Chico:  Welcome back to the... how you say... show...we've reached playtime with Jason, Alex, and Josh here...
Josh:   Yay.
Gordon: Well, now that he got that out of the way, it's time to distribute the whammies. Everyone open up your Whammy bags and lets see which one you've got.
Chico:  I got a car! No, wait.. Wrong show.
Jason:  I got a Flokati Rug! I automatically lose! :p
Alex:   Heh
Josh:   I just got a headache.
Gordon: I got the Bowling Whammy - I'm Bowling for Bucks...and it's a Strike!
Jason:  I got.... the Liberace Whammy???
Gordon: NO comment. Chico and Alex?
Chico:  I've got the Coffee Whammy.  Because I'm caffeinated.
Gordon: Do you have coffee beans in your pants?
Chico:  No comment.
Alex:   I have the Hockey whammy.
Chico:  Okay, Gordon, what do we do with these Whammies?
Alex:   Nah.
Gordon: Your whammy, Josh?
Josh:   I hit Big Bucks.  Be on your way.
Jason:  ....you got an extra spin, there. Pass it to me!
Josh:   I'd like to pass my spin to Jason.
Jason:  Yay!
Josh:   And comment about how ridiculous I feel :)
Jason:  Big Bucks.....STOP! Awww (Whoooo, whoooo). I got two whammies! *Fortune Teller*
Josh:   I honestly don't even know most of the names of the Whammies or I'd play along.
Chico:  Just stick him with Fang and let's get going.
Gordon: Josh - I give you Fang the Whammydog. Chico. Let's begin.
Josh:   Now, is this the mature, grown-up game to get us away from the sandbox? ;-)
Gordon: Here's what we do with them  - we will be having a selection or people or shows. Your job is to sic your whammy on the one that needs to get one.
Chico:  Okay... the execs at Millionaire or the execs at ABC for Play for a Billion. Both had some success, but were mitigated by more setbacks. Which one was the worst?
Alex:   Execs at ABC. I must be one of the few that feels the Millionaire changes weren't THAT bad - Albeit, the new money chain needs a tiny bit of work.
Chico:  That's really the only complaint I have, too. I just needed a related choice.
Alex:   But PFAB was much much worse.
Josh:   I thought Billion was better this year than last.
Gordon: Play for a Billion was pretty weak this year - I have to go with the majority. Next up - The Donald or Mark Cuban. Which one do you send a Whammy to?
Alex:   MARK CUBAN
Chico:  The Donald. I actually LIKE Mark Cuban.
Alex:   Actually, can I send it to both?
Gordon: no - Only Jason has 2 whammies
Alex:   But The Apprentice is original at least. The Benefactor is basically Without Prejudice, with a reality twist - and for a lot more money.
Chico:  Funny, Alex. I said the same thing.
Jason:  Mark Cuban. :p
Gordon: I don't understand why I should care about two people I don't know playing a game of Jenga. Lack of character development is bad. I toss my Whammy in Mark Cuban's direction.
Alex:   ABC needs to do something badly.
Gordon: They do a lot of things badly - like air TV shows.
Alex:   lol, yeah
Chico:  So apparently me and Mike Klauss are the only ones who like the Benefactor.
Alex:   Regis needs to save them again.
Chico:  True... The set designers of Balderdash I or Balderdash II. For reference, II is the glittery set. Who gets a Whammy?
Alex:   Balderdash 2, no doubt. They can't seem to find a happy medium. Balderdash 1 was too bare. Balderdash 2 is too glittery
Gordon: Can I toss the whammy at the celebrity coordinator instead?
Josh:   Have fun.
Jason:  I toss both my whammies at both of them.
Chico:  Please, do.
Gordon: Fire whammies! Wheeeeee!
Alex:   Best set PAX has ever made was On The Cover, but best game was Dirty Rotten Cheater.
Gordon: DRC blew chunks.
Alex:   I loved DRC.
Chico:  Reel to Reel?
Alex:   Don't make me relive that.
Gordon: I think my favorite Set was The Liar's Club - the 70's Version
Chico:  More lights. Okay, Gordon, I'm blind here. More Whammys, please.
Gordon: OK. Tuesday from 8-10 features Amazing Race, Big Brother, Last Comic Standing, World Series of Poker, The Next Great Champ, King of the Jungle 2 and Dream Job, while Thursdays from 8-10 has Survivor, The Apprentice, CSI, Extreme Makeover, the WWE and the OC. Which time slot do you send whammies to the coordinators?
Chico:  Hard to choose.
Alex:   Let me erase WWE from my mind
Chico:  On one hand, show overload. On the other... the WWE..
Alex:   Send the Whammy to Thursday. Tuesday is better.
Chico:  Have to side with Alex. Mostly because of CSI.
Gordon: Which time slot has the better shows, Jason?
Jason:  Obviously NOT Thursday. :p
Chico:  Obviously
Gordon: What don't you like on Thursdays?
Chico:  Extreme Makeover, the WWE. Don't care that much for the OC. Tru Calling, on the other hand...
Gordon: lol - so we send the Whammies to Thursday night - Chico?
Chico:  Right. There are two more CSIs to make up for it.
Jason:  BOTH whammies to Thursday. Heck, ALL whammies to Thursday night.
Chico:  It's a Whammy infestation.
Jason:  Not only because they are crappy shows, but it's the reason I have a life. :-p
Gordon: Sorry Donald and Jeff Probst. Next question, Chico?
Chico:  File this one under horribly mismatched cohosts. CBJ's Alex Borstein or Fake Out's Tina Malave. Apologies if I've done this before.
Alex:   I often get jokes via email about GSN's show Celebrity BJs
Jason:  LMAO
Alex:   But that's on Spice TV, Not GSN. I was waiting for Craig Kilborn last night, so I turned on TV Guide and Alex Borstein was on. They made each guest, Andy Dick and her, say what they are currently on. She completely left off Celebrity Blackjack.
Gordon: Fake Out Sucks. Next Action Star didn't suck, but it wasn't good. Let's whammy Tina.
Alex:   As much as I love Fake Out, Tina is just bad.
Jason:  Heh
Alex:   Alex is not only funny, but shares my name. She kicks ass.
Gordon: Alex doesn't really fit in CBJ, but she does have talent
Alex:   CBJ wouldn't be as funny without her.
Chico:  She's the female Dave Foley.
Jason:  Nice!
Chico:  So Tina, don't open any red boxes in the near future. One more, Gordo.
Gordon: Who gets the last Whammy - Jay Mohr or Julie Chen?
Alex:   Julie Chen
Jason:  Hmm...
Alex:   Jay Mohr is at least kinda funny
Jason:  *tosses whammy in Jule's direction*
Gordon: Jay Mohr grates on me like cheese and is just annoying.
Chico:  Julie Chen.
Gordon: He needs a new skit - or maybe its LCS overload. either way. He needs a whammy.
Jason:  This was kinda a toughie for me, but I can tolerate Jay better than Julie.
Chico:  Not for me. Jay's funny. Julie's a soulless destroyer of planets.
Gordon: You equating Julie to Galactus?
Chico:  Wouldn't you?
Gordon: Well, I don't really see her as eating contestants. Roseanne, on the other hand...
Chico:  Not contestants. Just their souls..
Gordon: ok - The Whammy bag is empty. We need to reload for the Big Five, where we get into shows that are really deserving of Whammies. Commercial please.
Chico:  Big Five is next. Jason and Alex, you're helping.

(Brought to you by Sajak/White '04. A car in every garage and a ceramic Dalmatian in every house)

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