Episode 28.15 - Fear Is a Factor
December 19

Jason: YUM
Chico: I heard it tastes like chicken.
Jason: It always does.
Chico: Welcome back to WLTI. Thanks for being a part of the week and allowing us to be a part of yours. Now it's time to put our heads on a stick with some Roleplay.
Jason: Here. We. Go. :)
Chico: We can't go one season without it.
Gordon: We truly can't., I'll start it up for Jason. Jason, you are...Coach Chi.

What magical Kool-Aid have you been using this season?

Jason: It is a special blend of the words of Sun Tzu, the magic of Buddha and the weed of Snoop Dogg. It is perfect.
Chico: Quote wall.
Jason: I can use this mumbo jumbo to snow anyone. I mean look at how I played Cochran. Brandon. These people hear all these positive words. And they fall for anything. If you can't impress them with facts...dazzle them with cow manure. Remember I am a 14th cousin twice removed or Napoleon and Richard III.
Chico: And your veins are full of python venom and your eyes are made of mother of pearl. We get it, Charlie Sheen.
Jason: You DO listen. I am the most unique honorable warrior who will let everyone do my dirty work for me.
Chico: Because winning without risk is triumph without glory.
Gordon: Before we turn into the Cult of WLTI, Chico, who's next?
Chico: You are.
Jason: Ohmmmmmmm
Gordon: Ok. Who am I?
Chico: You are Boomie Aglietti.

Thursday's game of Jeopardy! had you tied going into Final Jeopardy with your opponent Beth Watkins at $18,600. What do you do? What. Do. You. Do.

Gordon: WHat does 3rd place have?
Chico: $8600. I'll tell you right now... it's the classic Prisoner's Dilemma.
Gordon: It is. But it's no decision here. I'm from Yale. I bet it all and rely on my smarts to get it right.
Chico: Correct. What if Beth does likewise? Actually, the worst that happens is you bet it all and LOSE.
Gordon: Exactly, but I'm smarter than she is. Give me the question, I'll nail it.
Chico: Glad you asked. American Authors, the category.

He was born in NYC on April 3, 1783, toward the end of the Revolutionary War, & named for one of the War's heroes.

Gordon: Oh I know this one. Who is HanCock A. Mamie?
Jason: NO! (falls over laughing)
Gordon: ...oh.
Jason: Can I tell Boomie?
Chico: Tell Boomie.
Jason: Who is WASHINGTON IRVING? (named after George Washington)
Chico: That's right. Boomie, you have the right move, but the wrong response. That's gotta burn.
Gordon: Yeah well, I'll take my $57,000+ and order a nice beer to drown my tears in.
Chico: That'll do it.
Jason: I have one. Ok...Chico
Chico: Yes, Jason.
Jason: You are...

Nicole Scherzinger. Tell us who you want to win X Factor

Chico: I CAN'T! DON'T MAKE ME CHOOOSE!!!! It's not in me to play favorites! ...
Jason: So do you like Josh?
Chico: Of course I like Josh! He's got this gruff rocker to him.
Jason: So he should win.
Chico: Yes. Melanie's really likeable, and she's got a saucy voice to her. She should also win.
Jason: And Chris?
Chico: And Chris Rene... he's just got soul to him.
Jason: So he should win.
Chico: He should also win.
Jason: But...only one person CAN win. If you HAD to choose, who should win X Factor?
Chico: .... DON'T MAKE ME CHOOSE!
Jason: YOU ARE BEING PAID TO JUDGE!
Chico: *huddles up in fetal position, starts singing Stickwitu*
Gordon: Hey Chico! I've got a plate of waffles here. Would you like the butter or syrup to go with it?
Chico: ... Yes?
Jason: LOL (rolls over laughing) WIN. That was good.
Chico: Thank you. That just made my whole day, tell you the truth.
Jason: All joking aside, that indecision cost her her job for next season.
Chico: Right. Now Jason...
Jason: Oh no.
Chico: I'll tell you right now, this comes from watching a preview of "Who's Still Standing", with everyone "in costume". Apparently someone thought this was a good idea. The end result, Jason, is that our boy Travis Schario is dressed like a fat nerd.
Jason: I saw.
Chico: Anyone who knows and loves Travis knows he IS a fat nerd, but he doesn't have to go on TV looking like it. Because he's pimp.
Jason: Yes.
Chico: So...

YOU are the costume designer of Who's Still Standing. EXPLAIN YOURSELF.

Jason: Well...we had many different ideas
Chico: Why didn't you use the GOOD ones?
Jason: Remember this is costume to hole ratio. We had grape, roulette ball, sumo wrestler... This just screamed trivia!
Chico: It screams WRONG.
Jason: I mean what screams trivia contestant than nerd. Nerds are cool, like Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory.
Chico: Meanwhile you have the gymrat in gymrat gear and you have some chick on a Minute to Win It reject thing. Yeah, but he knows how to dress.
Jason: Ken Jennings.
Chico: Again, knows how to dress.
Jason: Are you calling me stereotypical?
Chico: Very much so, you and everyone like you.
Jason: Oh really?
Chico: Because we all know packaging is the first sign of a weak format.
Gordon: I think he needs to take lessons from the guy from Identity, where he got tired of dressing the women and decided to put them all in bathing suits at the end of the run.
Chico: ... That was nice.
Jason: Works for me.
Gordon: Though I do NOT need to see Travis Schario in any type of bathing suit.
Jason: Not really no.
Chico: Travis, if you're reading, we say this out of love. =p
Jason: Big time.
Gordon: I think Jason has one for me next
Jason: Hmmm....OK...

You are Snoop Dogg. Tell me your strategy for Price is Right.

Gordon: Well you know, I am a really good shopper.
Jason: Really?
Gordon: I watch the show all the time. That's how I get pricing lists for...my magic cookies and Kool Aid
Jason: I see.
Gordon: I send some over to some Benjamin dude earlier on this year. I wonder how he made out with it.
Chico: Gordon... surprisingly nails it.
Gordon: But yeah, I'll do well. I like everything homemade you know.
Jason: I know you do...Home grown, as it were. A very good gardener. You can do good with power tools
Chico: Hydroponic, even.
Jason: What else do you think you would do good at? Cadillacs?
Gordon: You could say I have a green...thumb.
Jason: LOL. Yeah
Gordon: A home bar. With plenty of gin and juice
Jason: Chico get me out of this :)
Chico: Ain't nothing but a G thang, baby.
Jason: Actually Gordon has one for Chico I think... the last one.
Chico: Last one. ... oh no.
Gordon: Finally, Chico. You are...

Ben Flajnik. You are Mr. Bachelor

Chico: At least I got to hit Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Forget the women, We know you're not going to marry any of them. My question is - how are you going to parlay this into a successful media ho career?

Chico: Basically study Jake Pavelka. And not make the mistake of, well, you know, going back to his day job or something.
Gordon: What about dancing?
Chico: ... That would work. Let me check... YES. YES, DANCING. CALL ME ABC. I'll dance the hell out for ya... and then I'll take my partner back to the back for some...err...
Gordon: NEXT ON THE SHOW...
Chico: Pineapples, and what you can do with them.
Jason: A ha :)
Chico: But first, a Brainvision break. We all remember JR Martinez, the winner of Dancing with the Stars, right?
Jason: Yes.
Chico: He's going to be a father.
Jason: Good on ya :)
Chico: Just found out it was a girl. Sa-LUTE. More show after the break!

(Brought to you by Beer Factor. Four teams of contestants perform wicked awesome stunts while drinking the nastiest looking, nastiest tasting brews on the planet... and then holding their bladders afterwards.)

Jason: Sounds like some of my weekends at college.
Chico: Sounds like Quiz Night.
Jason: And BTW...again Tony Hightower...good on ya!
Gordon: Welcome back to WLTI. Now I have some extra pineapple left over from the fruitcake. WHO wants some?
Jason: I do!
Chico: Me!
Gordon: I'll start with this:

Sophie, Rick. Brandon, Let's say you get to go to this season's final 3. Which one of these people do you not want going with you?

Jason: Sophie. She is the one that could be a coattail riding winner.
Chico: Agreed. Rick and Brandon are weak and have no game whatsoever.
Gordon: Make it Trio. Sophie can be dangerous if the big boys aren't there.
Chico: Yep.
Gordon: Next one?
Chico: Next one...

Weakest Link, Dog Eat Dog, Greed. Now that Fear Factor's proving a success in a second life, pick two other early 00s favorites that could succeed as well.

Jason: GREED most definitely and Weakest Link. DED is not remake worthy
Chico: And I don't think Brooke would come back to host it.
Gordon: I think you could do a lot with DED in terms of new stunts. You have nowhere to go with The Weakest Link, who in my opinion had a flawed format to begin with
Chico: Let's get this out of the way... Greed. That was ALWAYS good.
Gordon: Yes. Next one...

Congratulations to John for winning Season 11 of The Biggest Loser. Now I know what NBC did, but you make the call here - Anna, Dolvett or Bob. Who doesn't come back next year?

Jason: Its Anna. WE know she isn't coming back.
Chico: Anna.
Jason: And that's the right call.
Chico: Definitely. I mean, she did NOTHING. I've said this before. I'll say it again. There's a Macy's store somewhere that's missing a mannequin.
Jason: Damn son.
Gordon: I'm going to play Devils advocate and say Dolvett. Anna got a really raw deal getting stuck with people who didn't want to play the game
Jason: Awww...then you MOTIVATE them. Jillian did. Be a ***** if you have to
Gordon: But these contestants...pardon my French...sucked. These may be the worst contestants ever.
Chico: You think so?
Gordon: It would be Jason Block, Chico and Me trying out for Ultimate Fighter.
Jason: ROFL
Chico: Yeah, I mean, sure we can kick each other's asses, but up against top-trained athletes? No chance.
Gordon: You can only do so much, Michael Bisping wouldn't be able to get us in anywhere close to MMA fighting shape.
Chico: I'd give 100% and end up hurting. Jason would go somewhere and cry.
Gordon: That's what I think happened to Anna. She had no chance. The contestants were there for personality more than focus. I say give her another shot
Chico: Okay, next up...

Simon Cowell's going nowhere. But now he has to rethink what to do about X Factor season 2. You know where we're going with this. First place... the panel. LA, Paula, and Nicole. Someone's gotta go.

Jason: It's Nicole. You don't get paid to be a waffler. In all seriousness. That's why Howard Stern is going to be MONEY for NBC.
Gordon: I don't see how the X Factor survives Season 2 with Nicole on staff.
Chico: Agreed, and if I may say so... You guys might be the best in the business, and this might be for the largest prize ever offered on a talent show... but lighten up. I mean, we can't have any tears... any walkouts. You have to be about business always. And you have to put the contestants first. Yeah, it's about a heated rivalry between competitive people, but you have to remember why you're doing it in the first place.
Jason: The money?
Chico: Bingo.
Gordon: Next one...

Brandy, David Hasselhoff, Piers Morgan. You're starting a new talent show. Which one of these 3 ex-judges of AGT doesn't get an invite?

Chico: The Hoff. Have a cheeseburger, man.
Jason: Sorry...Brandy. She did NOTHING on AGT. And she is a murderer.
Gordon: I'll say Brandy, The Hoff at least was entertaining. Brandy was both an inept judge and dull as dishwater. Last one?
Chico: Last one.

Star Search, Love Triangle, and Vegas Wedding Unveiled. I think we all can agree that these are three of the dumbest moves GSN has ever made. So while the jury is still out on Dancing with the Stars on a Saturday, pick two that would be less dumb than the others.

Chico: And yes, you must choose two.
Jason: Love Triangle goes. Sleazy and no redeeming value.
Gordon: Can I go off the board with Big Saturday Night?
Chico: you mean BIG Saturday night? Which actually had some good games on... when they weren't shoving them into wraparounds.
Gordon: Yes please. I'll take that for $50
Chico: Okay. Star Search... well, the first two seasons weren't bad. Season 3 we could've done without. It was too much too soon. Vegas Weddings... who the hell thought that belonged on GSN? At least Love Triangle, for all its repugnancy, had a game behind it.
Jason: NO It didn't.
Chico: I didn't say it was a good game. So get rid of Vegas.
Gordon: If I have to keep the board, get rid of Vegas
Chico: Thank you.
Gordon: And now, one final break - next!

(Brought to you by Mr. Yuck's Senior Citizen home for washed up game show characters, During this time, please remember the poor game show icons who gave their well-beings to keep you entertained. The Whammy, Rapping Dragon, Count Dracula, and yes even Mr. Yuck will thank you,)

Jason: LOL
Gordon: Now...what game show was Mr. Yuck on? (NO GOOGLING)
Jason: Brain Hurts...
Gordon: HINT: The show was on for over 10 years.
Chico: Eh?
Gordon: Here's a full episode of the show, complete with Mr. Yuck.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_NhwDa4n68

Jason: You are kidding me?
Gordon: Mr. Yuck shows up at the 15:03 mark.
Chico: Dude. Old. School. How old? Team #1 are sporting matching mullets.
Gordon: I am old school. How's that for dropping some knowledge?
Jason: You win.
Chico: Yep. Before we get into the Speed Round, a programming note. NEXT WEEK, the show we love to do. It's the 2011 Year In Review Special
Jason: WHOA.
Gordon: Should be fun as always
Chico: Lots of stuff happened, and we're going to go through all of it. Including Gordon's strange fascination with Lifetime-era Supermarket Sweep. Hey.... We all have a guilty pleasure.
Gordon: We do. Speed Round starts...now! X-Factor: Who wins?
Jason: Josh. Plain and simple. How the sheeple are programmed.
Chico: I've said Josh since the beginning. I'm sticking with it.
Gordon: Me too.
Chico: How does Who's Still Standing do?
Jason: Terribly.
Gordon: I think Fear Factor gets it a decent sampling on Monday then it's all downhill from there. Survivor: Coach wins, right?
Jason: I think so.
Chico: Of course. Unless Ozzy wins.
Gordon: Do we have any email?
Chico: Nope, but I'm going to throw something on the wall and see what sticks... It's the Facebook Question of the... Year.

“

WLTI's BIG FACEBOOK QUESTION Fill in this blank: The biggest moment of 2011 in the game show world was....

”

Gordon: Good question, Should be fun to see the answers.
Jason: Agreed.
Gordon: So that ends this weeks show, Special thanks to Jason Block for joining us today
Jason: You got it. Always fun
Chico: Until next week, game over... Spread the love... and Merry Christmas and Happy Chanukah and all that. :-)