Gordon: This is Gordon Pepper, and I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year!
Chico: Same from me, Chico Alexander!
Jason: Same to you and to everyone. Aren't we supposed to be off this week?
Chico: We're spending what would usually be our break week... not breaking. And you know why?
Gordon: Why, Chico?
Chico: Because we've got new product coming at a fever pace. Thanks, AMPTP! *comical wink, thumbs up*
Gordon: Yep. By the way, I got you both New Year's gifts appropriate for this week's show. For Chico, I got you the Cliffhanger's outfit from The Price is Right, because we'll be going to the highest of highs.
Chico: Snug-fitting lederhosen...
Gordon: For Jason, I got a miner's outfit, because we'll also be hitting the lowest of lows.
Jason: (switches on miners light) How do I look?
Chico: Like a mole. :-) And Gordon, I got you a trap door... just because it fits your personality :)
Gordon: Can I use the trap door to stick some really bad contestants on it?
Chico: Sure you can. A new year... a new beginning... and thanks to some gift cards I got over the holiday... a new graphics package... Same old open, though. From Somewhere in America, the first WLTI of 2008 ... is...ON!
Jason: Yes! Happy 2008!
Chico: We'll get to highs and lows in a moment. But first, hey Gordon... What can you get with $200?
Gordon: Up here, I can get a gallon of gas. In California, I can continue a Jeopardy win streak. And get a half gallon of gas.
Chico: Yep. And Yep. And Yep.
Jason: BTW...stay safe out there. Bad bad storms. Our California readers have been getting hammered.
Gordon: Stay safe out there.
Chico: Agreed. We begin the opening round with Jeopardy! champ and impressive head of hair Dan Pawson.
Jason: Dan is the best champ since Ken in my opinion.
Chico: I'm going to have to disagree there. He's certainly up there with Ken, but he has had his share of close calls, even more so than Jen Kennings.
Gordon: I'm going to disagree completely. Two words. David. Madden.
Chico: Point to Gordon for the correct answer.
Jason: Fine. Then put him behind David. He has the same style as David and Ken.
Chico: Now, there've been two matches this week that he could've LOST. The first was Thursday's show, when Jason Thweatt was giving our man Dan a run for his money. In fact, were Jason right, we would've been talking about the Final Jeopardy! round that did him in. Jason played the clue by the book (almost), and Dan, of his $17,800... bet only $799.
Jason: That I will agree with you with. This is where the Venus bet worked.
Gordon: Explain to those people who don't follow the planets what The Venus Bet is.
Jason: The Mars Bet is where you bet everything to win, no matter what the cost in Final Jeopardy.
Gordon: Mars being the God of War
Chico: The Venus bet is what lay-followers call "playing conservatively."
Jason: The Venus Bet is a protective bet where you are assuming your opponent will bet more and get the question wrong.
Chico: Wagering to minimize losses (thanks J! Archive) Dan here took the conservative route and a leap of faith that Jason completely screwed it. Little did he know... He did.
Gordon: And the Venus bet would have worked perfectly on Friday's show
Chico: Ah, the second instance when Dan could've lost. He picks the wrong time in his tenure to switch up play. Dan bet of his $15,000 $14,800 to cover challenger Martin Truong. Theoretically, he could've just bet $14,600 to tie him. That would've probably given us the first champ with two ties. Historic moment. Instead, he bets big... and so does Martin. Both ... are wrong. And Dan takes away $200. Would've benefited him more on THAT game to just lose. But he's eyeing the big prize. No idea what that is just yet, but he's eyeing it.
Chico: In contrast for a moment, the third player that game, Heather Chapman... completely... bottomed... out.
Gordon: I don't understand the challenger's betting. There's only 2 people betting, and you know Dan has to bet to cover you. This is the perfect opportunity to bet low.
Chico: But there's that flip side...If Dan is right, you're screwed no matter what.
Jason: Exactly.
Gordon: Right. But if you bet it that was, if you're wrong, you're screwed no matter what. So at least put yourself in the best position you can.
Chico: Precisely. So Martin's best move here... Probably a Venusian bet to minimize your losses. That way, if Dan covers you, you're the winner. IF he's wrong. If he's right... well, you got $2000 out of it, so what's the use in complaining, right?
Jason: You have the win
Chico: BUT. Should Dan have wagered low knowing his opponent just might've?
Jason: No way! I am a fan of the Martian or no betting philosophy. Win or go the hell home.
Gordon: It depends on the topic for me. If you see that it's not something you're good at, if the champ goes Venus bet, it forces the challenger to get the answer right.
Chico: So Dan played it right on Friday.. Thursday... not so much.
Gordon: You can argue that Dan played it right both days. What you can also argue is that the challenger played Friday awfully.
Chico: Which one? :-)
Gordon: Both. Continuing on a tangent, it was a bad week to be a game show contestant named Heather.
Jason: Oh yeah.
Chico: Yep.
Jason: This was a historically bad moment to be a contestant named Heather
Gordon: And if youre name is Heather McKeee, it's going to be a bad time to be reading this column, because we're about to break down your silly play. On Deal or No Deal this week, history has been made. Heather McKee is the first contestant to win...the penny case.
Chico: HA!
Jason: Wow. Wow. Wow.
Chico: I sense a big board coming.

Gordon: Lets go back to the last 8 in play Because we're going to use...poker strategy...on this segment of Professor Pepper's how NOT to play Deal or No Deal.
Gordon: Yes - Poker. something we didn't see in Duel. But we'll see it here.
Chico: Okay, Before we present the board... Caution...Pig tails do not work on everyone. Okay, now the board... Yes, friends, the million dollar mission is back
Gordon: Boooo
Chico: Okay, the next two picks... BOTH $1 million.
Gordon: Awwww

PENNY / $50 / $500 / $5000 / $10,000 / $400K

Chico: The offer drops from a very tempting $207,000...A considerable amount...To $45,000... Still considerable, given the board that remains.
Gordon: Now you can't win a million. BUT you still have the $400,000 up there. At the same time, Safety Net...all gone. You have to give serious consideration to take the deal. If $400,000 goes away, then there's at least 35,000 you won't see again.
Chico: $30,000 if you're lucky. The help, whose sole mission, I believe is to make for good television instead of a good game... I hate that... tells her to go one more time. So she does. Knocks off $500.

PENNY / $50 / $5000 / $10,000 / $400K

Chico: Banker generously raises the offer to... $71,000. A lesser person would flinch at that. Even if the banker is lowballing the offer a bit.. and this is a low ball... this is still good for the board she has.
Jason: I agree.
Gordon: It's only low by $8,000 - and if $400,000 goes away, then it's disaster.
Chico: She should deal, take the money, not have any regrets about this.
Gordon: Yes. I also think at ths point she's playing on 'Tilt'
Chico: Agreed.
Jason: Got to bring poker into it :-)
Gordon: Yep. She lost the million. She just saw $200,000 go off the table. The only way she sees dignity is to go all the way.
Chico: It's feigning strength to hide weakness.
Gordon: Its forcing her hand and playing everything. In this game, just like poker, to do that...not so smart.
Chico: A classic tell.
Jason: Exactly.
Gordon: So even with the millions gone, she still has some good money. Time to deal at $71,000.
Chico: Very much so. But after the break and a word from NBC News, Heather knocks off the $400K.
Gordon: Stop at a Landmine.

PENNY / $50 / $5000 / $10,000

Jason: And then it's game over.
Gordon: Yes, but even at Game Over, there's still $10,000 and $5,000 up there. That's decent money. Its not like the highest amount is $750.
Chico: Heather doesn't do that and as a result, she's playing felt with an offer of $2500.
Chico: And $2500 is a fourth of top money. The Banker's cutting her a break...and she doesn't even flinch. Again, thanks to the help. This is why people don't play poker in teams.
Gordon: As a pig farmer, you need to know how to cut your losses and cut bait. $2,500 is still a nice amount to buy a pig or too.
Chico: Or even a new pen.
Jason: Right.
Gordon: Or some grade A slop.
Jason: Right.
Chico: She plays on. Knocks out $50.

PENNY / $5000 / $10,000

Chico: Now she thinks that she's all that. She's riding the biggest roll of her life. It's still worth considering $4000. It's slightly less than arithmetic mean, but it's more than a third of top money. At this point, you could take that and be happy. Get a pot-bellied pig to interbreed with the rest of them. Make you some nice Tokyo X Pork. (Tokyo X being like our answer to American Kobe beef)
Gordon: Or a night to be high on the hog
Jason: (RIMSHOT)
Chico: Heather plays on. Heather knocks out $5000.

PENNY / $10,000

Chico: Final offer of the night.. $5500.
Jason: More than half.
Chico: At this point, the banker's saying "Take this and go home a winner."
Gordon: And $5,500 is a nice amount of pork.
Chico: The numbers do not favor Heather. She's giving up $5500 for a chance at $4500. That should be a red flags. That's a red flag... with sirens... and sparklers... and pig-shaped blimps saying TAKE THE DEAL!
Jason: TAKE THE DEAL! TAKE THE DEAL!
Gordon: (Gets on the Bullhorn...er...Pig Horn)
Chico: Husband says take it. Help says no deal. At this point, I'd just shut everyone out and go with my instinct. The banker's giving you a break. She says NO DEAL, citing that she came to make history. Well, Heather McKee... ask for what you wanted...GET WHAT YOU GOT. Literally and figuratively.
Jason: In her case....

PENNY

Gordon: So I'm guessing the pig farmer got...piggish.
Chico: *wah wah wahhhhh
Jason: She gets the penny and becomes the Robby Roseman of Deal or No Deal.
Chico: Yep. She pigged out there. And Howie, who told her she played a wonderful game, lied. She didn't play a wonderful game. She played a craptacular game.
Jason: She was being given signals all over the place. And she did...as Gordon said, play on DonD tilt.
Chico: Even the banker gave her a signal.
Gordon: Howie tried to make her feel better, but her chances of making a good deal went to hog heaven
Chico: At least she can put her winnings away in a nice piggy bank.
Gordon: What Piggy Bank, Chico? The banker broke it.
Chico: Oh yeah. Forgot about that.
Gordon: Heather can't even afford to buy a new piggy bank. The banker went hog wild on her.
Jason: Oh boy.
Chico: We're slipping into pun-off territory.
Gordon: Heather got...porked.
Jason: ENOUGH!
Gordon: I'm not allowed to ham it up a little?
Jason: This is too much spam for the readers, ok?
Gordon: I just wanted a discussion with some meat on it.
Chico: Okay, we've got more bacon to bring on here. So listen up or I'll kick your curly-tailed butts.
Jason: Got it.
Gordon: Yes, Daddy
Chico: Okay, while everyone else was watching Deal or No Deal anti-history being made, we get the return of one... two... three... FOUR favorites.
Gordon: Yay!
Jason: It was a fun week!
Chico: We're going to tackle them on one at a time, of course. First up, the season premiere of 1 vs. 100.
Jason: Battle of the Sexes.
Chico: 1 man... against 100 women... And then 1 woman against 100 men. Who is the Better Sex? That's... a different show.
Gordon: Well you knew the men had this one in the bag when we see the question that took the woman out...

A prime number is in the title of which movie?

a) Scary Movie 4
b) Ocean's 11
c) Police Academy 6: City Under Siege...

Chico: Mob, answer now.
Jason: B. Duh
Gordon: B
Chico: Of course. We're all sharing in $50,000.
Jason: Yay!
Gordon: A and C are both even, and hence are not prime, as they can be divisible by 2
Chico: 2, of course, is the only even prime.
Jason: Basic 4th grade math folks.
Chico: It was on 5th Grader not too long ago. And while we're on money, let's talk the money ladder...When Een Tegen 100 premiered... the money up for grabs was determined by a headache-inducing mathematical equation. I think it's on Wikipedia somewhere. 50,000 x n(missed)/n(total). When we got 1 vs. 100, it switched to a money-per-head formula. Now we have a more traditional Millionaire-type ladder. For every 10 people you knock off, you get a set amount. Good for the player... bad for the mob. And for me, at least, it just smacks of change for the sake of change. There wasn't really anything wrong with the old system, right? (This is where Gordon says "Except that there was.")
Gordon: Very good, Chico.
Chico: I'm learning.
Gordon: If you're a viewer, the old system was major wrong.
Jason: Why was it wrong?
Gordon: It made it a very boring game, because you knew that no one would go for the million. You're not going to risk $340,000+ to knock out 20 or 30 more people. Chico could tell you in the math formulas that risk > Reward. In this formula, it works, because you can't get the big money until you're heavily in the game and the temptation to continue is much stronger. The only thing I don't like is that you can stop at any time. I feel that if you say you'll continue, you have to play on until you get to the next money level.
Chico: In the old play-out, you can literally play as long as you're able, which makes a more heart-wrenching game.
Gordon: I don't want heart-wrenching. I want compelling and a chance for someone to win the million. I won't get it in the old version
Chico: Added the drama, and it was natural.
Gordon: The whole point of the game is to knock everyone out, or knock everyone out until you have enough money to stop.
Jason: So you like this money tree?
Gordon: A vast improvement over the old money tree.
Chico: That seems to be the fault of the players.
Gordon: It's the fault of the system. If you're telling me that 10 questions in, if I do nothing on the first 9 and then I knock out 40 with $5,000 a person and I have $200,000, and I need to knock out 30 more people to win the million, am I really going to continue? No. Of course not. The system is flawed and needed to be changed.
Chico: But did it need to be changed into this? I think it's just dumbing down the original formula... and if you remember so long ago, Mike and I had an issue with that. It's the same thing all over again.
Jason: Here's my theory.
Chico: Oh god, he has a theory =p
Jason: I think I agree with Gordon that the money tree had to be changed. Because no one was going for the Million. It's the same problem with Deal or No Deal.
Gordon: Right
Jason: People weren't going with their gut and either cutting out to early or staying too long (See Deal this week). This money tree, while being very millionaire like in it's construction, makes for compelling game play and, in this case...a million dollar winner. Case closed. Would he have gone for the million in the old tree? No. Because the Million dollar question was very tricky. And very clever.
Chico: Can we see that million dollar question?
Jason: Surely. Mob ready?
Chico: Ready

According to Hallmark, what holiday is the biggest card-giving holiday of the year?

A) Christmas
B) Mother's Day
C) Valentine's Day

Jason: Mob, Answer now.
Chico: B
Jason: Gordon?
Gordon: I'll say C, just to get a reaction from Jason.
Jason: Well, before I reveal the answer....Jason Luna had 15 women left....and in this case...every woman got the answer wrong. I personally said B. The correct answer....is...A. Jason locks in A...and beats the mob. Merry Christmas.
Chico: Ho ho ho, indeed... Santa's laugh, not a derogatory term for women.
Jason: Mother's Day is the number one day....for phone calls...according to AT&T.
Chico: So congrats to Jason Luna for doing what countless others could not. Except for maybe Larry Zerner.
Gordon: Larry won $250,000 in the last man standing match
Chico: Still, though. It's good to see 1 vs. 100 back.
Jason: Very much so.
Chico: It's also good to see Power of 10 back. Even if no one else thought so, thank you Howie Mandel
Gordon: Note to CBS. Sticking Power of 10 against Deal or No Deal: Bad. Keeping it there against both DOND and American Idol, which will be showing up: suicidal.
Chico: Me, I would kill for a better time slot. Drew and the other crew return for six shows, the first of which featured three players.
Jason: I liked what I saw. Nothing was changed.
Chico: Nope. Still the same as it ever was.
Jason: Except I would have liked to have seen returning champs. But that's my nitpick.
Gordon: No returning champs, but a lot of fun questions.
Jason: See, there was a perfect NY vs. USA question on the show this week.
Gordon: And almost a sense of Deja Vu. On the first episode of the new season, we had someone else see a Million Dollar Question. Let's see that MDQ...

What percentage of Americans think the Japanese are better at making cars than Americans?

Chico: You have a 10-point range. Your guesses.
Jason: I said 35-45
Gordon: I think I said 45-55
Chico: Tracy Meyer of Chicago... would've guessed 54-64. The correct answer... 46. Gordon would've had the million. Jason would've had $10,000. Tracy... also would've had $10,000, did she not take the money. Instead, she's $100,000 richer. This is your classic Pof10 question
Chico: One with a right answer and a "true" answer... and in the end, it ends up being more or less a wash.
Jason: My favorite question was the "Osama Bin Laden" question - as in if you saw him on the street, would you kill him.
Chico: I saw that. I thought about you guys actually.
Gordon: The one I thought that was most telling was 'How many people could say the names of everyone they slept with'
Chico: Classic question, there, Gordon.
Jason: Again...truth vs. what they would say to a pollster.
Chico: This is why it's so fun to watch this show.
Gordon: Exactly put. And something the contestants should have been thinking. The real question is 'How many people would admit to a pollster that they didn't know the names of who they were sleeping with'. For some of us geeks out there, we know who we've been sleeping with. Her name is Palmela.
Jason: And not to be sexist here...but both men and women have pulled the "complete stranger" routine.
Jason: EWWWW
Chico: Sorry, Gordon. It's Rosie Palm and her five lovely...
Gordon: So youre telling me you have a harem
Chico: Errr...anyway... going to the reality side, comes the return of The Biggest Loser. This time, we're all about spreading the love around with couples. Basically Biggest Loser meets Amazing Race... and you know what... I can dig that. There's an interplay at work among teams and against teams that makes Race work... same with this show.
Jason: Again, I like the concept of this show...and the couples thing works big here.
Gordon: I like the concept here as well. I don't think Jenni likes it as much, as her partner Lynn wanted out of the show.
Chico: Please do explain.
Gordon: Lynn lost almost 20 pounds and Jenni lost almost 10 pounds the first week - but they were in the bottom two. Lynn canvassed the other teams to vote them out, and the teams obliged, which pissed off Jenni big-time. As the show ended, Jenni thought that Lynn was never going to lose the weight, though he insisted that he would keep up his end of the bargain. As we see in the promos, he doesn't - Lynn loses a total of 3 pounds more since he left the show, and Jenni lost only 21 after that. It's a sad thing, especially as I can see other couples who probably wanted it more throwing items at their TV sets.
Chico: Oh yeah. I'd chew their heads off and follow it with a bottle of VitaminWater.
Jason: I love me the XXX water.
Chico: Lynn... that was just unnecessary.
Gordon: XXX rules. And so, as of right now, does The Donald
Chico: I have to agree here.
Jason: Celeb Apprentice was a fun surprise.
Chico: The Celebrity Apprentice is back... and for some, it's come full circle. We're going back to the less-as-Trump-would-have-it-is-more approach. We're going back to what brought him to the party to begin with. Simple challenges... High-tension moments. And toe-to-toe ego blows. That always helps.
Jason: Piers and Omarosa was priceless
Gordon: And amazingly enough, this show...works.
Jason: I was shocked as I was watching. I thought this was going to suck big time...it didn't.
Chico: It's Celebrities... It's The Apprentice... It's not supposed to work... and yet it does. Wow.
Gordon: And here's why it does - you have found 14 people who actually WANT to play the game. They aren't there to pick up the check. They are there to play and to be down and dirty. You can already tell with Gene Simmons and others that some of these people will pull out all of the stops. I believe I was the only one to push this. :)
Jason: Fine. You were right.
Gordon: Tee hee hee
Chico: Yeah yeah... whatever. Another point to this season's favor is the scaled-back simplicity. First challenge... sell hot dogs. That's it. Just getting back to business as usual.
Gordon: Simple is fun. What was also fun is to see the Celebrities use their status to help them win. I'm just hoping that not all of the challenges are going to be 'let's see who I know to help me win'.
Chico: In Tiffany Fallon's case... it came back to bite her. She was sent to the first Board Room with Carol Alt and Oma. Rosa. Tiffany thought she could save her most high-client of high-clients... Hugh Hefner... Tiffany's a playmate, y'all... for a later task. Donald called her on it, and immediately fired her for it.
Gordon: Well, the Donald was right. It's business. no punches are held. you can't save anything. You have to go with everything you've got.
Chico: You have a high hand, play it. Heh. There's poker again.
Jason: And Hef is a major playa you.
Gordon: And knowing Heffner, he may have helped with EVERY task, like what he did for Kendra Wilkinson in Celebrity Rap Superstar.
Chico: Granted, that didn't work out as well as we had hoped (sure she got to the last show... but do we actually want to HEAR HER?)
Jason: True.
Gordon: True, but we all know we would have loved to have seen Tiffany used in the later episodes for her...uh...assets.
Jason: Sure, you would :-)
Chico: And why not? I say, if you've got it.. Flaunt it.
Jason: Play to win.
Chico: ... and spare no one. But yeah, this is a nice show, a nice comeback for yet another reality franchise we were ready to put in the ground.
Jason: Lets see what happens during the season. I am happy so far. Shocked as hell mind you
Chico: Good. Because it's happy news time.
Gordon: True enough, and as we unleash our Doppler for the 17th season...uh...Chico.
Chico: Gordon, I.... what did you do?
Gordon: Its not what I did, it's what your protégé did.
Chico: I'll ask again... What did you do? =p
Gordon: We have 14 hamsters and 1 cat that energize up our news choppler. And now, we have an addition.
Chico: And that is because?
Gordon: Because Chairman the hamster fired all of the hamsters, because he was afraid that they would strike.
Chico: Oh.
Gordon: So he brought in...a scab pig. And the pig is now working the back of the Choppler.
Chico: Well, it's a good thing... because I'm actually paying off the final payment of the Mega Hyper Choppler 3000.... and it has a pig spot.
Jason: What's his name?
Gordon: His name is...Hans.
Chico: And here we go with Hans. Gordon... that's you.
Gordon: Roll that Beautiful Pot-Bellied Brain Footage
Jason: OINK!

(Doug: Live, local, and latebreaking... From the four corners of the globe to your frontal lobe, this is WLTI Brainvision News, and now here's Gordon Pepper, Chico Alexander, and the award-winning Brainvision News Team)

Chico: It's new-graphics-package, baby! Let's not waste any time. Let's fire up the machine. First up in the Business End..
Jason: (hands Chico the 2008 Black Bat)
Chico: Nice and shiny

Have you ever wondered what the top game show brands were in the world? Wonder no more, thanks to FremantleMedia. The firm named "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader" as the most successful format of 2007 based on its fast rollout (and less than a year out, too).

Gordon: Well deserved, too
Chico: I'd say so, yes. Not too far behind was "(Insert country here)'s Got Talent", which was Britain's top show of the last year.
Jason: Thank you, Paul Potts
Chico: And need I say... underrated. If you haven't heard of the guy... You don't know where you are right now.
Gordon: Where am I?
Chico: ... see? He has no idea. But he does have dates... and I guess that's important.
Gordon: I have a date book - and maybe I need a scorecard, but for right now, a date book will suffice
Jason: Dates are important--especially in the Strike season...Month 3
Gordon: Yes, and here's the next week of debuts -

Jan. 7 - Dance War, Jan. 8 - How Much is Enough?, Jan. 10 - Make me a Supermodel, and Jan. 13 - Rock of Love 2, Electric Boogaloo

Gordon: I know everyone can't wait to watch these babies.
Chico: ... I'll wait until I see them.
Jason: The only one is the GSN one.
Gordon: I'm guessing most of the audience will be watching these babies like the Predalien watched the human babies in the hospital ward - and ate them.
Jason: Chomp.
Chico: Nummy.
Gordon: How does it taste?
Jason: Just like Chicken
Gordon: Yummmm....How does chicken taste like in other lands?
Chico: Let's find out! Today, we're going commonwealth.
Jason: OK

BBC is working on a Canadian version of "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria?"

Chico: That show hit big in the UK... When it was tried in the US... not so much.
Gordon: Greased.
Jason: #6 on Gordon's worst list of 2007
Chico: Will it work in the great white north? Only time will tell.
Gordon: The musical is still playing here in the U.S....inexplicably, I may add.
Chico: It was offered as a prize on Wheel.
Jason: Yup.
Chico: Apparently we're dead set on putting this show on. Even if we hate it.]
Jason: Wheel did have another $300K Week, btw--with a 4/5 bonus round percentage.
Gordon: Spoeaking of Hate...ready for some nicely brewed 2008 Haterade?
Jason: (sniffs) A good vintage.
Chico: ... Tastes like gutter water, cow piss, and children's tears.
Gordon: Oh shoot. Not strong enough. Forgot the bile.
Jason: You didn't add the bile. Shame on you.
Chico: But first...

Are you smarter than...Kynt and Vyxsin from the Amazing Race. Some infallibly bad logic that cost them their stay in the show.

Gordon: Now let's say you are competing neck and neck with another team. You know you're in last place coming in. You see a U-Turn. Who are you going to U-Turn?
Jason: Said team usually.
Chico: The team you're competing against.
Gordon: You would think. Kynt and Vyxsin are going up with Jennifer and Nathan, who have already said that if they get to the U-Turn first, they are going to use it on Kynt and Vyxsin. They go to the U-Turn and decide to use it on....Don and Nick? Did I miss something here?
Chico: Only the fact that they were actually ahead. WAY ahead.
Gordon: Not only was Jennifer and Nathan behind at that point, they catch up and eventually surpass the goths, leading to their departure.
Jason: And combine it with the fact they forgot receipts in a Road Block.
Gordon: That certainly contributed, but they could have overcome that if they had a lot of time aheas of Jen and Nathan - which they would have should they have implemented the Road Block correctly. Now Kynt and Vyxsin's excuse was they thought that Jen and Nathan were ahead, but if you get to the U-Turn and see that it hasn't been used yet, you would have to think that it wasn't used because Jen and Nathan didn't get to it yet.
Jason: If they used the U-Turn. Jen and Nathan would have been toast. Period.
Chico: Because they were the only team who said that they would use it. As it happened, Kynt & Vyxsin were wrong, and now they're gone.
Gordon: Right.
Chico: So sad...
Gordon: And what makes it worse is that we are stuck with at least 2 more weeks of Jen and Nathan on our screen, since the next lap has to be a non-elimination lap. And now, time for Haterade.
Chico: Grr. Me no like. Bad medicine.
Gordon: And it's real bad medicine for...

Tila Tequila, who says that her choice of Bobby dumped her because things didn't work out. Only one problem here - Bobby says that Tila dumped him because he never HEARD from her since the end of the show. Oops. Oh, did I mention that all of a sudden, Tila signed another contract for Season 2 of A Shot of Love? You don't think that THAT had anything to do with it, do you?

Jason: Not a thing. Nope. The relationship took it's natural course. You believe me, right?
Gordon: Sure I believe you, Jay. By the way, I have been looking for a nice bridge to buy. you have any to sell me?
Jason: Oh Gordon...here's the deed to the Brooklyn Bridge!
Gordon: Wowee!! How much do you want for it?
Jason: $24.
Gordon: Would you accept some trinkets?
Jason: Hmmm....ok.
Gordon: Yay!
Chico: Heh.
Gordon: You know, we can hate all we want on Tiffany 'New York' Pollard, but at least I'll give her points for class and honesty when she turned down a season 3 of the show because she thought she found the right guy. She turned down a LOT of money.
Chico: That... and this is saying a LOT... is class.
Jason: Especially in this reality based world we live in.
Chico: Oh yeah. Speaking of tequila, who wants to get fully loaded?
Jason: Hic

This week, according to HitWise, the most popular TV website belongs to Deal or No Deal with a WHOPPING 34% of all hits. 34.60%.

Jason: Deal!
Chico: As a comparison, second was America's Most Wanted with 6.32%.
Jason: Ho. Lee. Cow.
Chico: Then Heroes, American Idol (which debuts next week, Gordon), Biggest Loser, Lost, the Office, One Tree Hill, Gossip Girl, and the Simpsons.
Gordon: (drools over American Idol 7)
Jason: BTW...I still say AI7 is going to suck. But we shall see.
Gordon: We shall see, indeed, but one think we'll get is a new cast of Media Hoes.
Chico: We'll get to that... first though... Hey, I found a casting paper in this couch.
Gordon: Well, in order to be a media ho, we have to cast them, and I have a nice red Casting Couch for it.
Jason: You scotchguarded it for 08!
Chico: Yeah, that's how I found the casting paper. It's under one of the cushions.

We start with another reminder for people who want to be on The Moment of Truth - sign up here -

http://www.realitywanted.com/index.php/latest/1944?PHPSESSID=0195878c960ae3f744292545205bde79

Gordon: Meanwhile we have a new trivia show going on.

Are you ready to take center stage to test your luck and your basic trivia skills? Casting Directors are seeking enthusiastic people who are looking to have a blast and a chance to win some cool cash. If you are full of personality, enjoy trivia, and are a big fan of game shows, then submit ASAP!

http://www.realitywanted.com/index.php/latest/1944?PHPSESSID=0195878c960ae3f744292545205bde79

Chico: The catch... you have to live in Southern CA.
Gordon: Next one...oh yes, stop me if you've heard this one before.

Do you have what it takes to compete with Copperfield? Be the next Blaine? Out conjure Criss Angel?

Chico: Please, stop.

We’re looking for America’s next great undiscovered magician. Stage, parlor, street, any and all styles and talents are welcome. 100 will be chosen to compete in the televised search for the next great magician.

Chico: Please, sto...ugh.

You must be 18 or over to participate. All submissions become the property of Studio City for its uninhibited use, which may include worldwide broadcast on-air and online.

http://www.realitywanted.com/index.php/latest/1981?PHPSESSID=0195878c960ae3f744292545205bde79

Chico: Here's one for you, G. An online talent show.
Gordon: Oh Joy, oh melodious rapture.

With $150,000 including a singing contract in the offing for the winner. The TOTAL POP STAR Celebrity Judges are Joey Lawrence, Deborah Gibson and Andrew Van Slee.

http://www.realitywanted.com/index.php/latest/1941

Chico: And heaven help me if people take Joey Lawrence seriously.
Jason: Good grief.
Gordon: I've got the scraper. Who's got the bottom of the barrel?
Chico: Right here. Hey look, some hoes!
Gordon: Weeee!
Chico: *plays "Pimpin' All Over the World"*

In this week's Hodometer, Des Lynam gets an OBE award, Ruben Studdard and Frenchie Davis will tour together, the Survivor: Micronesia Hoes are revealed...Ryan Seacrest is ready for love, Samantha Harris talks about her baby, and Oprah Winfrey unleashes 'Oprah's Big Give', and Brandy will NOT be criminally charged with the accident she was involved with.

Gordon: But none of them are your hoes of the week.
Jason: And the first ho of 2008 is?
Gordon: We have 15 hoes this week.
Chico: What?
Gordon: The 15 hoes of the week are the 15 who's names are starting to be announced as the kids of this year's Jeopardy Teen Tournament. Last year's tournament was arguably the best one ever, and it will be hard for them to live up to that, but I'm sure they will try. Good luck to all of you!
Jason: Do we have enough in the budget for 15 cups?
Chico: No, Block. Cups are out. 2008 is the year of the Media Ho Grill.
Gordon: Pimp Lunchboxes.
Jason: And it will be Alex's first taping back since his heart attack.
Chico: And we all welcome him back after such a quick recovery.
Gordon: And those...are your hoes.
Chico: *golf clap*. Okay, that's Brainvision. Shut it down. We'll have the super ultra relax... whatever next time.
Jason: Darn, this pig is hard to slow down
Gordon: Make sure Hans doesn't fall off the clif...I mean Choppler.
Chico: Meanwhile, we have You Love to Interrupt for the past two weeks. The question, what do you want under your Christmas tree...44% want ... models. The rest don't even come close.
Gordon: Will they all fit under the tree?
Chico: I hope so.
Jason: They looked pretty sweet on the christmas ep.
Chico: Oh yeah. This week, we're going back to Deal.

Chico: Results next week. When we come back... People say stuff... and we laugh. This is We Love to Interrupt... now with the new graphics hotness...

(Brainvision is brought to you by Cash Ambulance. This EMT will drive you to your hospital and ask you general knowledge questions along the way...but be careful, because in his rig, it's three strikes... and your insurance won't cover it.)

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