Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and if you don't
like who won the presidential election, don't blame me. I voted for Ryan
Chico: Hi, I'm Chico Alexander... don't blame me, I voted for Dunkleman.
Gordon: And you can't blame Don Harpwood either,
because he's Canadian.
Chico: But for those who did vote... we salute you.
Gordon: (Salute) But I elect that we have fun for
the next few hours.
Chico: Good idea. From Somewhere in America... the
PEWS edition of WLTI... is... on!
Gordon: (plays the National Anthem).
Chico: PEWS standing of course for Post-Election
Gordon: Don Harpwood joins us as we look at our
first show - which votes not by polls, but by cases.
Chico: We're going to take one case for good and one
for bad... you know, due to equal time laws and whatnot.
Gordon: Deal...or No Deal. So we gave out a
million., How do we top it? Give out 2 million...or try to.
Chico: Yeah, tell me how that worked out. It didn't,
Gordon: Not when you wipe out the top 3 cases in the
first round, no.
Gordon: So tell us what happened, Mr. Chico.
Chico: Be glad to. We had two players this show round. The first is Steve
Smiley, who, as we know, knocked out the top three cases in round 1. Waa waaaaaa.
Chico: Eventually, he ends up dealing for $60,000.
In his case, $750.
Gordon: Still a very good deal.
Don: A nice total any day.
Chico: Yeah, but he could've stopped at one time
with $68,000... not to mention all the hot dogs the banker could throw at him.
He's a hot-dog vendor, after all. A tasty deal nonetheless.
Gordon: Very tasty indeed.
Chico: Next player is Tia Lampone, a student at UNC-Charlotte... go 49ers. She
knocked out $2 mill in round 1. Then the player who likes head-butting knocks
out $1 mill in round 3. When her game continues Friday, she'll still have a shot
at $500K. So there's something to look forward to... but if you're like me,
you're already tired of all the stunts that sweeps had to offer on DOND.
Gordon: We have one more stunt to talk about this week. Speed Dealing!
Don: 4 games in an hour. Talk about fast money...
Chico: That deserves a bell... *ding*
Gordon: We celebrate a very special 200th Episode of
Deal or No Deal with people playing the board hard and fast for a million. Big
- Frank sells $50,000 for $14,000
- Odalys sells $10 for $198,000
- Andre sells $25 for $38,000
- Danielle sells $25,000 for $72,000
- Howie eats cake
Gordon: Subject Matter - DOND #200. Chico will
let us know who played and what they won.
Chico: Okay, first some ground rules... This is a
standard board. But once Howie delivers a bank offer, the player has 20 seconds
to decide Deal or No Deal. Kinda like the Millionaire clock in that aspect. If
the clock lapses, it's No Deal, and play continues. NOT ONLY THAT, but all cases
in the round are chosen before they are opened. Got it? Good.
Gordon: That's speed, baby.
Chico: Speed indeed. First is Frank Ross and case #12. His highest offer came in
round 1 ($65,000).
Chico: He ends up dealing for $14,000. He was
sitting on $50K. So bad deal.
Gordon: Booo. Banker: 1, Player: 0
Chico: Next is Odalys Piedra on case 18. Her highest
was 244K. She ends up taking the final offer of her game, $198,000. She either
had $500,000 or $10... She had... $10.
Chico: Good deal.
Gordon: Banker: 1, Player: 1.
Chico: So we tie it up at one. OH, did we mention if
the players get a million combined, the Banker was going to have to dive into a
Gordon: No, but thanks for informing us. Please continue.
Chico: I will. Third player Andre Vanchot has case
19. Highest offer came in round 1: $50,000.
Chico: He deals after round 4 for $38,000. In his
case: $25. Another good deal.
Don: True, but it also means the possibility of the
Banker jumping into the cake is getting quite slim...
Gordon: Banker: 1, Player: 2
Chico: Did you honestly expect a million to go in
one night? =p
Don: Not really, no. :P
Gordon: Total amount: $250,000, which means the 4th
person needs to have hit $750,000 or a mil.
Chico: Okay, final player is Danielle Carranza.
Final case is #1. Her biggest offer came at the end of round 7 with $225,000.
One round later... Deal for $72,000.
Gordon: Waa waaaaa.
Chico: In her case... $25K.
Gordon: Still a good deal. Banker: 1, Player:
3...but no cake.
Chico: Not for the banker, but Howie gets all up in
Gordon: Let them eat cake! Now Chico, we get lots of
email on Deal or No Deal.
Chico: Yes we do.
Gordon: And we get ONE question more than any other
about the show
Chico: And that question is...?
Gordon: The question: When do you think the
syndicated version will give out the $500,000?
Chico: The answer?
Gordon: And the answer, if Wednesday's episode has
anything to say about it, is not for a very very very long time.
Chico: Really? Do tell.
Gordon: The player is Sabrina Baxter. She has 4
cases left on the board. And here they are:
$1, $200, $250,000, $500,000
Gordon: Deal, or No Deal?
Chico: NO DEAL.
Don: I'd keep going.
Gordon: This is a gimme. There's no way you should
deal. If anything but the $500,000 comes off the board, the offer will double.
Even if $500,000 goes away, you still have $250,000 up there. Its definitely a
NO DEAL. Sabrina...deals for $96,000.
Chico: So what happens next?
Gordon: Next case...$200. Next case...$1.
Don: She could've had the best scenario possible!
Gordon: The second time in 3 weeks that would have happened between this version
and the Prime Time Version. And of course, she had the $500,000, leaving
$404,000 on the table.
Don: I still can't believe she stopped so soon.
Gordon: For the record, that's now FIVE people who
had and sold or gave away the $500,000 case in 90 episodes. That's 1:18, which
is over the average.
Chico: Just goes to show you that even when you can play the game... you can't.
Gordon: It boils down to the fact that you have to
make the same move when the lights are on you as you do when you're watching it
at home. Not everyone can do that.
Chico: Isn't that always the case? And yet, this version of the show is better
than the primetime version... Why?
Gordon: It focuses on the game. When you think about
it, the Speedround version of the game is better than what we've usually seen,
just because it focuses on game, and not filler.
Chico: And yet, that in and of itself just contributes to the whole... gimmick
aspect of the primetime version. Here's an idea.... one guy, 26 cases, and $1
million... and just play, you know.?
Don: I like that idea. You think the executives at NBC would like that idea?
Gordon: You mean...like actually.. play a game?
Chico: Yep. Weird, ain't it?
Gordon: ...and who would watch that?
Chico: Well, no one's watching the ultra deluxe
versions we've been getting this season so far.
Gordon: Have they been watching Jeopardy?
Chico: Oh yeah. You can't go wrong with Jeopardy!
Gordon: And David Skaar can't go wrong with
Chico: Nope. Let me set the scene.... $102,000... in
three days... and in those three days, he's had three lock games. The one time
he didn't have a lock game... he ended up losing it. Let's punch up the clue,
huh? The Final category is "World Currency"...
With inflation raging there at more than 2.2
million%, this nation issued $100 billion notes in 2008.
Chico: 30 seconds...
Don: *Looks clueless*
Chico: Responses, please.
Gordon: What is Tratolandia? :D
Chico: You suck, Gordon.
Don: What is, um, Fakolia? :P
Chico: You both suck. The correct response: what is
Chico: So David ends up with $104,000. Do we see him
Gordon: I think we should. I don't know if we will,
because he only won 3 shows, but he deserves to be there.
Chico: Oh yeah.
Don: Yep. I know I'd like to see him there. Great
Chico: Only time will tell, but hey, I wouldn't be
Gordon: I'll tell you something I was surprised
about. Gene Simmons.
Chico: What, you didn't know he was that smart?
Gordon: After he had to be saved in the first
question, no. When he didn't know that Idaho wasn't further north than Wyoming,
I thought we were in for along night.
Chico: Well it's telling that he went from that to $500,000 in the course of an
Gordon: He does get to $500,000, and like the other
celebrities who got there before him, quits because he didn't want to risk the
money for charity.
Chico: Good call. Here's the question on 5th Grade Science... Pencils up,
What element is represented by the letter K on
the Periodic Table?
Gordon: (locks in answer)
Don: *Locks in*
Chico: Answers, please.
Gordon: It would be Potassium
Chico: You both get gold stars.
Gordon: Yay. Gene stops. His wife knew it was
Potassium. Gene would have said Krypton.
Chico: heh... Shannon Tweed knows elements.
Gordon: She sure does. And Gene knows about The
Apprentice. Which means I'm sure he would know about an Apprentice clone called
The Money and The Power.
Chico: The show with 50 Cent.
Gordon: It is. The premise is that teams have
challenges. The winners decide who faces 50 Cent, who eliminates them.
Chico: That sounds familiar.
Gordon: It does, doesn't it? Now did you like it?
Chico: Well, we all know the premise works, because
it worked the last time...
Gordon: 2 teams, various tasks, blah blah blah.
Chico: But it seems like a money-making option for a
rapper who's run out of money-making options. You know what I mean?
Gordon: You may be right. Instead of giving them $100,000 of his money, he may
be better off by using the money for TV performance lessons. For starters, he's
completely out of his element.
Gordon: He can't articulate well at all in front of
the camera and looks as stiff as a board. Second of all, him and his 'assistant'
Yayo make the place less like a 'work environment' and more like a rowdy curse
factory. At least with 'I Wanna Work For Diddy', the tasks were job based and
based on actual skills you would need to work for Diddy.
Chico: I know.
Gordon: Here., we're talking about...leading a bunch
of people chained up?
Chico: Umm.. yeah... explain that one to the
parents, why don't ya.
Gordon: Explain to me how you can lead people in
chains by making them jog 5 miles and 1. make this relevant to business and 2.
not see any parallels to the fact that we just elected an African-American
president less than a week ago.
Chico: You can't, can you?
Gordon: If I want to make someone show their
leadership skills, no, I don't.
Chico: This is more like 50's plea for acceptance to
a crowd who's gone on to better things.
Gordon: In addition to this, we have a woman named
'Precious', who succeeds in getting into 2 fights and both times uses racially
inflammatory statements in doing so, once going after the unemployed
African-American male, and once telling an Asian contestant to do her nails.
Chico: Oh geez.
Don: You're kidding...
Gordon: So she's in the bottom 3. So is the person
who she got into the fight with, who also used racial statements.
Chico: So what happens next?
Gordon: So is the person who is the captain of the
other team who's only sin is that she didn't lead a group of people who jogged
for 5 miles quicker. By the way, she's Asian. So the person who leaves...is the
team captain who didn't cause any drama, leaving the people who are clearly
inept to do the job (but who are far more entertaining) in the house.
Chico: So it's your standard reality garbage.
Gordon: Anyone have a problem with this?
Chico: Self-defeating purpose.
Gordon: Here's what the show is telling me: 'I'm not
here to make a good show that's based on actual gameplay. I'm here to make a
drama-filled show, and if the right person happens to win it, so be it.' F on
Chico: Sounds good to me. F.
Gordon: Epic Fail?
Chico: Epic fail. Let's see... Curtis didn't sell
that well... 50 Cent Bulletproof didn't do so hot... And now this... Reaching
Gordon: No. Who's up for reaching for an island?
Chico: I am.
Gordon: It's time for the weekly installment of..
MORONS GONE WILD!
Gordon: This week's episode - Marcus.
Chico: Threw his game plan away... and ended up
getting voted off as a result.
Gordon: And for once, Sugar isn't the problem.
Marcus's biggest problem is that he was not ready for a tribal switch.
Chico: One of the things about Survivor is that you
have to be ready for anything.
Gordon: And even if he was, he said a number of
stupid things. He told Suzie that she wasn't safe, which lead her right into the
arms of Ken and Crystal. At Tribal Council, Bob said that them voting off Dan
was the wrong choice. For someone who is trying to stay in the majority, telling
the switch vote that she was the wrong choice to stick around is not the
smartest thing in the world to do.
Chico: You think so? =p
Gordon: I do. And Marcus, by his lack of gifted
tongue, talked himself right off the island.
Chico: I guess when you have nothing left to go on,
you go on... the truth?
Gordon: That's a different show with Mark Wahlberg.
This is called The Moment of Say Anything to make sure you're not leaving. And
since Marcus didn't follow the rule, he's off to Moron Island to hang out with
Dan, Ace and company.
Chico: And yet, here we are?
Gordon: Yes. The hamsters created their own Exile
Island. Complete with Wood Chip Bed and Water Pool.
Chico: .... I hate to think of what that alcove in
the far corner is made of.
Chico: That's why I hate to think of it.
Gordon: What about thinking about this: Roll That
Beautiful Brain Footage.
Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your
frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico
Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)
Chico: Thanks, Doug. First up, Gordon?
Gordon: First up, we've got some dates for you.
It's Sci-Fi week as Chase (November 11) and
Estate of Panic (November 12) show up on the Sci-Fi Channel. Blush also shows up
on November 11th and Top Chef NY is on the 12th. On November 15...The Meow Mix
Game Show (Shudder)
Chico: Again... Cats? REALLY?!
Don: I still can't believe they went forward with
Chico: I had to give that one to Alex when he
interviewed Chuck. =p
Gordon: I'm sensing another Epic Fail around the
Chico: You know me, I'll give it the benefit of the
doubt based on certain criteria.
Gordon: It's debuting...on a Saturday night. If
that's a sign of GSN's confidence of the show, we have reason to worry.
Chico: Speaking of GSN, another date if you will...
Monday is the premiere of season 1 of
Don: That I like.
Chico: Good stuff.
Gordon: great choice. They get a quality show
addition, and it's better than watching Regis for the 564th time.
Chico: Nothing against Regis.
Don: Of course.
Gordon: Of course.
Chico: Meanwhile, I have a few notes of interest on
the Business End, starting with... Fox.
Fox has detailed its midseason plans regarding
new seasons of American Idol and Hell's Kitchen, as well as the burnoff of the
rest of Hole in the Wall...
Gordon: Let's hear it
Chico: Okay, get ready...
American Idol will launch its eighth season
January 13 and 14. Hole in the Wall returns January 18 at 7p.
Gordon: 'Returns'? or 'Burns off'?
Chico: Can't it be both?
And Hell's Kitchen opens up January 29.
Gordon: Good luck to both shows.
Don: I'm surprised that they moved HK away from the
summer for 2009.
Gordon: I'm not. Hell's Kitchen is going to be a
ratings winner in that spot.
Chico: Oh yeah. That's gonna be huge. Of course with
the good comes the bad, as 5th Grader and Lyrics are off the schedule for the
time being. Both have full-season orders. My guess is that they're going to do
what they've done in years past and put them on during the summer.
Gordon: Possibly - or wait until after the holidays.
Without Idol, FOX's Fall and Winter schedule is a mess.
Chico: And in other news of the obvious =p.
Meanwhile, in the file marked "They Greenlit That?"...
CMT has ordered a third season of "Gone
Chico: Cast includes George Clinton, Tara Conner,
Taylor Dayne, Micky Dolenz, Sheila E, Richard Grieco, and Justin Guarini.
Gordon: Richard Grieco?
Chico: Richard Grieco.
Gordon: Tara Conner?
Chico: Tara Conner.
Gordon: And they do what exactly with music?
Chico: Grieco's a musician. Tara Conner... not so
much. This of course from the Press Release.
Gordon: ...ok then
Chico: So take that for what you will.
Gordon: I can take blackboards for what they are
Chico: .... you were just REACHING for that segue
weren't you? =p
Gordon: ...yes. So go make another segue
Chico: .. I can't. Just go with it. =p
Are You Smarter Than...The So-Called 'TV
Authority Experts' in the past week of Inside the Box. You would THINK that
these people, during 'TV Authority Week', would be authority, right?
Gordon: Ummm...wrong. Here's some grizzly stats for
you. Big Bored please?
The Authority... of What Exactly?
- Eight out of 24
- All three finish in the negative
- 1 for 4 in the Bonus Round
- $6500 out of $46,000
Gordon: 1. The 'Authorities' in the regular game
are a combined 8 out of 24 - not exactly a good record.
Gordon: 2. Included in that round - the first
All-Skunk episode where no one gets anything right and go a perfect 0-6.
Gordon: Which also gives us..#3.Our second game
where all 3 people finish in the negative.
Chico: Oh dear.
Gordon: #4. Bonus Round? Ha. The Authorities are 1
out of 4 in the Bonus round. And the 1 win is worth..$1,000.
Don: That's just... sad.
Chico: To say the least.
Gordon: And finally...#5. Out of a possible $46,000
to be given out to the TV Experts, they manage to win...$6,500.
Chico: ... That's nasty.
Gordon: and what's worse is that $6,000 was
guaranteed minimum, which means that they only took $500 more than the minimum
Chico: Not very authoritative.
Gordon: No. Not at all.
Don: Rather embarrassing.
Gordon: So is this Haterade.
How do you get people to stop eating your food?
Mark it as your property by putting your bodily fluids in it.
Don: EEWWWWW! That was one gross episode, if you
Gordon: In The Ultimate Fighter, the people in the
Red Team get a taste of some special fruit...laced with pee.
Gordon: Then David Kaplan eats some sushi of
Philippi Nover's...with special sauce...mainly, Philippi's man-sperm.
Gordon: And then to add insult to injury, Philippi
makes David tap out to a rear naked choke in the first round. So David is
officially Felippe's woman - in every sense of the word.
Chico: Oh dear. Um... yeah, we can stop there if
Don: I'm feeling sick again.
Gordon: I do have the Fear Factor Chuck Bucket, if
either of you want it.
Don: *Throws up in the bucket*
Chico: And a double... *throws up* After all that, I
think we need to get fully loaded.
Gordon: I'll get the sake.
Chico: Sake it to me.
Games for your iPhone. Deal or No Deal's Million
Dollar Mission is coming.
Chico: On the one hand, it's Deal or No Deal, which
is always good as a standalone game format. On the other hand... It's the
Million Dollar Mission.
Chico: Asterisk city. Yeah.
Don: So many asterisks...
Chico: Well, it's something to do while you're
waiting to be cast, right?
Gordon: Sure - if you're a 21-29 year old male who
likes older women
Chico: Do tell
From the creator of "The Bachelor" comes the new
dating series "The Cougar." The search is on for charming, attractive
adventurous guys 21-29 who are interested in competing for the heart of a
successful, hot, older woman.
We will be traveling to Austin to cast for this
upcoming season and want to meet you.
Chico: Oh yeah, I remember this show....
Gordon: I know you want all of that
Chico: Of course, there's a case of better the devil
you know than the devil you don't....
How would you like to date Cindy Margolis?
They're looking for men of all types...
Chico: I don't know about you... but I could
totally go for all of that.
Gordon: Go for it! And while you're doing that I'll
go for some Media Hoes
Chico: *plays "Pimpin' All Over the World"*
In this week's Hodometer, Nathan Thomas wins Top
Design 2, Kendra Wilkinson (Celebrity Rap Star) gets engaged, Marcia Wallace
(Match Game) will play a The Pacific Palisades... Matt Vasgersian goes to the
MLB Network, Regis Philbin gets a new Live contract, and Mark Burnett teams up
with No Good TV...
Gordon: But none of them are your Hoes of the
Gordon: This week has a common theme - getting
dumped. We start with Deanna dumping Jesse because Deanna thinks she has a
career in Hollywood.
Don: Oh my.
Chico: Then... Wait... Wait... Don't tell me...
Simon Cowell's GF Terri Seymour wants the ring and the babies. Simon Cowell
doesn't... hence, therefore, and for that reason...
Gordon: ... Simon Cowell also getting dumped
because he doesn't want to have kids. You don't think that this has something to
do with the media, do you?
Chico: What makes you say THAT?
Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Chico: Heh. And finally, we're going Global... again
to the UK...
Celador is plotting a pilot where contestants are
hypnotized. The show is called "Mesmerized."
Gordon: Is it me, or does that just sound like
one of the dumbest premises you've ever heard?
Chico: It ain't just you.
Don: Are they going to get the contestants to act
like chickens or something?
Gordon: More like Jackasses...oh wait, that's the
people who'd be watching. And that's Brainvision. Shut it down.
Chico: Shutting down.
Gordon: When we come back, we play the stock market.
Chico: But I need my moneys. This is WLTI, give us
22 minutes, we'll give you a jackass.
Gordon: Hee Haw
(Brought to you by The Pick-Up Con Artist. Hey,
the economy sucks, so why not look for the person who can best persuade you to
spend your money? That is, unless they are already holding public office.)
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