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Episode 16.3
September 24
 Jason: Oh boy.
Gordon: I think I'll go see it.
Jason: Wow. If it's directed by Paul Andersen...heck yeah
Chico: I'm all about it. Welcome back to the big show. It's time for us to make
light of another big show as we play Paula vs. Simon.
Gordon: But are you all about being a judge?
Chico: All about it. You?
Jason: Yup.
Gordon: I can dig it. For example... Chico is Paula, Jason is Simon and the
topic is...
The Cast of the Current Dancing With the Stars.
Chico: Oh my! This is the most talented bunch ever! and that they have so little
time means that they have to be extra dedicated! I'm a fan.
Jason: Oh Paula...who is the most famous one there...Wayne Freaking Newton. This
people couldnt get arrested in Vegas with OJ. The casting director couldnt get
anyone higher than the C list.
Chico: But they're not! They're dancing! And they're entertaining. You can't not
love that.
Jason: I am a fan of the show, but these people are nobodies. I mean Jane
Seymour...she could be my grandmother
Chico: Jane Seymour is not a nobody.
Jason: Jennie Garth. Floyd Mayweather? Come on, Paula, get real. Do you want to
see them in tights like Ryan?
Chico: No, you get real. Just jealous because they didn't ask you.
Jason: Oh. My. God. I would blow them all away.
Chico: You'd love to see yourself in tights.
*AIRHORN*
Chico: Word. This was going in a completely wrong direction :-)
Gordon: Next one?
Chico: Okay, Gordon, you're Simon. Jason's Paula, and the subject...
Survivor China, the lowest-rated debut for the franchise.
Jason: Oh my goodness...did you see the locale...this is the first time they are
in China! And the people there are so cute!
Gordon: You sure you weren't watching Kid Nation?
Jason: Those kids were so cute too. Come on...it's like they were playing
Western!
Gordon: I was watching a boring concept we've seen 14 times before as it
slouches to the worst ratings ever. The incredibly boring contestants who have
no clue how to play this game need to be fed to the Resident Evil zombie dogs.
Jason: No...you were seeing them parade around in China...they were doing Tai
Chi! Animal hater! Michael Vick Lover! Come on.
Gordon: I'm more of an original programming lover.
Jason: They were respecting the culture.
Gordon: I saw nothing exciting about China. What did it have that we haven't
seen before?
Jason: This is the first western reality program in China. I think that's cool.
Gordon: Maybe if they went to the back of the temple, they could find all of the
bodies of the dissenting protesters buried in the back yard.
*AIRHORN*
Jason: let me tell you. I am so SIMON in real life here. They are in DEEP
trouble.
Chico: Have to take some cred from Jason, because the first show to film in
China was actually Top Model. This was just the first FULL series. Okay, next?
Gordon: Next one - Jason is Paula, Chico is Simon and the topic is...
Jon Reep.
Chico: Oh dear. Oh dear... A winner of a show no one cares about.
Jason: Southern Humor --I love it.
Chico: I'm guessing you're going to be playing the Vegas strip within a year.
Becuase you're that forgettable.
Jason: Hey hey...look what happened to Dhat Phan and the other
guys...name...what was it again? They did ok!
Chico: The very fact that you can't remember John Heffron's name speaks volumes.
Jason: And Josh Blue is still touring...give the guy a chance.
Chico: I'll give him a chance. I'll give him a chance to get thrown off stage
five minutes into his set.
*AIRHORN*
Gordon: No love for Alonzo Bodden?
Chico: Uhhh...no. Bill Bellamy has potential, though. Heh.
Gordon: Next one?
Jason: That was fun. And yeah he sucks.
Gordon: Next one?
Chico: Next, Jason, how about you be Simon... And Mr. EZ2B-Good is Paula on
this...
Tyra Banks singing on a cruise ship.
Chico: Season premiere of ANTM, J.
Gordon: I just love to hear celebrities sing. I cover all of their shows. Tyra
is the bestest one ever.
Jason: Two words: Kevin Federline. Good grief Paula...you like everyone. Paris
Hilton. They cant sing ok. Would you buy Corey Clark's album?
Gordon: Is he singing a duet with Tyra?
Jason: No, no, no. Good grief. She makes Kathie Lee Gifford look good.
Gordon: Seriously, it doesn't take much to sing on a cruise ship. Just ask many
of the American Idolers. Tyra can sing like a bird - and she's better then
Britney.
Jason: My cat is better than Britney.
Gordon: The cat can probably lip sync better, too
*AIRHORN*
Chico: Probably a better dancer, too.
Jason: Yup.
Chico: Last one?
Gordon: Chico is Paula, Gordon is Simon, and the topic is...
The Bachelorettes revealed in the new Bachelor
Chico: Aww, 25 people looking for love.. So romantic.
Gordon: So...vapid. This is a bartender's dream, because they all look like
airheads.
Chico: Love makes you do strange things..
Gordon: There's already a report that the first episode features women who can't
hold their liquor. This should be called The Boozelor.
Chico: How's that different from the season when Byron won Mary?
Gordon: At least Mary has a brain. It may not be working all the time, but she
has one Vs. the 25 plastic Barbie Dolls we have on now.
Chico: But what are the chances that ... the Bachelor... and whoever will find
true love?
Gordon: The same chance that you'll have getting on Bratz 2: Electric Boogaloo.
Chico: I think it'll happen! ... and please don't remind me of the time I was
fired on Bratz. *starts crying*
*AIRHORN*
Jason: lol
Chico: I don't know how much longer I could've kept that up.
Gordon: The Bratz will win the Academy Award for Best Picture before those women
find love.
Chico: ... yep. Big Finish next.
(Brought by the Stinging Bee... It'... OW.... I mean, it's... OW!! OWWWW! I'm...
OWWW! Damn that hurts!)
Jason: Did you swing at the hive?
Chico: No.... Yes.
Gordon: When you did that, I was bee-wildered
Chico: That reminds me... Here's your honey for your biscuits... Can I see the
doctor now? I think I have an allergic reaction coming.
Jason: (hands you an epi pen) stab there
Gordon: And with that, we go to the Bee-ig Finish! Survivor - Chicken bought it.
is Ashley next?
Jason: If she doesn't pull her weight, yes.
Chico: Yep. Deal or No Deal... are we going to see a million dollar win before
they play all six cases?
Jason: I hope.
Gordon: No. As the sneak previews spoiled that possibility.
Chico: Thank you, NBC.
Gordon: Will we finally see some good winning love on Jeopardy?
Chico: I hope so. Those last few clues were ballbreakers.
Jason: Yup.
Gordon: Do we have any mail?
Chico: Sure do, and it's from Bobby McBride. Thanks, Bobby!
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To: WLTI
From: Bobby McBride
After what I heard about how this week of "Jeopardy!" went, I want to ask you
guys what you guys think was the worst week of "Jeopardy!" in the many years
you've been in existence?
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Chico: Well, I don't remember Jeopardy! being as bad as this, Bobby. So there
you go. This week... worst Jeopardy! week ever.
Gordon: I don't know if I can agree. It's been the worst in a while, but never?
no.
Jason: I agree with Gordon. This was bad.
Chico: In recent memory, yeah. I almost forgot about the times where we had a
0-0-0 tie. Sorry about that.
Gordon: Any more mail?
Chico: Nope
Gordon: ok - well if you want to send us some mail, what do they do?
Chico: you can 1) send us an e-mail to wlti@gameshownewsnet.com... or 2) visit
us at myspace.com/wltiongsnn. Either way, we'd love to hear from you.
Gordon: And with that, we end the show. Special thanks to Jason, Don, Ryan and
Alex for joining us. For everyone, this is Gordon Pepper, wishing you all a
pleasant Game Over.
Chico: And spread the love :-)
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