Episode 31.2 - Gone to the Dogs
September 17

Gordon: A dog hosting? Why not?
Chico: Not that Zero.



Gordon: ...oh.
Chico: But I betcha Rush will be a judge. Welcome back to WLTI. thanks for being a part of our weekend and allowing our weekend to be a part of you. Now it's time to inject a bit of culture, or a bit of counter culture. Welcome... to Gordon and Chico's Poetry Corner.
Jason: (snaps)
Chico: You know how this works, so let's go first to Gordon...  How would you like to deliver an ode to the AGT winners... Olate Dogs?

Gordon: To the Olate Dogs:

I think that I shall never see
A feat like scratching invisible trees
Or doing cartwheels in the air
And making millions of people care
The owners won't think it's so funny
As they cart off all that money
The only thing I ask, and it comes from my gut
Is it really that fun sniffing other dog's butts?

Chico: Heh.
Jason: Very good(snaps)
Chico: Obviously there's some fun from it. Why else would they do it?
Gordon: That's true, now Jason, I'm going to pull out my inner Tom Cotter.
Jason: Go for it
Gordon: Should I be nice...or mean?
Chico: GO FOR BLOOD! GO FOR BLOOD!
Jason: Why not...mean.
Chico: GO FOR BLOOD!
Gordon: Ok Jason..., Give me a 7 line stanza on the benefits of being slimed.

Oh Nick, thine Green Goo is legendary...
Whether if you miss a clue, scratch a nose, or just breathe the air...
You fall faster than the rain in Spain
And make teen stars of your channel thick with your green goodness
And of course when the big day arrives when you salute the famous...
It makes all feel good when you can slime people like Justin Bieber and Tom Cruise...
And not be arrested for it.

Jason: (Thank you) :-)
Chico: *snaps*
Gordon: Nicely done.
Jason: That wasn't easy BTW.
Chico: Okay, I'm ready for mine
Gordon: Now Chico - I'll give you the same option. Nice or mean?
Jason: GO FOR BLOOD! GO FOR BLOOD!
Chico: ... why not. Mean me.
Gordon: Ok Then. Give me a Haiku on why WIlliam Close is a singing act.
Chico: you suck.

Earth harps on their own
Voices amplify beauty.
William needs the votes.

Jason: (snaps)
Chico: *bows*
Gordon: Very cool. Now give one to Mr. Block.
Chico: You're going to love this, J... It's beat poem time.
Jason: What does that mean style wise?
Chico: Free verse with ... some rhythm,
Jason: Gotcha
Chico: you remember "The Revolution Will Not Be Televised"?
Jason: Sort of
Chico: you remember "Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen"?
Jason: Yes.
Chico: Something like that. The subject... the feeling of getting someone to the top of "The Pyramid".

Time is fleeting
What is a minute?
The clock ticks
The words appear...is there fear?
NO...your mind associates with the other, you get in sync,
you link with each other
tick tick tick
The words get harder
But the minds get together, the words flow, the pyramid gets shorter and shorter until...
ONE.
ONE clue, one more sync
One more time and then...
JOY, HAPPINESS.
MONEY. LOVE.
LIFE.

Jason: (bows)
Chico: .... Revolution. :-)
Jason: I have to admit, that wasn't bad.
Chico: No it wasn't.
Gordon: That was cool. Now Chico has got something for me.
Chico: I do. You're going to get your Bard on. Shakespearean sonnet. The subject... the Big Brother Final Three.

Bubble Bubble toil and trouble. Ian is stuck against the double.
Doth brains that kept him in the game but breathy could extinguish his flame.
But Jezebel is also in a bind, for the veteran dragon has towed the line
For the Daniel come out of the broth and I fears that he will eat them both.

Gordon: Done.
Chico: Very good.
Gordon: I have the last one and it goes to Chico. Now I will once again give the option of Nice or Mean again...but Jason gets to decide.
Jason: Lets end on a nice note.
Gordon: ...you're such a wuss. Ok Chico. Nice it is. In the style of Christina Aguilera's 'Genie in a Bottle', give me a song on your favorite new Summer show.

I wear a green t-shirt it's very tight, they send me to a ship to stay overnight...
Waiting for someone... to free me...
I try my best to sneak on the deck but there's a big guy with inhuman pecs. Maybe maybe maybe....
Oh oh oh.... My partner's saying let's go...
oh oh oh... But the guard is saying no...
If I want the money prize, baby there's a price to pay, I'm a player on the Great Escape and I think I'm on my way
If I want to win the cash, to make my wish come true, I gotta meet Rich Eisen on the dock, before I get the boot.
I'm a player on the Great Escape baby... my partner says I'm fat and lazy...
I'm a player on the Great Escape baby... come come come on and break me out.

Gordon: I'm impressed. This is my reward for being nice.
Chico: That was harder than it looks.
Gordon: (snapping ovation)
Jason: (snapping ovation)
Chico: .. I can't wait until the podcast. =p
Jason: You are going to have to sing this :-)
Gordon: That was excellent.
Chico: With half voice too. Wonderful.
Gordon: And you may love this just as much.

(Brought to you by Kentucky Fried Tarheels O-Fer Holes! This week's Flavor: Tampa Bay Twist. It has a combination of 5 fruity flavors that remind you of the beach - which is probably where the Carolina Panthers thought they were playing this week. That's Kentucky Fried Tarheels: Rameses done right!)

Chico: I have to give it to the Bucs. Their defense figured Cam Newton out.
Gordon: You lost. At home. To Tampa.
Chico: How does that happen. Anyway, let's get back to the show. We're going to run out the Push or Flush...
Gordon: They better beat New Orleans, or the next 2 months will have O-Fer hole commercials.
Chico: It's not improbable. Okay, we're going to move like lightning here...

	THE CHALLENGE: BATTLE OF THE SEASONS MTV - 10p ET Wednesdays
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PASTRY
	PASTRY	PUSH	JIGGLE

Jason: I haven't cared about this show for years. Why should we. JIGGLE.
Gordon: Because the show works and you're compelled by the personalities. PUSH
Chico: Obviously it still has some legs or else we wouldn't be talking about this at this point. PASTRY. Next...

	DANCING WITH THE STARS ABC - September 24
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PASTRY
	JIGGLE	PUSH	PUSH

Chico: Hey look! An All-Star season! You can watch this. I'm watching The Voice. Jiggle.
Gordon: It's the all-stars. Whoopie. Push.
Jason: You have to push this...even though this is desperation. PUSH
Gordon: This is probably the most half-hearted Push I have ever given a show.
Chico: Me, on the other hand, I'm keeping it real. DWTS is going to have a challenge on their hands, not just with NBC, but with a resurgent CBS comedy block. PS Barney's half-sister is the Mother. :-)  JUST SAYING. Next...
Gordon: I'm keeping it real also. This will get eyeballs. That being said, if they don't get better celebrities, this is the beginning of the end for the DWTS franchise.

	LET'S MAKE A DEAL CBS - September 24
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PUSH
	PUSH	PUSH	PUSH

Chico: Easy. PUSH.
Gordon: Let's make a PUSH
Jason: One of my favorites. With chemistry, an Emmy Nomination, and just a great show...you have a MAJOR PUSH from me.
Chico: (win cue) Now for its sister show...

	THE PRICE IS RIGHT CBS - September 24
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PUSH
	PUSH	PUSH	PASTRY

Chico: Drew's on his game. Everything's coming together. PUSH.
Gordon: I'm looking forward to this season. PUSH
Jason: But it's NOT THERE YET. I am sorry. There are days when it's PAINFUL to watch. PASTRY.
Chico: Next...

	CHEF RACE: UK VS. US BBC America - September 29
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PUSH
	PUSH	PUSH	PUSH

Gordon: This looks cool also. I'll watch., PUSH
Chico: Of course you'll watch. It premieres out of Doctor Who. That's a PUSH right there. We'll see what happens when you put it on its regular home at Tuesdays.
Jason: Great marketing. PUSH.
Chico: (win cue) Great stuff happening from BBCA. Now if you'll import The Chase. Just saying. :-)
Gordon: PLEASE put it on BBCA. That, Only Connect, etc.
Jason: Pretty Please.
Chico: Next...
Jason: A Saturday Game Block would RULE.

	THE AMAZING RACE CBS - September 30
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PUSH
	PUSH	PUSH	PUSH

Gordon: ONe...two...three...
Everyone: PUSH
Chico: Again... Easy. the $2 million twist is going to work.
Gordon: Best reality show on the air right now.
Chico: 9win cue) Last four.

	HALLOWEEN WARS Food - October 7
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PASTRY
	PUSH	PASTRY	PASTRY

Gordon: It's a fun show. and I liked the creativity. Pastry.
Jason: Same here. Not enough for a full push. PASTRY
Chico: Agreed. And Justin's coming into his element. PUSH.

	INK MASTER Spike - October 9
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	JIGGLE
	JIGGLE	JIGGLE	PASTRY

Jason: Not my cup of tea, again...good, but not good enough. PASTRY. Keep the drama away and concentrate on the designs.
Chico: This is where we may have a problem.
Gordon: Too much drama for me to endorse this. Jiggle.
Chico: Because there's going to be a live final. And AMERICA will be the last judge. I mean, it's a step up from the last season in terms of performance, but the drama is bringing it down. JIGGLE. Next..

	TOTAL BLACKOUT Syfy - October 29
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	JIGGLE
	PUSH	JIGGLE	FLUSH

Chico: Good show can only get better in season 2. PUSH.
Gordon: It ran out of gas for me in the middle of the run. I need new stunts. Jiggle.
Jason: Sorry...this is a one trick pony. FLUSH
Gordon: PONIES!
Chico: And finally...

	VIRAL VIDEO SHOWDOWN Syfy - October 30
	CHICO	GORDON	JASON	PASTRY
	FLUSH	FLUSH	FLUSH

Chico: Kevin... stick to asking America questions. FLUSH.
Gordon: Um...no. FLUSH
Jason: NO NO NO NO.....FLUSH. Hey
Chico: One.
Gordon: TWO
Jason: THREE
Chico: PLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNGE!
Gordon: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Jason: Stinky.
Gordon: And we go to break.
Chico: Speed Round next!

(Brought to you by the GSNN UK Saturday Morning Game Show Lineup. Starting with Countdown at 8, Only Connect at 9, Divided at 10 and The Chase at 11am. Come on BBCA. Do it for us game show geeks out there.)

Chico: Remember how much fun Weakest Link was?
Jason: Do we have to beg?
Chico: Enemy Within? Without Prejudice? Gladiators UK?
Gordon: Millionaire
Chico: Remember how fun that was? Remember?! Almost as fun as a Speed round.... now!
Gordon: Remember when we used to do a Speed Round at the end of each show? Wait...we do it. Speed Round starts...now! Big Brother: Who wins?
Chico: Dan doubles down and doubles up.
Jason: Ian 4-3
Gordon: Dan 5-2 over Danielle
Chico: Dan over Ian, 4-3.
Jason: over Danielle BTW
Gordon: Any million dollar musical talent this week?
Chico: Not yet. Wheel spins out season 30. What do we have to look for?
Gordon: I think we get a million dollar winner on Wheel
Jason: This year probably.
Chico: It's gotta happen this year.
Gordon: Survivor this week: Do all of the 'celebrities'; stay intact?
Jason: Yes.
Chico: Yep. Not one of them will win. Lisa will be lucky to make it to the merge.
Gordon: I don't think they win - but I think they stick around for a while. Any email?
Chico: Nope. You?
Gordon: Lee DiGeorge on our Facebook. Thanks, Lee.

/wlti.gsnn

“

Lee DiGeorge Curse of the Third Place Finishers? Season 1: All That, Season 2: Butterscotch, Season 3: Nuttin But Strings, Season 4: Recycled Percussion, Season 5: Fighting Gravity, Season 6: Team iLuminate, Season 7: William Close. Surprised?

”

Gordon: No. First of all, as those were Lee's Favorites, they weren't mine.
Chico: I had four of these things for favorites.
Gordon: With the exception of this season, I nailed the first 6 winners.  All of those acts deserved to finish exactly where they did - third place. And you could make a valid argument on why Close should have finished there also.
Jason: I forgot to ask...how do we grade AGT for the whole season?
Chico: Because he retreated.
Gordon: Honestly? C-. No stars this year at all.
Chico: AGT as a season... a bit of a miss. Yeah, we got a nice blend of talent but all of the hell we went through to get it. C
Gordon: And like all of the other 3rd placed finishers, I expect everyone here to fade into obscurity.
Chico: But we... will not.
Jason: Exactly. The only bright spot of this year...Howard Stern. C.
Chico: Thank you.
Jason: Gordon, you were spot on about him.
Chico: Now one question: who replaces Sharon Osbourne?
Jason: No one. She comes back
Chico: Cheryl Cole. Simon owes her one.
Gordon: I think Cheryl Cole shows up. I agree with Chico. Trivia Question. We all know Terry Fator was #1 in money generator from being on the show. Who's NUmber 2?
Jason: I don't know.
Chico: No idea.
Gordon: Alexis Jordan. Two #1 hits on the US Dance Charts and Triple Platinum in Australia.
Chico: Okay. time to close up shop. Remember to look for us on Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, email at wlti@gameshownewsnet.com AND the podcast on iTunes and at CLW83.com
Gordon: That ends the show. Special thanks to Jason Block for joining us.
Chico: Next week... Our Month of Awesome continues.
Jason: Love September. Its going to be great.
Gordon: LOTS of premieres. You may have to pick us up with a spatula when the show is over.
Chico: That's next week... For this week... for Gordon Pepper, for Jason Block... for everyone at GSNN... I'm Chico Alexander. Game over... and spread the love. :-)