a Gaucho You Are!
PIT STOP: ESTANCIA SAN ISIDRO, OUTSIDE OF
drove up the Andes mountains into Argentina to do for river
rafting... except for Brain & Greg (Team Barroom Bros), who got
a flat while mountain biking on railroad track. Then they took
in a traditional Argentine barbecue... except for Rob & Amber
(Team Survivor), who couldn't stomach 4 pounds of meat but
managed to talk OTHER teams in to giving up after him. And they
all made their way to an Argentine ranch in the shadow of the
Andes... except for
Debbie & Bianca
(Team Well-Traveled Babes), who were eliminated after not
following instructions up the Andes (I knew
they shoulda taken that left turn at "Al Norte"). The WINNERS of
the leg were Lynn
& Alex (Team Fab Two)...
...and so at
3:49am local time, after
12 hours of
R & R at the ranch,
the two lovers rip
open the envelope and find that the first
clue of the fourth leg of the seventh Amazing Race is this:
Drive yourselves in a marked vehicle to the
small town of La Lunta (25 miles away) and look for a ranch
called Cabaña La Guatana to find your next clue.
You have $45
for this leg of the Race.
are happy to have beaten
everyone... but ESPECIALLY Rob & Amber. And they want to keep
the advantage. It's not a BIG advantage, though, because Uchenna
& Joyce (Team Will Race For Food) are a mere 18 minutes behind
them and they are as EQUALLY determined to win the money so they
can have babies.
As those two teams motor down the road at a SCREAMING 40mph, TWO
teams depart over an hour behind the leaders: Team Barroom Bros
and Ron & Kelly (Team American Beauties). The bros are sure they
can capitalize on their last-to-third
the last leg... and Ron, trusting military man as he is, finds
it hard to
NOT trust people in this game.
LA GUATANA, LA LUNTA, ARGENTINA
As the sun rises, Team Fab Two arrive at the ranch... which
doesn't open until 6:30am... a half-hour from when they arrive.
Fortunately, Team Will Race For Food
needs to stop for directions
and the other two teams are WELL over a half-hour behind. So
they wait patiently
minutes, walk into the gates and
find themselves stopped by
ROAD BLOCK (Who's
ready to horse around?)
member must mount a horse and then
complete in a traditional gaucho (Argentine cowboy)
challenge. The member must ride his/her horse around several
barrels and then ride back and lance a ring with a stick.
The player MUST finish the task in 40 seconds or less (a
competitive time for a gaucho) to receive the next clue.
S/he must continue trying until the gaucho by the ring
writes down a time of 40 seconds or less.
They're asking which of
two homosexuals are "ready to horse around"?!? That's a leading
question if I ever heard one! Anyhow, Alex decides to do the
"pretty" helmet and mount a horse... and I mean "get on
its back", you sickos!
As Alex starts the task, Team Survivor leaves the PIT STOP.
They're a little upset, having to take that penalty last leg,
but Rob says he works well under pressure.
Joyce chooses to ride for her team as Alex starts HIS ride...
and asks Lynn to back off. His first attempt is good... but not
QUITE good enough; he misses by one second. Alex is helped by
the fact that the horse Joyce chose is VERY wild... and even
bucks her off. As such, with Lynn cheering all the way, Alex
finishes in 39 seconds and keeps the team in the lead with this
yourselves back to Mendoza and to Mendoza Airport (about 25
miles away). There are two flights on Aerolineas Argentinas
leaving from there to Buenos Aires, Argentina: 9:30am &
2:30pm. Whoever checks in on the plane before it takes off
will on it. Once in Buenos Aires, take a taxi into the city
and find the Old English Clock Tower. A man dressed in black
is roaming around the tower and will give you your next
speed off to get on the early
flight, Joyce FINALLY gets her horse under control and starts
her first run. But, on the way back, the horse bucks her off
again. More than her pride is hurt as she takes a deep breath,
picks herself up,
dusts herself off and starts all over
Meanwhile, Team American Beauties get off at the right
exit... while Team Barroom Bros pull a "Debbie & Bianca" and
keep going. Thus, Ron & Kelly arrive at the ROAD BLOCK and
decide that Kelly will ride. As she and the horse get to the
course, Joyce tries one more time... and finishes in 37 seconds!
They leave the BLOCK in second.
As Brian & Greg make a U-turn, Rob & Amber are IN town... but
are STILL lost. And Kelly finishes the BLOCK in 39 seconds to
put them into third and on the first flight. As Ron & Kelly
leave, Brian & Greg arrive and congratulate them. Brian decides
on doing the BLOCK and finishes it in the fastest time yet:
33.75 seconds. They leave in fourth for...
MENDOZA AIRPORT, MENDOZA, ARGENTINA
As expected, Team Fab Two arrives at the airport first and
sign-up for the first flight to the Argentine capital city.
Uchenna & Joyce arrive behind them and likewise book their
flight. Ron & Kelly and Brian & Greg likewise show up... though
with less than a half-hour to spare.
Not too far FROM the airport, Ray & Deana (Team
On-Again-Off-Again) FINALLY leaves the PIT STOP, almost FIVE
HOURS after the leaders. Ray HATES being in the "bottom
feeders". Right behind them are Meredith & Gretchen (Team
Socially Secure) and, almost EXACTLY five hours after Team Fab
Two left, Susan & Patrick (Team First Mom/Son) depart.
Team Survivor suddenly STUMBLE onto the ranch by sheer accident.
At the ROAD BLOCK, Rob decides to ride... and he rides WELL! He
whips around those barrels and spears the ring in plenty of
time. They have 30 minutes to make the first flight or they'll
have to wait five more hours!
After checking their bags, four teams board the 9:30am flight.
They're happy to be in the front pack... especially since they
didn't quit on tasks like SOME of the teams. They all ate the
BBQ yesterday completely... something Rob & Amber failed to do.
And they are all HAPPY that Team Survivor will be five hours
...that is, until they actually SEE Rob & Amber boarding the
plane! They didn't open the door at 30,000 feet but all the air
was sucked out of the plane nonetheless. Had it been any other
team, they would've got applause... but all Team Survivor gets
as they take their seats is cold stares! Nonetheless, five teams
take off for Buenos Aires.
Now comes the part where we distinguish between a GOOD team and
a BAD team. A GOOD team (like Team Socially Secure) sees a young
juggler on the street and are moved that the boy is making a
living; they appreciate the culture around them. But a BAD team
(like Team First Mom/Son) sees the same kid... and yells at him
to get out of the way because they have a Race to win; they
appreciate nothing but the money!
Meanwhile, at the ranch, the three teams who SHOULD be on the
later flight start to arrive. First Deana decides to do it...
but her horse isn't CRAZY... it's just SLOW! And, of course, Ray
blames Deana for not pushing the horse enough and wanting to
quit and go home. As she keeps trying (and shoos Ray away
angrily), Meredith decides to ride. The two ride side-by-side
around the barrels... but Deana FREAKS when the horse nearly
bucks... and Meredith finishes in 36.12 to move into sixth. This
makes Ray even ANGRIER... and Deana even sadder!
And, when Patrick marches out onto the field, it's not much
better for Deana. However, after looking things over, Team
On-Again-Off-Again decide that her problem is being unable to
kick the horse to get it to move. So Deana removes her shirt and
wraps it on her stirrup. As she and Patrick ride side-by-side,
Deana puts the "spur" to the horse and lances the ring... in 33
seconds! They leave in seventh... and Patrick has to try several
times before he finishes the task in last.
Needless to say, all three teams make the second flight to...
BUENOS AIRES, ARGENTINA
In the city which literally translates to "Good Air",
the first plane lands at 11:30am. Five teams head down to the
baggage carousel... and Team Survivor leaves there first as they
grab their bags. Team Barroom Bros, Team American Beauties, Team
Will Race For Food and Team Fab Two leave in that order, grab
cabs and haul.
But it's Rob & Amber who find the clock tower, discover the man
wandering around it... and purloins him of:
train to the city of Tigre (means "tiger", about 20 miles
away). You can catch one at Retino Train Station. Once
there, find docks at 700 Lavalle to find your next clue.
Fortunately for Rob & Amber, the train station isn't very far
from the tower. So they hoof it to the station. They get on...
but they must wait ten minutes for the train to leave. That's
enough time for Brain & Greg to find the man near the tower and
get to the station. Ron & Kelly are right behind them and both
hop on the train. Uchenna & Joyce and Lynn & Alex are a little
further behind but they, too, ride that train to....
Ten Americans file out of the train and jog towards the docks...
which, likewise, are close by. But while some lose their way,
Lynn & Alex are the first to the:
DETOUR - Shipwreck or Island?
task, you must choose a boat and driver and head along the
SHIPWRECK - You must search a seven square-mile area among
many shipwrecks for the one in the enclosed photo (which is
30 years old). If you find it, shout and someone aboard the
wreck will give you your next clue.
ISLAND - Using only the map enclosed, you must make your way
to the San Antionio River and find the island that is
marked. You may NOT show the driver the map. Once you find
the island, you must both get off the boat and go to the
Route Marker to get your next clue.
Team Fab Two chooses ISLAND while Team
Survivor chooses SHIPWRECK. They get into their boats and take
off in opposite directions. Meanwhile, the other three teams
discover that they're on the wrong side of the river and run
towards the DETOUR. Team Will Race For Food and Team Barroom
Bros take SHIPWRECK and Team American Beauties look for the
"HOLY CANNOLI!" shouts Rob as the floor of their raft snaps in
half! But they keep going, looking for the wreck. Lynn & Alex
likewise get water in their boat... but trudge on. But it's Team
Survivor who locate the boat and grab the last clue of the leg:
ROUTE INFO - PIT STOP:
way back to the dock and travel by taxi to the next PIT
STOP: La Martina Polo Ranch in Vicente Casares (the most
prestigious polo club in the country, about 35 miles away).
WARNING: the last team to check-in may be ELIMINATED!
They head back... and will probably take great
pleasure in knowing that Team Fab Two's boat is literally
falling apart. As they wait for a replacement, the other teams
look for... whatever they're looking for. It's Team Barroom Bros
who find the clue second and try to catch up to the slow-moving
Team Survivor. Rob & Amber make it back first, though... and, in
gratitude, Rob gives the driver his Red Sox cap (relax, Bahstin
fans; it's not like he can't afford MORE of them, right?). The
brothers are right behind the reality-show veterans en route to
the polo club.
Back on the river, Lynn & Alex's boat gets replaced. However,
according to the "Rules of the Race", no time can be given back
for such an unfortunate incident. Ron & Kelly are the first to
the island and third to get the PIT STOP clue... followed
closely by Uchenna & Joyce. Nothing in the rules say that you
have to stick with the DETOUR choice you make... just to find
the next clue. So they're fourth outta there. Lynn & Alex are in
fifth as they find the island and the Route Marker. They all hop
in cabs and head for...
PIT STOP: LA MARTINA POLO CLUB, VICENTE CASARES, CHILE
In the place where horses and mallets reign, Team Survivor find
themselves in familiar territory again. They are the first team
to be Team #1 twice in this Race. And host Phil Keoghan, the
local and the horse they local rode in on greet them on the mat
and hand them a London vacation thanks to the Roaming Gnomes at
Travelocity. They feel GOOD! They strategized to stay out of
last in last leg... and had the guts to fight adversity to win
THIS leg. Brian & Greg arrive as Team #2, happy to be moving up
On the highways, Ron & Kelly's taxi is going slow... and Lynn &
Alex's stops for directions. Uchenna & Joyce's, however, is
tight on and moves the couple into third. Ron & Kelly are Team #
4 and Lynn & Alex are Team # 5.
Uh,... wait a sec... aren't there EIGHT teams in this Race right
now? Oh, yeah... the three on the way-later flight.
Said flight arrives in Buenos Aires at 4:05pm and the last three
teams file out. They get into cabs and head for the tower. Ray
REFUSES to lose to two supposedly "weaker" teams... but he &
Deana are thwarted by a weaker cabbie. As such, Meredith &
Gretchen are first to the man in black the clue within... and
they hop the train to Tigre THREE MINUTES before it departs. Ray
& Deana, however, aren't THAT far off course and manage to hop
the train just before it pulls out... leaving Susan & Patrick
behind. Of course, Team First Mom/Son don't KNOW that the others
are ahead of them and, when they get into another train some
minutes later, they think they're ahead since nobody else showed
At Tigre, Team Socially Secure take a cab to the dock while Team
On-Again-Off-Again hoof it. About 10 minutes later, Susan &
Patrick jog to the docks. All three reach the DETOUR and all
But Team First Mom/Son has one of MANY crappy boats as the
engine breaks down. This puts them in last. Gretchen is looking
for a STAR, not for the river sign... and that puts Ray & Deana
back in front. They pass by Team Socially Secure en route back
with the clue... and Gretchen tells the driver to follow them...
AWAY from the clue! While THIS is going on, Susan & Patrick get
a replacement boat... but Patrick has already given up all hope.
By the time Meredith & Gretchen find out that they're going the
wrong way, they had almost LEFT the river. But, with Gretchen
saying an "Oh, God" mantra, they get to the island and leave the
DETOUR in seventh. Susan & Patrick (with Pat still talking in
the negative), find it and leave in last. Susan still has hope,
though... especially with Team Socially Secure stopping to find
out where the cabs are.
Team On-Again-Off-Again arrive on the polo field in the twilight
as Team # 6... just RELIEVED they beat the "old folks".
The night falls, the lights near the mat go up... and a cab
arrives. The male and female within get out, jog to the mat and
"Meredith & Gretchen,... you're Team # 7!" And, man, are they
Patrick's worst fears are realized as he and his mama hit the
mat about ten minutes later. They ARE last... and they ARE out.
Patrick's pessimism is too much for Susan's optimism...
and she cries. But Patrick is proud that they made it this far.