a show in Primetime for 13 straight weeks. This is a disaster waiting to happen.
Chico: This is a disaster in the making is what it is.
Alex: Hey, i Network may move up in the world.
Gordon: Speaking of disasters, who wants some Haterade?
Alex: I love it.
Chico: *Haterade is first ade, for that deep down body suck.*

This week's Haterade goes to Simon Cowell, who was caught cheating. Fortunately, it wasn't in terms of rigging a show. Unfortunately, it was with a woman...and Cowell is already in a relationship. Oops.

Don: Yipes.
Chico: Woops!
Alex: Looks like we know who will be winning The Ex Factor this year. That one was terrible, I'm sorry.
Chico: Terri Seymour. *Makes call me motion*
Gordon: Too bad he was a week late to make the divorce list from last week. I think Simon probably needs to be fully loaded by now.
Chico: With WHAT? :-)
Gordon: You tell us, Chico.
Chico: This week, we're going to YouTube...

Christopher Wong's new documentary, "The Wheel of Jeopardy!", which features a good bit of game show fandom from far and wide, many of whom are good friends of ours, is previewing its trailer on YouTube.

Chico: In it, a guy named Block, a guy named Schantz, a guy named Beverly, and three guys named Suchard.
Gordon: Or one guy and two ladies.
Don: Nice.
Gordon: What's the link?
Chico: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8oixZWxaZYs&search=%22Wheel%20of%20Jeopardy%22 It only works if you have the latest version of Flash, though. Better gaming through technology. That's Fully Loaded :-) And speaking of which, New Englanders have a chance to become Media Hoes. How is that possible? *plays "Area Codes*"
Gordon: I also think that Mr. Cowell may be looking for some media ho love right about now...

In this week's Hodometer, the Wheelmobile shows up in Providence on September 16th, so you can be a Media ho! In other news, you all know about Lance and Reichen, while Dick Clark will be honored at the Emmys. Richard Hatch gets a 51 month sentence, AI's Top Ten Finalists will visit George Bush in the White House...which will have a returning Katharine McPhee on it.

Alex: Those poor 10 people

Meanwhile in Hoes on Film, AI's Ryan Starr gets to be in the horror movie 'Ring of Power', playing the girlfriend of a singer in a reality contest, while Survivor's Jesse Camacho is in Crossbones, playing a...reality show contestant. A real stretch, eh? Lest we forget Tana Goertz hawking Bedazzlers on late night TV.

Don: Ah, I saw that commercial at one point.
Gordon: That too, and speaking of the Apprentice, The ho of the week goes to...Donald Trump, for getting on Hollywood's Walk of Fame. Congratulations!
Chico: I bet he had no problem affording that star.
Gordon: I'm guessing not. And those...are your hoes.
Chico: Good job. Now we go to break, as we infiltrate Whammyville up next.
This is WLTI, the show that gets it groove on.

(Brainvision has been brought to you by Hell's Bitchin'. The ladies of Hell's Kitchen fight back as they force Gordon Ramsay to cook means for all of them - in 60 minutes)

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