Episode 21.6
July 13

Chico: Three words. Big. Saturday. Night. Little too big for me, thanks. The shows, though... Good stuff.
Gordon: We want to like the show. Please make us like it.
Chico: Instead, we like the shows within the show... and that's pretty sad. *sniff* ... Welcome back to WLTI. Hope you're having a good week... What do we have next, G?
Gordon: I'm thinking we need to help GSN raise some more capital so we can have better shows. Who's up for some Excessories?
Chico: I'll take some
Jason: I can.
Gordon: We start with this...

Big Saturday Night., We know both 20Q and The Money List have their own merchandising opportunities. What can we do here?

Jason: How about muzzles?
Chico: Oodles. In paper form. With Keegan Michael Key's face on them. With the words "Promotional Tool" on the top. ... ACCIDENTAL HUMOR! :-)
Jason: No truer words were said :)
Gordon: What about the Ross Matthews stress doll. Throw him against the wall and listen to his high pitched wails once he makes contact with it?
Jason: You win :)
Chico: I'll buy THAT for a dollar.
Gordon: Yay, promotional tools. Next one?
Chico: Next is... X Factor.

Simon Cowell is really looking at bringing this to the US. What on earth could help him with this?

Jason: Naked British Babes.
Chico: That's your answer to everything, isn't it?
Jason: Am a bad guy for saying so?
Chico: I didn't say THAT.
Gordon: I've got something better than that. Naked NORWEGIAN babes, ya?
Chico: That's YOUR answer to everything, isn't it?
Jason: Seriously though...a nice marketing campaign helps.
Chico: You know what REALLY helps, though?
Gordon: So wait, Mr. Pure and wholesome, what's your response?
Jason: What?
Chico: Naked AUSTRALIAN babes! Come on, now!
Gordon: Whoo-hoo! Seriously, the best excessory we could give them? A Tour bus to go across the U.S. to the places where they haven't canvassed for talebnt the first 569,000 times.
Jason: Agreed.
Chico: Muncie, Indiana... we're coming for you.
Gordon: What about the Dakotas?
Chico: I vote for North Dakota.
Gordon: Or somewhere like the New England states? Buffalo? Maine? They are a part of the US, you know.
Chico: Alaska.
Gordon: Just a thought. Next one...

The Fashion Show. It's going to get lost once Project Runway shows up. Help them find their way.

Chico: A better licensing deal. They need to have the winner up in Macy's or something.
Jason: How about better clothes :)
Gordon: Here, here.
Chico: that too. I think this week's happenings revealed the major failing of this show.. in that they're going for the second-rate Runway crowd.
Jason: And second rate is the first loser.
Gordon: To let your 5th placed finisher get that far because he's taking other people's identities - not good. Second person in the competition to do that. Next one?
Chico: Yich.: Next..

And now, playing the roles of Monty Hall, Jay Stewart, and Carol Merrill... Wayne Brady, Jonathan Mangum, and Rachel Reynolds. What'll help them get the surefire pickup?

Jason: Not a D(^_^) in a box.
Chico: And that's the show. Good night, everybody. :-)
Jason: New game show merch. Seriously. You need to keep it family friendly with new game show merch... video games, board games, cross promotion with GSN.
Gordon: More than ever, believe this or not - Gift Certificates.
Chico: Gift cards, even. From many a place. Amazon.com... Best Buy...
Jason: Bed Bath and Beyond
Chico: ... Walmart, even.
Gordon: The contestants should win things that they can use to jumpstart the economy. And I don't mean online stuff.
Chico: Just... just stuff.
Jason: Yeah.
Gordon: Help them spend money at Brick and Mortar companies, We need to get the economy going. Giving out stuff that they need to buy things with will help.
Chico: And I think I have an idea... Remember on an episode of Trato Hecho, one dude offered himself and his services as a prize? Remember how cool that was?
Gordon: Exactly.
Chico: We need something like THAT!
Jason: The dermatologist I think it was? Some high end Beverly Hills doc. But yeah
Gordon: It would be fun to see Isaac Mizrahi come out and offer a $2,000 wardrobe or a $5,000 fashion spree with a personal shopper?
Chico: That could be totally wicked.
Gordon: Its creative, and it would work.
Jason: Or how about Suze Orman giving $5,000 and a session on how to invest it.
Gordon: I like it.
Chico: The possibilities are endless. They really are.
Gordon: Now let's see them use their brains. Next one...
Jason: And if Fremantle is listening...there is another show on Studio 33 that can do that too :)

Millionaire. It's their worst ratings yet and they need a commmercialmakeover. Give it to them.

Jason: You need a more intense promo tour.: Send Meredith out and do a quick road show
Gordon: What about the Millionaire Stopwatch? Keeps time in 15 second increments.
Jason: How about Ask- An Expert Magic 8 Ball
Chico: I was actually thinking a d12 or something like the 20Q game, but an 8 ball works.
Gordon: Is it D (shakes it)...no seems likely.
Jason: ROFL
Gordon: Last one?
Chico: Last one... Oh, BTw, the correct answer is a Slumdog Millionaire DVD. Heh. Finally...

Help the Great American Road Trip find its way.

Chico: I already have an idea. BILLBOARDS.
Jason: How about Rest Stops. Lots of Rest Stops
Chico: RVs.
Jason: Waffle House sponsorship... or Cracker Barrel.. You seem them EVERYWHERE.
Gordon: The Great American Road Trip Map.
Chico: GPSes!
Jason: with kids annoying voices programmed in them.
Gordon: 'Are We There Yet'? Or compass with the needles pointing the wrong direction - because it's about the journey.
Chico: We could go on all day
Jason: Port-a-Pottys?
Chico: Just a little further!
Gordon: Port-O-Potty, so you can let them know what you REALLY think of their show :)
Chico: Ha.
Jason: The viewers did. That's why its on Mondays. :)
Chico: Okay, let's go out and pay a few bills. When we come back... Whammies. Lots and lots of Whammies.
Jason: I have to hop. G, see you at 7.
Gordon: See you at 7. And see you all after this!

(Brought to you by The Great American Road Rage. Who's the angriest driver in the country? John McEnroe hosts when he's not bursting out in fits of rage)

Gordon: Does he throw tennis rackets from the passenger side?
Chico: If his aim is good enough. You can't be serious! I am. That's why I take the train. And this one's going to Whammyville.
Gordon: population: Many...plus 6 that we get to add this week. Start us off.

TJ & the Little Mamas or Eleisha Miller. They're the apple of the eyes of stage moms everywhere this week. But who's going to go further and who's going to get... the Makeup Whammy?

Gordon: Ok. How old is Eleisha?
Chico: 8
Gordon: How old is TJ and the Little Mamas?
Chico: Ranging from 6 to 9. But they're all equally precocious.
Gordon: I think you have to send it to TJ's group. It's not just natural talent. There's a planned stage act over here, and I don't know if they are as good as they think they are. Sorry. Send a Baby Whammy over their way.
Chico: There go you, sir..."Now that I'm a star, I need makeup.. Makeup! *rrrrrroong!*"
Gordon: Thoughts?
Chico: We have one raw talent versus MANY who just prance around.. So yeah.. Agreed.
Gordon: Next one.., The 'Speelling Bee Whammy' Spell Loser..Y...O...U...Loser!'.

Here's the last 5 celebrities for Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader. They are...Jack Hanna, Star Jones, Bill Goldberg, Sugar Ray Leaonard, and Dean Cain. Who gets a Whammy fore being the most likely to fit that statement?

Chico: Star Jones! She's a lawyer, yes... but she's since abandoned the practice for media hodom. Can't put Dean Cain up there, because he went to Princeton... Jack Hanna's a renowned animal scientist, so he's out. Sugar Ray and Goldberg are just too obvious. So yeah.. Star Jones.
Gordon: ok Star Jones is a lawyer, so I don't see her crashing out.  Dean and Jack are untouchable, for the reasons you mentioned.  Goldberg went to college at Georgia. Leonard never went to college and as a boxer, took it in the head (which is what boxers do). So I'd give it to Sugar Ray. Sorry.
Chico: Okay.. Next... We have... the b-boy Whammy... or "the breakdancing whammy"

Let's go with the Dance Your Ass Off crew versus the America's Best Dance Crew crew. One is delaying starting for a best-of clip show. The other... is an exploitation of fat people.

Gordon: Can I send both the Breakdancing Whammy and the Aerobics workout Whammy over there?
Chico: Why not? Whammy all you want. We'll make more.
Gordon: There's nothing wrong with exploiting your time slot.
Chico: No, but a clip show?
Gordon: And it's not exploiting the fat people as much as its' exploiting my digestive tract. You know what next week's theme is?
Chico: What's that?
Gordon: ...The Stripper Pole. That's right kids, all of your favorite fat people get to work a routing based on a stripper pole.
Chico: Look out...... chuck bucket!
Gordon: (Hands over the Fear Factor Chuck Bucket to Chico)
Chico: *does*
Gordon: So yeah. Pass that whammies over there.
Chico: Okay, I feel a lot better. Next?
Gordon: Next one...

The Martha Stewart Whammy. Does it go to Johnny Rodriguez, for making up a dress pattern based on someone else, or JAG, the original person who knocked off his resume?

Chico: Padded, Gordon. He PADDED his resume. Seriously. Johnny is lying to get himself through the game. JAG lied to get himself in the front door.
Gordon: Johnny padded the dress, so it's all equal :) But this isn't the first time Johnny has made knock-offs. It's just the first time he got caught. He's even said that he's done it more than once.
Chico: So it's quality vs. quantity. I'm going to go with quality. Give the whammy to JAG. He made ONE mistake, but it was a BIG ONE.
Gordon: So what's worse - the person who did it to get in the front door but was original once he got there, or the person who was original to get there, but who wasn't original from the first day the competition started?
Chico: JAG denied someone else a chance. That's a big mark in my book here.
Gordon: True. Ok Johnny was bad, but JAG is still the worst and gets a whammy. Next one?
Chico: Next... The Supremes Whammy.... "All I need is cash, I said gimme all your money... (give back the money). I said gimme all your money... (give back the money)."
Gordon: I like that song.

On one hand... Paula Abdul says that she's "optimistic" about going back to American Idol, never mind that auditions are already underway. On the other hand... Kara dioGuardi's song... dropped from Kris Allen's set for, for lack of a better term, sucking out loud. Whammy one.

Gordon: Second, hours, so many days. which one to whammy? I can count the ways...
Chico: *begins playing piano*
Gordon: Every moment lasts forever, when you feel Paula's lost her way... What if her chances are already gone? Maybe she believes that she could be wrong. But Kara gives me one good reason to whammy her and never walk away. With every step, you hit another whammy, every breath it's harder to believe, you'll make it through the pain, weather the hurric...really, Kara, how in the world could you make up this drivel?
Chico: I think we know the answer to this question.
Gordon: Send a whammy to both of them on principle, but send Kara a second one, for having to make us endure this mess of a song (vs. the mess that's been Paula for 8 seasons)
Chico: Finally...
Gordon: Last one...

The American Express Whammy. We have Megan, who wants a Millionaire, and Chance/Real, who both want another shot at love (though that's another crappy show altogether). They'll be gracing your sets in August, Chico.  Who gets a Whammy Ho?

Chico: I'm going to go with Megan here. Real and Chance... Both from I Love New York. But here's where we differ. Megan was on Megan Wants a Millionaire.. Charm School.. Rock of Love 2... BUT the one show not of the Surreal Hierarchy... Beauty and the Geek. This Whammy's got Megan's name all over it
Gordon: I think at least that Megan is setting her goals high. She wants a Millionaire. All we're going to get from Real and Chance are more skanky dummies. but Megan may learn something from this. I'll send a set of whammies to Real and Chance,
Chico: Is a ho by any other income still an attention-deprived sort?
Gordon: Yes, but at least she'll be a rich media ho and graduate from the land of the skanky dummy.
Chico: You'd LIKE to think so :-)
Gordon: I do. I'd also like to think that we get a break next.
Chico: Then we get the SPEED ROUND
Gordon: Right after this!

(Brought to you by Promotional Tools. It's the new game show where anyone can be a promotional genius - but can you be a tool? It's like Promotional Consideration, but it's one step beyond! Keegan Michael Key hosts.)

Gordon: Could you be a Promotional Tool?
Chico: Sorry. Don't have it in me
Gordon: But it looks like so much fun!
Chico: I'll see your promotional tool... and raise you ... Billy Bush
Gordon: ...you sure know how to ruin the mood, don't you?
Chico: I try. :-)
Gordon: You have a Speed Round in you?
Chico: I got one. So Big Brother... who's the first out the door?
Gordon: I think Lydia is in a world of trouble, but this past night brought us a bunch of new candidates. I think we won't know until Thursday
Chico: There's a first.
Gordon: AGT - do we see the winner this week?
Chico: I think we do. Call it a case of saving the best for last.
Gordon: Could be. Still a bunch of acts that were good that I haven't seen yet in NYC. How far does Jack Hanna get on 5th grader?
Chico: I'm thinking... He gets to the million, but doesn't go for it.
Gordon: Jack and Star are on the same show. That doesn't bode well for either of them. Harper's Island: It was Henry all along. Thoughts?
Chico: I had it figured out from the first episode. Usually on a good ep of CSI, you don't know who did it until they come forward with it. And let's see... 10 years... 13 weeks... Just sayin'.
Gordon: It's sad when you figure it out after episode 1 and then throw it out because you think it's too easy.
Chico: It made you sad, didn't it? Catch It Keep It. Watching?
Gordon: Definitely watching. I'm also watching some viewer mail. What do we got?
Chico: We got one from Steven Waldie, who thanks us for posting the last one.

Chico: Thanks, Steven. I haven't heard anything from anywhere either. I'm hoping mother and babies are doing well. You know, no news is good news.
Gordon: Same here. But we haven't heard anything bad, so hopefully, everyone's ok.
Chico: There you go. Any more from you?
Gordon: Nope. That's it for me. Where can they send us mail to?
Chico: They can send us mail at wlti@gameshownewsnet.com or check us out on Facebook, YouTube, or Myspace. Just look for... shocker, We Love to Interrupt.
Gordon: There you go. And that ende another week. Special thanks to Jason Block for joining us.
Chico: And special thanks to you for reading. Let's do it again next week, shall we? Until then, for Gordon and everyone at GSNN, I'm Chico Alexander...
Gordon: Game Over - and Spread the Love.