January 16, 2005

Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and welcome to season 11 of WLTI!
Chico:  Hey there, I'm Chico Alexander, and this summer coming to Fox, Celebrity Synchronized Swimming.
Jason:  Fox will do anything these days to get ratings.
Chico:  And if they DO take this idea... I wouldn't be surprised.
Jason:  Hey maybe they can do a live version at the Burbank Pool on July 12-16 at GSC5?
Chico:  Don't give them any ideas!
Jason:  Hey, I tried to get a GSC Plug in early.
Chico:  One out of many. Because from somewhere in America... season 11 of WLTI ... is... what?
Jason:  ON!
Chico:  Correctamente...Welcome to the show called "a ticking time bomb in text form"...
Jason:  Who said that?
Chico:  Dan Berger yesterday. :)
Gordon: Let's meet the guests. First up, on vacation from destroying people on WPLJ, it's Jason Block. Now Jason, can you get a WLTI plug on WPLJ?
Jason:  When I get back in March, I will try.
Chico:  If Jason's got the gas, then America's favorite Canadian TV star Ryan Vickers must have the match.
Ryan:   Hey guys!
Jason:  Hey Ryan.
Ryan:   Feb 1st is the date for my reality TV show debut up here :)
Jason:  And for those who missed it...what's the show called?
Ryan:   "Skooled" - right now available in Canada only... but who knows... I heard they were trying to sell it overseas.
Chico:  I will pay you 75 cents for a DVD copy.
Ryan:   lol it's free. I can't sell something I don't own, right?
Chico:  In that case, I will pay you zero cents for a DVD copy :)
Ryan:   If you want to pay Shipping and Handling however... ;) Hey Gordon - does that mean I might become a media ho?
Gordon: You're well on your way. Now find a way to get on Canadian Idol.
Chico:  He did, remember?
Ryan:   They didn't take me!
Gordon: I mean really get on.
Ryan:   Too old now. 28 is past limit!
Chico:  Well, you can always emigrate =p
Ryan:   hmm...
Chico:  And last and certainly not least, the man that knows what a Magiranger is, Brian Moore.
Brian:  Well hello out there in Internet Land!
Chico:  Hello to YOU! What are YOU doing? (I know, so 2002...)
Brian:  I'm already back from Texas.
Chico:  Cool. Anyway, we have a lot to cover and not that much time, so let's get started with the first big J! champ of 2006... A writer from St. Louis... Tom Kavanaugh. Got the boot after eight shows, but left with over $110,000. In a word... *whistles*
Brian:  Awesome!
Jason:  'tis better to be lucky than good.
Gordon: He was lucky at the end, but he also played very, very well, especially at the beginning of his reign.
Jason:  True. But at the end he was lucky about 3-4 times in a row. Not the mark of a true champion.
Chico:  Question here: which do you think contributed to his long streak? His brains (which I'm sure he has), or his wife's lucky underpants?
Jason:  His Brains. He was a smart player.
Brian:  A little bit of the both.
Gordon: I'd have to go with the brains. He's a very good player. I think it was more fatigue that let him down in the later stages of his run.
Chico:  True, but you look at other champs like him, David Madden, Ken Jennings, Maria Wenglinski... you could never see fatigue starting to kick in with those three. With Tom, it's almost like the last few victories have been "Whew! I'm alive!"
Jason:  Agreed, Chico.
Gordon: I have to disagree - You definitely saw Madden deal with fatigue at the end of his run. He got very lucky in a few occasions.
Chico:  I know that it's almost a given that we'll see him in the next ToC... but how far will he get on his own power against those that came before him and those that have yet to play? I'm saying "not that far". I mean, he has the skills and the smarts, and he knows the game, but it's more of an endurance factor that'll do him in.
Ryan:   When is the next ToC going to be anyway?
Chico:  And I think the next TOC is going to be in May, judging from previous years.
Gordon: I think Kavanaugh can get past the first round, but he's going to have problems against Madden - or the man who replaced him, Kevin Marshall. How far is he going to go?
Jason:  Not far.
Chico:  Don't think Kevin Marshall will make the five. He's very young, he knows the game, but he'll run into more experienced competition.
Gordon: Will he do enough to get into the TOC?
Chico:  Really hard not to do enough nowadays, with revolving champs and all. Kevin Marshall isn't the only one with a coming out party from the past two weeks, isn't he, Gordon?
Gordon: No he isn't - joining him are a variety of shows that have decided to come out and say hi.
Chico:  Hi!
Jason:  (Waves)
Chico:  Starting with last Wednesday and "Biggest Loser: Special Edition"... Seems like it lacked the punch that the long-form version has.
Gordon: It's not awful, but you just don't get to know everyone as well, so it doesn't have that emotional bond that forms with the viewers.
Jason:  Jumping the Shark so to speak.
Chico:  I have to agree.
Brian:  They're screwed.
Gordon: I don't think it's shark jumping - but it will be if that's the permanent new form it wants to take.
Chico:  Seems like tacking the words "Special Edition" onto anything is a kiss of death. Just look at "The Amazing Race."
Ryan:   Agreed for the square.
Gordon: A 'Special Edition; is only good if it enhances the quality of the product.
Chico:  Otherwise it's another case of "Got Milk?"
Gordon: Pretty much. On the other end of the spectrum, who's up for Absolut Dancing With the Stars 2?
Chico:  Double shot, please. One for me, and one for my homeys.
Jason:  I love Dancing with the Stars 2, but I need to pour the gasoline on it.  Do I have permission?
Chico:  I love it, too, and I too have some fire about it. But I'll let you go first. The Chairman allows it.
Jason:  Ok, after Tatum O' Neal and her partner got hosed this week, and Master P for a second week got saved, I went to the ABC Message Boards.  I did see both dancing shows. I love my Stacy, but anyway, people are saying that the voting is rigged. After seeing two weeks of Master P being saved, I am not so sure they aren't...
Chico:  Funny, they said that last year. I don't have a problem with the voting.
Gordon: Me neither.
Brian:  The voting starts at the start of the show? WTF?
Chico:  Now THAT I have a problem with.
Brian:  Whoever made that decision should get hit in the groin.
Chico:  Now, class, what is the obvious problem with voting at the start of the show?
Jason:  The early dancers get the early advantage.
Chico:  Correct! Jason gets a gold star.
Gordon: Especially if any of them rips off a blockbuster performance.
Jason:  Such as Stacy Keibler.
Gordon: Where was Tatum O Neal positioned?
Jason:  She was last I think.
Chico:  I believe she was somewhere in the middle for the night, but in the bottom three score-wise. Dead last was Master P and Ashly.
Gordon: I think it could have been a factor - but her positioning was not why she was voted. And I don't think that Tatum got hosed. Actually, I called that she was leaving.
Jason:  So why is P staying?
Gordon: Look at the voting. Voting consists of 50% of the total score. The fact that Master P on the first show was in dead last, yet didn't finish in the bottom two means that he has a core of people who are voting for him.
Chico:  Let me guess, enough people who like to see cuties (Ashly) and people who just like to see the worst dancers survive?
Gordon: That's pretty accurate, Chico. Consider this the Bai Ling or Scott Savol effect. Master P has that block of voters firmly in his corner. Let's also look at it from a Chaos Theory perspective.
Chico:  I was waiting for that!
Gordon: Big Board Please.

Gordon: Chaos Theory - Demographics and what not lesson. Let's analyze who we have left
Jason:  OK.
Gordon: Drew Lachey - Hottie and beefcake who can dance. He's not going anywhere.
Chico: Agreed.
Gordon: Stacey Keibler - Hottie and babe who can dance. She's not going anywhere.
Jason:  She's winning the whole thing. (drool)
Chico:  Agree with Jason.
Gordon: Jerry Rice - Star Power. Can Dance. One of only 3 non-Caucasians. He's around for awhile
Jason:  He is not bad.  He will be around.
Chico:  Nope. I credit the years of footballing. Those guys have to be light on their feet.
Gordon: George Hamilton. Not as good as John 'O Hurley. Does have the star power. Should be ok for a while.,
Chico:  As long as his knees don't give out.
Gordon: Tia Carrere - She can definitely dance, but based on the popularity vote from week 1, she does not have as much of a strong fan base as we thought. She is clearly in trouble.
Jason:  Give her credit for dancing 2 months after giving birth. But she is definitely in trouble.
Chico:  You'd think she'd have the hips thing down...
Gordon: Master P - He can't dance. He does have a huge voting block. He's only going to get knocked out if he's at the bottom with people with a strong voting block as well (Drew, Stacey), he can survive for at least one more week.
Chico: Ok.
Gordon: Giselle Fernandez - WHO? I think the fact that she has been doing very well has rescued her, and maybe she can get a fan base, but she better get one quickly.
Jason:  Giselle Fernandez will be in the final two...mark my words. It will be an all female final.
Chico:  I still think Stacy vs. Jerry.
Gordon: But she is not the one with the biggest concern - LISA RINNA is. Not well-known? Check. Not dancing well? Check. Smaller voting base than Master P? Check. I think she has major issues if she is at the bottom with Master P next week.
Jason:  That I agree with.
Chico:  Oh yeah.
Gordon: So, to review...Safe - Drew, Stacey, Jerry, George. Trouble - Tia, Giselle, Master P. Out - Lisa.
Chico:  And Master P will get saved... again.
Gordon: Yep. You have 1 young male hottie, 1 athlete, 1 entertainer, 1 old male hottie, and 4 white (or close to it) female hotties. Still too many females.
Chico:  Back to Premiere City, though...Friday: another day at the ranch for Cowboy U, the show that seems oddly compelling, although it's really a one-trick pony.
Gordon: They don't shoot horse shows that fail to come up with new material, do they?
Chico:  ... as I thought. Harmless show, that Cowboy U. Monday: The Bachelor takes Paris... and not in the good way :)
Jason:  BOOOOO! You stink.
Brian:  Make it stop!!!
Jason:  The ratings suck. The show sucks...move on.
Chico:  Although if the Bachelor took Paris in the good way, it would be on the Internet by now :)
Brian:  LOL
Chico:  Thank you, I'll be here all week.
Jason:  No. Chico, because he wouldn't be the first or the last.
Gordon: Ouch.
Chico:  Tuesday: Distraction! Everyone's favorite bastard child of Jeopardy! and Fear Factor.
Brian:  Same craziness as before, with over $10,000 in prizes.
Chico:  Being blown to smithereens!
Brian:  Yep.
Jason:  No Destroyed truck.
Chico:  Not yet.
Brian:  I neglected to mention that.
Chico:  We have one destroyed Mac and one destroyed Vespa. And one dude with a tattoo.
Gordon: It was a cool tattoo.
Brian:  I'm glad it's not the "Wino Forever" one.
Jason:  Nice Johnny Depp reference.
Brian:  Thanx.
Chico:  Nothing says cool like Elvis. Also premiering: Anything to Win.
Jason:  GSN gets serious.
Gordon: I thought it was a decent starting effort. There was a lot of things that could have been improved, but it wasn't too bad.
Chico:  Agreed. But hey, it's a solid start.
Jason:  Anything that improves GSN I Am all for.
Chico:  A dying breed indeed. Then finally, Beauty and the Geek... the kids still love the geek. I, on the other hand, see it as suffering from "Average Joe Syndrome." And where the hell is Brian McFayden?
Gordon: Actually, I liked this version so far better than the first one.
Chico:  I mean, I like it, but I like the first one better.
Gordon: The first one was very pretentious to start. This one stripped all of that away and just gets right into the action.
Chico:  I like the pretentious! But hey, there's still time. And speaking of time, twice a year, TV writers from all across America get together in LA for the TCA Press Tour. The end result: networks unleash their plans and we get a lot of info about a lot of projects...
Chico:  Big Board: the Sequel, please?
Gordon: BIG BOARD!

Chico:  Subject: Writers' Block. First up: CBS has dates for season 9 of The Amazing Race and season 12 of Survivor.
Jason:  Survivor is being ballsy by starting during the Olympics.
Chico:  And airing during Dancing with the Stars.
Jason:  That should be a great battle.
Chico:  Ah, but yes. And Amazing Race 9 should wash the stink of the family edition out of our mouths.
Jason:  They didn't even mention it in the press release.
Chico:  Probably says something right there.. Remember what Tom Kennedy said: it's not what you say, but what you don't say. Also: Sci Fi is looking for contestants for two upcoming series: "Who Wants to Be a Superhero" and "The Gift."
Jason:  What's each premise?
Chico:  One looks for potential comic book characters. The other looks for psychics.
Jason:  Oh wow.
Chico:  Standard Sci Fi Alt-series...
Gordon: They both look cute, but I don't know how much of an audience it will attract. I thought Master Blasters was a great premise, but it didn't execute and it got yanked quickly.
Chico:  yep. Mad Mad House had the same effect.  Food Network announced the return of "The Next Food Network Star" in March.
Jason:  WHOO HOO...can I call this one now?
Chico:  Yes you may. And finally, the one you've been waiting for... it's GSN! We've got Bil Dwyer's "I've Got a Secret" premiering April 17...
Jason:  SUPER!
Gordon: Faaaabulous!
Chico:  We've got the Three Card Poker National Championship on April 17...
Gordon: Three Card Poker? Hate the game. Why televise THAT?
Jason:  Three Card Poker is a nasty game.
Chico:  Yes... yes it is. We've got Annie Duke Takes On the World on May 1.
Jason:  Annie Duke rules.
Chico:  We've got season five of Lingo on April 3. More Shandi talking!! yaaay!!!!!
Gordon: Muted. M-u-t-e-d.
Brian:  The $10,000 will become a rolling jackpot.
Chico:  Correct, Brian.
Jason:  Think we can get Ben's Battery again?
Chico:  Doubtful. We have Johnnie Cochran on Anything to Win on January 31. And we have Kenny vs. Spenny on Saturday... whoope..
Jason:  Kenny v. Spenny---please go away.
Chico:  AND! We have a February 12 marathon of the Newlywed Game and Love Connection. How about we see some of the Rod Roddy-announced shows for once?
Gordon: Could be fun to see
Jason:  Of course.
Brian:  It would be a great watch.
Chico:  With that, we're going to take a break. When we return, it's all the news we missed made entertaining by Gordon's witty repartee, and part two of Push or Flush.
Gordon: We get brainy - and then get Plungery - right after this!
Chico:  This is WLTI, the show your mother warned you about.

(Brought to you by the World Series of Pai Gow Poker. If you have to televise a new Gambling event, why not air something that you actually need INTELLIGENCE to play?)

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