Episode 26.9 - A Hard Dose of Reality... TV
March 14

Chico: Hey there. I'm Chico Alexander. Usually, we're about fun and games, but every so often, we're faced with a hard sobering dose of reality. Such was the case this week with the events currently unfolding in Japan.
Jason: I am watching the live footage and it is truly horrifying.
Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and sometimes, we all need a hard dose of reality. And then, when we get that, we sometimes wish for a hard dose of reality tv instead.
Chico: We're going to press on with fun and games as usual, because right now, we could use a little normal. But we do so with the people of the Pacific Rim in our minds and hearts.
Gordon: As you've seen with us throughout the years, we've always produced shows during the times of need because we feel that during thes times the most important aspect is a way to get a sense of escapism and a sense of humor.
Chico: ... does that mean we can be funny?
Gordon: well, as funny (or pathetically sad) as we usually are.
Chico: ... Fair enough.
Jason: We will do our best.
Chico: From somewhere in America, the Hard Dose of Reality (TV) edition of WLTI... is... ON!
Gordon: Gordon and Chico here, along with our special guest this week, Mr. Jason Block.
Jason: Thank you. My personal wishes go out to the people of Japan and the Pacific Rim.
Chico: And the fun and games start with someone ELSE getting a cold sobering dose of reality... TV...



Chico: Usually when a judge wants to fall asleep in the middle of a semi-live broadcast, it's a bad thing, as Ashthon Jones learned this the hard way. Randy Jackson being the judge, and the song being "When You Tell Me That You Love Me".
Gordon: And the sad thing is that it's a beautiful song. Big Bored please?

Gordon: The Subject: How NOT to make the Top 10 Tour. You will see that Ashthon violated a number of these rules.
Jason: Yes she did.
Chico: MM-hmm.
Gordon: #1. Sing badly. Enough said here.
Chico: Obviously
Gordon: It was bland, passionless, emotionless and...#2. Forgettable. Sing a song that no one will remember you. That will ensure that no one will vote for you.
Chico: I was so sleepy...
Jason: She was as boring as milquetoast
Chico: And let's face it. That's not the most recognizable Diana Ross song.
Gordon: Let's get to that. #3. Pick a poor song choice. What's wrong with this song?
Jason: Its not a hit.
Chico: Only a few people know of it. And Ashthon was singing for those few instead of a grand and glorious audience.
Gordon: Who are the voting base for this show?
Jason: Aged 13-24 females, usually
Gordon: Are they going to have any sort of connect with the song?
Jason: Nope
Chico: And let's face it... they think Diana Ross is the crazy old chick who got to second base with Li'l Kim.
Jason: Quote File :)
Gordon: If you are going to select Diana Ross, select something we know. Like 'Upside Down'.
Jason: Or 'I'm Coming Out'
Chico: Yep.
Jason: Or 'Endless Love'
Gordon: 'I'm Coming Out', (allow me to be stereotypical here), is a gay anthem, and as many gay people love the show, would have been a great song choice for a connect.
Chico: So she sang a niche song, she sang it to a niche audience, and she sang it poorly.
Jason: Pretty much, and Gordon's right again
Gordon: Endless Love would have been good. A song that no one's heard of? No. #4. Not taking advantage of the interview. What did we learn about Ashthon on her promo reel?
Chico: Nothing.
Jason: Zero
Gordon: Any back story?
Chico: Nope. The only thing we learned is that... she likes Diana Ross. I like Diana Ross. Gordon likes Diana Ross.
Jason: I have ISSUES with Diana Ross LOL
Chico: Granted, but the point here is that there's nothing to stand you apart.
Gordon: Why does she like Diana Ross?
Chico: Nobody knows!
Jason: Um...I still don't know
Chico: Did she listen to her as a kid when everyone else was listening to the Green Day and the Backstreet Boys or something? Did dad meet Diana Ross somewhere? Did SHE meet Diana Ross somewhere?
Gordon: You have the opportunity to tie this into a story to have people vote for you. Ashthon didn't. That's not going to help people give you a reason to vote.
Jason: Can I give an example of how it was done right?
Gordon: Please do.
Jason: Karen Rodriguez showed a home video of her singing Selena in Spanish. PERFECT. This was a perfect a-b connection :)
Chico: You are correct sir. But she was still in the bottom. Not for long, but she was still in the bottom. She was one of those that you really couldn't make a case for bottom.
Gordon: Oh yes you could.
Chico: Or not as good as, say, Ashthon.
Gordon: But it could have been a reason why she stayed on the show. However Karen, though with a very good song choice, violated rule #1 and was not on pitch or in the zone as she was last week. Haley is all over the place and doesn't have a musical base or identity, which is why she dropped there as well.
Jason: Haley was playing dress up. And that yodel made dogs come to the studio :)
Chico: Dude...
Gordon: Yodeling should be banned form the Idol stage.
Chico: Another reason... Haley wasn't really consistent. She doesn't strike me as a Prime Time Player yet. She needs to find a niche and stick to it; otherwise it's Ryan Starr all over again, trying every female singer from the last 20 years and seeing what gels.
Jason: That bad first note by Haley...ouch.
Chico: From "Fallin'" to "Blue" in one week? At least give us an ambiguous pop tune in between.
Gordon: The best way to win idol is to grab a musical genre base, stick with it, get voters, then diversify enough to get people from other genres to vote for you.
Chico: Bingo.
Jason: Like James did this week
Chico: James is set as "the rocker". And right now, he's king of the rockers.
Gordon: And now that we've had 2 weeks of performances, we can categorize. Big Board please?

Gordon: Subject: Type-Casting. Let's go through the names. Scotty McCreery
Jason: COUNTRY
Chico: Country.
Gordon: Lauren Alaina
Jason: COUNTRY
Chico: Also country.
Gordon: James Durbin
Jason: Rock/Pop
Chico: Rock
Gordon: Casey Abrams
Jason: Rock/Pop
Chico: Pop
Gordon: I'd say Alt Pop
Chico: Sure. Split the difference. =p
Gordon: Paul McDonald
Jason: Alternative
Chico: Alt-rock.
Gordon: He's also...Hot Guy With Guitar (TM)
Jason: Not in the sense that I see it
Gordon: What about homely guy with a guitar that chicks think are hot? (TM)
Jason: Win.
Gordon: He's been in a regional band that's very popular in the south. He has a following. He's going to be a dark horse in this competition. Pia Toscano
Jason: Pop
Chico: pop.
Gordon: I would say Adult Contemporary
Jason: And she is diversifying nicely
Chico: You say tomato. :-)
Gordon: AC is VERY different than Pop
Chico: Okay, grown folk pop =p
Gordon: She's catering the older, Clay Aiken vote. There's a lot of that out there to be had. It's a great route to take.
Chico: Oh yeah. A lot of old people watch Idol, too, you know.
Gordon: Haley Reinhart
Chico: Pending.
Jason: AC...badly though
Gordon: I don't know what she is. That's one of the reasons why she's in the bottom 3.
Chico: Hence, "pending".
Gordon: Could be pending the door. Jacob Lusk
Jason: R&B with Gospel
Chico: Yes and yes.
Gordon: Agreed.
Chico: And showtunes. Don't forget showtines.
Gordon: Thia Megia
Chico: Pop. More specifically soft rock ballads.
Jason: Pop/AC
Chico: Tried to deviate from that this week, she's lucky to still be alive.
Gordon: Slow ballady old pop. Her song selections, though challenging, are not current. That's going to cause a disconnect. That also got her eliminated from America's Got Talent. This s a lesson she needs to learn, and quickly, because Pia's also doing the same thing - and better.
Chico: Again, still lucky to be alive.
Jason: Agreed.
Gordon: Stefano Langone
Jason: Pop
Chico: blue-eyed soul.
Jason: That yeah
Chico: If it comes between him and Jacob, ... lots of luck, Stefano.
Gordon: Very pop current. Did a lot to improve his stock, despite that silly techno beat. Karen Rodriguez
Chico: Latin pop.
Jason: Latin pop
Gordon: Latin pop. Again, what do you need to do now? Get a fan base. Selecting a very old song that people outside your genre don't know? Not a good choice here.
Gordon: Hero was a great choice because it's a well known song.
Chico: Yep.
Gordon: and she Spanish-fied it. There's other songs by Selena that would have been better
Chico: "Dreaming of You"?
Gordon: That's the one I was thinking of. Dreaming of You. Huge mega-hit. If she sang that and Spanished it up, that would have been monster.
Chico: I betcha that's coming.
Gordon: Naima Adedapo
Jason: Pop/R&B
Chico: Yeah.
Chico: I was going to say "rhythmic pop"
Gordon: Pop / R&B sounds good. Now let's category it up.

Country: Lauren / Scotty
R&B: Jacob / Naima / (Ashton)
Rock: James / Casey / Paul
Pop: Stefano / Karen / Thia
AC: Pia
Mystery Meat: Haley

Jason: LOL
Gordon: So according to this chart, Pia's going to be safe for a while, just on the fact that she has no natural predators. She needs to increase the AC base and diversify.
Chico: I don't think that's going to be a problem. She's a great singer, she just needs to make good choices.
Jason: Yes.
Gordon: Conversely, R&B, Rock and Pop each has a front-runner and 2 stragglers. I think the upcoming weeks will knock out one of the 2 stragglers in each division.
Jason: You are correct
Chico: Right on.
Gordon: So we have Casey Vs. Paul, Karen Vs. Naima and Haley Vs. Thia
Chico: Haley is in a world of trouble.
Gordon: Expect the next 3 bootees coming from these 6. I'll throw Lauren into that mix as well.
Chico: Karen's going to get a nudge from her bottom placing this week. And Casey... expect sympathy votes.
Jason: Yes. Big time.
Gordon: Karen and Haley will get people voting for them. If I'm Naima (who had to get in as a Wild Card) and Thia, I'm concerned.
Chico: Agreed.
Gordon: Your bottom 3 could be Thia, Lauren and Naima, with Naima going home. And Karen needs to be careful and sing really well also. Of course, singing is the most importanr part of the equation, and the theme is just as important. What's the theme next week, Jason?
Jason: From AmericanIdol.com:

On Wednesday, March 16 8/7c, the Top 12 return to the Idol stage to perform songs from the year they were born. Tune in the following night, Thursday, March 17 8/7c, to the live results show to see performances by Grammy Award-winning, multi-platinum pop superstars The Black Eyed Peas and Idol Season Nine winner Lee DeWyze, as well as to find out who receives enough votes to stay in the competition and who is sent home.

Gordon: Lee DeWho?
Chico: The one with the smaller boobies from last year's final.
Jason: LOL
Chico: So another freeball week. Nothing really challenging YET.
Gordon: Well to be fair, the first few weeks are all about identification. Song choice is going to be really, really important.
Chico: ... Gordon, I have no interest in being fair about this. :-)
Gordon: Well me neither.
Chico: Okay.
Gordon: What about being fair on a deserted island?
Chico: Who said anything about life on an island being fair?



Jason: This was GOOD.
Chico: Another hard dose of reality (TV) goes to Russell Hantz.. who went into the Redemption Duel and lost... and cried like Lebron James. Oh yeah... I went there.
Gordon: I can understand the emotion as a competitor.
Chico: Not necessarily just as a competitor, but as one who basically is known for playing the game as hard as he did, and not winning the big money come finals time.
Gordon: Right. Just like North Carolina going to the NCAA tournament and making the finals twice, and then for your senior year, knocked off by a 15 seed in the first round.
Chico: Don't remind ME! Got to the final four ONCE when I was up there, then I graduate, and they take the whole shoot and match TWICE. I'm a JINX, I TELL YA!
Jason: LOL
Gordon: But back to the storyline. Russell is out, but not before leaving his mark in the game and extricating from Ralph that he has an immunity idol.
Chico: That's called "planting a Russell seed". He did do that... Now let's see if it bears any fruit later.
Gordon: I'm sure it will. Any final thoughts as we see one of the icons of the game depart? I mean we did see some gameplay here, but ther episode was really all about Russell and what he brought to the game.
Jason: He wasn't what we thought he was. (cue Dennis Green)
Gordon: It is too bad, because I would have loved to have seen Russell in his element longer. But he is an icon of the game, along with Sandra Diaz-Twine, Rupert Boneham and Richard Hatch.
Jason: He is an Icon. He will be remembered big time.
Gordon: We also see the other Icon, Boston Rob, make his game stronger as he ejects one of his enemies from his tribe.
Chico: Just two words, Gordon... "Called it." Kristina gets the heave ho... But there was a time when we thought that Phillip was about to get said heave-ho. He's starting to get on EVERYONE's nerves now.
Gordon: I think Philip may be departing from the game soon. But if you're a Richard Hatch fan, good news! You'll get to see him on Sundays on NBC. If you're a David Cassidy fan...notsomuch.



Chico: David's another one who got eliminated and cried like D-Wade.
Gordon: There's no crying in the Board Room!
Jason: You went there
Chico: Oh but yes. He got all upset when he was referred to as "a little man". Well, to be fair, he was a little man in the task of the week.
Gordon: And the task this week was to sell pizza. The women smoked the guys by almost a 2-1 ratio. And that's with the ladies losing 35K from not delivering the winning pizza in a challenge.
Chico: Which should be an easy enough task, especially in NYC.
Jason: That's BAD for the guys
Chico: But you take Rich Hatch... and David Cassidy... and Jose Canseco.
Gordon: Well this is an easy decision here.
Chico: Rich and Jose... they're known for their fight. They are fighters. I mean, look at the stink Rich put up when the IRS demanded Rich's money. I went there again.
Gordon: They lost because of sales, not because of poor management from project manager Hatch. Cassidy only brought in $1,000 from his daughter and was caught taking many smoke breaks.
Chico: So in essence, he was being... a little man.
Gordon: He was. And smoking does stunt your growth, so he's going to remain a little man.
Chico: He's 60, dude. He's about as big as he's ever going to get.
Gordon: Well maybe the elimination then will help put less stress on him.
Chico: Unless Katie brings it up again. And she will.
Gordon: Now an hour earlier in the evening, we had America's Next Great Restaurant. Do we have America's Next great reality show? In a word...no.
Jason: Saw clips of it. Didn't look like anything different
Chico: Nope. It's basically Aspiration-Type Reality Show B. It's like any show Bravo would put on, only there's a restaurant chain at stake.
Jason: With a lot of food network/synergy
Chico: Because Bobby Flay likes his face to be everywhere. The good... it's not like Bobby hasn't hosted a show yet. He knows what he's doing. He's good at it.
Jason: Very
Gordon: From a technical standpoint, the show is clean.
Jason: It looked like what Chico said...a Bravo show on NBC.
Chico: I'm going on a concept standpoint. Conceptually, it's like "The Apprentice". A winner is going to get the backing of the judges/hosts to start the titular element.
Gordon: The first episode felt like a food version of Shark Tank. You had people pitch their idea of a restaurant to a panel, who decided who would advance.
Chico: Okay, I'll give you Shark Tank for episode 1, but it's going to turn into the Apprentice. or 24 Hour Restaurant Battle.
Gordon: I'd say 24 hour restaurant Battle.
Chico: And the EPs... the creators of Top Chef... Project Runway...Dan Cutforth and Jane Lipsitz.
Gordon: The show is fine in itself.
Chico: Oh yeah, the show is just OK right now.
Jason: It just feels cookie cutter
Chico: But I'm watching and waiting for something INTERESTING to happen.
Jason: Nothing
Chico: Exactly. So you have good people with great minds at the forefront, but they're not doing anything yet.
Gordon: It is cookie cutter (pun intended), and although you do need to intro the show and people, it would have been much better to get in a more unique way of separating the wheat from the chafe.
Chico: It's almost like the beginning of Worst Cooks in America, where everyone comes in with a dish and they just rip it apart piece by piece... and we get an HOUR of that this week. Now something needs to happen with what we build on.
Jason: I am looking forward to see who wins, because one of the places it will be at is NY
Chico: And you want to eat there. Of course, the Idol season is young, you just might be paying for GORDON to eat there. And Me, because I may be coming up over the summer. :)
Gordon: Hell's Kitchen is propelled by the attitude of Ramsay.
Chico: Also Masterchef.
Gordon: Flay is, to put it in food terms, mild as toast.
Jason: But that's his style
Gordon: On Food Network, it works. On an NBC show where you're trying to bring in millions of people to see your show, it doesn't.
Chico: It doesn't help matters any that you're going against old heavy-hitter Amazing Race, really old heavy hitters Simpsons and new hitters Secret millionaire.
Gordon: I don't think that's a factor.
Chico: You don't think competition is a factor?
Jason: I don't.
Gordon: I don't either. And unfortunately, this show would have had much more success on Food Network.
Chico: Or Bravo. Could've worked on Bravo.

	AMERICA'S NEXT GREAT RESTURANT NBC - 8p ET Sundays
	GORDON	CHICO	JASON	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	D	D	C-	D

Gordon: Or Bravo. We've seen all of this done before, and better. There could be new original ideas in the works, but unfortunately, the first episode was so lackluster, that you won't be reeling in nearly as much of the first week's audience to watch it. D.
Chico: I want to give it a higher grade on potential, but, and we've said this time and time again... We don't grade on potential. D.
Jason: Been there done that C-
Chico: Ever been to Japan?
Jason: Wanted to. Still do. Hugs and love over there BTW
Chico: Right on. We have a bit of a first in Race history while the racers are in Japan. A team is deemed medically unfit to continue.
Jason: WHOA.
Gordon: And history wouldn't have been made if a team was smart. But as we've said throughout the season, all of these teams have lost for a reason.



Gordon: Hey Jason!
Jason: Yes Gordon!
Gordon: Let's say you and your dad are in the race.
Jason: Ok!
Gordon: Your dad is a very healthy 70+ year old man.
Jason: Yes.
Gordon: And not nearly half the old fart that you are.
Jason: ROFL
Gordon: See I can say this now because I already signed the paperwork and you can't stop me from going with you to Vegas, but I digress :D
Chico: Yeah, that's a propos of nothing.
Jason: ROFL
Gordon: The challenge requires you to search for an item (in this case a not-so-real frog) in a freezing body of water while being pelted with mud. Who's going to take the challenge?
Jason: I am!
Gordon: Why are you taking it?
Jason: I don't want my dad to suffer. My dad is 70+. He could die.
Gordon: Hey Chico!
Chico: Yes Gordon?
Gordon: You're in the medical profession. Please explain what happens when you go into freezing water.
Chico: Hypothermia.
Gordon: Which is?
Chico: Low body temperature.
Gordon: And what happens to you once you hit there?
Chico: You start to freeze to death. Literally.
Jason: And BTW...wasn't the father feeling like crap the country before?
Chico: Yes he was.
Gordon: He was. So instead of the healthy son taking this challenge, they decided to put the sick old guy into a body of freezing water. Am I the only one who sees a problem with this?
Chico: How can I put this... BIG MISTAKE!
Jason: HUGE!
Gordon: But those weren't the only issues we had. In addition, Jaime and Cara rough up a rear view mirror from a native's car, and the Globetrotters get assessed a 30 minute penalty for moving Ron and Christina's stuff.
Chico: Ooh... Now it starts to get nasty.
Jason: Yeah. Not cool
Gordon: Now...why again did we think there'd be good racing this season?
Chico: Because we thought that the Racers would've learned from their mistakes. How wrong were we?
Jason: Pretty much.
Gordon: However, someone who I will not take to task with is Philip Cousin. He is a friend to the site (and he's given us an interview before in our 20 Questions Segment), and we may be getting another interview with him soon. This sets up our new segment on our show, called...

CROSSING OVER

Gordon: This is a segment about game show contestants from one show crossing over to a different show.
Chico: And doing great things.
Jason: Yup :)
Gordon: And with that, I'll let Jason Block give the run-down.
Jason: Sure. Philip Cousin was on Wheel of Fortune this past Thursday and pretty much smoked the competition. In the maingame he picks up $25,600 in cash, which is a GREAT night on it's own.
Chico: Oh yeah.
Jason: But he gets to play the bonus round. He lands on the R in AMERICA"s. He is dealing with a PERSON. With the RSTLNE and his choices of CDMA he gets:

_ _ D _ _ _ A R D

Jason: Guess?
Chico: BODYGUARD?
Jason: Yes.
Chico: And IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII....
Gordon: Thank you, Whitney Alexander.
Chico: Heh.
Jason: Philip nails it and adds 40 Large to his bank, for an All Cash total of $65,600. I think we have a graphic for this
Chico: We do.



Jason: And A standing ovation for Philip!
Gordon: Great Job, Philip. We will try to get an interview with him in the near future.
Jason: So he waits the few months to get the money, but wow. Great stuff.
Chico: When you compare that to someone else who crossed over. Chita "Family Feud/Catch 21" Johnson only made $1000 on 5th Grader... but money is money.
Gordon: And Hamsters are hamsters. They are all wondering when Philip Cousin is coming over.
Jason: Soon :)
Gordon: Cause they...no no no, Philip won a car on The Price is Right on Spelling Bee. He doesn't have any real bees. They wanted honey from his bee farm. Silly hamsters.
Jason: Oh wow. LOL
Chico: I love our Choppler animals.
Gordon: I do. So cute. Roll That Beautiful Brain Footage.

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Thanks, Doug. Okay, Gordon, what's on the calendar?

It's Spring Break! That means time for college kids on The Price is Right for 'Pay The Tuition', a take off on Pay The Rent

Chico: I'm guessing it's the same game, though. Not unlike Golden (Brick) Road from the Halloween show.

If you prefer dopey tired run down reality show concepts, we have Wedding Wars for you from VH1 on Monday. Chico can't wait to cover this show.

Chico: Yeah, I really can. :-)
Gordon: You want to see wedding wars!
Chico: Yeah, bride and groom trying to survive in the jungle. Thank you, but no thank you. But I'll give you this one...Greenlight me!
Jason: (hands Chico the Bat)

Stop me if you've heard this one... People standing on trapdoors competing in challenges for a large cash prize..

Gordon: STOP. Please, stop, I beg of you...

NBC has picked up "Still Standing", a quiz in which 10 people, on trap doors, will compete for as little as $1... or as much as $50,000.

Chico: It's like Russian Roulette meets Deal or No Deal. And it's based on an Israeli format.
Gordon: I'm not having high hopes for this one. If you miss Russian Roulette and Deal or No Deal, maybe. But probably not.
Chico: From a new show to an old show that still has legs. Get my torch.... shaped baseball bat.
Jason: (lights torch bat on Fire and hands it to Chico)

The move to Wednesday is proving profitable for Survivor, as it is reupped for two more editions.

Jason: Duh :)
Chico: Duh indeed.
Jason: And this year has been good. :)
Chico: Oh yeah.
Gordon: And well deserved. It's doing well in it's time slot. First in the fall and holding it's own against Idol in the Winter.
Chico: True.
Jason: Probst is getting some serious cash and producer cred too. BTW, he also live tweets the episode. Very good use of that form
Chico: Very good.
Gordon: Very true. But going back to 'Duh'. We have a lot of Duh this week.
Jason: Oh no.
Chico: *brings out whiteboard*
Gordon: Bring out 2 more.
Chico: *brings out two more whiteboards*
Jason: (helps Chico wheel the boards into place)

Are YOU Smarter than...Richard Hatch, who gets sentenced to another 9 months in jail for failing to refile his 2001 / 2001 taxes - something that put him in jail to begin with.

Jason: Dumb. Ass.
Chico: You'd think he'd be hip to that by now... WRONG.
Gordon: According to an NBC Spokesman, this will have no effect on the finale of the Apprentice - which means we know who won't be in the finals.
Chico: Heh
Jason: Oops. Confession by omission :)
Gordon: But we got more.
Chico: I hope so. You have two more boards.

Are YOU Smarter than...Daniel Haden, who told girlfriend Sarah Patel that he's going out for a few days. He actulally went to tape an episode of 'Take Me Out', which is a DATING show.

Chico: Not unlike "The Dating Game"
Gordon: Sarah saw the show, and needless to say, this happened.



Gordon: Bye bye relationship.
Chico: "I'm Joey Greco with Cheaters."
Jason: You are not kidding me on that one.
Gordon: Ironically, he won the date, so hopefully him and his new woman are living happily ever after.
Chico: ... although after this came out, I doubt it.
Gordon: Me too. One more...

Are YOU Smarter than... Temptation Announcer Rolonda Watts, who got busted for DUI.

Chico: Can I see that torch bat one more time?
Jason: (hands the torch bat back to Chico)
Chico: You guys may want to move out of the way here...
Gordon: (moves wayyyyy over)
Chico: *goes Albert Pujols on the boards* Dumb.... Dumb... DUMB!
Gordon: And now the Whiteboards are smashed AND on fire.
Jason: (puts the whiteboard out with a fire extinguisher). You should have extinguished the torch first
Chico: Okay, I feel better. Moving on.
Gordon: Actually, you can smack this too. (Presents cake with a picture of Marco White on it) All yours.
Chico: *swings for the fences*... Goodbye cake.
Gordon: It's a cake drive deeeeep to left field. It is high...it is far... it is....



Gordon: A ZOMBIE!
Chico: Yo.
Gordon: Hey. They said no pepper games. They said nothing about cake games.

And since we're in that spirit, say bye bye to Last Restaurant Standing - the UK version.

Chico: That foodie show is GOOOOOOOONEGOODBYE.
Jason: Its a food zombie
Gordon: I think it wants Sweet breads.
Jason: Yeah. LOL
Chico: That's cow's brains, by the way.
Jason: Yuck
Chico: Tasty.
Gordon: Are we going to a place that serves them?
Chico: ... possibly.

The Price Is Right has officially landed in the Philippines. And playing "Drew Carey" is a slightly more fit, more brunette, more female Kris Aquino.

Chico: She's every bit like Bob Barker... except in every way possible.
Gordon: I like Kris Aquino. I hope this does well.
Chico: Yes and yes.
Jason: As do I.
Gordon: I also like Media Hoes. Luda Me
Chico: (plays "Pimpin' All Over the World")

In this week's Media Ho Report, Blake Shelton joins 'The Voice', Guy Fieri tours Cleveland, Senators want Ken Jennings to run for office...

Chico: That's not gonna happen.

Bill Engvall plays Kent State, Bob Barker donates 2 million to the Marines, Carrie Ann Inaba is getting married...John Morrison and the WWE Divas will play BrainSurge, Casey Abrams has ulcerative colitis, but is ok now, and Anthony Fedorov is currently in Japan during the earthquakes, but he's ok.

Gordon: But none of them are the ho of the week.
Jason: Who is it?
Gordon: For the first time, the ho is not a he or a she, The ho is an it.
Chico: As in ... an IT. As in a thing.
Gordon: 'It' is Guy Fieri's bright yellow $250,000+ Lamborghini which has been seen all over California. However, it has been seen without Fieri driving it, as it's been stolen.
Jason: He is a car guy. But damn that's some serious cojones lol
Chico: Now I don't know about you, but if I owned a $250,000+ Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder - bright yellow - and it was stolen, I'd be pissed. I'd find the guy, get the torch bat out and say "You have... *whap* ... zero lives remaining."
Gordon: The thief rappelled into the show room that Fieri's car was in, used climbing equipment and made off with the car. No telling whether he accomplished this in 60 seconds or less.
Jason: That's wrong.
Gordon: So you could say that Guy had a 'Minute to Lose it'.
Chico: What, the car or his temper?
Gordon: I'll say both. And those...are your hoes.
Chico: And finally, let's get loaded.

Now we found out about Casey Abrams in the hospital via his Twitter @ CAbramsAI10. Everyone in the Idol 13 gets their own Twitters... and Facebooks.... and My[____]s.

Chico: Also in the loaded...

Red Carpet Run, the online quiz show, is teaming up with Netflix for prizes for the remainder of the season.

Jason: That works
Chico: Find out more about that at RedCarpetRun.tv.
Gordon: And that's BrainVision. Shut it down.
Jason: (Shutting Down)
Chico: Thank you, Jason. Still to come, getting on, and staying on a reality TV show, but first, we put the dancers through the ringer for the next season of Dancing with the Stars.
Jason: fun times :)
Gordon: You're reading WLTI. You give us 22 minutes, and we'll give you 22 game show contestants who have been on more than one show while Chico hasn't been on any yet. Poor little Chico.
Chico: WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!!!!11111
Gordon: Would a piece of battered cake make you feel better?
Chico: ...Yes. *eats the battered cake*

(BrainVision has been brought to you by The Charlie Sheen Emporium. Need Tiger Blood? Got it. Fire-breathing fists with Adonis DNA? Got that. Ricky William's Maui Wowie? Got that too. Proudly endorsed by Jasinsky Couriers.)

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