All-Stars/Finals - August 3
It's time for the big bad finale - The Undefeated
CPA's (7-0) will go up against the second seeded Barbell
Mafia (5-2). It's my team vs. the weight lifters team.
The tie is on, the banner is up, and we are all ready to
But before we rumble, we get the all-star game! Well,
that's a little wacky in the order, but here we go...
Team #1 - Friends of
Kel Waltrin - Curves of Steel
Tyrone Rush - Barbell Mafia
Billy Aquaviva - Sumo Storm
Tobias McKinney - CPA
Clay Krueger - Armed Response
Team #2 - Zach's Selwyn's Smoking Jacket Team
Kenny Sanchez - Stallion Batallion
Ben "Psycho" Toth - Ink, Inc.
Michael "Handsome" Costanza - CPA
Mark Pontius - SBD Mimes
David Benedetto - Armed Response
Interesting how Armed Response gets 2 guys in the
All-Star game - and they don't even make it to the
Round 1 - We get some nice catches, but it boils down to
Pontius vs. Rush... and Aquaviva? Pontius hits the
regeneration target. Rush's throw is caught by Toth, who
nails Aquaviva for the win. (Zach leads, 1-0)
Round 2- Bil's team comes out pissed, as they wipe out
Zach's team. Pontius is left all alone against Waltrin,
Rush, McKinney and Krueger. Pontius takes out Waltrin,
but he can't escape a double-team from Rush and Krueger.
Round 3 - The Dead Men Walking are Sanchez and Krueger.
Another dead man may be Costanza, who straddles Kel
Waltrin as he leaps over the line. Costanza gets back in
thanks to a Toth catch and everyone gets picked off one
by one. It comes down to Sanchez vs. Krueger. Sanchez
keeps doing what he does all season - he doesn't go for
the win. This time, Krueger victimizes him by hitting
the regeneration target. Sanchez once again doesn't go
for the target himself and once again gets stuffed by a
double-team. The Friends of Bil win the All-Star game
and a Sumo FINALLY wins something (Friends of Bil win,
The reward? Bil gets an Extreme Dodgeball t-shirt and
Zach's 6-week-old chewed up pen. That's love for you. In
ten minutes, someone will love $2,000 as we get to the
Tobias "Sniper" McKinney - Captain (6'5") - Can
throw the ball 50 mph and is in the Dodgeball movie.
Mandy Sommers (5'2") - Can throw the ball 29 mph
Michael "Handsome" Costanza (5'"10, 46 mph) -
Runs the L.A. Dodgeball Society
Steve Altes (6'0") 45 mph
Gretchen Weiss (5'2", 29MPH)
Barbell Mafia -
Tyrone Rush - Captain (6'0", 55 mph) - Former pro
Jeramy Freeman (6'0", 290) - Benches 650
Alan Grimes (5'10" 260)
Melissa Coates (5'5", 150)
Amazon Beard (5'5", 125)
The teams are playing for the Extreme Dodgeball Cup -
and $2,000 per person.
Round 1 - Grimes knocks himself out immediately by
stepping over the line. The CPA's use the same strategy
they did in the semi-finals as they get rid of Rush and
Costanza catches Freeman's shot. Beard gets
double-teamed out and Costanza nails Coates for the 5-0
By the way, the best kill of the year? McKinney's
suicide leap. The CPA's are going to take everything...
Round 2 - ...but will they take this round and the
match? It looks like it, as Freeman gets double-teamed.
Rush's shot bounced off Costanza and is caught by
Sommers, so Costanza comes back in, Altes is knocked
out, but so is Coates. Grimes takes out McKinney, but
Costanza takes out Grimes and only Amazon Beard is left
for the Mafia. Her throw goes at Sommers - and that's a
game ending mistake as Mandy catches the ball for the
championship (CPA's win, 2-0).
CPA'S WIN THE CHAMPIONSHIP! Whoopee!!!!!
The CPA's are awarded the trophy, which is a giant arm
holding a ball. Everyone comes out to congratulate the
CPAs as I am waving my banner and tie. That's it. Fade
My take? Well, as you all know, I really enjoyed this
show. This was fun and reminded me of the first season
of American Gladiators. You agreed with it, as this
recap is the most popular primetime show on this web
site. GSN knows when they have a hit, and they renewed
it in the middle of their run.
This wasn't perfect, but all of the pieces worked. Even
Jerri and Zach, when they got into it, worked out well.
Now if only they had funky stats and cooler graphics, it
would be perfect. I'll give Mindless Entertainment a B+
on this one, knowing that with more teams, a longer
season and more graphics, it can net an A.
Thanks again for reading the recaps, and we'll see you
in a few months for the second season.