June 25, 2007

Jason:  LOL
Gordon: Hopefully, we won't be sending them or them movie to a Deserted Island.
Jason:  Was I the last ruler of this Island?
Gordon: Yes. would you like to remain the ruler?
Jason:  I feel benevolent....I wish that Chairman Chico become the ruler of this Island. (hands over the Tiki Torch and the Coconut Hat). I serve to you, my liege.
Gordon: Congratulations Chairman. What would you like to name the island?
Chico:  I hereby name this island... Two-and-a-Half Mile Island.
Gordon: YAY!
Chico:  Because there's gonna be a nuclear accident in the near future caused by its inhabitants. Who will be the first to be stranded on my island?
Gordon: Would you like the first set of candidates, Chairman?
Chico:  I humbly give the first floor to you.
Gordon: First set...

Aaron of Hell's Kitchen or Clay of Top Chef 3. Both of them were clearly overmatched, Do we get send over the person who didn't have the skills, or the person who didn't have the emotional fortitude?

Jason:  Aaron. THere's no crying in reality TV.
Chico:  Or passing out. Aaron goes.
Gordon: I'd say Clay. Aaron may have had a legit medical condition. You can't possibly not know the cooking terms and expect to win anything. Even I knew what an Amuse Bouche was.
Jason:  What is an Amuse Bouche?
Gordon: Its a small bite-sized appetizer. Clay made a fruit soup inside a large apple.
Chico:  I rescind my choice and send Clay over.
Jason:  Yeah...what Chico said. You have to know your cooking.
Chico:  Definitely won't see HIM on Iron Chef. To the Island! Next up...

We have the Kittens... seven incredibly horny ladies aged in their 20s.... or the Cougars... seven incredibly horny ladies aged in their 40s. Because Clay has to populate the island... somehow.

Jason:  And if you are going with the population angle, 20's are it.
Gordon: Clay has that Southern thing going on. The kittens will serve him better. Can we toss Mark Consuelos with Clay as well?
Chico:  I'll allow it. Next?
Gordon: Next one...

We still have Mario Vazquez gate, as the person who is suing FOX, Magdaleno Olmos, is forced by a judge to take the case to arbitration, since the agreement he signed to work on the show says that he can not sue FOX and must take his case to arbitration. Here's the question...Do you send FOX over for creating that sort of contract to force someone to sign, or do you send Olmos for being dumb enough to sign it and damn the consequences?

Jason:  Olmos.
Chico:  The fault is not within the stars, but within ourselves. Olmos. He knew what he was getting into.
Jason:  People have to read the contracts they sign and take responsibility for their own actions. What a concept.
Gordon: I'm not sure if he knew what he was getting into, but let that be a lesson to everyone who wants to be in the entertainment industry. MAKE SURE YOU READ A CONTRACT BEFORE SIGNING IT!!!
Chico:  That's just good life sense. Next...

National Bingo Night is coming to an end... awwwww... Ed Sanders is going back to helping Ty Pennington do... whatever it is he does, but where are Yesenia Adame and/or Sunil Narkar going to go?

Jason:  No Yesenia...Sunil comes to the island.
Gordon: I'll send Sunil too - but can we add the Bingo Drome to it? It looks cool.
Chico:  Why not. They need something to keep them occupied..
Jason:  Make sure we paint the coconuts and you have a deal.
Gordon: It will be good to teach the kids the power of numbers
Chico:  Because I'm the numbers guy. :) Before we continue, though.. One more no-bingo for old time's sake. One.. two.. three...
Everyone:   NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BINGO!
Chico:  And for Gordon... O-69.
Gordon: That pretty much describes the show.
Jason:  LOL
Gordon: Which gets an early vote from me for next year's Zonk Show Award
Chico:  Actually, it's eligible now. You could nominate it right now and no one would look at you funny.
Gordon: It won't win this year though. Way too many bad shows out there much worse than Bingo
Jason:  And if you guys haven't voted...vote.
Chico:  True. Next?
Gordon: Next one...

Don't Forget the Lyrics or The Singing Bee. One of them will crash and burn. You tell us which.

Chico:  Singing Bee. NBC really f-ed up trying to keep up with the Joneses. Or conversely, I'd like to go off the board and say that BOTH shows will crash.
Jason:  Dammit, Chico you stole my idea.
Chico:  I need to borrow the official WLTI coin.
Jason:  (hands over the coin)
Chico:  Thanks... (flips).... Singing Bee it is!
Jason:  I will go with Singing Bee as well. Not by much, though.
Gordon: I'll say both shows will fall off the vine and die quickly. This is an idea that sounds only 'ok' on paper and I dont see the concept getting past Summer programming.
Chico:  I'll allow it. So... yeah, both singing shows... Done. Points to camera... Finally...

In the spirit of Without Prejudice, we took five people from the commercials, and it'll be your job to, without prejudice, determine who gets the final slot. This is a video question, so...pay attention to the monitor.

Chico:  Should we send...

Chico: Place! Bets! Now!
Jason:  #4.
Gordon: #5. Looks the most like Mark Consuelos
Jason:  lol
Chico:  #3... Scary. So, to recap...

The Chairman has launched a new culinary school on the Island. Clay will be cooking for the feast while contestants #3, #4, and #5 will be his sous chefs. The 20 something become the waitresses and the kids that they have from breeding with Clay and Mark Consuelos will be either singing with Wayne Brady and serenading the guests or will be used in the back kitchen as cheap labor. After the meal, Sunil will be firing up the Bingo Drome, and Magdaleno Olmos is the new ball boy as the customers race against Mark Consuelos to see who gets a Bingo first for the chance to be a new sous chef.

Gordon: Does the Chairman Approve?
Chico:  We have a bingo!
Jason:  Yay!
Chico:  And we have a break. When we return... Gordon takes things TOTALLY out of context.
Gordon: Who me?
Jason:  When is THAT different :)
Chico:  See what we're talking about... After the break.

(Brought to you by Clay's House of Frying. Everything tastes better frying! Just fry everything and use lots of Saffron and you too can be the next Top Chef! No Foam allowed, though. This week's Special: Gail Simmons' Toe!)

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