"Show 106" -
September 1
This week we get no opening
gag, just a down and dirty intro. This should definitely
be down and dirty, as our challenger is Kenan Thompson
(yes, THAT Kenan, from Nick's Kenan & Kel, Fat Albert,
SNL, and previous acting co-host of Nick Cannon). We're
also going to get dirty with the Pussycat Dolls. Nick's
crew to get dirty with will be Affion Crockett, Rasika
Mathur, Katt Williams, Mikey Day and Leonard Robinson,
while Kenan gets Nyima Funk, Rob Hoffman, Joshua Funk,
Darrel Heath and Spanky Hayes.
We start with the 'World's Worst' (Think of Whose Line
Is It Anyway, because that's exactly what it is). We get
the World's Worst Tattoo Artist. Kenan misinterprets Big
E. Smalls with Big E's Balls (DING, 1-0, Black). For an
NBA Owner, Katt does his best Jerry Buss L.A. Laker
impersonation (DING, 1-1, TIE). For marriage counselor,
Rob tells Kenan to take a break and do a movie with
Angelina Jolie (BUZZ). For a phone sex operator, Affion
does it as a guy with a voice box (DING, 2-1, Red). For
a steroid youth counselor, Mikey and Josh do a before
and after sketch (BUZZ). For a Suicide Hotline Operator,
Leonard does an answering machine impression (DING, 3-1,
Red). For a Victoria's Secret Saleswoman, Kenan paws
Nyima (DING, 3-2, Red), but the point isn't enough,
because the round is over and Red wins it. They take a
1-0 lead into...
...game #2. Star Sightings. It's time to go into the
crowd and find celebrities. Rob finds Ellen Degeneres...as
a man, who shockingly looks like her. Ack! (DING, 1-0,
Black). Affion finds a bald member of the Terror Squad
(DING, 1-1 TIE). Kenan discovers a mad in a red bandana
as Nate Dogg (DING, 2-1 Black) while Nick finds Erykah
Badu and Dane Josh (DING, 2-2 Tie). Josh finds a very
plump woman and calls her... Kenan Thompson? Wha?
(BUZZ). Red can take the win - and do as Nick gets Mario
from Super Mario Bros. (DING 3-2 Red). Red wins and
takes a 2-0 lead.
Black is going to have to win game #3 - Unhappily Ever
After - to even have a shot of beating Nick. The Red
Squad gets Little Red Riding Hood as the Black team gets
Goldilocks and the Three Bears. The teams have to improv
the fairy tale and bring it into the current era. Affion
narrates a court drama between Ms. Hood and the Wolf.
The wolf says that he gets blamed for everything,
including the 3 Little Pigs - but he's a Muslim and
doesn't eat pork - or meat, adding that what happened
between him and grandmother is no ones business. Miss
Hood claims that the Wolf ate her, but they depict Red
Riding Hood as a slut who gets eaten by all of the
woodfolk. Heh.
The Black team is up and we find that Goldilocks got
knocked up by one of the three bears - but she didn't
know which one was the baby's daddy. We turn into the
Maury Povich show as the Bad Ass Bears come out and play
around with the audience. Spanky gets fed on the floor
as the baby bear while Rasika talks about the
bears...uh...members as too big or too small. The father
isn't baby bear, papa bear...or middle bear, who claims
to love the baby, but then disowns Spanky immediately
after finding out. The audience votes for...The Red
team, who now has a 3-0 lead and it's the beginning of
the end for Kenan.
Time for a Cannon Commercial! This one is for a PPT -
Pre-Paternity Test. The hair from the woman will reveal
the father's name. I was expecting Maury Povich to be in
the commercial in some form.
Don't forget to see Nick Cannon's movie "Underclassman!"
Kenan is down 3-0, but he still has a glimmer of hope in
the WildStyle. The glimmer is fading when Spanky calls
him a buff J.J. (DY-NO-MITE!...but...BUZZ) and Mikey
tells Spanky to fetch his Twinkie (DING, 4-0 Red).
Spanky tells Affion that her a$$ looks like a bag of
socks (BUZZ - maybe Spanky should go out and find that
Twinkie) Affion tells Rob that he got his job off an
audition - and Rob got his in the dog-style position
(DING, 5-0, Red). Rob gets Black on the board with the
obligatory Christina Milian out-romance joke (DING -
maybe a pity ding, 5-1 Red). Nick calls Rob a bad actor
(DING, 6-1, Red) and the game gets called off due to the
mercy rule. This is the biggest rout of the season - and
perhaps ever.
Kenan gets a spanking. I wouldn't mind one
from...ahem...the Pussycat Dolls, as they sing... or
should I say Lip Sync quite badly...to 'Don't Cha'. Who
cares? You don't care about their synching as much as
you care about their...uh...assets.
Next week, we go fashion hunting and rapping. Join us in
7 days to see who is out beyond their curfew. |