Episode 22.13
December 7

Chico: Hey, friends, this is Chico Alexander, and I have one word for you... REGIS.
Josh: (Applauds)
Joe: /me yawns
Chico: That's called equal time, folks. On one hand... Regis in the host chair. On the other hand, it doesn't really change what has up until now been a stinky season.
Gordon: (stares blankly)
Chico: And Gordon stares blankly. We'll get into this, plus continue our journey back through the 10 Years in 2 Months...
Gordon: We'll discuss December's follies as...from somewhere in America...this week's edition of We Love To Interrupt...is...on!
Chico: Woo!
Josh: Wahoo!
Gordon: Gordon and Chico here. Joining us, from somewhere in PA, Joe Mello.
Joe: I empathize with Cornhusker fans
Gordon: And also from somewhere in PA....Agent Josh
Chico: So we have two from PA and one from NY with another one with family from NY.
Josh: And I am trying to deal with a pro team that has lost their last three games.
Chico: You too? But enough grousing over that. We have a theme here... and this week.. it's Battles for the Ages.
Josh: Ooooh.
Chico: First up, we start with Regis vs. the Clock... round 2.
Joe: /me yawns
Josh: *crooks an eyebrow at Joe* Did you get a good night's sleep, Joe?
Joe: Yeah, during Millionaire
Josh: .......owch
Chico: Now an interesting thing about this week's worth of episodes. It's the latest taped...and... there's no Phone-A-Friend. They follow up on the threat and yank the lifeline.
Josh: They sure did.
Chico: So we're left with Double Dip, Ask The Audience, and Ask the Expert. Me... I think it's lost its charm.
Josh: It's lost just about everything that was part of the original ideas.
Chico: Now ratings are up since the Tournament of 10, but does it really matter at this point?
Joe: Of course it does
Chico: Tell me why it matters.
Joe: Higher ratings means more episodes. Higher ratings means that whatever the prods are doing is a good thing.
Gordon: I don't think its a done deal that Millionaire is canned. It may be renewed.
Chico: That may be true... Millionaire may be renewed, but for me at least, I'd rather have a few episodes of high quality and that sense of magic... than a lot of episodes... of crap.
Josh: I don't know if we'll see another Tourney of 10 because of it's anti-climatic ending, but....
Joe: Forget about the game. They're making money, and that's the bottom line for any TV show. Millionaire will end as soon as it's no longer economically feasible to tape more episodes.
Chico: Isn't that always the case?
Josh: Yah, and the economics depend on how many people watch the darn shows.
Chico: And though people are watching the shows, iy doesn't really do much for what Millionaire was and what it is.
Joe: Apparently, no one really cares about the changes around the format, since it's still (in essence) 15 questions and you win.
Chico: So it would seem.
Joe: Even though you may get 1 person per week to get to Question 11.
Chico: I just don't like it when you try and fix something that wasn't broken.
Gordon: I liked the Phone-A-Friend, just because it adds to the character and personality of the contestant. Sometimes the friend helps, and sometimes he doesn't.
Josh: Doesn't Ask The Expert do that too? I remember seeing this week the expert not knowing the answer and he struggled with it.
Chico: Yeah, but you almost lose the mystique of "the local flavor". After all, the PAF makes up another bit of the pastiche that is the player's life.
Gordon: The expert this week - Regis' producer Michael Gelman. Let's just say that he's not the expert I would want to see if Im a contestant.
Chico: And that! It seems to me like you don't know who the "expert" will be... but you do know your freiends.
Joe: Well, Gelman was a celeb PAF, and you can't go too far past Regis without finding Gelman...
Josh: If it was a TV trivia question, I'd be ok with it.
Gordon: Not only do you know your fiends, you know how they would help you. The expert is an utter crap shoot.
Chico: Can we see a rundown of the questions Gelman had to answer this week?
Joe: Should be easy to do
Gordon: Let's see them. And Laugh. big Bored please?

Chico: This one's called "Who Wants to Be a Gelman?" Let's see how you'd do.

For many seasons, the theme song of my hit show "The Apprentice" has been "For the Love of Money," a 1973 single by what group?

[$12,500] (CELEBRITY Q: Donald Trump)
A: The Temptations
B: The Bee Gees
C: The O'Jays
D: The Carpenters

Gordon: C. O'Jays
Josh: I will guess C.
Joe: I don't watch The Donald, so I would've needed a lifeline.
Chico: Gelman said either A or C. so he got that one... 50%, but he got that one. Player had to use the Double Dip on both of them.
Gordon: I can't say Gelman got that one if the contestant had to use another Lifeline after the guess.
Joe: From that, I would've gotten C, because I know a lot of Temptations
Chico: I know it's C. Because... well, I watch the show.
Josh: I just love listening to music.
Chico: Me too. Next...

[$25,000] (In the Dictionary)
"Xerostomia" is a fancy word for what common medical symptom?
A: Itchy scalp
B: Dry mouth
C: Night sweats
D: Runny nose

Josh: This was the one I saw.
Chico: What did you think it was?
Josh: I knew it wasn't A because that's Dandruff, and It wasn't D (Contestant had the same Idea I had...)
Josh: I thought it was B
Chico: It was B. Gelman... had no idea.
Joe: I would be with Gelman
Josh: BUT, Reeg did mention that Gelman was a bit of a health research nut.
Chico: Reeg mentions a lot of things! :-)
Josh: So it was more like an EPIC fail rather than a regular fail.
Gordon: Gelman Record so far: 0-2.
Chico: Next question...

[$25,000] (Taking Shape)
Used by those who prefer not to mix Latin and Greek roots, an enneagon is a less common name for what shape?
A: Pentagon
B: Hexagon
C: Heptagon
D: Nonagon

Josh: I'll say D. They sound similar.
Chico: You said D. I thought D as well. Look at that, we're both right. Gelman... had no idea. AGAIN.
Josh: 0-3
Chico: So the contestant walked. Next question, Gelman almost certainly knew the answer to...

[$7,500] (Celebrities)
What actor is married to an actress who is often referred to in the tabloids as "SJP"?
A: Antonio Banderas
B: Ben Affleck
C: Matthew Broderick
D: Kevin Bacon

Josh: Easy pop fly of an answer...C
Joe: Of course, I pop out on pop culture :P I was at least one step ahead of the contestant, knowing who SJP was
Chico: Everyone who's ever heard of S&TC knows who SJP is. And Gelman knows... all of that. He got it right with C.
Gordon: Hey! He got one!
Chico: So we established that he's good at celebrity stuff, but not good at obscure vocabulary. This would be the last one with "In The News" for $15,000.

[$15,000] (In the News)
In 2009 what world leader was famous photographed riding a horse shirtless?
a) Nicolas Sarkozy
b) Mahmous Ahmadinejad
c) Hu Jintao
d) Vladimir Putin

Josh: Considering that Regis and Kelly look at the newspapers daily for top of the show conversation fodder, should be good.
Chico: Gelman definitely knows this one... D.
Joe: Or Matthew Broderick, but that wouldn't be news.
Josh: D, definitely
Chico: "Gelman knows his shirtless horse-riders."
Joe: So he was a current events guy, and that was it.
Chico: Well, you work on Live, you almost have to be.
Josh: Hallelujah and Amen.
Gordon: Total record for Gelman: 2-3
Chico: Meredith'll be back Monday and hopefully we'll have an expert who knows more about other things than current events. Not that that's a bad thing, mind you, but an expert needs to run the gamut.
Josh: Like an Ogi
Chico: What's Russell Hantz's record on extreme eliminations?
Gordon: 11-0.



Chico: Basically, if Russell said you were gone... you were gone.
Gordon: Pretty much. And since he now has control of the tribe, it's a matter of picking off the Galus. 1st Galu up - John, who Russell made the mistake of telling that he has another hidden idol.
Chico: And he does get rid of John.
Josh: He's sniping them off.
Chico: Now it's coming down to it. I'm wondering if Russell has thought endgame yet.
Josh: I wouldn't be surprised if he already has an endgame stratagem calculated.
Gordon: Maybe. The next 2 gone must be Dave and Monica, in that order. Then you grab Shambo, use her as the extra person, team up with Jaison, and knock out your 2 soon to be ex-teammates. Then plan on your million dollar winning speech in front of the jury.
Josh: Mr. Pepper, have you auditioned for Survivor?
Gordon: Nope. Though I probably should.
Joe: As good as Russell is, I still can't help but think he's destined for the hundred grand
Chico: You're basically thinking "Okay... who will I have the easiest time against?"
Gordon: If he brings Shambo to the end, he wins.
Chico: That's basically it right there.
Gordon: If anyone left brings Shambo to the end, they win.
Chico: He has to keep Shambo in the pocket. That's not going to be a problem consider who's left. People tend to shoot themselves in the foot this season. And I wouldn't be surprised if Monica was holding the revolving revolver next week.
Gordon: We haven't really seen anyone (besides Russell) use any semblance of strategy.
Chico: ... Nope.
Joe: I still think there are some intangibles that are yet to be dealt with
Chico: Example, Joe.
Joe: Well, it looks like Russell's too smart for the island.
Chico: That's obvious.
Gordon: Russell hasn't won this yet. I agree with Joe. Someone's going to figure out that if Russell gets to the finals, he wins, and they may band to get rid of him before then, Call it Yau Man revisited.
Chico: I have a feeling that Russell's going to figure out that he's targeted before hand. Again, like you said, he's too smart for the island.
Gordon: Right now, its not a problem. They need his vote. Once you get down to 4 or 3, the parameters change immensely. I think Russell may need to look at that junction.
Chico: I think he already has.
Joe: If it's Russell vs. Generic Survivor, the jury may pick Generic purely out of spite.
Gordon: I don't think so. You see Russell being venomous to the camera, but you don't see a lot of Russell being venomous towards people.
Josh: You still have to curry favor to the jury.
Chico: I haven't see him be nearly as snarky in Tribal, where you really can't afford to be. So as long as he keeps to himself, he's in with a chance.
Gordon: You don't see people being annoyed at Russell. You see them annoyed at their fellow tribesmen for being morons. I think this group will vote for the best person, strategically.
Joe: We can only hope
Chico: So that said, congratulations to Shambo for winning Survivor. heh.
Josh: heh!
Joe: Once the moron is on the Jury, will they still be a moron? That will be the big question
Josh: Can a leopard change his spots, Joe?
Joe: Stranger things have happened
Chico: It ain't over 'til it's over.
Josh: "That's why you play the game"
Gordon: You mean like people who can't spell Franz?
Chico: Yep.
Joe: uh oh



Chico: The Globetrotting's over for the Globetrotters.
Josh: Someone hand me a plate of crow.
Chico: Right.
Joe: Did Franz Ferdinand take them out?
Chico: *ding!* Joe wins.
Joe: Tip your veal. Try the waitress
Gordon: Franz did, and Gordon called it last week.
Chico: I can tell you precisely what went wrong. The roadblock.
Josh: The roadblock was in honor of Franz Kafka.
Chico: The Roadblock took place in Prague's Ekotechnicke Museum. Imagine a room filled with telephones, all ringing.
Joe: I'd rather not
Josh: I'd go nuts pretty quick.
Chico: They had to get five letters from those phones. Those letters spelled FRANZ, a reference to Franz Kafka. Rather than finish the Roadblock, Big Easy elected to take a time penalty.
Josh: Pardon me....*puts on a crash helmet*
Chico: Careful, dude.
Josh: *hits head against wall repeatedly*
Chico: Ouch. Now Roadblocks, being the most strenuous of required tasks... carried the most damning time penalty... four hours. That was the difference between elimination and racing for a million dollars.
Gordon: You have all 5 letters. F.R.A.N.Z. How hard can this possibly be?
Chico: Maybe they were thinking Thundercats and tried to spell "Znarf"... which would also be wrong. But yeah, the Trotters fail the Roadblock, and I believe that this might be a first for this season, but instead of finishing the leg, the team is directed directly to the Pit Stop. So no cryotherapy for them.
Gordon: It hasn't happened in a while.
Chico: Now we're left with Meghan & Cheyne (the favorites), Sam & Dan, and Brian & Ericka. If I were to pick the team to show up at the Vegas finish line first... it would be Meghan & Cheyne. They're on a hot streak.
Gordon: The finals for Amazing Race will be this past Sunday (in which this episode is done before then, so we won't know who wins.) The finale for The Ultimate Fighter was this past Saturday, and we DO have the results.
Chico: I'd say hit me, but considering the subject matter.... *hits Josh*
Josh: *blocks*
Gordon: Roy Nelson KO's Brendan Schaub in the first round to win the title.
Chico: That was quick.
Joe: Whoops
Josh: In the UFC, expect ANYTHING
Chico: We always do.
Gordon: Nelson, who defeated Kimbo Slice in round one, gets 1 Ko, 2 TKOs and a Majority decision in a season where he was overpowering.
Chico: Yep.
Josh: He truly is ready for the UFC.
Gordon: So is Rashard Evans - as a coach. Evans team goes a combined 13-7 for the best winning percentage ever in the history of the show.
Chico: Very nice. You know, Kimbo also fought in the Ultimate finale... He won, but in the end, it didn't really change the fact that he was beat by the guy who ultimately took the whole ultimate thing. Ultimate.
Josh: Speaking of Kimbo, did his presence bolster the ratings any?
Joe: I have a rating number of 2.6 for the finale
Josh: And season wide?
Joe: 4.1 for the opener, 5.3 for Kimbo Slice, and the next highest was 2.9
Chico: So the finale wasn't that attractive. And Spike was hyping Kimbo Slice to almost comical levels, only to have him lose.
Joe: Ratings were slowly tanking as the season went on. Bottoming out at 2.4 for Ep 10. Moral of the Story: Kimbo Slice is a one-hit wonder (pun not intended)
Chico: *ding*
Gordon: I would say the Kimbo factor was a major pull for the show. They just needed him as a contender on longer. Without him, the ratings got sliced.
Chico: Perhaps if he got a better pairing than the guy who would've won it.
Josh: Speaking of gimmicks that might work....
Chico: We have the coaches for TUF11. We'll take Tito Ortiz and Chuck Liddell for $1000.
Josh: THERE'S SOME GOOD NEWS!
Joe: I approve
Josh: Those two have an intense UFC rivalry, and both were great coaches in their respective seasons of TUF
Gordon: That should be a great match-up.
Chico: That's going to be a good match up. Another good matchup this week...Bobby Flay vs. Masaharu Morimoto.
Joe: Oh snap
Josh: *drools*
Chico: The Iron Chef Holiday Ice Battle.
Josh: Flay/Morimoto three.
Chico: A little bit of history here...
Joe: Just a little
Chico: The Iron Chef New York Battle at Webster Hall. that went to Morimoto.
Josh: But Flay cited faulty equipment
Chico: The Iron Chef Millennium Special in Kitchen Stadium Japan.... that went to Flay. So the Holiday Ice Battle... that would decide the rivalry. And we have a nice little touch with dishes carved out of ice, as in "the serving pieces", not the dishes themselves. The theme ingredient... egg nog.
Joe: I'll drink to that
Josh: Was it egg nog with or without booze?
Chico: They didn't say. One of Morimoto's highlights... creating a cold smoker out of ice.
Josh: That was a cross of Japanese Cuisine and Alton Brown imagination.
Chico: Basically. He also redid something he did in the 1998 Christmas Turkey Battle. That is, he took a fowl, put in some egg nog, and put it all in a pig bladder and cooked it.
Josh: Kinda like a vessie.
Chico: Exactly like a vessie. On the other side, Flay had a crab salad with tuna... yum...Lobster egg nog country captain. Yum.
Josh: Yum again
Chico: And an egg nog trifle. Morimoto did a green tea tiramisu, not a trifle.
Gordon: I just figure that you don't trifle with a trifle or a truffle.
Chico: No truffle, G. That would just be wrong. But you probably just want to know who won.
Joe: A shiny fake nickel says tie.
Gordon: I'll say Morimoto
Josh: I already know the result, (I watched the darn thing three times!)
Chico: Because you're a big fan, Josh. The winner... by one point...Iron Chef Morimoto!
Josh: HOORAY!
Chico: The breakdown...

Taste: 28-24 Flay.
Plating: 15-12 Morimoto.
Originality: 14-12 Morimoto.

Chico: That is a perfect score in plating, by the way.
Joe: So style trumps substance
Chico: As is the way when two Iron Chefs come to blows.
Josh: And originality.
Chico: And so the rivalry is settled... for now. *eyebrows*
Josh: Quit acting all mysterious, Chairman Chico.
Joe: There's no way you let the rivalry die here
Chico: Okay, back to fun face. Time for a couple of quick reviews...the first is BBC America's newest import: Britain's Missing Top Model, which features beautiful ladies... with disabilities.
Josh: I'll sit this out. I don't want to make fun of disabled people, and I did not get a chance to see the show itself.
Gordon: I don't have BBC America, Chico, so this review is all yours.
Chico: Right on. So the show works. The story telling is top notch. The challenge is definitely there to do right by the players and for the players to basically rise above themselves. you find yourself rooting for ... well, anyone.
Josh: It's a great concept.
Chico: So it's not so much a competition to have a competition, but at the same time, I don't feel like I'm being lectured about the typical ideal of beauty. On the flip side, I really would've liked to see something other than "Top Model with a missing limb." Because when you take out the players... that's all there is. Still, it's different in its approach, so I'm going to go with a B on this one. It adds something new in that that players are new. Not so much the format.

	BRITAIN'S MISSING TOP MODEL - BBC America
	GORDON	CHICO	JOE	JOSH	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	NO GRADE	B	NO GRADE	NO GRADE	B

Joe: I don't think it has to really be anything other that "Top Model" clone to be successful.
Chico: So you think the show works, then.
Joe: Sounds like it's more of a "Hey, they can do it, too. Take a look." approach
Chico: That makes sense.
Joe: Not everything has to reinvent the wheel, you know
Chico: I know. Nor does everything have to.
Gordon: Now let's talk about this other show - Launch My Line.
Josh: Hold on...(grabs barf bucket)...Ready
Chico: Do we have to?
Gordon: Yes, we do.
Chico: I can sum up this entire show with one line. "I remember this show back when it was called Project Runway."
Gordon: Now Launch My Line is about...yes, launching a line. Shocker. These are people who don't have the same fashion experience, but who claim to be just as talented. But they are all assigned their own consultant. Let's see if Chico can give us anything good.
Chico: The good... the format works. Because the formats that preceded it worked. And this is just another attempt by Bravo to throw something to the wall in response to losing Project Runway and seeing if it sticks.
Gordon: This was not as cloying as The Fashion Show
Josh: That was painfully obvious.
Chico: Didn't really do it for me.
Josh: To me, here's what was wrong with it. First: The Hosts: D-squared. Incredibly annoying
Chico: Thank you! Gosh, there's overbearing, and then there's a limit.
Josh: Yes. And their lines seem FORCED. Especially their Italian catch-phrase, which is problem number TWO
Gordon: I agree with Josh on that. It's not only forced, but lifeless. They are not good hosts. We need a 'fierce' host, yes, but fierce also behind the mic. They are more flat than fierce.
Josh: And finally, the contestants I could care less about. It's not a who's who but a who cares list.
Chico: The whole package just seemed two dimensional to me.
Josh: I wouldn't even give it two dimensions.
Gordon: I didnt mind the contestants as much. I did like the catch of them using experts to launch their line. But you actually know what would work better for me?
Chico: Something original, maybe?
Gordon: If you ran this with the format of Top Chef Masters. Get 18 designers like this, break them up to 6 groups of 3's and have them compete to get in. You'd learn more about the people and the experts.
Chico: ... That would be original, yes. Instead, you get, again, something that looks a lot like... yeah, you see where I'm going with this.
Josh: I wasn't too excited about the TC Masters format. So I doubt it would help LML in anyway.
Gordon: The other major drawback with this show isn't the contestants, but their lack of experience. At least with Project Runway, you had the designers able to take us into their world and explain why things were hard or easy. These contestants don't do that. Now Chico.
Chico: Yes, Gordon.
Gordon: Your sister, who is a fashion fan (much more than any of us), took us to task for not realizing Project Runway 6's greatness. What did she think about this?
Chico: I don't even think she watched it.

	LAUNCH MY LINE - Bravo
	GORDON	CHICO	JOE	JOSH	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	D-	F	NO GRADE	EPIC FAIL	F

Gordon: After episode 1, that will make 2 of us. D-.
Josh: This was torture to watch. The Countdown clock should already be at ZERO for this series. And I don't hand this grade out lightly....EPIC FAIL!
Chico: Here's something Italian... Effe.
Gordon: I can't fail this. The competition itself does work. The judges weren't terrible. But it did make The Fashion Show look good, and that's bad within itself.
Chico: Interestingly enough, I didn't hear Bravo say Boo about this the day after, so what does that tell you?
Josh: No faith in the series at all.
Chico: Not so much that but no ratings. Usually, they'll say something like "We launched "My Line" to an audience of suchandsuchaviewership.
Joe: Hmmm
Chico: Didn't see it yet. What does that tell you?
Joe: I think Bravo got the results from The Sniff Test back and didn't like what they saw.
Josh: Or what they smelled.
Gordon: Do you like what the hamsters did? They have their own designer show.
Josh: What did they do this week?
Gordon: Fluffy's outfit is made of feathers. Cheeseball's outfit is made of Cheetos.
Josh: I see one actually looks like they're wearing a Santino original.
Gordon: KenJen has the Santino original.
Josh: Must've been the "whatever's in the cage" challenge.
Chico: I hate to think what they did with the hamster.... leavings.
Gordon: Gordon Jr.'s outfit is made of...cat hair? Oh no. Eve isn't going to be too happy about this.
Chico: Ouch.
Gordon: Aaaand there's the Chairman with the leavings. He calls it the poo poo platter.
Chico: Oy. Well, before we get crazy with the woodchips, let's get crazy with the news.
Gordon: Roll that Beautiful Brain Footage.

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Josh: Another thing I want to ask Doug if I ever meet him...Where does he get the music? (It was from a TV station I watched when I was a younger man)
Joe: I'd ask "Who does your hair?"
Chico: That was the WPVI Move Closer to your World package.
Josh: It was also the theme to WPXI's news at 5, 6 and the nightbeat at 11.
Chico: As for the hair... I can't answer that. Gordon?
Gordon: I have a stylist for my hair. I do my own datebook, thank you.
Chico: Nice

Saturday December 12 has something Chico's going to want to see - American Ninja Warrior!

Chico: Nice
Josh: Yeeeees. Finally a break from all the Ninja Warrior/Sasuke repeats!
Joe: I would hope so. Sasuke 24 airs in Japan New Year's Day, so the US needs to catch up sooner or later.
Josh: I think they are up to Sasuke 22
Chico: You don't have to watch them every morning, do you? =p
Josh: Not in the mornings. I work during that time.
Chico: They just ... JUST aired Sasuke 23
Joe: Sasuke 24, 1/1/2010 Sportsman No.1 1/7
Chico: Thank you, Monster9
Joe: 23 was in September.
Chico: Now Gordon, I have something for you as well...

Next Sunday... the finale of Survivor

Josh: Should be quite....Interesting *Strikes a pose a la Wilmer Valderama*
Chico: You want me to bully with the baseball bat?
Gordon: Yes (hands over the bat)
Josh: Let's bully
Chico: This week, it's all hosts, all the time.

We have a host for Our Little Genius. Stop at... Kevin Pollak.

Joe: Stop at a Meh
Josh: That's big bucks right there. Pollak has a little experience, plus comics are doing well as hosts. Before Dave Foley showed us what HE could do.
Chico: We all remember him from Celebrity Poker Showdown.
Josh: Season 1 and only season 1
Gordon: The show for me is a Meh. We've seen this before.
Chico: The show still is basically 5th Grader meets Set for Life. I'll give it a "meh". If only because I'm going to be the one writing it up.
Josh: I'll give it a shot. At least the kids don't have to make an embarrassing admission.
Joe: You're far more charitable to this show than I am
Chico: As for much more seasoned hosts...

The Bob Eubanks ep of TNG has an airdate. Mark your calendars (and I know Gordon will mark it for you) for January 7.

Josh: I'm excited about that.
Chico: That's gonna be pretty cool.
Gordon: That should be a fun show.
Joe: Color me mild
Chico: Bob will host, while Carnie and her family will be contestants.
Joe: Okay, now I'm more interested
Chico: I'm ready to see more of that classic delivery.
Josh: Bob is still the Master of newlywed game, And I actually like Carnie as a host. It's hard not to like Carnie as a host. She's really grown into the role. She's come a long way. She still has a long way to go... but she's taking a masterclass, so... there you go.
Gordon: Here's what I don't like about the episode. Having the special bout Carnie and her family clearly paves the way to the Carnie Wilson reality series.
Josh: Yah....I'm not really looking forward to that.
Gordon: I don't know if this is going to be 30 minutes of playing the game or 30 minutes of infomercial.
Chico: We can all hope, right?
Josh: With Eubanks, I bet it's game. I'll put 200 on the high road of game
Chico: I'll go with you on that action, Josh.
Gordon: We can hope. We can also hope for no stupidity this week, but we know that's not going to happen.
Chico: ... no.
Joe: That's as inevitable as the tides.

Are YOU Smarter than Flight Time and Big Easy, who decide to fly on Franz Air.

Gordon: Franz Air...ball.
Josh: Gosh....I'm trying to think of a good Harlem Globetrotters joke. I just can't do it.
Chico: ... sorry, but I think Joe still has the lead on "Franz" jokes.
Joe: The Globetrotters' performance was a real Lemon (Meadowlark Lemon, that is)
Josh: As sparse as Curley Neal's head. (I'm so sorry)
Chico: That wasn't a Globetrotter move... that was a General move.
Joe: The Globetrotters didn't realized they transformed into losers (another Kafkaism)
Chico: I win. :-)
Josh: "It's his basement, It's His Rules, It's His Game Show" Of course he wins
Gordon: All of your jokes are quite putrid. (Hands out Dunce Caps to everyone)
Josh: I'll keep mine on, Gordon.
Gordon: As for the Haterade - besides these bad jokes...
Chico: *raspberries*
Josh: 99 bottles of haterade on the wall...99 bottles of haterade...
Gordon: Keep that theme, Josh, we'll be going back to it.
Josh: Ok

Adam Lambert is now off ABC's schedule. Completely. ABC cancels 2 more Adam Lambert appearances, citing the 'FCC' and 'Advertisers'. Can we say bitter network?

Josh: Can we say Stupid Moves by Lambert?
Gordon: I dont think it's that stupid. Someone New Year's Eve show will gladly pick him up. Most certainly FOX.
Chico: But I see where you're going with this. It makes sense. ABC is absolutely a-scared of the FCC and any special interest group that gets absolutely horny over the word "boycott". Fox, on the other hand, is a fit because, well, they're Fox.
Josh: And FOX made Lambert.
Chico: a) He cut his jib there, and 2) they're known for giving folks the broadcast version of the middle finger
Gordon: Exactly. So now Josh...(Gives Josh a bottle of Haterade)
Josh: Take one down and pass it around....
Gordon: Because I have another bottle of Haterade. Josh, the lyrics, please...
Josh: And now we have 98 bottles of Haterade on the wall.
Gordon: And a Zombie



Chico: Ew.
Josh: AHHHH!
Gordon: I didn't know we had Zombies in the song.
Josh: *drops the bottle and hides behind Joe*
Chico: Christmas night of the living dead.

The Pickup Artist got enough ratings to get a season 2. It did NOT get enough to warrant a season 3, so it's been Zombied.

Josh: I'm personally glad.
Chico: Agreed. Also, add the jenkins effect.
Josh: I'm afraid....I don't wanna see a zombie.
Gordon: Hey Josh! (Gives Josh another bottle of Haterade)
Josh: 98 bottles of haterade on the wall...98 bottles of haterade...take one down and pass it around, and there's 97 bottles of haterade on the wall.
Gordon: And this one...aww...a Love Zombie.
Chico: Awww.
Josh: NOOOO! *hides again*
Joe: ewwwwwwwwww
Chico: Corpse bride.

Remember Byron Velvick, Mary Delgado and their on-again, off-again relationship? It's now off again, permanently.

Chico: Well, let's see. He's old. She's bat-guano insane. They met on the Bachelor. This was only an inevitability.
Gordon: I'm sure Chico must be completely crushed about this.
Chico: Totally.
Joe: Is that why you have that orange soft drink with you?
Chico: Yep. *sips* Let's get loaded.
Josh: *HIC* Oop, scuse me!

When X-Factor comes to the US, it may be pitched as an internet-only pay-per-view event... taking place in Vegas.

Gordon: Good luck with that. Really.
Joe: Okay, what part about that sounds like a good thing?
Gordon: Umm...none of it?
Josh: Two words....Big Mistake
Chico: Oh yeah
Joe: Internet PPV? Are you nuts?
Chico: You're going to go nowhere unless you have the TV model to go with it.
Joe: I'd flush this so hard, it'd break the plumbing
Gordon: I think Simon Cowell is over estimating the power of the 'net here. I'm not going to pay $9.95 a month to watch American Idol on-line when I can see it for free.
Josh: It needs to be on Telly. You need to get it to a mass audience.
Chico: Agreed. And Agreed.
Joe: Even TV PPV or Video on Demand is better than this idea
Gordon: Pro wrestling has the right idea. You advertise the decent matches on tv and put the good ones on Pay Per View. There's no way, especially in this economy, that you're going to get people to pay to watch this.
Josh: Nope.
Chico: There you go.
Josh: Plus I can see this over-inflated to the price of a boxing match by the time the final comes round.
Gordon: I'll make Chico watch this and get the results for free, thank you.
Chico: No thank you.
Josh: LOL
Chico: ... Only because this is NEVER... EVER... going to fly.
Joe: LOL
Gordon: Keep in mind I had to get a month Subscription to Playboy TV for Show Us Your Wits. Not that I complained that loudly, but still...
Chico: HA.
Gordon: Now who's up for people you may see on the internet show?
Chico: Right here.
Josh: (Nods)
Chico: *plays "Pimpin' All Over the World"*
Josh: My favorite part of the show.

In this week's Media Ho Report, Carrie Ann Inaba is back from surgery, Simon Cowell tells Eminem he can be a judge on The X Factor, Fantasio Barino gets a show on VH1...

Josh: Simon...Do you realize what Eminem does for a living? There is NO WAY you should put him on live TV!

Regis is recovering from surgery, Nicole Schwerzinger will be a judge on The Sing Off, Joanna Krupa joins PokerStars.net's Million Dollar Challenge...

Josh: Nicole is the lead of the Pussy Cat Dolls....She just got the male 18-26 demo for The Sing off. And Regis, GET BETTER QUICK! :-)
Chico: He'll be fine.

Howie Mandel's New Book launches this week, Adam Jasinski goes to treatment, and Wayne Brady gets to play Carnegie Hall.

Gordon: But none of them are the Ho of the Week.
Josh: Whooooooooooooooooooooooooo Is it?
Gordon: It's Susan Boyle, who's debut album sells a very impressive 700,000 copies.
Josh: *Applause* Brava!
Chico: Nice. That, I believe, is #1 this week.
Gordon: I think so. And those...are your Hoes.
Chico: And it's time to go Global...

And George Hamilton wants out of the jungle for ITV's "I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here."

Josh: I heard the story. He misses his family.
Chico: His reason for quitting: he misses his family and he didn't want to win.
Josh: The first reason I can see. But the second reason...I mean if you're a celeb on one of these shows you don't go on just to go on. You gotta play. And George knew what he was getting into. He should've at least seen the US version.
Gordon: And that's Brainvision. Shut it Down.
Josh: *flicks the switch to "OFF"* Done, sir.
Chico: Thank you sir. Still to come, a world premiere game. But first, we go back to 2005 to see what has the biggest story of 2005 was. This is WLTI, you give us 22 minutes, we'll give you Russell Hantz's enemies list.
Gordon: There's only 22 of them?
Joe: Minutes?
Gordon: I mean enemies on his list
Josh: No. Probably the complete list.
Chico: Probst is on their somewhere.
Gordon: Also add all of the PAs who hid the idols on the island. Yeah, I can see more than 22.
Chico: There you go.

(Brainvision has been brought to you by Kentucky Fried Tarheels. Nothing like the original flavor, when you can lead UNC by 15 at the half and get a nice slow-roasted feeling. Now available in hardwood flavor.)

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