Destination: Los Angeles. In a moment, people from all over Southern California are going to vie for a trip... back... to Southern California. And for the first time in Idol's history, the auditions have gone cyber, as a select few plucked from MySpace will join the proceedings.

LOS ANGELES
The Forum/AT&T Center

Victoria Garrett (21, Long Beach, CA) thinks that American Idol is in LA for a purpose. She thinks that she's going to be the next champion. We... think otherwise.

What about Tim Halperin (23, Fort Worth, TX), who has a crush on Jennifer Lopez. He sings "She Will Be Loved" for her to the point that Randy and Steven just didn't really feel like they were still in the room. At least he's going through to LA. Joining him, fellow UNC grad Justin Carter (27, Hollywood, CA), who apparently lacked balls.

Next up, Daniel & Isaac. Best friends... now bitter rivals. First, Daniel Gomez (18, Corcoran, CA) with "I'll Be" by Edwin McCain. Then, Isaac Rodriguez (18, Lemoore, CA) with "Build Me Up Buttercup". Neither of them are going through.

Day two begins with the MySpace auditioners, starting with Karen Rodriguez (21, New York City). Will MySpace produce where LA couldn't? Her song, "You Give Good Love" by Whitney Houston... had the spit, the fire, the spitfire, and the control. And apparently she and J.Lo met before on TRL. It's a three-way sweep.

Tynisha Roches (25, Hoboken, NJ) is sizing up her competition. And apparently she's in pain, because she can't stop saying "Ow". She does a tribute to Frank Sinatra, starting with "My Life". And if Simon was still on this show, he would've killed her three times. Things get mighty awkward when she chases Randy all over the room.

And we switch from singing to belly dancing? Heidi Khzam (23, Agoura Hills, CA) plays "Superwoman" by Alicia Keys.... and she's in. Easy.

Matt "Big Stats" Frankel (27, West Hollywood, CA) is the CEO of MSFP, Matthew Scott Frankel Produc...tions. He says that he's a force to be reckoned with. Uhh... okay.

William Roberts (24 Long Beach, CA) looks and sounds like Mike Tyson. Jeannette Manning (23, Trenton, NJ), looks like Pomplamoose, sounds like a flattened moose. And the less said about Daniel Hall (18, Oceanside, CA), the better.

Mark & Aaron Gutierrez (28/27, Redlands, CA) are next. Mark is a math nerd, while Aaron lives life by his own rules. They start with "Lean On Me". Great harmony, but this isn't X Factor, this is Idol. Only one of them can win. We'll see which one will go further in Hollywood.

We're running out of daylight on LA... and with scant exception, not a lot of winners coming through. Will Cooper Robinson be the exception? No, because he's 59.

And that'll do it for LA. Everyone sucked, except for the 30 who got through. We're hoping that the Golden Gate will make us feel a lot better about ourselves. SAVE US SAN FRANCISCO! Next time.