The girls are falling for the geeks. Apparently being forced to spend time with the geeks ahs forced them to realize that the “geeks” (I know, no need for the quotes) are real guys just like the Abercrombie models (wait, did I suggest Abercrombie guys are real?)

Quickly, Bryan McFayden whisks off the competitors to a private room where they are informed of their next challenges. The Guys: Women’s fashion. The Girls: Rocket Science. Haute couture and nuclear powered transportation? Wow, the WB is getting a little hoity toity. Don’t worry, the culture is about to drop. And doing the honors of the buzzkill is NBA Dancer, Krystal! 

Awwww…..   Krystal’s bored. She doesn’t want to study rocket science because it is sooooo boring. Excuse, me, but Krystal, the next time you are offered a potential $250,000 to study something dull for a couple of hours, please don’t whine to America about it.

The rest of the girls are ignoring the rocketry loving the fact that tutoring the guys now gives them an extra excuse to spend more time in their closets. The guys are cultured in the stylings of Louis Vuitton purses and Stiletto heels. Like any true geek, these guys don’t care and according to Chuck they are, “absolutely astounded that there are people who actually took clothes this seriously.”

On the flipside, the guys are talking in way too big of terms in trying to explain rocket science. Bill goes as far as to refer to a parachute as a recovery device. Bill, the only thing these girls know about parachutes are parachute pants, and they like totally went out of style years ago.

Now we are treated to a heartfelt moment from Caitilin who tells us why she is trying so hard at this game. She says that she never really has felt that she was smart and that this is her opportunity to prove herself wrong. Mind you Caitilin, this is not the best competition to go against to measure your intellect. On an encouraging note, at least she is reading her book and not throwing it into the pool like Lauren.

Challenge #1: Rocket Science

All of the girls are given stations with all of the tools to make a simple bottle rocket and we’re talking the 2-liter bottle baking soda and vinegar kind. The first beauty to launch her rocket above the red tape about 20 feet in the air wins immunity for her team and the right to send one team to the elimination room. Couldn’t they come up with a more intimidating name than the elimination room?

Within 5 seconds it becomes clear who has a shot to win. Lauren can’t even attach the rocket’s fins while Krystal and Caitilin are the only beauties moving smoothly. Krystal out in the lead attempt to launch her rocket first and the white foam spray uncontrollably all over her (insert your own joke here) about ten seconds later, Caitilin is shaking her rocket and with a firm grip she plants it against the table allowing the white foam to shoot vertically launching her rocket to victory (again, insert your own joke here).

That gives Caitilin and Chuck 3 wins in a row and more importantly guarantees that they will be around for another week.

Challenge #2: Fashion Faux Pas

Later that evening the Geeks meet at the bottom of the staircase to hear that they are going shopping. Their fashion challenge will involve purchasing their partner 3 outfits, evening wear, casual wear and swimsuit. 

Very quickly the guys realize that they are screwed because they spent their time studying the knowledge of fashion and didn’t even know what their partners’ sizes were.

Richard while shopping tried to get around this problem by guesstimating that Mindi was “the female version of him.” No comment. (OK, comment. Why does this make me think back to Family Matters and when Steve Urkel would dress in drag and be Myrtle Urkel?  ….shudder.) Meanwhile, Chuck goes about using a different approach by asking the sales ladies what their measurements are so that he can estimate off of them. Surprisingly, none of the sales ladies seemed offended. I’m sensing a new pick up line. Hi, I’m a geek on a reality show, how big’s your chest?

There weren’t many other shopping highlights from the other guys so let’s go back to that constant fount of entertainment, Richard. Rich is seeking thongs. When shown where the thongs are he complains that the strip of fabric is too thick to be butt floss. As a result, he decides to find something in an animal print instead.

Back home from shopping the guys let the girls in on their little excursion but aren’t allowed to show the clothes yet. Everyone wants to know if they got the sizes right. By George, Chuck did guessing that Caitilin was a 6. However Richard is befuddled and thinks Mindi doesn’t exist when he find out that Mindi is a size 0. Apparently he though 2 was the smallest size and bought a 4 while 0’s are “almost negative.”

Scarlet probes Shawn about how sexy the clothing he bought for her is and Shawn is less than confident. Like a good cheerleader, Scarlet tells him that she is sure everything will be great. And with that we will move to the bedroom where we will get a little more of Scarlet.

Apparently, Scarlet’s back and shoulders are really tight so she asks Chuck to give her a back massage (Apparently, he won last week’s competition for a reason). Straddling Scarlet (yes, I said STRADDLING), Chuck works into her back like a pro and a few minutes later asks to slide down her bra straps. Apparently Chuck’s got game, and the bra straps come down. Then comes the Spanish, which apparent both understand. Scarlet asks if Chuck has had a girlfriend and he replies of course to which Scarlet asks if he has ever had a Latin girlfriend. Es muy caliente en la cama (It’s very hot in the bed!).  This all rolls into a deep conversation where Chuck professes his love to Scarlet saying that he can’t express his feeling very well but that he thinks she is the prettiest girl in the house (wonder if he waited until someone left to say this), and that he would like to spend more time with her. Scarlet sweetly accepted the compliment and accepted his proposal (had it been a real proposal there probably would have been a rejection, but this is reality TV where everything is always perfect, wait, isn’t that “Pleasantville?”

Challenge #2 Revisited: Runway Hijinx

To finally finish challenge #2, the girls will be modeling the outfits picked by their partners while expert judge who have styled the likes of Lindsay Lohan will dole out the final scores.

…And now, the first annual Beauty and the Geek runway competition!

Evening Wear

Lauren worked it in a brown dress with plunging neckline and starburst bedazzle that fit her like a glove. 

Mindi then came out in the same dress but in green and 2 sizes too big.

Scarlet sashayed a scintillating black dress, size 1 down the runway, a perfect fit with her body and her personality.

Krystal’s black dress clearly has come from the popular line of hefty cinch-sak as it has no place of the runway.

Caitilin comes out in a poofy pink pastel sundress with a sparkly black sweater shawl; an outfit a little overdone for the judges’ tastes.

Casual Wear

Lauren looks like she’s ready for summer vacation in her turquoise striped top and white layered skirt. Another hit with the judges.

Mindi’s pink and white top with jean skirt left something to be desired.

Scarlet perfectly squeezed into a teal top and jeans that hugged her body in all the right places.

Krystal looked much better in a tight brown tank and low-rider jeans

And then came the train wreck again, Caitilin in oversized brown corduroy pants with blue tank and pink sweater tie. Ugh.

Swimsuits!

Lauren is looking hot in a white floral bikini; once again the fit is superb.

Mindi came out in a leopard print string bikini that was so big it provided full coverage. It looked as if she had poopy in her pants. (She said it, not me)

Can Scarlet possibly go wrong in black two-piece that accentuates her flawless bottom? I think not. Shawn even said it inspired his “arousal factor”

Krystal is working the brown bikini with god ring clasp, but if she works it ay harder, her breasts are likely to pop out. Mind you, this isn’t HBO; we can’t have that sort of thing.

That is until, Choo! Choo! Here comes Caitilin in a bikini 3 sizes too small with her buttocks hanging out. Parents cover your children’s eyes or puberty may get a jump start.

Now for the Judges’ final decision. It’s Scarlet and Shawn! Lauren I’m sure was a close second and Caitilin a distant 5^th, maybe 6^th. That means Scarlet and Shawn along with Caitilin and Chuck from the previous challenge are immune, more importantly that means the massage oils will continue to flow for Scarlet and Chuck.

Three major things happen between the last challenge and the elimination.

1. Richard starts his stupid alliance act again and pisses Chuck off, again.

2. Chuck and Caitilin nominate Richard and Mindi & Scarlet and Shawn nominate Bread and Krystal.

3. Mindy spoons Richard keeping good on her promise from the first night, making Richard wish they were going to be eliminated more often.

In the elimination room the ladies are quizzed on Astronomy while the guys are quizzed on fashion.

How many times in a year does the earth travel around the sun? With a quick answer of 1, Mindi scores 1.

What is the event called when the moon passes directly between the sun and the earth and casts a shadow on the earth surface? Krystal answers lunar eclipse to which Brad points out that she was so close. Correct Answer: Solar eclipse. (You have to wonder if she would have gotten away with just saying eclipse). Score 1-0

What is the name of the famous comet that passes earth every 76 years? Another quick answer (Halley’s Comet) scores Mindi another point. 2-0

What star is closest to the Earth? With a guess, (a guess?!?) Krystal answers the Sun and gets on the board. Score 2-1

From which state are the space shuttles launched? Mindi answers Florida sweeping for 3.

What planet is named for the Roman goddess of Love and Beauty? Now Krystal, Jupiter?!?….hmm, don’t think that’s right Krystal. Try Venus, you probably shave with it.

This score at the end of the ladies quiz puts Brad up against the wall, he and Krystal down 3-1 to Mindi and Richard.

Brad is up first.

Name the 4 legged animals depicted in the trademarks for the following fashion lines: Lacoste, Le Tigre, Ralph Lauren. 2 out of 3 ain’t bad but it ain’t a point either. Brad knew Le Tigre was tiger and Ralph Lauren was a horse, but the Gator of Lacoste escaped him. Score stands 3-1

If Richard answers this next question right, Mindi and Richard win.

In the fashion label DKNY, the DK refers to what designer? With a long period of pensive thought (Thank you Captain Redundant!) Richard is only able to muster the answer Devon Klein. Donna Karan would have locked up the game. Still 3-1

Now Brad must answer correctly to stay in the game.

What upscale department store has the same name as a popular kids’ entertainment character? With no guess, Brad and Krystal will be going home, but don’t worry, Barney loves them.

And that’s it for another episode of Beauty and the Geek! Wait, that’s not it? What now?

Holy crap! Just before Krystal leaves, Richard plants a kiss on her. Lip to lip! He has now kissed his first girl! First base! His lips are de-virginized! Ok, well maybe that is going too far, but congratulation to Richard and Mindi for staying in the game and congratulation to Richard’s lips for getting in the game. Next week, the guys get makeovers, so expect the romance to heat up. See you then.