Peeling the flaps up of the Tree Mail reveal words, among them being "Pig", "Shell" and "Tiki". What the...?!

Well, let's find out as we head to Challenge Cove and meet with Uncle Jeff and the Mia-less Yasur Tribe. Yasur lies about how "together" the women are and Lopevi says the food situation is fine... but could be better. Well, that's what we're here for.

What we have here is a simple game of "Memory" with 15 pairs of items hidden under cone-shaped baskets. One member at a time, they'll look for matching pairs. First one to get five matching pairs wins the reward.

And the reward is... a man?! Uncle Jeff intros us to Cousin Dah of the Amber Tribe, native to the island. The reward is 24 hours of expert survival training by Dah. He'll teach them all the winning tribe needs to know about how to live better.

Chad starts off for us. His metal leg finds a wooden pig and a tamtam idol, which isn't a match (obviously). Lisa's next for Yasur and finds a shrimp trap and a coconut. Rory finds a tribal drum and a wooden idol, while Scout finds a gourd and a Nautilus shell. Bubba, who claims to be "great at this", finds a grapefruit... and a drum. Ut oh... that means, after some counseling with the tribe, Ami matches the drums and puts the tribe ahead one-nil.

Brady finds a palm frond... and a grapefruit. Oh no. Eliza is quick to pair up the fruit and make it two-nothing. This is NOT good. Chris finds a pig jaw and... a shrimp trap! We're just GIVING it to them, aren't we?! Julie matches THEM up to make it THREE-nil! Then JOHN finds ANOTHER pig jaw... but he uncovers another wooden pig instead of the other jaw. Leann finds both jaws to make it FOUR-nothing. A pissed Sarge stomps into the grass and finds both wooden pigs to FINALLY put Lopevi on the board!

But it might not be our day... because Twila find the other coconut. She hesitates, though, and finds a Nautilus shell instead. This COULD be a break for us. Chad goes back out and matches up coconuts to make it 4-2. Lisa then marches out, finds one shell... and STRUTS confidently to the other one to win the challenge... and win the services of one good man for the day!

AFTERNOON 8: DE DO DO DO, DE DAH DAH DAH

While Dah rushed the girls around all day showing them roots, nuts and sugar cane and helped with their shelter, and then all night getting crabs from him (from the OCEAN, you pervs), we went back to having our tails between our legs and stuck with fishing and plantains. The morale is ultra-low... especially with Bubba. It seems a week without the family is making him a little cuckoo because he writes his wife and kids' names on a staff. Rory tries to snap him out of it before Travis portrays weakness... but he's tired of Rory's and Sarge's bickering.

DAY 9: BLACK WATER

Rory has NEVER used a Hawaiian sling before... but, hell, he'll try ANYTHING once. So he walks out to the shore with the spear... and proceeds to walk around and around looking for fish in the shallow waters. This does NOT sit well with Brady and Sarge. Brady tries the stir the pot with Sarge, saying that Rory's practically got "immunity" tattooed on his forehead since NOBODY is going to VOTE for him.

IMMUNITY CHALLENGE:

Back to the Cove we go. Uncle Jeff has the Immunity Idol/Spear awaiting us as it's back to Tribal Immunity. The challenge is a tile puzzle which must be worked out.

There are 16 tiles, four each of four colors, one of four symbols on each one. The task is simple enough: arrange the tiles so that every row and column of four has a tile of a different color AND a different symbol. First to do that wins Immunity for the tribe. To help out, one tribe member will be perched about seven feet high and guide the others to putting the puzzle together.

We choose Rory as our "eyes" as Yasur picks Eliza. At the count of "GO", we start flipping the tiles around. Rory has a problem with Sarge moving tiles before all of them are turned and yells at him. He concentrates on the colors first... and the rest of the tribe WAIT for him to give orders before DOING anything. They get the colors worked out... so they work on getting the symbols right. This, however, is not as easy as it looks.

Then things break apart with us. Rory is SCREAMING orders but nobody seems to understand them. It doesn't get through the guys' heads to make sure the colors stay as they are while they're switching tiles. After a while, they stop listening to Rory altogether and try to work it out on their own. This gives Eliza the chance to rally HER tribe to working the colors out and start to work on THEIR symbols... PROPERLY, I might add. While each man tries to work it out on his own, the women listen to Eliza and, eventually, work the puzzle out and win Immunity from us... AGAIN!

AFTERNOON 9:

To say this was a "cluster f***" of a day would be an understatement.  Rory puts the blame on his own shoulders, basically because he couldn't organize the group better. As Rory walks by himself, the talk again turns to who gets booted. Bubba gets the same line from Brady that Sarge got; Rory's no good for the team and needs to go. Chris thinks that there's dissention in the ranks of their alliance, particularly with the "Type A-plus" personality of Sarge. Sarge thinks that Brady WOULD be a good person to keep around... and Rory's a "bad seed".

TRIBAL COUNCIL:

To the Stone Temple O' Doom we go to talk with Uncle Jeff. The first thing he talks about is Rory getting zero-point-nada respect during the Immunity Challenge...and Rory admits to being the leading vote-getter. Bubba senses that the momentum HAS shifted to the women but it'll be a "whole new ball game" come the NEXT challenge. Jeff ain't buying that. Brady thinks the men have played an individual from the very start and, because they weren't concentrating on advancing the tribe, THAT'S why they've been choking.

Chris says that they don't know if the women will actually play the numbers game against the men once the merge occurs... and Jeff asks him, "What on Earth makes you think they would do anything BUT stick together?!" Chad adds that the tribe MUST come first... but individuals MUST be a back-up. John is worried about being voted out since he's one of the stronger ones. Brady will vote to make sure the tribe doesn't lag behind.

With that, it's time to vote. Once more we head into the alcove to vote: first Chris, then Bubba, Rory ("Brady, you caught the first fish and you did climb the pole [for the Spirit Stone], but sometimes the spirits dictate that it's time to go."), John, Brady ("Maybe the third time's the charm" [voted for Rory for the third time]), Chad and Sarge.

Uncle Jeff comes back with the tub of votes and reads them off: Brady, Brady, Rory, Brady...and Brady. That ends the story of the man named Brady, who was unanimously found guilty of impersonating a tribe member. His sentence is a one-way ticket out of Vanuatu.

"Based on your first three Tribal Councils," Uncle Jeff ends the Council on, "you're voting off men who you think might be an individual threat." But he reminds us that it's still WAY early in the game. We grab our torches and leave Brady to wonder "how much does THAT suck?!"