PIT STOP: ESTANCIA SAN ISIDRO, OUTSIDE OF MENDOZA, ARGENTINA

The Racers drove up the Andes mountains into Argentina to do for river rafting... except for Brain & Greg (Team Barroom Bros), who got a flat while mountain biking on railroad track. Then they took in a traditional Argentine barbecue... except for Rob & Amber (Team Survivor), who couldn't stomach 4 pounds of meat but managed to talk OTHER teams in to giving up after him. And they all made their way to an Argentine ranch in the shadow of the Andes... except for Debbie & Bianca (Team Well-Traveled Babes), who were eliminated after not following instructions up the Andes (I knew they shoulda taken that left turn at "Al Norte"). The WINNERS of the leg were Lynn & Alex (Team Fab Two)...

...and so at 3:49am local time, after 12 hours of R & R at the ranch, the two lovers rip open the envelope and find that the first clue of the fourth leg of the seventh Amazing Race is this:

They are happy to have beaten everyone... but ESPECIALLY Rob & Amber. And they want to keep the advantage. It's not a BIG advantage, though, because Uchenna & Joyce (Team Will Race For Food) are a mere 18 minutes behind them and they are as EQUALLY determined to win the money so they can have babies.

As those two teams motor down the road at a SCREAMING 40mph, TWO teams depart over an hour behind the leaders: Team Barroom Bros and Ron & Kelly (Team American Beauties). The bros are sure they can capitalize on their last-to-third momentum from the last leg... and Ron, trusting military man as he is, finds it hard to NOT trust people in this game.

CABANA LA GUATANA, LA LUNTA, ARGENTINA

As the sun rises, Team Fab Two arrive at the ranch... which doesn't open until 6:30am... a half-hour from when they arrive. Fortunately, Team Will Race For Food needs to stop for directions and the other two teams are WELL over a half-hour behind. So they wait patiently for 30 minutes, walk into the gates and find themselves stopped by a:

They're asking which of two homosexuals are "ready to horse around"?!? That's a leading question if I ever heard one! Anyhow, Alex decides to do the "pretty" helmet and mount a horse... and I mean "get on its back", you sickos!

As Alex starts the task, Team Survivor leaves the PIT STOP. They're a little upset, having to take that penalty last leg, but Rob says he works well under pressure.

Joyce chooses to ride for her team as Alex starts HIS ride... and asks Lynn to back off. His first attempt is good... but not QUITE good enough; he misses by one second. Alex is helped by the fact that the horse Joyce chose is VERY wild... and even bucks her off. As such, with Lynn cheering all the way, Alex finishes in 39 seconds and keeps the team in the lead with this next clue:

As they speed off to get on the early flight, Joyce FINALLY gets her horse under control and starts her first run. But, on the way back, the horse bucks her off again. More than her pride is hurt as she takes a deep breath, picks herself up, dusts herself off and starts all over again.

Meanwhile, Team American Beauties get off at the right exit... while Team Barroom Bros pull a "Debbie & Bianca" and keep going. Thus, Ron & Kelly arrive at the ROAD BLOCK and decide that Kelly will ride. As she and the horse get to the course, Joyce tries one more time... and finishes in 37 seconds! They leave the BLOCK in second.

As Brian & Greg make a U-turn, Rob & Amber are IN town... but are STILL lost. And Kelly finishes the BLOCK in 39 seconds to put them into third and on the first flight. As Ron & Kelly leave, Brian & Greg arrive and congratulate them. Brian decides on doing the BLOCK and finishes it in the fastest time yet: 33.75 seconds. They leave in fourth for...

MENDOZA AIRPORT, MENDOZA, ARGENTINA

As expected, Team Fab Two arrives at the airport first and sign-up for the first flight to the Argentine capital city. Uchenna & Joyce arrive behind them and likewise book their flight. Ron & Kelly and Brian & Greg likewise show up... though with less than a half-hour to spare.

Not too far FROM the airport, Ray & Deana (Team On-Again-Off-Again) FINALLY leaves the PIT STOP, almost FIVE HOURS after the leaders. Ray HATES being in the "bottom feeders". Right behind them are Meredith & Gretchen (Team Socially Secure) and, almost EXACTLY five hours after Team Fab Two left, Susan & Patrick (Team First Mom/Son) depart.

Team Survivor suddenly STUMBLE onto the ranch by sheer accident. At the ROAD BLOCK, Rob decides to ride... and he rides WELL! He whips around those barrels and spears the ring in plenty of time. They have 30 minutes to make the first flight or they'll have to wait five more hours!

After checking their bags, four teams board the 9:30am flight. They're happy to be in the front pack... especially since they didn't quit on tasks like SOME of the teams. They all ate the BBQ yesterday completely... something Rob & Amber failed to do. And they are all HAPPY that Team Survivor will be five hours behind them...

...that is, until they actually SEE Rob & Amber boarding the plane! They didn't open the door at 30,000 feet but all the air was sucked out of the plane nonetheless. Had it been any other team, they would've got applause... but all Team Survivor gets as they take their seats is cold stares! Nonetheless, five teams take off for Buenos Aires.

Now comes the part where we distinguish between a GOOD team and a BAD team. A GOOD team (like Team Socially Secure) sees a young juggler on the street and are moved that the boy is making a living; they appreciate the culture around them. But a BAD team (like Team First Mom/Son) sees the same kid... and yells at him to get out of the way because they have a Race to win; they appreciate nothing but the money!

Meanwhile, at the ranch, the three teams who SHOULD be on the later flight start to arrive. First Deana decides to do it... but her horse isn't CRAZY... it's just SLOW! And, of course, Ray blames Deana for not pushing the horse enough and wanting to quit and go home. As she keeps trying (and shoos Ray away angrily), Meredith decides to ride. The two ride side-by-side around the barrels... but Deana FREAKS when the horse nearly bucks... and Meredith finishes in 36.12 to move into sixth. This makes Ray even ANGRIER... and Deana even sadder!

And, when Patrick marches out onto the field, it's not much better for Deana. However, after looking things over, Team On-Again-Off-Again decide that her problem is being unable to kick the horse to get it to move. So Deana removes her shirt and wraps it on her stirrup. As she and Patrick ride side-by-side, Deana puts the "spur" to the horse and lances the ring... in 33 seconds! They leave in seventh... and Patrick has to try several times before he finishes the task in last.

Needless to say, all three teams make the second flight to...

BUENOS AIRES, ARGENTINA

In the city which literally translates to "Good Air", the first plane lands at 11:30am. Five teams head down to the baggage carousel... and Team Survivor leaves there first as they grab their bags. Team Barroom Bros, Team American Beauties, Team Will Race For Food and Team Fab Two leave in that order, grab cabs and haul.

But it's Rob & Amber who find the clock tower, discover the man wandering around it... and purloins him of:

Fortunately for Rob & Amber, the train station isn't very far from the tower. So they hoof it to the station. They get on... but they must wait ten minutes for the train to leave. That's enough time for Brain & Greg to find the man near the tower and get to the station. Ron & Kelly are right behind them and both hop on the train. Uchenna & Joyce and Lynn & Alex are a little further behind but they, too, ride that train to....

TIGRE, ARGENTINA

Ten Americans file out of the train and jog towards the docks... which, likewise, are close by. But while some lose their way, Lynn & Alex are the first to the:

Team Fab Two chooses ISLAND while Team Survivor chooses SHIPWRECK. They get into their boats and take off in opposite directions. Meanwhile, the other three teams discover that they're on the wrong side of the river and run towards the DETOUR. Team Will Race For Food and Team Barroom Bros take SHIPWRECK and Team American Beauties look for the ISLAND.

"HOLY CANNOLI!" shouts Rob as the floor of their raft snaps in half! But they keep going, looking for the wreck. Lynn & Alex likewise get water in their boat... but trudge on. But it's Team Survivor who locate the boat and grab the last clue of the leg:

They head back... and will probably take great pleasure in knowing that Team Fab Two's boat is literally falling apart. As they wait for a replacement, the other teams look for... whatever they're looking for. It's Team Barroom Bros who find the clue second and try to catch up to the slow-moving Team Survivor. Rob & Amber make it back first, though... and, in gratitude, Rob gives the driver his Red Sox cap (relax, Bahstin fans; it's not like he can't afford MORE of them, right?). The brothers are right behind the reality-show veterans en route to the polo club.

Back on the river, Lynn & Alex's boat gets replaced. However, according to the "Rules of the Race", no time can be given back for such an unfortunate incident. Ron & Kelly are the first to the island and third to get the PIT STOP clue... followed closely by Uchenna & Joyce. Nothing in the rules say that you have to stick with the DETOUR choice you make... just to find the next clue. So they're fourth outta there. Lynn & Alex are in fifth as they find the island and the Route Marker. They all hop in cabs and head for...

PIT STOP: LA MARTINA POLO CLUB, VICENTE CASARES, CHILE

In the place where horses and mallets reign, Team Survivor find themselves in familiar territory again. They are the first team to be Team #1 twice in this Race. And host Phil Keoghan, the local and the horse they local rode in on greet them on the mat and hand them a London vacation thanks to the Roaming Gnomes at Travelocity. They feel GOOD! They strategized to stay out of last in last leg... and had the guts to fight adversity to win THIS leg. Brian & Greg arrive as Team #2, happy to be moving up the ladder.

On the highways, Ron & Kelly's taxi is going slow... and Lynn & Alex's stops for directions. Uchenna & Joyce's, however, is tight on and moves the couple into third. Ron & Kelly are Team # 4 and Lynn & Alex are Team # 5.

Uh,... wait a sec... aren't there EIGHT teams in this Race right now? Oh, yeah... the three on the way-later flight.

Said flight arrives in Buenos Aires at 4:05pm and the last three teams file out. They get into cabs and head for the tower. Ray REFUSES to lose to two supposedly "weaker" teams... but he & Deana are thwarted by a weaker cabbie. As such, Meredith & Gretchen are first to the man in black the clue within... and they hop the train to Tigre THREE MINUTES before it departs. Ray & Deana, however, aren't THAT far off course and manage to hop the train just before it pulls out... leaving Susan & Patrick behind. Of course, Team First Mom/Son don't KNOW that the others are ahead of them and, when they get into another train some minutes later, they think they're ahead since nobody else showed up.

At Tigre, Team Socially Secure take a cab to the dock while Team On-Again-Off-Again hoof it. About 10 minutes later, Susan & Patrick jog to the docks. All three reach the DETOUR and all choose ISLAND.

But Team First Mom/Son has one of MANY crappy boats as the engine breaks down. This puts them in last. Gretchen is looking for a STAR, not for the river sign... and that puts Ray & Deana back in front. They pass by Team Socially Secure en route back with the clue... and Gretchen tells the driver to follow them... AWAY from the clue! While THIS is going on, Susan & Patrick get a replacement boat... but Patrick has already given up all hope.

By the time Meredith & Gretchen find out that they're going the wrong way, they had almost LEFT the river. But, with Gretchen saying an "Oh, God" mantra, they get to the island and leave the DETOUR in seventh. Susan & Patrick (with Pat still talking in the negative), find it and leave in last. Susan still has hope, though... especially with Team Socially Secure stopping to find out where the cabs are.

Team On-Again-Off-Again arrive on the polo field in the twilight as Team # 6... just RELIEVED they beat the "old folks".

The night falls, the lights near the mat go up... and a cab arrives. The male and female within get out, jog to the mat and Phil says:

"Meredith & Gretchen,... you're Team # 7!" And, man, are they relieved!

Patrick's worst fears are realized as he and his mama hit the mat about ten minutes later. They ARE last... and they ARE out. Patrick's pessimism is too much for Susan's optimism... and she cries. But Patrick is proud that they made it this far.