Episode 26.7 - Race for Your Life, Ryan Seacrest!
February 28

Chico: Hey, gang! I'm Chico Alexander... are you ready to race around the game show world AGAIN? SAY YEAH!
Jason: YES!
Gordon: ...well, this week wasn't exactly an Amazing Race, if you get my drift.
Jason: Not really no
Chico: Nope, but full of twists and turns. And ...



Chico: ... which we will get to..
Gordon: Yes, and we'll see exactly why these people needed second chances.
Jason: You ain't kidding
Chico: Because from somewhere in Australia, mate... WLTI... is... ON!
Gordon: Gordon Pepper here, along with our special guest this week, Mr. Jason Block.
Jason: Glad to be here.
Chico: Good to have you. Meanwhile... to the aforementioned morons. I ask this question... How hard is a) Queensland and Northern Territory Airways Service. ... and b) semaphores?
Jason: A is easy if you know how to play work puzzles.
Chico: B... similarly so. If you like codes and such. Jet & Cord... don't like codes and such.
Gordon: As we saw when they were on their first shot, Jet and Cord are a power-team that don't like to use their brains too much. This wasn't exactly their leg of the race.
Chico: Nope, it was just too many mental issues to get out of the way.
Jason: Not at all.
Chico: And in a Race first, we have an emergency landing that really leveled the playing field before it ever got too advantageous to even matter.
Jason: Which I thought was one of those "only in a Race" moments.
Chico: So it was an interesting leg to say the least, but like you said, G, it is all about minimizing the mistakes that you made the first go-around.
Gordon: At least it shows that there's always an element of luck and that the race itself if guided by those variables. I do like that they played the game straight and didn't make any changes or the producers changing the game up so the people that had the disadvantage benefited by the change of events.
Jason: The game started in Palm Springs in a windfarm where teams had to navigate a field of Paper Airplanes to find the name "QANTAS". If they found it, the first 8 teams would get on the first flight to Australia.
Chico: The other three would get on the last flight, with the team in dead last incurring an automatic U-Turn. That being, the team that came in last would have to perform BOTH sides of the first Detour... Which has yet to happen, as has the first Philimination, because Phil gave the teams the "You're still racing" spiel.
Jason: Evil. :) The semaphore in question was at the first road block. Teams had to enter a shark tank, find a compass, and use the compass to decipher a semaphore code.
Chico: Which would lead them to a commodore and the phrase "I'm between the devil and the deep blue sea."
Gordon: So it looks like Jet and Cord will be safe from Philimination - but they will have to be penalized for their sins.
Jason: Some players have learned from their mistakes...some haven't.
Chico: Yes.
Jason: BTW...strategy question...would you help anyone with ANY puzzle? Because for me...I would tell them NOTHING.
Chico: Because you want to win. You don't want to give anyone any advantage that they may use against you. Because you don't know if they're going to repay the favor.
Jason: Exactly.
Gordon: Not only that, but you can let them suffer and maybe knock them out.
Chico: They could be all like "Yeah, thanks for that."
Gordon: You do NOT want to give them the wrong info though.
Jason: I would.
Gordon: That could set them up to U-Turn you later on down the road.
Jason: Screw everybody, win the million.
Gordon: You only want to stab them if the knife hits the mark. You don't want enemies this early in the game. TAR is still a social game, and you don't want to be ganged up on. Cause if you do, every U-Turn will have your name on it.
Jason: True.
Chico: Which is why the teams helped each other in the beginning. Because it's no harm, no foul right now. But that can and will change, I assure you
Jason: But it was very good television.
Gordon: It's sort of good TV. I prefer good TV with smart teams showing why they deserve to be there vs. dumb teams showing us why they lost to begin with.
Jason: We have both :)
Chico: I'll say this again, the team that wins this season of the Race will be the team that minimizes their mistakes. Suffice it to say, Jet & Cord will not be that team.
Gordon: We don't know that yet, but it's not a good start for them.
Jason: Nope.
Chico: No it is not. But as we've seen before, it's not how you start, but how you finish.
Gordon: It's also not a good time to be in Rob Mariano's camp - or to be against Rob Mariano.
Chico: It's NEVER a good time to be next to Rob Mariano. In ANY capacity.



Jason: I never thought I would say this...but Rob and Russell have been GREAT this year.
Chico: If you play smart, he wants you gone. If you play dumb? He wants you gone. Your best bet is to just do whatever the heck he says and just stay out of the way. Let someone else absorb the target. Enter Matt Elrod... or as I call him, Matt Nimrod.
Jason: LOL
Gordon: Matt made a number of blunders here. Big Bored please?

Gordon: Subject: Reservation for Redemption Island
Chico: Party of one.
Jason: ALL ABOARD TO REDEMPTION ISLAND!
Gordon: And here's how you get your ticket stamped for the journey. #1. And this is the big one: Do not show your alliance that you're going to use against them in the future.
Jason: The handshake.
Gordon: The handshake with the opposing tribe and trying to get connections over there come the merge. Is it a good idea? Sure. Is it a good idea with your alliance looking at you while you're doing it? Absolutely not.
Chico: And especially not this early when you have to establish a niche. You have to set yourself a role in your existing tribe before you even THINK about the other guys. That's how you play the game.
Gordon: Right. That leads us to #2. What happens to visible pairs in this game?
Jason: They get chopped.
Chico: Like someone on the bad side of Ted Allen.
Gordon: Quickly. Matt and Andrea were becoming an item, which is a solid block of 2. You can't have that this early in the game to be visible.
Jason: Nope.
Gordon: Conversely, Rob and his alliance kept all their scheming quiet, to the point that Kristina played her immunity Idol when she didn't have to.
Chico: I was just getting to that. The alliance of four... that's four votes. Kristina was not going to vote for herself, so at WORST, a 4-4 tie.
Gordon: Right. And it wouldn't be because #3. Matt wasn't paying attention to the scenery.
Jason: The scenery?
Gordon: Matt and Andrea could have made a counter-alliance with Kristina and Philip and maybe drag one person over and gotten rid of Rob, if they were more attentive and saw the alliance change course.
Jason: Of course.
Chico: Seems like Phillip is ALWAYS paying attention. Probably why he's still hanging around.
Gordon: No. I think he's still hanging around because there are bigger threats out there. Rob's group is the 4 majority out of 7 with Andrea, Kristina and Philip in the minority. If they lose again, you get rid of the biggest threat, which would be Philip or Kristina.
Jason: I don't think Philip is going anywhere actually.
Chico: NO! DON'T SAY THAT!
Jason: ROFL
Gordon: ...and Jason just justified that.
Jason: Fine. :)
Gordon: For you newcomers to the show, whatever Jason predicts is wrong.
Chico: I just think it's too early to get rid of physical threats. You need the power to win challenges. Sure you win Survivor by knocking out the other guys, but you have to get to where you are not at risk, and as long as you have to go to TC, you are at risk.
Gordon: Philip is an old geezer, so he's not exactly a physical threat. He has shown, however, to be a threat to jump ship. Here's the dilemma come the merge - and you can see this in both camps.
Jason: Go on
Gordon: Both outsider groups are going to be so eager to jump camps that we could easily see the outcasts joining forces to eliminate both Rob AND Russell's camps.
Jason: So you are saying Rob and Russell possibly wont be at the merge.
Chico: I think at least one will make it. Two... possibly not.
Gordon: If they make the merge, I think they both get usurped by the minority in a repeat or Survivor Season 4 and neither of them make the finals.
Chico: I think of the two returnees, Rob has a better chance of making it to the merge. I don't see Russell making it, since his tribe is a little better mentally than Rob's. They know what Russell's trying to do and they're not letting him do it THAT EASILY.
Jason: And Russell has NO clue Ralph has the Idol.
Gordon: Well, here's another interesting concept.
Jason: Which makes it even more interesting
Chico: I like interesting concepts.
Gordon: What if Russell, in the minority, survives the merge...and bands with Rob?
Jason: *THUD*
Chico: Won't happen. They see each other as threats.
Gordon: Yes, but if I'm Rob or Russell and I see the anti-Rob/Russell sentiment in the group, I realize the only way I win is to have the other one with me in the finals.
Jason: Gordon is right...the enemy of my enemy is my friend
Chico: Well in that case, we should see whose enemy is going to end up on the jury first.
Gordon: We will. What about which Jeopardy teen comes in first?
Chico: That'll be an interesting match indeed.
Jason: Some good stuff this past week, on the Teen Tourney
Chico: I know some of the semi final action has been nothing short of amazing. Thursday's show was a bit of both worlds. You had the fierce, and then you had...



Chico: Let me set the stage for you. Bandon Welch has $21,200 going into the Final. Idrees Kahloon has $6,600. Raya Elias-Pushett has $25,600. So it's interesting betting going into the final. If I'm the leader... do I play it safe, or do I say "eff it, I wanna win"? Same question for the middle player. Idrees... barring blunders from both Brandon and Raya, is going home with $10,000.
Gordon: Pretty much. He really has no shot, assuming the other 2 players don't bet royally stupid. He has to hope there's an absence in thought process from Brandon. Brandon has an easy bet here: $7,999. The maximum he can go while locking Idrees out.
Chico: Points and control to Gordon. That should've been out of the gate easy. Raya should've picked up on that and only bet $3601.
Gordon: Raya has a dilemma and really the only person who's strategy you can't fault here. You have to bet to cover Brandon.
Chico: Oh but she did. She CRAZY did. You know how much she bet? Let me preface this by saying that a bet of $16,801 would cover Brandon. It would also open the door for Idrees, but that's
the book.
Gordon: The right bet for her is $16,801 if she's going to go Mars, or $4,399 if she's going to go Venus.
Chico: She bet... $19,940.
Jason: Whoa
Gordon: Borrowing from a TPIR game, That's Too Much.
Jason: By about 4,000
Chico: Either she did the math wrong or she knows something we don't.
Gordon: So the question, sir?
Chico: The answer is in 7 Wonders of the Ancient World.

THE SMALLEST ANCIENT WONDER, IT WAS THE ONLY ONE EVER MOVED, HAVING BEEN TRANSPORTED TO CONSTANTINOPLE AROUND 391 AD.

Jason: What is the Statue of Zeus?
Gordon: What's the silicon used to keep Joan Rivers alive?
Chico: That's been moved.... Jason's right. The Statue of Zeus at Olympia.
Gordon: Have you ever seen Joan Rivers?
Chico: I've seen her. She looks .... never mind how she looks.
Gordon: Isn't Silicon a natural wonder?
Chico: ... Why yes, yes it is. It's also a wonder that Raya, smart though she may be, got into the final. Because Brandon and Idrees bet the farm and LOST. Pardon me for shooting the Haterade early, and this is a propos of nothing, but I wanted to see what would happen if all three players zeroes out.
Jason: ROFL
Chico: Anyway, let's go to Friday's match with Lindsey Thiesfeld, Erin Hart, and Kailyn Laporte.

Erin: $8800 / Kailyn: $25,200 / Lindsey: $10,000

Chico: No need to do the math here. The game is Kailyn's to lose. Not as exciting but the point is to win. What can we say. The final in Geographic Terms....

THIS AREA THAT INCLUDES SEVERAL COUNTRIES GOT ITS NAME BECAUSE THE COLONIZERS SPOKE SPANISH, FRENCH & PORTUGUESE.

Jason: What is Latin America?
Gordon: What is Jennifer Lopez's Bathhouse?
Jason: Oh man lol
Gordon: Hey she's been around. It wouldn't surprise me if she has a whole United Nations in there.
Chico: ANYWAY!
Jason: rofl
Chico: Jason's correct again, and Kailyn LaPorte and Raya 'That's Too Much' meet one of THESE three people on Tuesday...

Nikhil Desai vs. Raynell Cooper vs. Kate Wadman

Chico: Who've you got?
Jason: I like Raynell's chances.
Chico: Gordon?
Gordon: I'll go with Kate
Chico: Just to be contrarian, I'm going to go with the only WINNER of the bunch, Nikhil. Only one to win, Nikhil. Kate didn't even get the FINAL right. You want to win in tournament play, you have to play 30 minutes of Jeopardy!, no question about it.
Gordon: I went with Kate because the other 2 of you dingalings picked the other 2 people.
Jason: Oh I see ;)
Chico: And Jason picked the guy who doesn't know how to wager in the final to win the thing. And he's Jason's favorite. So I had to go with the other guy. You win with the winner. And if he doesn't, well, there's always American Idol. Top 24 comes out. Thoughts?
Jason: I give the staff props for NOT keeping Chris Medina in the Top 24
Gordon: We'll get to more of this next week, but I'm very underwhelmed here.
Jason: Me too.
Chico: Welcome to the club.
Jason: Yawn city.
Chico: Nobody here is standing out on their own merits.
Gordon: But I do agree here - I'm glad Medina is not there, because he's a shoo in for the win if they kept him there. It's more like I'm glad of who they did NOT put in than who they did.
Chico: Right. Speaking of, let's Big Board this... Because otherwise we're going to have a hard time remembering who's who.

Chico: It's the Idol Class of 2011... Almost.
Jason: Almost
Chico: Almost. Still have to chop the field in half. Let's chop the guys first. We have...

Casey Abrams
Jovany Barreto
Jordan Dorsey
James Durbin
Clint Jun Gamboa
Tim Halperin
Stefano Langone
Brett Loewenstern
Jacob Lusk
Scotty McCreery
Paul McDonald
Robbie Rosen

Chico: I only remember Casey, because he looks like Seth Rogen. I only remember Jovany because he's the only guy who sings in Spanglish. I only remember Brett because... of the hair.. And I only remember Scotty because he's from Garner (which is south of Raleigh).
Gordon: And again, I wonder, why did we spend more time on the eliminated than the chosen?
Chico: Because stories make for better TV than game play. No matter how much that isn't the case.
Jason: At least I have that in my arsenal. Because the chosen aren't that good.
Chico: They really aren't.
Gordon: We know a lot about Chris Medina. We know a lot about Jaycee. We know more about the people who aren't there. What made the earlier versions of Idol so good were the fact we knew people going in. Almost all of them. This is really going to be based on performance on the live show.
Chico: Really will be. The first real taste of what they can do, and you know they have to sell it, sell it, sell it.
Jason: And to a lot of people, this is going to be the first time you see them.
Gordon: On one aspect, playing Devil's Advocate, you want that, so everyone has a level playing field. On the other aspect, you're really playing with fire, because in previous idols, even when a group as a whole sucked, the judges were entertaining. You don't really have entertaining judges - J-Lo and Steven are likable, but I'm not convinced they can come up with the one-liners and the zingers that made people watch. So unless the talent produces, I'm very concerned about the numbers.
Chico: That said... here are the ladies... Finger on the repeat offender button, Jason.
Jason: Got it ready :)

Naima Adedapo
Lauren Alaina
Kendra Chantelle
Ashthon Jones
Thia Megia.

Jason: BUZZ...THERE SHE IS!
Chico: Thank you, Jason.

Haley Reinhart
Karen Rodriguez
Pia Toscano
Lauren Turner
Tatynisa Wilson
Rachel Zevita
Julie Zorrilla

Chico: Now... here's the thing... and I talked to Jason about this earlier... The guys have the "hot guy with guitar". The ladies... "cute girl with magic piano." America for some reason likes to set up John Mayer vs. Sara Bareilles.
Gordon: Cute girl with Magic Piano only gets you so far though
Chico: Tell that to Brooke White, maybe. Don't tell that to Crystal. :-)
Gordon: She was strange chick with guitar
Chico: And you loved that. But to the listing... I only remember Thia Megia, and you all know why.
Jason: America's Got Talent.
Chico: That's right.
Jason: Thia Megia is in the top 12. As long as she performs.
Chico: She cannot win, though.
Jason: You don't know that.
Chico: AGT was a sprint. This is 26.2 vocal miles.
Jason: So what?
Chico: She needs to come out EVERY week, or else it's going to be... "hot guy with guitar", and there goes the series.
Gordon: Thia will get to the Top 12, but I agree with Chico. What killed her on AGT was the lack of diversity. That portfolio needs to be greatly improved this time around.
Chico: Thank you, Gordon.
Gordon: Again, we'll be exploring this in scope and depth next week.
Chico: Yes we will. We'll end this week with a pair of Capsule Reviews about shows that prove that they'll make a show about anything. First up, CW's new entry, Shedding for the Wedding, which we all really liked when it was called "The Biggest Loser: Couples". First, the good...
Gordon: Actually, there's some stuff that I really liked about this show. #1. This isn't about exploitation. Whereas the Biggest Loser is dark and dreary, this is more about setting up a wedding and there is humor behind it.
Chico: We have BOTH parties going at it the same time. So that's already an improvement. And Sara Rue... you all know how I feel about Sara Rue.
Jason: She turned Jenny Craig into a hosting career.
Chico: She can relate, having dropped a few stone for HER upcoming nuptials.
Gordon: She can. And I like the gameplay a lot. I also like in the eliminations, it's not about voting,. It's about actual challenges that rely on the couple's trust on whether or not they can achieve a task.
Chico: Right. So the gameplay is solid. The host is believable...
Gordon: Now the bad. With the exception of the wedding plans, there's absolutely nothing here that you haven't seen before.
Chico: Not to mention the players are all caricaturish.
Jason: Right.
Chico: The couple that sticks out in my mind... the ones that want a beer pong table... "monogrammed, because it's classy".
Gordon: I want, for once, a couple here to say 'hey, we're here to go through a journey and enjoy ourselves and screw the money'
Chico: I mean, the prize should be the adventure. But then it wouldn't be a reality game show, it'd be a documentary.
Jason: Producers unfortunately want characters---hence "Casting"
Chico: Yeah, but there's characters and then there's OBVIOUS characters. It's basically, here's a familiar dish... but we're going to put a banana split next to it, and it's up to you which you want to eat first. And the CW's general audience... is going to go for the split every time.
Gordon: Yes. We want characters, but UNIQUE characters like USA Network Characters, not bottom of the barrel reality stereotypes.

	SHEDDING FOR THE WEDDING CW - Wednesdays 9p ET
	GORDON	CHICO	JASON	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	C	D+	NO GRADE	C-

Chico: Which, unfortunately, this show has in spades. D+
Gordon: I'm going to disagree here. It's stereotypical, but it's done in a fun way. It's more on objective gameplay than stupid social gameplay, and I do like the extraneous touches they put on the show. The casting drops the grade for me, but this is not a bad show. It's average. C.
Jason: Pass here.
Chico: Did you pass on Car Warriors as well?
Jason: (hangs head)
Gordon: BOO
Chico: Gordon, what's this show about?
Gordon: It's Pros Vs. Joes for the car set.
Chico: Yay. So you have a group of experts vs. a group of rank amateurs. And the idea is that it's like Iron Chef... meets UCB. Only instead of creating a car that can do things that a normal car couldn't, you're just customizing a car to basically be... hot.
Gordon: Its a bunch of hand-picked pros vs. an amateur car shop.
Chico: And that's part of the good. This is a real creativity-driven show, with 72 hours on the clock to do something amazing. And it's obvious that everyone involved knows their stuff.
Gordon: People did know their stuff. And it wasn't being stereotypical. They weren't sacrificing characters for game. If you're a car junkie, you'll like this show. This does for car fans like Top Chef does for house cooks.
Chico: This was an awesome show. I couldn't find a thing wrong with it.
Gordon: Oh, but I could.
Chico: I figured you would.
Gordon: #1. The pacing was ridiculously slow. #2. as a non-car fan, I was bored. Not because it was about cars, but because they didn't break it down for us non-car folks. If you REALLY want a hit show, you need to get us dweebs into the action. Top Gear does an excellent job of this. This doesn't.
Chico: Did it take away from the total package?
Gordon: For me, it did.
Chico: Alright. Well, I'm a bit of a gearhead, so I got into it.
Gordon: #3. Subjectivity > Objectivity. I knew why the car won, but I felt cheated a little. It seemed like the lack of originality from the winner should have been more damaging than the tiny flaws on the loser's vehicle.

	CAR WARRIORS Speed - Wednesdays 9p ET
	GORDON	CHICO	JASON	AVERAGE-O-MATIC
	B-	A	NO GRADE	B+

Chico: I really enjoyed it as a game show fan and a gear head. A. This is basically what Ultimate Car Buildoff should've been.
Gordon: Ironically, for me, this is an exact reverse of the strengths and weaknesses of Shedding for the Wedding. However, the execution on this show was better, so B- for me. And I give it a B- because I think that people who are car fans will enjoy this a lot more than I did.
Chico: Guilty. In fact, check out what I did to the choppler... I installed a supercharger for the hamster wheel, fabricated a separate cage for Eve, because she's evil... and for Drew the bookworn... a mini-Kindle. All this means faster, stronger, harder news. And Darnell & Mike gave it a racing stripe. Because it's hot.
Gordon: ...is that hamster hair coating it?
Chico: ... just a little. We can brush that off.
Gordon: OK then. Roll that beautiful Brain Footage.

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: Oh, and the bass of "Move Closer To Your World" is more robust. You gotta have the deep bass. Very important. Also very important, the first item of newsage... I need the bat with the flower on it.
Jason: (hands Chico the Flowered Bat) It's very pretty

... because from the producers of Winter Wipeout comes... "SPRING WIPEOUT!" Coming this March to ABC.

Chico: No, I'm not kidding.
Jason: *THUD*
Chico: It will continue the tradition of people falling down on things up from March 17 to April 14, when "Take the Money and Run" launches.
Gordon: Why not? It's getting decent numbers and it's holding it's own against Idol.
Chico: It's growing from week to week.
Jason: Yes.
Chico: See, this show works.
Gordon: It's doing much better than Chico or I thought it would be. I attribute it to 1. This show works and 2., People aren't buying into the new Idol as much as they did the old one.
Chico: Right on. Other shows that work get greenlights...And I've got a ton o'em.

If you had the following shows renewed this week, come up and claim your prize: Hell's Kitchen, Sunday Best, Biggest Loser, Sing-Off... Thank you.

Jason: Not a surprise on any of them
Gordon: And will deserved for all 4 of them
Chico: Yep
Gordon: And for new shows that hope to make that jump...

We don't have any on this week's Datebook. But we do have the Jeopardy! Teen Tournament's conclusion.

Chico: Yessir. I have a prediction... The winner will be.... a high school student... aged 15 to 17.
Jason: ROFL
Chico: And whoever that is, if he or she is reading, we'd like to talk to you :-)
Gordon: With a guitar?
Chico: Maybe. Maybe not. Who knows! But they will be American. Unlike this item that comes from England.

ITV is signing on for a show where someone will play for big cash money pounds... for someone else. And in the most interesting Bonnie Tyler reference since Nicki French redid "Total Eclipse of the Heart", It's called "Holding Out for a Hero"

Jason: Thats a similar concept which is being done here
Chico: Yep. Ours is called "You Deserve It" and it's coming to ABC... soonish.
Gordon: Morons coming to your internets...nowish.
Chico: (wheels out whiteboard)

Are YOU Smarter than...Jet and Cord, who if they were on any other first episode of The Amazing Race, would be out the door.

Jason: pretty much
Chico: Yep. Next on Logic for Dummies...
Gordon: ...zombies.



Jason: ah!
Chico: *throws a steak*

Hidden Agenda and Pay It Off haven't been on your TV set for a year. That usually mean it's been buried 6 feet underground.

Jason: Good for HA, not so good for Pay It Off.
Chico: And I think I speak for everyone when I say... good riddance. For Hidden Agenda. As for Pay It Off... we hardly knew ye. No seriously, you were pulled five episodes in. Hey GSN! How's that reality thing working for you?
Gordon: Classic shows, good. Reality TV, bad.
Chico: New classics, very good... Baggage, looking at you. High Stakes Poker, looking at you. Now let's look at getting loaded. *burp* pardon.
Jason: You're excused...whatcha got?
Chico: I got voting.

Starting Tuesday, you can vote THREE ways for American Idol... Toll-free via landlines, text message, and now at AmericanIdol.com..and Facebook!

Jason: Actually FB is in!
Chico: Ah, they're linking their Facebook accts. to AmericanIdol.com Sneaky. Only fans with a registered Facebook account in the US, Puerto Rico, and the US Virgin Islands will be able to vote online. Sorry, Vickers.
Gordon: In. That would set us up for a lot of media hoes.,
Chico: (plays "Pimpin' All Over the World")

In this week's Media Ho Report, Mary Murphy beats cancer (yay), Cee-Lo Green and Adam Levine could be judges on The Voice, Watson will be helping out hospitals...

Chico: "Doctor! Come here! I need you!"

Jim Bowen is recovering from a stroke (feel better, Jim!), Vicki Lawrence plays Michigan, and in an article to get Jason drooling, Joey Fatone plays Atlantic City as The Price is Right returns in March.

Jason: Two words.... ROAD TRIP!
Chico: word.
Jason: March 19th for 6 weeks...Sat-wed
Gordon: But none of them are your ho of the week.
Chico: Please say Mark Dacascos...
Gordon: Is Mark debuting a new video on American Idol?
Chico: No, but he is hosting Iron Chef Australia. Seriously. Who're we looking at?
Gordon: Jennifer Lopez. What's the best way to stay relevant? Promote your own video for a new album! J-Lo gets to do that this week on Idol.
Chico: That's totally in the contract, I'm guessing.
Jason: You think?
Gordon: With 'On The Floor'. Since that worked so well for Paula Abdul's song...hey, what song DID Paula Abdul debut on American Idol?

(Crickets)

Chico: ... damned if I know.
Gordon: Yeah, that worked out really well for her. BTW, the song was called 'Dance Like There's No Tomorrow' and it didn't sniff the Top 40.
Chico: No tomorrow indeed.
Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Chico: That's Brainvision, Jason, please.
Jason: (shuts down)
Chico: Okay, still to come on the show, fun things in threes. But first... the absolute worst shows of 2010... because nothing says Oscar weekend excellence like a salute to the Razzies.
Gordon: Good things come in 3's really bad things come in 32's. You're reading WLTI. You give us 22 minutes and we'll give you 22 music singers who you won't remember in 8 months.
Chico: Mario Whatshisface?
Gordon: Him too.

(Brainvision is presented by McCreery's. Burgers. Fries. Shakes. Cokes. And "Your Man" by Josh Turner blaring on the stereos 24/7. Ba da ba ba ba indeed.)

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