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Episode 30.10 - Game
Showlympiad
August 6
 Jason: Not since 1920 actually
Gordon: What about Tug ON It Lightly and quickly.
Chico:: HA!
Jason: Hosted by Fred Willard
Chico:: Goodnight, everybody
Gordon: Welcome back to the show. Assuming we haven't been yanked by
now...wait a sec...
Chico:: What Gordon MEANT to say...
Gordon: ANYWAYS, Chico has some sticks with faces on them.
Jason: Stop Jerking us around and get to the game
Gordon: I'll start with Chico. Chico, you are...Sharon Osbourne.
You text Howard Stern on
Twitter than you are leaving the show, then quickly do a reverse. Coincidentally
enough, AGT has NOT asked you back. What in the world were you thinking?
Chico:: I was thinking about All That and their tight little bottoms. That's enough to get any
woman in a tizzy, I tell you.
Gordon: What about One Direction?
Chico:: Them too. A show with them and All That... Take me now.
Jason: Justin Bieber?
Chico:: No thank you
Gordon: Next one?
Chico:: Next one, Jason, you are Guy Fieri.
Jason: Of course, I am money.
Gordon: Anyone seen a Lamborghini?
Minute to Win It's doing colossal numbers for GSN. With that and
the upcoming Spanish language version, do you see any hope for a revival?
Jason: Of course I do.
Chico:: Like how?
Jason: Look, have you seen anything better reality wise beside AGT on that
channel. I was the best thing they had. I was out there. The show is great to play along with at home
Chico:: It really is.
Jason: People still watch the videos online.
Chico:: They really do. So would they stand to watch on... GSN?
Jason: SURE...if you lower the budget a little. Make the top prize say $100,000 for Supercoin. And then I am back baby! I am off the hook, the king of Flavortown!
Chico:: Nah, I think Gordon Pepper'll host that.
Jason: This was a show that should have been on NBC for a long time. They
burned me out way too quickly.
Gordon: Damn skippy.
Jason: But I wasn't the problem on that show, it was the over use of my
show for any plug in
Chico:: Yep. And yep. Gordon?
Gordon: Next one... Who am I, Chico?
Chico:: Gordon... you're GSN's logo. That's right, you're an abstract collection of nine squares.
... with a new byline returning the "Game Show Network" name.
Cry for help or attempt at refocusing your identity?
Gordon: I think I need to go retro, back to the days where I looked like
a set and not a nightmary from Marcia Brady.
Chico:: So refocus then?
Gordon: No refocus. Or if there is one, it can't be from GSN's past. Only
for their future.
Chico:: Yesterday's gone? Don't stop thinking about tomorrow, something
like that?
Gordon: Something like that. Next one is for Jason.
Chico:: That scares me.
Jason: Uh oh
Gordon: It should scare Jason more. Jason, you are...an Olate Dog.
You haven't been performing for 2
weeks. Restless?
Jason: (flips onto the carpet) Nope. Just practicing
Chico:: Is he gonna flip like that for the next 30 seconds?
Jason: I am actually watching the Olympics to see if I can steal moves
from Gabby Douglas. See...watch this? (does a pawstand)
Chico:: Oooh, NICE!
Jason: And now...(does a one paw pushup) The Olympics gives me rest and inspiration. And now the finish (runs and does a double front flip but misses the landing) OW! I'll perfect that before the show
Chico:: Let's hope so. Gordon, I've got one for you. You are Jodi. AKA evictee #1.
You just saw the coaches come in as players on BB14. Now I have
no doubt would've been more exciting then ANYONE in that house. But seriously...
resentment?
Gordon: Well you know, no one could be more upset than me, but I'm better
than that. I'll get back on BB All-Stars, and I'll win the lot of it. And it'll
be mine, mine, all
mine, you can't have it, let go, not yours, not for you, MINE!
Chico:: No can has?
Gordon: I has when I want to has - CAPICHE?
Chico:: ... Last one?
Gordon: Last one...Chico. You are Michael Phelps.
After you go on your retirement tour with Snoop Lion, any shot of you being a guest judge on the X Factor?
Chico:: Judge? Why be a judge when you can host? I'm just like Ryan Seacrest with twice the empty charisma.
Gordon: Why not? The hosting gig is open
Chico:: And I don't come in Steve Jones flavor blandness.... okay maybe I do, but honestly... it's me or that Lochte dude
and he's a douchebag.
Jason: Dude gets more women than you though.
Chico:: Probably from being a douchebag
Jason: Look...you get his sloppy seconds.
Chico:: ... True
Jason: And if you think you are getting the X Factor Gig...Snoop Lion's
Stash must be REALLY good.
Chico:: Hey, don't laugh. I'm the most decorated Olympian in history.
Gordon: You are. And on that., we end this segment. More happy happy fun
time coming up next.
Chico:: Stay there.
(Brought to you by Olympic Wipeout. You
deserve this medal if you can get poast our obstacles without inadvertantly
trying out for the swimming team.)
 Jason: Wasn't that the Japanese Boxing Team
Chico:: Burn.
Gordon: I was thinking the Chinese Women's Badminton squad
Jason: That too
Chico:: And burn.
Gordon: Welcome back, and it's time for some 5 Good Reasons.
Jason: This is one of our favorite games
Gordon: It is, and it's so fun that Jason goes first.
Jason: Of course I would.
Gordon: Jason...
5 good reasons...why you should NEVER put a game show up
against the Olympics.
Jason: 1. No matter people say, the Olympics are great Television.2. People love their country, and are willing to root for them time
delay or not. 3. Olympians are better "reality stars" than any new game show
contestants or hamsters in a house. 4. It will save the network(s) Millions in lost cost and
production. 5. Finally, It is just not worth it to burn new episodes of a show
against a mammoth 900 pound ratings gorilla. DONE.
Chico:: Alright, Gordon...
Let's Ask America is getting a whole mess of buzz, though it's not being
as widely distributed as it could be. Give us 5 Good things it can do to shoot for a bigger audience
Gordon: #1. Syndication - go after the Excused market. #2. Cable. Most cable stations go national and not regional #3. YouBoob. If this is an internet game, make sure you post it
on the internet. #4. Skype. This is a no-brainer. Advertise with the system. #5. GSN. Yes I said it. It's cheap and easy to produce and it
opens up a new door to a media ganme. GSN should be all over this one.
Chico:: Cheap AND easy.
Gordon: Now Chico
Chico:: Yes Gordon.
The AGT judges INSIST that a non-singer will win America's Got
Talent this year. Give me 5 candidates who can and why they could.
Chico:: 1) Olate Dogs. Cute. And coordinated for the most part. 2) Tom Cotter. Funny 3) Lightwire Theater. They could go where iLuminate didn't. 4) Untouchables... I like their diversity 5) Joe
Castillo... Very different and quite artistic
Gordon: Very nice. Next one?
Jason: I agree with everyone BTW.
Chico:: Okay, Jason...
Jason: Uh oh
Dating series are falling like flies this summer, with the
latest one, 3, only lasting two. Five good reasons as to why, please
Jason: 1. People know the romance isn't real. 2. The Bachelor/Bachelorette does the format better. 3. It's against the Olympics. 4. The women
weren't appealing. 5. And With Dating Shows there is the approaching glut (like music
and other types of reality shows). It wasn't unique enough. DONE.
Gordon: I thought one of the reasons would be that Chico isn't on the
show
Chico:: He said GOOD reasons. =p
Gordon: ...oh. So Chico, you're next
Chico:: Okay
Gordon: and I'm going to be nice. For a change.
Between Willie's Hantz in his Pantz and the Superfans going away
super quickly, this could be the worst summer of gimmicks in a while. Give me 5
gimmicks that we never want to see again.
Chico:: Well, one and two right there. 3) Repeat offenders. Sit on your hands and let some other
peoples have a go. 4) A theme show every episode... Wipeout, I'm talking to you. 5) Player coaches. If you're going to do an all-star season,
then do an all-star season and shut up about it.
Gordon: Can I throw in 'The Saboteur' for good measure?
Jason: JUDGES?
Chico:: *DING!*
Gordon: Ok. Last one, Chico?
Chico:: Finally... Oh Gordon, you were so nice to me just then.
Jason: Uh oh
Gordon: I thought I was.
So give me five good reasons why we should be watching GSN this
fall. For all the crap we gave it over the summer
Gordon: #1. Pyramid. Of course. #2. Beat the Chefs. It will do well despite the glut of other
reality shows that won't. #3. Steve Harvey Family Feuds. For most of you guys, these are
new episodes. #4. Baggage. Sure it's in reruns now, but they are still gold and
someone (GSN or Syndie) will renew it again. And #5. Minute To Win It, which will be followed by the History
of UNC losing to Duke in NCAA College Basketball marathons on Saturday nights.
Chico:: Of course.
Gordon: Even better than Syfy Saturdays.
Chico:: Alright, we've gotta go buy some popcorn to get ready. Speed
Round next.
(Brought to you by Bronze Balls. It's not as rich as Golden
Balls... but it gets the job done.)
Jason: True.
Chico:: Time to run the sprint, G.
Gordon: Speed Round starts...now. Are you watching ANYTHING besides the
Olympics and Big Brother this week?
Jason: Project Runway
Chico:: Great Escape. We've got a week of FIO and Splatalot.
Gordon: So we do have some worthy programming. Do we have any worthy
email?
Chico:: We do. This is from... Sher & KC. Thanks for writing.
VIEWER
MAIL |
“ |
Sher & KC
Are there going to be any new *Are you smarter than a 5th
grader* shows? IF not, then can you or whoever please put this show back in the
lineup of shows?
My daughter and I love this show and we watch it to learn. Its an education for
us and quality time as well. We have bought map books, a dictionary, grammar and
other books to help us. 3 on Sunday isn't enough!!!
Please put this show back on
thank you |
” |
Chico:: I'll take the last part first, Jack. You know, part of the fun of AYSTA5G... you're always learning
something you thought you knew. And the whole educational aspect, not an accident. And that you watch it with your daughter... even better for both
of you. Which makes the next bit hard to say. Cherish the moments with
the show and your daughter.. because that's all you're going to get. Both versions of 5th Grader were cancelled quite a while ago.
Gordon: And that is sad, because it definitely had it's own niche.
Chico:: It really was a charm.
Jason: Again, a show cancelled too early.
Chico:: There is SOME good news. If you're on Facebook and you have the iPhone or iPad, you can
download the Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader & Friends app. It's free, it's fun, I like it.
Gordon: And if it draws the numbers, who knows? It may wind up being
brought back
Chico:: Let's hope. We're going to put up our toys and go to bed. Jason Block,
thanks as always for hanging out.
Jason: Thank you. Always fun to be here.
Chico:: And while we're on Facebook. Oh, we're on Facebook, aren't we?
Jason: Yes we are. And on Twitter @Wltiongsnn
Gordon: And youBoob. and via email at wlti@gameshownewsnet.com
Chico:: Next week, 5 Good Questions continues with three good doors.
Gordon: And that's it for this week. This is Gordon Pepper saying Game
Over and spread the love.
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