Episode 29.13 - Things That Make Gordon Ill
April 16

(Silence)

Chico: ... Thank you. Welcome back to WLTI, thanks for being a part of our week and allowing our week to be a part of you. What've we got next, G?
Gordon: Next up, we have some Heads or Tails. Because in this world of Jackassery, we need some smart thinking. I'm not sure if we're going to find any this week.
Chico: You say this like it's a surprise.
Gordon: I can always dream. We'll start with this...

With most prime time game shows reaching season or series low this week, the reality game show era is at an end.

Chico: TAILS. Every show is on a downswing.
Gordon: I'll say this - the big era tv show may be at an end - or we just need new creativity. TAILS - but the producers really need to get more creative, because even at the beginning of the season, we knew most of these shows would have issues. Next one?
Chico: Next one...

With names like Steve Harvey, Guy Fieri, and Sherri Shepherd, you need a big name hosting in order to sell a game show.

Gordon: Unfortunately...HEADS. Not with the audience, per se, but with the advertisers and network executives. Or you need someone high on their developmental list. Not that this is a bad thing, mind you. It will get in the eyeballs. But you need the right person and you need a great game show idea.
Chico: I'm going to go with tails. Yes you can have a big name hosting, but make sure the name fits the game and there's no making the name overreach. After all, and I've said this time and again... IT'S THE GAME, STUPID.
Gordon: It's the game, but you need enough of something to get it on the air.
Chico: And you need a lot of something else to get it to stay there. Just saying.
Gordon: Next one...

'Finding Marilyn', the search for the nest Marilyn Monroe, will be a surprise hit.

Chico: Heads. If they gave another season to the Glee Project....
Gordon: Tails. This could be a nominee for worst game show of 2012
Chico: And besides that, Marilyn Monroe is an icon whose legacy will outlive us all.
Gordon: Those people that idolize her don't watch tv. And are 80.
Chico: Or drag queens.
Gordon: Do you think you can get 9 million drag queens to watch the show?
Chico: Depends. How many drag queens are in America today?
Gordon: Depends on how many Metrosexuals who have no clue how to put on makeup you're putting in that category.
Chico: Heh. Next...

AMC's The Pitch will be the surprise game show hit of the spring. Two Madison Ave ad agencies compete for a lucrative promo deal.

Gordon: I don't really consider this a game show per se, more like a slice of life. I do like the show, but I don't think people will 'get it', so Tails.
Chico: TAILS. It lacks the whole Mad Men appeal. I know that's what they were going for. It's not going to work.
Gordon: I liked it better than you did, I think. It's smart and hip, but I think a bit too inside baseball. Next one...

The idea to open Miss Universe to transgendered contestants will open up the ratings floodgates.

Chico: TAILS. Nothing's worked. Nothing's GOING to work.
Gordon: Tails, but for a different reason. What's the point of a Miss Universe Pageant, if I was in...oh let's say...North Carolina?
Chico: It wouldn't really be an issue unless one of ours was in the running. And I mean "all the way in the running", and not just for NC or NYC, but for anywhere in America.
Gordon: They want to see pretty women. Not a pretty guy that looks like a woman. I personally don't have a problem with it, but I'm sure that's going to hit a raw nerve somewhere and people will leave in droves. ESPECIALLY if that person has a chance to win.
Chico: I doubt they'll know until after the fact, especially if they keep it under wraps.
Gordon: Oh no. They'll bring it up within 5 minutes of the show airing.
Chico: If they were smart, they wouldn't.
GordonL It's not about being smart. It's about creating a storyline that will make people tune in. That's as huge of a storyline as you're going to get.
Chico: True. But that's just me. Last one...

Splitting coverage of American Ninja Warrior between G4 and NBC.

Gordon: Heads. It worked last time and NBC needs all the help they can get.
Chico: Heads. so does G4. NBC more so, though.
Gordon: NBC has nothing. Nada. El Zippo. They can use it badly.
Chico: They do have The Voice... and that's it, sadly. Until AGT bows and things get real.
Gordon: They need more than that. Maybe they'll find it in our next segment, which will come to you after this!
Chico: See you soon!

(Brought to you by Top Piercer. Sure we've seen tattoo artists, but we want to see the best ear pieces. Samu hosts)

Chico: That's a hole new game right there.
Gordon: I don't know what's more painful - the idea of the show or the last pun.
Chico: Yes. Anyway, since we don't have enough money for that many piercings, we gotta spend our money elsewhere. So we present these six with the question... Are You Buying What They're Selling? First up, something from Tuesday that Jason Block showed us...

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003ZRQPTA/ref=ox_ya_os_product 
The new Let's Make a Deal home game.

Chico: It's just like previous entries, only this one has Wayne Brady on the cover.
Gordon: It's $5.50. I'd buy it for that
Chico: Me too. And I'd have enough for the new Wheel of Fortune 3rd Edition to boot. Game night is SOLVED.
Gordon: Nice. Next one...

http://www.cafepress.com/+cliffhangers_white_tshirt,99352894
I think you'd like this one - a Cliffhangers T-shirt for $30.

Chico: Ah. I wouldn't buy it. Simply because it's just... simple. Nothing real interesting about it.
Gordon: Well that's $30, so I wouldn't spend $30 on it, but I would spend $11 on this:

http://www.cafepress.com/+one_dollar_bob_journal,29764693

Chico: For when you need to relearn how to write. And because Gordon's a southpaw, that'll take a lot of relearning. :-)
Gordon: Hardy har har. Next one?
Chico: Next one...

http://www.bravotv.com/thetour 
It's a ticket to see Top Chef: The Tour!

Gordon: I've already gone to one of those. Those are a blast.
Chico: It starts in May 17 at Charlotte, which is 4 hours from me, and May 19 in Staten Island, which is one hour from you.
Gordon: The best part is it's free - and I'd hit the one in NYC on May 20th.
Chico: There's a plan. So well worth the price of admission... zero. That's a BUY from both of us. Next?
Gordon: Next one...and this is some nostalgia here...

http://www.cafepress.com/+magnet,349148667
A Wheel of Fortune Refrigerator Magnet!

Chico: Amazingly enough, not in the Wheel goodie bag. But I did get the cards... I did get the pens. I did get the blinkie pin.
Gordon: Are you going to add it in there?
Chico: I'll put it on the Kegerator. Because this is the Old School Wheel.
Gordon: Me too. Another pair of buys. next one?
Chico: Next...

While we're on Wheel, how about... the $7 million Merv Griffin Estate? Or roughly the cost of buying around 28,000 vowels.

Gordon: If I had the 7 mil, I would buy it
Chico: So would I. If I hit the Mega Millions two weekends ago.
Gordon: Waa Waaa...
Chico: Oh well.
Gordon: Last one...Oh Chico...
Chico: Yes, Gordon
Gordon: You know we traditionally gifts her fro your faaaaaaavorite tv show, The Bachelor
Chico: Yes. Sadly.
Gordon: Now I do have a Bachelor Pad Teddy bear, but that would be too easy.
Chico: Of course.
Gordon: So You KNOW you would absolutely LOVE to have...

http://www.jackpotjoy.com/game/super-slot-red-or-black/red-or-black-slot/demo?gameType=SLOT
A Red or Black Slot Machine

Chico: Wow. This isn't even good enough to be on Facebook.
Gordon: This would be from Jackpot Joy, which apparently is legal because its not on US soil.
Chico: Go figure. As for the Red or Black mechanic. You choose it before the spin, and if you get a winning line, the payout is multiplied. Other than that.... not much to write home about.
Gordon: And just in case you're not content with one bad game show turned into a slot machine, here's annother one with Million Dollar money drop

http://www.jackpotjoy.com/game/money-drop/money-drop/demo

Gordon: You say you want ANOTHER bad game show? How about PLay Your Cards Right?

http://www.jackpotjoy.com/game/play-your-cards-right/play-your-cards-right/demo

Chico: Now this just sucks. What it is... it's basically a playout of the Money. BUT instead of going on every time you make a mistake, your game just...ends.
Gordon: I thought you said 'I want another one'. What about Deal or No Deal?

http://www.jackpotjoy.com/game/slot-dond/deal-or-no-deal-slot/demo?gameType=SLOT

Chico: For the love of god, stop.
Gordon: I take that as a no?
Chico: No. At all. NEVER.
Gordon: Just in case you wanted more... X-Factor:

http://www.jackpotjoy.com/game/slot-x-factor/steps-to-stardom/demo?gameType=SLOT 

Chico: And now it's just sad.
Gordon: Golden Balls:

http://www.jackpotjoy.com/game/slot-goldenballs/golden-balls-slot/demo?gameType=SLOT

Chico: You just wanted to say "Golden Balls" on this show.
Gordon: Heh. And finally...Family Fortune.

http://www.jackpotjoy.com/game/slot-family-fortunes/family-fortunes/demo?gameType=SLOT

Gordon: I'll come up with more unless you set us to break.
Chico: Break it is then! Speed Round on the other side.

(Brought to you by Who's Hot and Who's Scott, the new game show where you have to figure out who out of a panel of hot leggy models is sporting some extra hardware. Gordon Pepper hosts)

Gordon: People will watch this.
Chico: And GSN will buy this.
Gordon: It would be a better buy than what they've been buying lately, and we'd only ask a fraction of the 7 mil they gave ABC
Chico: We'll make a call.
Gordon: While Chico does that, the speed round starts...now! Idol: Will we see Jessica the week after the judges save?
Chico: Yes. We won't see Hollie, though.
Gordon: I don't think we'll see Hollie either. Who won't we see on Survivor?
Chico: Troyzan, barring an immunity win
Gordon: Troyzan or Leif
Chico: If not Troyzan, then Leif. Amazing Race. Who's out?
Gordon: Im going to say Team Faux Teachers gets ganged up on and sent home
Chico: Yeah, they're not teachers, by the way. They're COPS. :-) Taken directly from the episode.
Gordon: They're going to be mulch. This week is the striking contestants go home episode of The Biggest Loser. Will Conda be one of the expelled?
Chico: How can I say this... yeah.
Gordon: Im hoping so. ANy email?
Chico: Nope. But they can change that. Just drop a line at WLTI@gameshownewsnet.com OR hit us up on Facebook, Twitter, and the YouTube. But we're on Twitter all the time, so ... yeah, talk to us.
Gordon: Next week: It's the week of expulsions
Chico: Hammer down. Thanks to... no one in particular. Because, well... just you and me, G.
Gordon: True. So that's what we got next week. For this week, this is Gordon saying Game Over and Spread the Love!