GSNN Prime Recaps
InSites coming soon!
Numbers Game coming soon!
On the Buzzer coming soon!
State of Play coming soon!
We Love to Interrupt
The Video Wall
Game Show Lineup
12 Martha Stewart wannabes from the corners of the country try to outstyle each other. The prize - a contract from CBS, guaranteed television appearances and the chance at stardom.
Recaps by Julie Suchard, GSNN
Host: Joan Lunden
Judges: Candace Bushnell, David Evangelista, Bobby Flay
Creator: Larry Bleidner, Eric Schotz, Bill Paolantonio,
EP: Marc Summers
Packager: CBS Productions
Airs: Thursdays at 8:00pm ET on CBS
ALL ORIGINAL MATERIAL COPYRIGHT 1999-2005
GAMESHOWNEWSNET.COM. All rights reserved.
No infringement of copyright is intended by these fan pages; production companies of shows this site covers retain all rights to the sounds, images, and information contained herein. No challenge to copyright is implied.
Web design by Jason Elliott. Logo by Chico Alexander.
Swimmers and the Perfect Dinner Party - January 13, 2005
The teams are shown getting dressed. Tim, the only
obviously heterosexual male, is shown without a shirt;
almost, but not quite, a six-pack. Beaver Tim says that
his main focus is getting rid of the other team. He will
have little work to achieve this goal, since Team
Artisan, like the tapes on Mission: Impossible will
self-destruct in five seconds.
Joan Lunden, with hair looking stiffer than a President
with an intern hiding under his desk, introduces the
next challenge. She says that all great stylemakers know
how throw a great party and be a great host, so the next
test will showcase party skills. She shows an ornate
frame with a list of six options divided into three
sections that each team must choose from: "Red" or
"White", "Little" or "Big", and "French Inside" or
Since the Crafty Beavers won last week, they get to
choose first. They choose Red. Team Artisan chooses
Little next; obviously, size does not matter to them.
[Recall from last week: they didnt like having a strong
male member.] The Crafty Beavers choose American
Outside, allowing Team Artisan to French Inside (no
kissing involved, however). When the final choices were
recapped, Darlene squealed, not realizing that her team
had been screwed in all three of the choices.
Joan then translates what these choices mean to the
contestants. The Crafty Beavers will serve Red wine,
using the Big kitchen, at an American themed party
Outside of the poolhouse. They will have synchronized
swimmers as their entertainment. Team Artisan will serve
White wine, using the Little kitchen. They are to
serve a French themed dinner Inside the dining room.
They are lucky enough to get a mime as entertainment.
[Oh God! Not a mime
Each team will have 36 hours and $2,500 to prepare a
three-course meal for twelve people, the judges and the
team. [Wait! Isnt that 8 or 9 nine people, depending on
the team?] Judges will visit each party twice, for
drinks and appetizers, then later for dinner and
dessert. [They will probably visit the bathroom between
parties to purge.] The judging will be based on
creativity and presentation and taste of the food. For
their individual projects, each contestant will have $40
to buy supplies to create a gift bag for the judges.
The Crafty Beavers talk about their ideas for their
party. Mitch immediately throws out ideas. Mitch thinks
Kitsch, 1950s, and Thurston Howell. [Wait! Wasnt
the character of Mr. Howell created in the 1960s?] Amy
says that her group is full of people with big egos:
Mitch tells people what to do, Mychael controls the
Mitch wants to make deviled eggs as an
appetizer. Michael suggests the more exotic deviled
quail eggs instead, but the group doesnt agree with
Over at Team Artisan, Michelle takes control. She
volunteers to make killer lobster tails for the main
course. Margo would like to serve rack of lamb. Darlene
says that most chefs specialize: Michelle was a pastry
chef yesterday, but all of a sudden shes a regular chef
At Crafty Beaver lodge, Heather and Denise talk to the
synchronized swimmers. They tell them that they want to
make them fancy robes and make them do slave labor by
passing out hors doeuvres. Heather giggles about the
ooh laa laa flowered swim cap that she will be wearing
to the party. At Crafty Beaver lodge, Denise and Mitch
getting into a pissing match about the table covering.
At Team Artisan, Margo wonders if mimes have telephones.
Kimberly says that nobody likes mimes. [I am sure that
mimes do not like her much either.]
Michelle and Kimberly go shopping for food. [Didnt they
learn last week to never send Kimberly shopping?] Its
interesting to note that the lobsters Michelle picked
out were red, which means that they were probably
already cooked (or spoiled): does Michelle know this?
The Artisan shopping spree costs $1,008.07. Darlene
wants to go to the store too, but Michelle doesnt want
to let her go. Darlene also complains that nobody agrees
with her ideas. When Michelle and Kimberly return, its
obvious that they did not incorporate any of Darlenes
suggestions so she gets upset.
Beaver Mitch talks about his table cover. He places a
large plastic sheet on the table, which they cover with
rhododendron leaves applied with spray adhesive. Denise
attempts to center the table cover, which really bugs
Mitch. Catfight? Mitch says that Denise has made a lot
of decisions and he hasnt said a word about them, so he
wants to do his table. Denise says that she is not going
to give in to Mitch just because he is the loudest.
Denise is talking expressively with her hands while she
is cutting leaves from stems with scissors. Mitch says,
Would you please not point those scissors in my face?!
Denise retorts, Oh stop being a pansy! Good God.
Denise says that he is a moody snake. Mitch says that
Denise is a control-freak and if they lose the
competition, its because of her.
Michelle is doing a lot of the cooking and baking.
Michelle says that Darlene is doing the hors doeuvres,
but Darlene says that she didnt know about it. Darlene
and Michelle get into another pissing match. Darlene
wants Michelle to delegate, but because the team is
impressed by Michelles ability to cook French recipes,
she has little support. Darlene makes shrimp-stuffed
tomato appetizers, which, although attractive, are not
French. Will this come back to haunt the team? (Cue
Mitch continues to work on the table cover. He puts down
a layer of sheet-cork, followed by planters of wheat
grass in a line down the center. Looks nice.
Darlene sews napkins and a tablecloth. Dawn works on
boxes with pre-printed toasts inside. [How first-grade
teacherish of her.] Michelle works on her truffles, but
the butter was too hard, so she is using her hair dryer
to thaw the butter.
Mitch works on his individual project. He puts rocks and
goldfish crackers into plastic bags and calls them
fishbowls. [I think that my eight year old has done the
same thing. Wow, she must be a designer too.]
Kimberly makes a wooden box that she fills with
truffles. Mychael makes a red-white-and-blue colored
bucket and fills it with ingredients to make chili.
Denise has visions of the synchronized swimmers looking
like young, thin models in black stiletto heels. She is
disappointed when they show up, because they were real
swimmers [from the East German swim team, perhaps?] who
were somewhat overweight middle-aged women. But they did
wear black heels, even in the water.
With two hours to go, Michelles killer lobster tails
end up dead: a painful mushy mess. Darlene suggests
making a cream sauce to rescue the lobster meat, even if
the whole tails cant be served. She needed to make a
roux with butter and flour, but Michelle tells her there
is no more flour. She later finds a container of pastry
flour on the floor and realizes that Michelle lied to
her. Its a good thing that the group had racks of lamb
as a backup dish to use as a main course.
Here come the judges. Candace Bushnell, showing
remarkable restraint, left the fishnets and pimp coat
home this week. Instead she is wearing a remarkably
subdued peach sweater set and cut velvet trousers. David
Evangelista arrives, but Bobby Flay is late due to
The judges visit Team Artisan in the house for cocktails
and appetizers and are greeted at the door by the most
hyper mime ever seen. Both Candace and David complain
about the temperature of the Veuve Clicquot champagne.
David says that he is not being a pushy dinner guest
[but he is] and wont stop talking about the warm
champagne. Kimberly said that she chilled the champagne
in the freezer for an hour. As she says this, the judges
visibly cringe and give her a lecture about the Veuve
Clicquot champagne and how its a coarser champagne than
Dom Perignon or Cristal, and how it should be chilled in
an ice bucket. Kimberly says that she has drunk a lot of
champagne [Cold Duck, perhaps?] and it tastes fine to
her. She says that she doesnt like their dinner guests.
Darlene says that Candace and David are rude, but its
OK, because they are judges.
Candace asks about the stuffed tomatoes [her white trash
cuisine radar must have gone off], and more
specifically, if they are French. Darlene does her
little giggle act and trashes her team [again!], telling
Candace that they are not French. Michelle feels that
Darlene should support the team, no matter what and gets
upset. Darlene trashes Michelles menu. Candace points
out that the English use mayonnaise in their dishes, not
the French. [True, but weird considering that it was
invented by a Frenchman.]
The judges to go the poolhouse to visit with the
Beavers. Heather is dressed as Esther Williams. The
Beavers are serving apple martinis with ice in them. The
judges ask for their martinis with no ice. Candace tries
Mitchs eggs and hates them. The judges are further
annoyed when they sit at the table alone, because the
Crafty Beavers are all working in the kitchen. David
says that his scallop appetizer is cold and asks that it
be reheated. He and Candace watch the synchronized
swimmers do their synchronized thing.
Team Artisan serves dinner and dessert. Judge Bobby Flay
finally arrives and asks for left-overs from the first
course. He is told that he will get some, but is
displeased when he finds out that none are left. The
mime annoys Candace so she begs Margo to get rid of him.
Candace is served lamb and complains about how its
usually cooked to personal taste and shouldnt be served
at dinner parties. Both she and David say that they
cant eat the meat because its too raw. The judges
enjoy the dessert, three elaborately presented pastries.
The judges say that they enjoyed the company of the
members of Team Artisan.
The judges return to the poolhouse for dinner with the
Crafty Beavers, or, as Denise says, more abuse.
Mychael wisely saved some of her appetizer and offers it
to Bobby. Dinner of Beef Tenderloin, Mashed Potatoes
with a Corn and Green Bean Succotash impresses the
judges. Mitch seems disappointed when the judges tell
Mychael that the food is perfect. Heather tells the
judges that she might be able to beat Mychael in a
cooking contest. [Doubtful at best.] The judges are
offered Heathers chocolate cheesecake brownies for
dessert. David says that they are doughy and Mychael
smiles smugly. Denise and Amy complain about how tired
they are. Mitch says that he doesnt do foo foo
parties at home. He is proud of his white trash heritage
which involves moonshine and wiping your mouth on your
sleeve [and probably eating roadkill possum].
Its time for judges comments. David enjoyed hanging
out with Team Artisan. Candace says that she enjoyed the
décor of Crafty Beavers. Bobby says that everyone did a
The judges once again complain about the champagne and
tell the Artisans that they needed to get control of
their mime. Bobby complains that the group used an
Italian rice at a French dinner, while Darlene agrees.
Candace tells the Crafty Beavers that the sensed tension
within the group. Candace complains about the deviled
eggs, saying that they should have done quail eggs
instead [as Mychael had suggested]. Mitch stood up for
his deviled egg idea and says that he had no regrets
about serving them [good for him].
The judges, no surprise, pick Crafty Beavers as the
winner. The judges look at Team Artisans individual
projects and decide that the Dawns candle and framed
mirror is too common and could be picked up anywhere,
while the presentation of pastry chef Michelles
truffles also failed to impress. There were two
offerings of truffles, and Kimberly actually used her
carpentry skills to good effect by making a box for her
truffles. David said he would consider keeping and using
the box again, while all the judges agreed that
Michelles cheap cardboard box couldnt be used again.
At the rock garden, both Dawn and Michelle ask the team
to pick the person that they believe will help the team
the most. Margo votes to eliminate Dawn, because she is
a weak link. Darlene votes to get rid of Michelle
because she lied to her. Kimberly votes to eliminate
Michelle as well, prompting a shocked reaction from
Toms comment from last week: I probably shot myself in
the foot, but they probably shot themselves in the
head. Seems even more relevant this week.
Michelle says that she puts her best foot forward and
probably wouldnt do anything different.
Here is a link to the truffles that got Michelle
kicked out of the contest.
Next week the teams get evened up. Who will be
, sent to Team Artisan for the high-end
camping challenge? [High-end camping? Now theres an