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You either loved it or hated it growing up, but now in the 21st Century, the scourge of gym class has come back for a brand new season of red balls flying and lame ballers dying!

Follow the road to the championship in our Extreme Dodgeball Skybox!

Recaps by Gordon "Red Hot" Pepper, GSNN


FACT FILE:
Host: Bil Dwyer, Zach Selwyn, Mary Strong
Creator: Rich Cronin
EP: Mark Cronin, James Rowley
Packager: Mindless Entertainment, GSN Originals
Airs: Thursdays at 10:00pm ET on GSN


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Week 7 - December 2

Welcome to another week of Dodgeball. After a week of Thanksgiving Break, the Ballers are back, and they want to stuff something else besides turkey.

Match #1 - Delta Force (3-3) Vs. Ink Inc. (3-3)

Delta Force
Paul 'Rambo' Green - A former player in the NFL - 6'3, 215, 60 MPH - and he can turn his eyeballs inside out. Plus he has 22 kills and 3 catches.
Bobby Roe - A former college baseball player. 6'5", 235, 48MPH. He's another big boy, with 16 kills and 2 catches..
Geoff Meed - A former professional jujitsu martial artist. 5'10", 177, 44 MPH, Not as scary as Green with only 2 kills and 1 catch - but still scary.
Lisa Marshall - She's not 6', but at 5'10, 170 and 36MPH, she's another built player. She has 4 kills and 1 catch.
Linda Overheu - 5'9", 130, 38MPH. At last, someone who I can't accuse of bulking up - but she has 3 kills.

Ink Inc
Ben 'Psycho' Toth - 5'11", 150, 48 MPH - He's the captain, and he has 10 Kills and 5 catches so far
Strati Hovartez - 6'0", 180, 59MPH - Leads the team with 13 kills (5 game winners) while getting 6 catches - maybe a rookie of the year candidate?
Shaun 'Hitman' Hauser - 5'1"0, 215, 45MPH - He is up to 12 kills, 4 of those game-winners.
Kim Estrada - 5'9". 125. 37MPH - She was on the Curves of Steel. She's no longer there, but she does have... curves - and 3 kill and 5 catches. Heh heh heh...
'Scary' Kari Richardson - 5'8", 135, 31 MPH - She finally gets on the board with 3 catches. Still scary, though.

Round 1 - Hovartez and Richardson go out quickly, and Toth and Hauser's throw is caught. Estrada catches a shot which brings Hovartez back, but Hovartez gets tagged and Estrada is again on the clock. She survives the 20 seconds and the Inksters regenerate. After an exchange of catches, there are 5 Inksters Vs. 1 Delta (Green). He doesn't survive the 20 seconds as Hovartez gets in the successful suicide kill - which kills off the Force (Inksters lead, 1-0).

Round 2 - Toth foot faults out and Hovartez is out - but they are both back in as Estrada and Hauser pick up catches. They pick off Deltas until Marshall is left - but she regens the team and it's the Inksters that get picked off. Estrada, the last Inkster, is finally gets eliminated as her throw is caught by Roe as the Force tie up the match (1-1).

Round 3 - The forces want to send 'the tattooed freaks back to the music store to pick up some Limp Biscuit CDs', and the DMW's are Toth and Marshall. Hauser and Green are both out first, the people who are guarding Marshall get picked off one by one until Marshall is left. Can she regen the team? Yes she can, and it's back to 5 on 5. Hauser and Hovartez are gone, and Richardson takes one in the pierced septum. Ouch. She is out next, and Estrada gets out on a delay of game. Toth is left - now can he regen the team? Yes he can, and it's 5 on 5 all over again. Hauser takes out Roe, Hovartez catches a shot from Green, but both Inkster ladies are out. Hauser takes off the last man from Delta Force, and that leaves Marshall completely open for a Hauser shot, which is the winner. (Ink Inc wins, 2-1). The Inksters go back over .500, while the Force go back under .500.

Next up - the Response need the win to force the CPA's win or there will be a tie for first. The sharks need the win so they can stay in the playoff hunt. Which team wants it more?

Match #2 - Armed Response (4-2) Vs. Reef Sharks (2-4)

Armed Response -
David Benedetto - 48MPH - 24 Kills, 0 Catches, Still a Swamp Donkey
Kel Watrin - 61 MPH - Fastest in the league, and deadly with 23 kills (4 game winners) and 4 catches
David Rice - 44 MPH - 12 Kills, 4 Catches, and finally has woken up
Nicole Zingale - 38 MPH - 1 Kill, 3 Catches. But hey she's better than...
Tanya Fenderbosch - 34MPH - 0 Kills, 1 Catch.

Reef Sharks -
Mark Pontius - He's been sharking around with 12 kills and 3 catches with a 50 mph shot.
Mark Long - He's 6'3", 205 and throws up to 50 mph. He had 22 kills - 2 of them for game winners this season.
Chris Bullis - Another new guy (6'2", 200, 43 MPH) - with 11 kills and 5 catches to boot.
Amy Wiseman - 5'6", 125, 36 MPH She has 12 kills as well with Pontius. Sweet.
Melanie Thomas - 5'4", 125, 26 MPH - 1 catch, 1 regen, 1 surfboard.

Round 1 - Long's throw is caught. Pontius and Bullis get hit. Thomas's throw is caught. All looks lost for the Sharks, but Wiseman regens and we are back to even strength. Pontius takes care of all of the Armed Response men and Zingale's throw is caught. All looks lost for the Response - and it is as Pontius nails Fenderbosch. (Sharks lead, 1-0)

Round 2 - Watrin gets bopped by the Big Ball - but comes back in thanks to a Rice catch on Thomas. Wiseman is next, thanks to the Swamp Donkey, and Bullis and Long go out. The Response neglect Pontius and instead aim for the returning Sharks. The strategy fails miserably as the returning Sharks pick off the Response until Zingale is only person remaining. The Sharks don't wait for the Response to regen, as Long tags out Zingale with only one second left on the regen clock. Another strategy by Benedetto turns out to go horribly wrong. (Sharks win, 2-0).

Next up - the league leaders go against each other, which means that the teams in one league will have a shot to move one game closer to their respective leaders.

Match #3 - CPA's (6-1) Vs. The Bling (5-2)

Certified Public Assassins -
Tobias McKinney (6'5, 130, 51 MPH) - 12 kills and 5 catches on the season - but only 2 in the last 3 matches.
Michael 'Handsome' Costanza - He's up to 24 kills (and 6 game winners) - but he may want some help from McKinney.
Art 'Artful Dodger' Spigel - 5'9", 175, 46 MPH. He has plenty of help from Spigel, who has 11 kills, 3 catches and 3 regens
Mandy Sommers - Last year, the 5'5" player had 12 catches. This year - 1. She has to step it up.
Natasha Pospich - She's 5'7", 135 and a former tennis pro, but she has no kills, 1 catch, and a wrist injury

The Bling -
Portis Hershey - 48MPH - The Chinchilla has been a little crazy with 2 Catches, 9 Kills, and one regen.
Frank Frisoli - 59MPH - He's been the main guy with 22 Kills, 3 Game Winners and 2 catches
Adam Ullberg - 50MPH - He's been the true sidekick with 13 Kills, 3 Catches.
Mia Parlor - 7 Kills, 1 Catch, 1 regeneration - She calls herself the female Kobe Bryant...
Alvina Carroll - 33 MPH ...which makes her the female Dennis Rodman, though she does have 1 kill and 3 catches.

Round 1 - Could this be a preview of the championship match? Bling is 2-0 against the Classic Division, and they are looking to extend it to 3-0. It looks like it early as Costanza is out, but Ullberg and Hershey gets taken out next. McKinney is out, Sommers foot faults out and Spigel takes out Frisoli. Caroll is out, but she regens the team and it's now Bling vs. Spigel and Pospich. Frisoli catches Spigel's throw, and then tags Pospich as the Blingers take first blood (Bling leads, 1-0).

Round 2 - Spigel calls Frisoli a Communist - and a Republican - and he wants Frisoli to be gone first. It is Costanza who is gone first, and Sommers and Parlor is next. Frisoli the Communist takes down McKinney, and Spigel and Pospich are left. Spigel evades a suicide kill from Hershey and the CPA's come back. McKinney is tagged out, but Sommers catches two shots - one from Frisoli and the game winner from Ullberg. (Tied, 1-1)

Round 3 - The DMW are Spigel and Carroll. Somers gets another catch and Parlor and Frisoli quickly exit. Hershey is next, and Parler's shot is caught, leaving Carroll all alone. She regens and the returning Blingers take out Pospich and Costanza. McKinney and Sommers is next, and Spigel has to regen for 20 seconds. He does and the CPAS take out Frisoli. McKinney goes out - again and the turning point of the game is when Ulberg catches Costanza's shot. That leaves it to be 5 on 1 with the Blingers against Spigel, and it's only a matter of time until Spigel gets eliminated. (Bling wins, 2-1). They are both tied, but the CPA's flaws are clearly exploited. The team is not nearly as good this year as they were last year, and unless McKinney and Sommers both step it up, they will be making a very quick exit in the playoffs.

We go Beyond the Ball to Portis Hershey, who says that his hair is there because... he's lazy. He gets his strength from his hair - and makes him underestimated, adding that it can help block the ball because if you get hit on the hair, you are not out. interesting strategy...

The next game may not be interesting, but it's crucial to both teams. The Mafia MUST win this game to even have a shot at the Post-Season, while M.A.D. MUST win this game to stay tied for the last playoff spot. Well, this does look like an entry round playoff game...

Match #4 - Barbell Mafia (1-5) Vs. M.A.D. (2-4)

Barbell Mafia -
Jeramy Freeman - 6'0", 290, 47 MPH - He can benchpress a car - but has only benchpressed 2 kills. Yikers.
Tyrone Rush - 6'0", 200, 55 MPH - has 18 kills. He has 2 catches, too.
Alan Grimes - 5'10, 360, 45 MPH - 5 kills, no catches, leads the league in foot faults.
Melissa Coates - The blonde bodybuilder is 5'5", 150 and 37 MPH. She has yet to register a stat this season, though.
Vanessa 'Scorpion' Altman -At 5'9", 155 and a 31 MPH shot, she also has no stats. Where's Amazon Beard when you need her?

Mutually Assured Destruction -
Gary 'Spaz' Davis - 5'11", 165, 43MPH - The captain has 13 kills and 2 catches, not good numbers for a team leader.
Tarone Cathcart - 6'1", 180, 41MPH - has 8 kills and 3 catches - none of which happened after week #1.
Marie Philman - 5'10", 180, 48MPH - She hash 2 kills and 4 catches, but only 1 catch since week #1.
Mark Vannorden - 5'10", 167, 39 MPH - The stats say it all - 8 Kills, 1 Catch, 1 virus
Anna Bartsch - 5'4", 160, 35MPH - she has 6 kills, 2 catches and 2 regenerations. Now if only she can find a real team...

Round 1 - Davis and Philbin both fault out while trying to hit Rush. Freeman catches Vannorden's shot and Rush catches Bartsch. Cathcart regens, but Rush takes out the returning Cathcart, Davis and Vannorden. Philman and Bartsch both get simulthrown out and we see that the Mafia has finally woken up - a little. (Mafia lead, 1-0)

Round 2 - Here comes Rush. Down goes Cathcart. Davis hits Grimes, and Altman's throw is caught, but Philman and Bartsch are both taken off by Grimes and Rush catches a big ball throw by Davis. Rush goes for a suicide-kill....and hits Cathcart for the match-ender. (Mafia win, 2-0).

Tyrone calls himself the Rush Factor, and he is one of the top 3 people. Frisoli and Pontius are the other two people up for player of the week. The results are that... Frisoli gets 100% of the vote. Wha? That's confusing, and so are the standings...

CLASSIC DIVISION
CPA: Certified Public Assassins 5-2
Armed Response 4-3
Ink Inc. 4-3
Barbell Mafia 2-5
EXPANSION DIVISION
Bling 5-2
Delta Force 3-4
Reef Sharks 3-4
MAD: Mutually Assured Destruction 2-5

The Blingers are the only team that has cemented their position in first...or have they? They still have to finish the season against the opposition, and every other position is up for grabs. We'll see in 7 days if things get clearer - or more muddled.

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