Episode 18.7
July 21

Chico: Aaaaaaaaand welcome back. We're joined for this half of the show by the always cheerful Jason Block.
Jason: Hey all!
Gordon: You know Chico, there's been a lot of new shows premiering this week.
Chico: There was.
Jason: There were a ton!
Chico: A couple of them were actually pretty good. A couple more were just "meh." The rest were crap.
Gordon: Jason Block joins us as we give you...MAXIMUM STRENGTH CAPSULE REVIEWS!
Chico: Let's begin at the beginning, shall we?
Gordon: Let's start there. What do we got?
Chico: First up, Fuse takes a page from our book and spreads the love...with "You Rock, Let's Roll".

	YOU ROCK, LET'S ROLL - Fuse
	CHAIRMAN	HATERADE	THE BLOCK	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	D-	D	NO GRADE	D

Jason: Didn't see that one...did I miss much?
Chico: Not really. You remember the dating game?
Jason: Of course.
Gordon: I'm trying to forget it.
Chico: Then you've seen "You Rock, Let's Roll."
Gordon: I'm also trying to forget that.
Chico: Only add on a couple of reality-show challenges and throw in two rookie hosts...
Gordon: ...And you get a mess.
Jason: Nothing new or original then?
Gordon: It's new. It's slightly original. It just doesn't work.
Chico: Oh yeah, and there's a musical twist.
Jason: What's that?
Chico: Midway through the show, one of the three musicians vying for the heart of a civilian is cut. The other two have to sing for their date.
Chico: Or rap... or reggae... or what have you.
Gordon: I was waiting for Ryan Cabrera to come out and host that segment of the show.
Jason: I was JUST going to say...wasn't that something like SCORE?
Chico: Will you settle for an All My Children hottie and the guy from AI6 who orgasmed for his father?
Gordon: ....no.
Jason: ...no.
Chico: How about just the hottie, then?
Gordon: ....she's hot.
Chico: She is.
Gordon: She can't save the show.
Chico: This show, though... should be renamed "You Suck, Get Out." D-...Only because the game works.
Gordon: A D rolls. So we'll give it a D.
Chico: And that averages to.... (ba-LING!) a D.
Gordon: Let's roll on to the next game.
Chico: Next up... Hurl! G4's answer to Major League Eating.

	HURL! - G4
	CHAIRMAN	HATERADE	THE BLOCK	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	F	F	NO GRADE	EPIC FAIL

Jason: I avoided this show on purpose.
Chico: Five guys compete for $1,000. First, they see who can eat the most... Then they compete to see who can keep it down the longest.
Gordon: Which could also accurately be described as a similar competition to see if I could either keep down my lunch or keep my tv on for the duration of the show. Unbeatable Banzuke...the TV torture.
Jason: Wow.
Chico: There is absolutely no reason to watch this show. Remember when we flushed a lot of shows that one time? This is the TV flushing back. F.
Gordon: It did achieve it's purpose. I felt like hurling, too. F.
Chico: This one gets... an EPIC FAIL. (raspberries)
Gordon: Do you see the 'F', Chico?
Chico: I see the "F".
Gordon: You'll be seeing the 'F' a lot more from me this week.
Chico: Oy. But look at it this way, at least it isn't... From G's to Gents... MTV's latest exercise in Pygmalion-like transformation. Take a handful of G's... throw in elementary-school level charm school classes... and watch the train wreck that ensues.

	FROM G'S TO GENTS - MTV
	CHAIRMAN	HATERADE	THE BLOCK	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	F	G  F	F	EPIC FAIL

Jason: This I saw...and I regret every moment of this G--Garbage.
Gordon: Not only is this crap, but it's crap where the 'faux' acting is going to determine a winner. I despise shows like this.
Chico: You know you're in for a bit of a challenge watching if the host thinks it's a challenge hosting. And not challenge in a good way.
Jason: And what was worse....every racial stereotype was on display.
Gordon: And the stereotypes are really irrensponsible television.
Jason: Very bad for MTV and Jamie Foxx who should have known better.
Chico: That's putting it lightly. F.
Gordon: Can I give it a G? I want to give it a G
Jason: I would love to. But F is as low as I go. F
Gordon: Make it a trio, yo, yo, yo, yo. F
Chico: This is another... EPIC FAIL. (raspberries) Watch this show, and the terrorists win.
Gordon: What are we being terrorized with next?
Chico: Next up, and we're throwing this in because of the rabble surrounding the publicity, Project Runway. Bravo's 5th season. Bravo's presumptive final season.

	PROJECT RUNWAY - Bravo
	CHAIRMAN	HATERADE	THE BLOCK	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	NO GRADE	B+	NO GRADE	B+

Jason: Didnt see it. Heard it was fierce.
Chico: Couldn't see it. No Bravo. So Gordon... it's all on you, buddy.
Gordon: It was fierce. Bravo brings out another set of designers to go up against Heidi Klum and company. You know last season, where there was relatively no drama and personality clash? Not this time. Expect plenty of drama - and that's how we like it. B+.
Chico: Gordon likey the drama.
Jason: Nice.
Gordon: Drama = Good
Chico: Does Gordon likey the talent... or absence thereof.. of The Gong Show? Comedy Central resuscitates a game show classic... The Gong Show with Dave Attell...You know something, the first 15 minutes, I thought.... oh god...this is going to be one of THOSE shows...And Andy Dick... Andy Dick didn't help much.

	THE GONG SHOW WITH DAVE ATTELL - Comedy Central
	CHAIRMAN	HATERADE	THE BLOCK	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	C-	F	F	D

Gordon: I was ready to gong everyone involved with this crapterpiece. And if Chuck Barris was watching this, he probably would have sent the giant gorilla arm to yank all of them off the show.
Chico: But then during the second half, you get acts like the stripper coming out of the volcano... the dudes who play their chests like drums... and the guy who plays They Might Be Giants on the water glasses... and you're reminded why the Gong Show was a classic in the first place...That reminds me... Hey Gordon!
Gordon: Hey Chico!
Chico: If you've a date in Constantinople, where will she be waiting?
Gordon: If I was the stripper, it would be in Constantinipple.
Chico: Constantinipple... Yeah. That's... That's it, alright.  *does the "over his head" hand gesture*
Gordon: (waiting for Boos in 5...4....3...)
Jason: BOO!!!!!!!!
Gordon: Thank you. I'll be here all week.
Chico: For those playing along at home, the correct answer is "She'll be waiting in Istanbul." Well, the Gong Show is the Gong Show and no amount of whatever can change that, but I'll dock points for Dave Attell playing it straight too much. C-.
Gordon: The second half of the show didn't salvage this for me. The image of Andy Dick eating a bloody stuffed bunny and Dave Navarro wrestling with midgets would have made me change the channel long before seeing the second half. F for me.
Jason: Sorry, this was F again. No respect for the classic and they went for low class rather than pushing the envelope.
Chico: And the original DIDN'T push the envelope? =p
Gordon: The original pushed the envelope and was funny. This opened the envelope and threw in all of the pornography, which didn't make it as much funny as sophomoric.
Chico: You forgot leaving their dirty fingerprints all over it and sticking the pages together. Now THAT's sophomoric.
Jason: Point taken.
Chico: So this show gets a.. (ba-LING!) D. But afterwards...Reality Bites Back. Ten comedians... Eight reality show spoofs... One winner of 1 ... Million... Dollars.... (give or take $950,000).

	REALITY BITES BACK - Comedy Central
	CHAIRMAN	HATERADE	THE BLOCK	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	A	A	A	A

Jason: Not only was this show the best show this summer...this is one of the top 5 shows THIS YEAR.
Chico: Michael Ian Black is spot on as a the smarmy host. And all the pomposity of reality TV as a whole is shoved back into their faces... with whipped cream and jelly. And of course, it's funny as hell to watch.
Jason: And this is produced by JD Roth, who knows the genre backwards and forwards.
Gordon: We FINALLY get a great show. It punctures the other reality shows to a T, and it does indeed push the envelope, while keeping it funny and not over the top.
Jason: It was brutally funny.
Chico: Gentlemen... I believe this calls for... an A.
Jason: Oh yeah. A.
Gordon: A from me
Chico: ... whatever the opposite of EPIC FAIL is, this is it.
Jason: JD Roth is not going to make any friends, but he doesn't care.
Gordon: JD Roth has had more hits than misses. Chalk this up in the hit column.
Chico: Can't wait for the next episode...And yes, you're not going to make any friends when one of your titles is "Almost American Gladiators."
Jason: This show has no shame. And I love it.
Chico: Funny you should mention no shame, J. You of all people. :)
Gordon: Yean, amazing how that comes into play
Jason: ROFL
Chico: Because our final review... "The Making of a Game Show: Catch 21".

	THE MAKING OF A GAME SHOW: CATCH 21 - GSN
	CHAIRMAN	HATERADE	THE BLOCK	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	B	A	B	B+

Gordon: This coming from Mr. Jason 'Don't Just play, Play to Win' Block, who we get to see on the show. Media Ho.
Chico: It is... the making... wait for it... of a game show... wait for it... called Catch 21."
Jason: Honestly speaking. Even if I wasn't involved, this is a nice package of how a game show gets made. It's precise and does the job. B.
Chico: I want to watch the show now more than ever... But I can't until Monday. Oh well. B.
Gordon: It is a solid show and if you're a newcomer, it's nice to see a show come together. It's clear that they did spend some love on this show.
Jason: And to get some buzz from Merrill Heatter...all the better.
Gordon: And Jason does get some love, but of the 3 contestants shown, he is definitely portrayed as the villain.
Chico: .. Yeah. :-p
Jason: First time for everything, I guess.
Chico: Just don't end up eating the competition. That'd be nasty.
Gordon: So despite Jason 'Hatch' Block on the show, it's a great primer. A.
Chico: And that'll do it for your Capsule reviews... take two and call us in the morning.  Meanwhile, we're going to take a break. When we come back... We're going to Hollywood!!!.... sort of.
Gordon: Hooray for Hollywood...
Jason: That ballyhooey screwy Hollywood

(Brought to you by Fox Sports Net. We're in ur GSNs stealin ur pokerz.)

Jason: At least the World Poker Tour now has a home...now how about High Stakes?
Chico: I think we had a bit of an analog for High Stakes this week on Poker After Dark. And if it becomes the new format... then I'm all for it. The show is called "Poker After Dark: The Cash Game".
Gordon: I like the fact that PAD is brave enough to change their format once in a while.
Chico: Oh yeah. Makes it one of the better poker shows on TV. The fact that it's on every night also doesn't hurt.
Gordon: And our job this morning is to make better TV as we decide where the celebrities should go.
Chico: It's time to play... (randy Jackson) WELCOME TO HOLLYWOOD! (/rj)
Gordon: And here's who we welcome first...

Justin Timberlake

Jason: I would love to see him as a mentor on "So You Think You Can Dance?"
Chico: How awkward... would it be if he was judging on America's Best Dance Crew?
Gordon: I could see him singing on Don't Forget the Lyrics.
Chico: For those who don't know... another judge on ABDC is JC Chasez... who was in a little band with Justin named Nsync.
Gordon: Or maybe a mentor on the new High School Musical show
Chico: Speaking of awkward =p. What, with the Nick Lachey hosting and all. But hey, anything can happen in this crazy world where everyone's talking about a made-for-cable movie...
Gordon: Next one?
Chico: Next up...

Dan Uggla... a sportswriter's wet dream come true.

Jason: Pros v. Joes?
Chico: He could almost pass for Pros vs. Joes... except he's not pro enough and he's certainly not Joe enough. Remember, this is a guy who committed three errors in an All-Star game. Unless you count the Ultimate Fighter... but he'd just get his butt kicked.
Gordon: I know the perfect show that he can go on to atone for his sins. Wipeout.
Jason: There you go!
Gordon: He needs to bounce on the Big Balls...30 times.
Chico: There you go.
Gordon: And toss in Johnathan 'I want to be the closer so I can give the other team the lead' Papelbon with him.
Chico: Sounds like a plan, Stan. Next?
Gordon: Next one...

Brett Favre

Gordon: Brett needs something to do.
Jason: How about "The Moment of Truth."
Chico: Interesting choice... "Did you want to go back to football because you had no other marketable skills?"
Gordon: Now THAT'S someone I can see on Pros Vs, Joes.
Chico: Hosting... except that... again, no other marketable skills.
Jason: yeah
Chico: So he'd be a Pro. Makes sense.
Gordon: What about Celebrity Apprentice?
Chico: How about just about Celebrity ANYTHING?
Jason: Yeah
Gordon: Actually Brett, the message is...do something productive. Stop turning football into a soap opera. Soap operas are good for weekday mornings, not Sunday afternoons.
Chico: Please do something productive...
Jason: Bingo.
Gordon: Next one?
Chico: Next up...

Kim Kardashian is known for having a big ass and a sex tape. Her sisters Khloe and Kourtney are dead behind the eyes... They're playing the Feud this week, but what else can they do?

Jason: Celebrity Big Brother. That way they can show ass and act like one.
Chico: Also known as "a typical day in the Big Brother house"
Jason: Bingo.
Gordon: Put them on the America's Got Talent as the next great stripper act.
Jason: better than the belly dancers?
Gordon: Nothing is better than the belly dancers. Nothing.
Chico: Gong Show judges, y'all... GONG SHOW JUDGES! Imagine the hilarity.
Gordon: They could use their breasts as mallets.
Jason: They would hurt the gong.
Chico: (affected voice) I'd buy THAT for a dollar! (/av) Next?
Gordon: Next one....

Barack Obama

Jason: THERE is a "Moment of Truth" for you.
Chico: Hmm.. perhaps a game that keeps changing....
Jason: Jeopardy? There you go.
Chico: McCain was on Jeopardy!. Why not?
Gordon: Sure. I'd be up to see Obama/McCain/Hilary Clinton Jeopardy 3 way
Jason: Winner takes the election.
Chico: Now that's an election that I can get behind. The categories... Foreign Policy... It's the Economy Stupid...American History...Around Washington, DC..."E"lection Day...E in quotations...And, of course... Potpourri.
Gordon: Last one?
Chico: Last one...

Nick Cannon & Mariah Carey.

Chico: A phrase that's been said three times before...Now THERE's Your Moment of Truth!
Jason: The NEWLYWED GAME.
Gordon: Divorce Court :)
Chico: They'll be on the Newlywed Game... Then on Moment of Truth... THEN on Divorce Court.... and back on the Dating Game. Natural progression.
Gordon: You Rock, Let's Roll! Weeeeeee!!!!
Jason: There you go!
Chico: Let's roll to a break.

(Brought to you by Bachelor 21. Whoever can score a Black Jack first will be the newest Bachelor. Chico Alexander gives the show two thumbs up!)

Chico: "21... PAY ME!" Who's buying the DVD, by the way?
Jason: I will be. The book is fantastic.
Chico: Yeah, but the movie's not really letter-for-letter with the book,
Gordon: It's time to wrap everything up with...the Speed Round!
Chico: Big Brother. Brian's gone. Who follows him?
Jason: Who is the psycho girl?
Gordon: Renny
Jason: Her.
Gordon: I think Steve is about to be hung with his own lasso, as we continue the pick off the people in the wrong alliance rout.
Chico: I'm going to have to go with... Gordon.. because psycho bitches usually last longer than expected. Duel's season 2 finale is Friday. Do we see a season 3?
Jason: Yes.
Gordon: No
Jason: ABC is going to need something.
Gordon: They will - but it won't be that. They don't need something that scores under a 4.0
Chico: It won't be Dance Machine. That's for sure.
Gordon: EEEk! The Game Show Zombie!



Gordon: You like the zombie, don't you?
Jason: Scary!
Chico: It's so deliciously evil! TPIR begins rolling this week. What's the general consensus?
Jason: Until we hear...I dont know.
Chico: I say half can't wait, and the other half think it'll suck until such a time when they find something else that'll make it suck. Because that's how morons operate.
Gordon: I sort of agree. I think the opinions will be extreme one way or the other. We'll have to see what exactly Fremantls does with the show. I will say this, if they screw around with the format, they're done.
Chico: They're not going to screw around with format. No reason to. Then again, no reason not to. This is just going to be one of those wait-and-see moments. We'll follow up next week. Meanwhile.. Catch 21. Who's in?
Jason: I am. Not just because I was on it...it was a good show.
Chico: Of course...
Gordon: I'll watch. If they stick to the Gambit format, they have a winner.
Chico: Looks like they might. Come on GSN... I know you have it in you.
Gordon: Thats a win, isn't it?
Jason: Yes.
Chico: Yes.  Here's one from the voice of Brainvision News... Mr. Doug Morris...

Chico: Approve. :)
Jason: Yes.
Gordon: Agreed.
Chico: Easiest mail I ever read. Next? :)
Gordon: Next one is from Daniel Westfall

Gordon: I agree here. I think that Tattletales would be a great game to bring back - and we have enough dating couples who would do the show.
Chico: What's this kid's name, Daniel Westfall? .... I like your style, Daniel Westfall =p. Tattletales is always a good show to watch, and in this age of IPTV, you can
Jason: Nice one Daniel

Gordon: You sure you like his style now, Chico?
Jason: With Tattletales, yeah. Gong show, not so much.
Chico: Distraction's problem is simple. The game was as simple as it gets... and the gags were as simple as they got... but there wasn't enough variety to sustain it.
Jason: Yeah.

Chico: (Gordon goes postal in five... four... three.... two... one...)
Gordon: That I couldn't disagree with more. Reality shows are definitely game shows. The format is different, but all in all, you're playing a game, and that's the core of the show. AAAAAAAAAH
Jason: I agree with...Gordon. They don't call them reality game competitions for nothing.
Chico: Exactly.
Gordon: Theres a lot of great reality game shows out there. Amazing Race, American Idol, etc. You just have to find the good ones. A reality competition is nothing more than a long-form game show. Contestants even say so themselves. Remember Colleen Haskell from Survivor 1? And the infamous "I feel like I'm on a game show... wait a minute, this IS a game show!" line?
Gordon: Sure do
Chico: QED, dude.
Jason: Yup.
Gordon: Next email?
Chico: Next up, the next episode of our summer long series...

The Daniel Benfield Letter...
EPISODE 3: DEAL OR NO DEAL

Chico: Again... Approve. :)
Gordon: I agree. You needed the pace to become quicker anyways - and there's more risk involved, which should mnake it a gutsier show
Jason: Love the British format
Chico: Hopefully we'll see someone ride it all the way to the end. Not like we'll see that in primetime any time soon. It's less guts and more emotion. I like to see blood once in a while.
Gordon: Next letter is from Bobby McBride. Thanks, Bobby!

Chico: Same chances you'll have a repeat champion on any other day... 1 in nine. Like Larissa Kelly once said... "Everything's so random."
Jason: Pretty much
Gordon: Actually, it's 1 in 3, and I think the answer is yes.
Chico: Chances of winning one game... 1 in three. Chances of winning two in succession... 1 in 3 times 1 in 3.... 1 in 9.
Gordon: Well...no. Because you're saying the chances of a champion (1) to win again. So the chances of one person winning again is 1 in 3, because he's already won once, which takes the first 1 in 3 out of the equation
Chico: Ah. point taken.
Gordon: Now if the question was what's the chances of someone winning 2 straight days, then the answer is 1 in 9, But the chances of a champion repeating is 1 in 3. And this had been Statistics with Haterade.
Chico: Yay!
Gordon: I got one more email.
Chico: Good because we just about have time for one more.
Gordon: This one has been sent to us via our MySpace site, and it's from Matthew. Thanks, Matt!

Chico: That's a good question...
Gordon: Thanks Matthew. The guys name is Bill, and he had to withdraw after the first episode because of food poisoning.
Jason: Thats never good.
Gordon: That's why Darcy returned to the show and then got booted in episode 3
Chico: And now you know the rest of the story. But tomorrow is a chapter that hasn't been written yet... Could be written by you if you want. Show'm how, G.
Gordon: As you see, we had lots of mail this week. if you want to be a part of the masses, send it to wlti@gameshownewsnet.com or to our MySpace site at wltiongsnn
Jason: Please. We love your letters.
Chico: We'd love to hear from ya. Thanks to Jason for hanging out with us...
Jason: Thank you.
Chico: For Gordon and everyone at GSNN, I'm Chico Alexander. Until next week... Game over... and you rock, let's roll...