Episode 4.13 (Thankful? Are You Kidding Me?) - November
Happy Thanksgiving! We have 6 contestants who may feel
like they are pilgrims wandering into the unknown lands.
By the time this is over, they may feel like the
pilgrims had it easy - and I don't think that their
Thanksgiving feast will be remotely close to what they
have to eat. Let's take a quick peek on the Pilgrims.
Vadim Mordovin (Syracuse, NY - Student) isn't
here to make friends. He's here to win the money. On
most reality shows, he's the villain. On this show, he's
usually the first one out.
Does April Steiner (Mesa, AZ - Professional
Athlete) look familiar to you? She should if you were
watching the Olympic tryouts. She missed qualifying for
the Olympics by two spots (ouch) and she needs to
$50,000 to continue to fund her Olympic dream. Out of
all of the shows that I've seen, this may be the person
with the noblest intentions. Say it all with me now -AwwwwwwBarf.
Kathy Micali (Vancouver, Canada - Gym Owner) is
here to challenge herself. She has always challenged
herself and one - and she sees this as being no
different. Not as honorable as April...
Jason Woolley (NYC, NY - Club Promoter) says that
he could be gone after the first stunt, but that will
happen 'when Hell freezes over - and fortunately for me,
it's looking real sunny outside.' I do like the quote.
Landon Cooper (Helena, Al - Soccer Player) says
that he has been in places where people are more
talented, but he's had the bigger heart. He loves to
shut up people who talk a lot. Have you met Jason?
Elizabeth Costello (Cincinnati, OH - Bartender)
watches the show with her dad - who has been battling
cancer. He has survived 6 months and she wants to show
him that anything can be possible. Wow. 2 AwwwwBarfs in
CHALLENGE 1: WE DIDN'T LAND ON PLYMOUTH ROCK: The
pilgrims are on the S.S. Fear Factor as it navigates
through some choppy waters. Behind the ship is a small
dinghy, and the contestants have to go from the dinghy
to the boat via a cargo net. Think the Western Fear
Factor when they had to pick themselves up from a cargo
net onto a stagecoach dragged around by horses, but
replace water with ground. On the way, they have to
collect 6 flags - and they have to collect it quickly,
because the slowest man and woman will be going home to
their family for dinner a little earlier than expected.
Then again, once they see the feast, they may not be
complaining too loudly about it.
Kathy is first. She is thankful for her friends and
family and that they can all see her on the show. She is
also thankful on the time - 59.7 seconds with all 6
flags. That is going to be a very hard time to beat -
but April says she can beat it. She not only beats it,
she blows it out of the water with a time of 33.8
Elizabeth can send Kathy home if she beats 59.7 seconds.
She struggles to get the first 2 flags, but she makes up
the time and gets it done in 48.3
seconds. Kathy has to go - and she did lose to someone
who wasn't herself.
It's time for the guys to go. Vadim, who has pierced
nipples (thanks for sharing), gets to go first. He says
that he will set the bar high, as Jason seems scared of
him. Jason is certainly not scared of Vadim's time, as
he put up a pathetic 1:03.4. Vadim dropped a flag, and
that may come back to cost him. "Dude, Kathy beat you -
she went home." That's definitely not looking good for
Jason promises to smoke his time. It's a good thing he
didn't promise to smoke April's time, because April's
time still holds, but Jason still gets it done in 44.8
seconds, will under a minute. The last person to go is
Landon, and he says that he's being motivated by...well,
he isn't going to say it until he wins. He's definitely
slower than Jason - but he's faster than Vadim, and
that's the person that he needs to beat. The final time
is 52.1 seconds, and maybe Videm can use his pierced
nipples to shine up the Turkey. 'There's always
Christmas'. Well, not for you on the show, there isn't.
2: FEAR FACTOR FEAST: Joe says that there are 4
stunts in this show (being that it's Thanksgiving), the
second one will not be an elimination contest - but it
will be for $10,000 and a copy of Call of Duty for the
PS2/XBox/Gamecube. In order to win it, they will have to
eat something out of the Fear Factor Feast! They come to
a table that features a turkey with maggots covered all
over. They don't have to eat that, but they do have to
eat this -
1. Worm Green Beans
2. Maggoty Mashed Potatoes with rotten fish sauce gravy
3. Bile Gelatin with African Cave-Dwelling Spiders
4. Beetle, Worm and Cockroach Stuffing
5. Sheep's Brain Pie - with worms
Here's how the contestants have selected their meals -
Elizabeth - Worm Green Beans, Beetle, Insect Stuffing,
Sheep's Brain Pie
Jason - Worm Green Beans, Bile Gelatin with Spiders,
Landon - Worm Green Beans, Bile Gelatin with Spiders,
April - Worm Green Beans, Maggoty Mashed Potatoes,
For each dish the contestants eat, they will get a
tomahawk, to which they can throw on a bulls-eye. The
person who is the closest to the bulls-eye wins $10,000
and decides the order in the next stunt.
After the food is served, Joe wants to say a prayer -
but says that no prayer is going to help them now. Heh.
After the gratuitous eating (and barfing noises), we see
that Elizabeth gets one hatchet, April gets 2 hatchets,
Jason gets 1 hatchet and Landon gets all 3 hatchets.
After they distribute the hatchets, the contestants
distribute their regurgitated lunch all over the beach,
as all Joe can do is laugh.
It's time to throw the hatchets. Elizabeth completely
misses with hers, and April also misses. Landon gets one
in the yellow section, and Jason also gets one in the
yellow section. After the measuring, it's determined
that the person who was closer to the bulls-eye
is...Jason. With only one hatchet, Jason wins the
$10,000, and based on the look on Landon's face, it's a
good thing that they got rid of the hatchets before
announcing the winner.
CHALLENGE 3: THE OLD BALL & CHAIN: Joe, however
will be announcing the third stunt - all of the
contestants will be shackled to a ball and chain. Once
in the water, the person has to unscrew themselves, go
back up to the water, and touch the side of the boat.
The quickest person selects the order for the last stunt
- the slowest person has eaten worms for nothing.
Jason selects April to go first, adding that he has no
competition and he's
not worried about any of them. Landon and April says
that it fuels their fire,
as the pole vaulter wannabe goes first. While Landon and
Jason are talking
trash to each other, April tells Joe that she isn't
worried - and tells Joe that
in the water, she can't freak out. She doesn't remotely
freak out - she is
very quick with a 20.4 second time. She wasn't happy
with the time, saying that she made some mistakes - but
she's not going to say what they were. Oooh, sneaky...
Landon says that it's quick, but he says that it isn't
the first time that he's been in a ball and chain. Wha?
He says that if he advances to the finals, he'll tell
Joe his motivation...but now he doesn't have to, because
he quit the stunt. He couldn't unscrew the wire all the
way - and he says that he'll keep the motivational
factors inside of him. I'm guessing not freaking in the
water was one of them.
Jason is happy that he is the last man standing, and now
once the rules have changed (so that all you have to do
is complete the stunt), he is more than happy to go
next. We now see why he was so happy that Landon
eliminated himself - he completed it in 22.5 seconds, as
April crows about beating Jason. Elizabeth gets it done
in...24.7, which is last - but in this case, last is as
good as making it.
CHALLENGE 4: UNDER THE MAYFLOWER: It is not,
however, as good as first, as April selects the order
for the final stunt. For that stunt, the people have to
swim under the 12 foot hull and clip as many flags as
they can in 2 minutes. Whoever gets the most amount of
flags in the quickest time will be the champion for the
April selects Elizabeth to go first - and she says that
she can set the bar
well. Jason predicts 4 or 5 flags, and
Elizabeth...doesn't hook up her bikini
top. She loses her top, but gets 7 flags in 1:57. She's
hoping that didn't make a huge impact on whether or not
she wins the stunt. It may have made an impact on al of
the horny college male students watching the show.
Jason is next, and he is not concerned about April.
'Who?' he asks. He doesn't have to worry about April -
because he's going to lose to Elizabeth. He realizes
that he has a problem with being underwater and he
doesn't come close to 7 flags. He talks about how the
'brothers' have a history of not doing well in the water
- and that he's happy with his $10,000. Sure, but let's
face it - you choked.
April is next - and she can't afford to choke. With her
Olympic dream on the
line, she goes in like a madwoman. She gets them all in
one minute flat and wins the $50,000. There is something
worse than facing fear on a TV show - it's the fear of
seeing your dreams die. April faced her fear and
conquered it - and hence, we may be seeing her in the
2008 Olympic tryouts.
Since we have some extra time, we get to see a montage
of shows coming up. Here's what we'll be looking forward
Christmas Fear Factor
Best Friends Fear Factor
Another Million Dollar Couple Series
Miss USA Fear Factor
New York Vs. L.A. Fear Factor
Couples Las Vegas Fear Factor
Newlyweds - Orlando Fear Factor
Reality Star Fear Factor - featuring Ethan Zohn from
Survivor, and from The Apprentice... Oma... Rosa.
This sounds like a rocking second half of the season.
Tune in to see the best friends go at it in seven days.
August 30 - Couples
September 6 - Alumni
September 13 - Couples 2
September 27 - Best Friends
October 4 - All-Female
November 1 - Siblings
8 - 100th Episode
November 15 - Models