Match 2:
Laak/Williamson/Kim/Wuhl/Rodriguez/Leifer - July 15
After Round 1,
we see that the Poker Pros took the Lion's Share of the
points. Can the comedians bounce back this week? Let's see
if they can, and who would be doing the bouncing...
Poker Pros
Phil Laak - The Unabomber won the first match. He
wants more. More!
Robert Williamson - He used to be the narrator for
Poker Royale. Now he's a contestant. At least they save on
the budget.
Connie Kim - This is her first time in the series,
and Connie has a few wins under her belt. Can she get more
money out of the funnies?
Comedians
Robert Wuhl - Well, at least he can't do any worse.
He got no points last time.
Paul Rodriguez - He could do worse than last time,
but being that he only took 2 points, he can't do much
worse.
Carol Leifer - This writer for Seinfeld is an
excellent card player. I don't expect her to do badly at
all.
Fact: According to Cosmo, women find that the sexiest part
of a man is their sense of humor. Sure they do. That's why
I'm single. Bah.
Hand 1 - Wuhl has a suited A/5 ?.
Kim has a suited A Q ?. Rodriguez has an off-suit K ? 7 ?.
The flop has a 4 ? K
? 3 ?. Rodriguez pairs his kings,
but Wuhl has a straight draw. He folds, Rodriguez bets and
Kim calls. The Flop is an 8 ? and Kim forces Rodriguez to
go all-in. Rodriguez calls and Kim, who realizes her
error, needs an Ace. She gets a J ?
instead and Rodriguez has a great start. Kim is quickly
the short stack.
Fact: After losing a card game, Connie Kim had to wash a
car in nothing but a wet t-shirt. She's currently losing
her shirt here, which would make her...naked. Whoo-hoo!
Hand 2 - The Unabomber has Red 9's and raises. Rodriguez
plays with a K ? 10 ?. The Flop
is 8 ? J ?
3 ? and that gives Rodriguez no help, Laak goes all-in and
Paul calls. The turn is a 9 ? and Laak gets trips. The
river is a K ? and Laak doubles
up right through Rodriguez, who is now the new short
stack.
Fact: Paul Rodriguez started his career as a doorman at
'The Comedy Store'. I'm wondering why he's not there right
now.
Hand 3 - Leifer raises an A/8 ?, while Wuhl calls with an
A ? 10 ?.
Rodriguez goes all-in with a K/Q D and Williamson calls
with a 8 ? 7 ?. The Flop is...3
? A ? 7
?, which pairs Wuhl's Aces. It's Leifer who bets though,
while Wuhl and Williamson just call. The Turn is a 10 ?,
and Wuhl now has 2 pair. Leifer bets some more, and Wuhl
and Williamson calls. The river is a 5 ?, and it's check
all around. Wuhl wins everything with the 2 pair, and that
also means that Rodriguez, which is part of that
everything, is gone. He gets no points, and only gets 2
points in the first 2 matches. Yick. He says that the
shirt (which is bright green) was too loud, and adds that
everyone can now talk English. 'Next..I'm going to not
show up...what about cheating? that's an option.'
Fact: Paul Rodriguez's son, P-Rod, has an X-Games Gold
Medal. P-Rod? Can I prod Paul not to enter any more card
tournaments?
We get a spotlight on Williamson. He was raised on Houston
and won his first WSOP bracelet in 2002. He has also lost
more than 200 pounds. 'I'm half the man I used to be'.
Fact: Casino gambling is legal in 38 out of the 50 states.
Hand 4 - Leifer raises with a...J ? 3 ??
She does, and Williamson ( 8 ? 7
?) and Kim (A ?
9 ?) calls. The Flop, with a 5 ?
3 ? 7 ?, helps no one, and Williamson, who is the short
stack thanks to Wuhl, goes all-in. Kim, who is the second
short stack, calls. The Turn is no help, as it's a 4
?, and the River (J
?) doesn't do much either.
Williamson doubles up and Kim is in peril.
Fact: Robert Williamson likes to collect goofy socks. His
favorite ones? Scooby Doo.
Hand 5 - Williamson goes all-in (A ?
Q ?) and hopes that no one has anything. The problem -
Wuhl has a real hand (J ? J ?).
We have a $46,000 pot riding on a flop, which is 9 ?, 3 ?
10 ?. The Turn is a...Q
? and Williamson now leads with
Queens. A 2 ? comes on the River,
and Williamson saves himself from elimination.
Fact: Before his comedy career, Robert Wuhl made
sandwiches in a deli. I bet he saw a lot of hams there.
We get to see Connie Kim, who is nicknamed 'The Happy
Assassin'. She has a lovely 18 year old daughter - which
is what she uses most of her winnings on. She says her
parents love what she does, because when she wins, they
get to benefit from it. Heh.
Fact: Robert Williamson enjoys spiking his beer with hot
sauce. That would really make Mary bloody.
Hand 6 - The blinds go up and Leifer calls with K
? Q ?. Wuhl calls with K/5
? while Williamson limps in with
a 10 ? 4 ?. The limp is a good
one - the Flop (9 ? 4
? 10 ?) gives Williamson 2 pair.
The Turn comes in and we see a J ?.
Unbeknownst to Williamson, that gives Leifer a straight
and Williamson is a huge underdog. He needs the board to
pair - and a 2 ? not only isn't
that, but it gives Leifer a flush. She bets it and
Williamson is forced to pay her off.
Fact: Comedians have raised over 56 million dollars in
charity money for Comedy Relief. I don't know if it's for
comic relief, but another fact is that Robert Wuhl wants
to be a baseball general manager someday.
Hand 7 - Williamson is back to the short stack. He goes
all-in with a Q/7 ?. Kim has 2
? 2 ?, but is the underdog when a
8 ? 5 ? 7 ? shows up and pairs
Williamson's 7's. The Turn (3 ?)
and River (4 ?) don't help Kim
and Williamson doubles up again. Williamson and Kim keep
switching the short stacks around.
Fact: Jerry Seinfeld earned a whopping $267 million in
1998.
Hand 8 - We have another 3-way (whoo-hoo!). Kim goes in
with a pair of 3's (?/?), Wuhl
has a 10 ? 2 ? and Leifer has a K
? 8 ?. They all limp in, and the
Flop (K ? 5 ?
8 ?) pairs Leifer's Kings, but
Wuhl and Leifer both have a flush draw. It's Kim that goes
all-in, though, which is a huge error in judgement. Wuhl
and Leifer both call as Kim ponders the errors of her
ways. The turn is an A ?, which helps no one. A K
? comes out and Leifer has the
best flush with a King high. Leifer puts in a small bet
and Wuhl calls. The 5th placed 'Happy Assassin' is not
happy and her chips have just been assassinated.
Fact: A good player in Texas Hold 'Em will fold their hand
on average 80% of the times. Kim should have followed the
statistics there.
We see Carol Leifer, who has written for Seinfeld and
Saturday Night Live, as was a judge on Star Search. She
got her start from Paul Reiser and it's said that the
character of Elaine was based on her.
Fact: Robert Wuhl has been married for 22 years. It must
be that deli meat smell that works as an aphrodisiac. Wuhl
has also won Emmy's for writing in 1991 and 1992.
Hand 9 - Leifer is the new chip leader, but Wuhl is
leading the hand with an A ? 4 ?. WIlliamson is forced to
call from the blind with a 4 ? 2
?. Williamson has been lucky, but
a 3 ? 3 ? J ?
is no luck. a 10 ? gives
Williamson a shot with a heart flush draw, but a 3
? ends that and eliminates
Williamson. He gets knocked out in 4th.
Fact: Phil Laak started playing poker at 7 years old and
used his winnings to buy candy.
Hand 10 - Laak goes all-in with K ?
9 ?, and Leifer calls with a A ? 8 ?.
The Flop is...Q ? 10
? 4 ?, which helps no one. Phil
needs a 9, J, or a King, and He gets it (K ?) on the turn.
The 7 ? comes on the River, and Laak double ups by way of
Leifer.
Fact: The average comic makes $50 an hour. Jim Carey made
$66 million last year.
Hand 11 - Wuhl has A ? Q
? and raises to $52,000. Leifer,
with a K ? Q ?, calls. The Flop -
a 7 ? 6 ?
5 p and Wuhl has the lead. The Turn is a 6 ? which pairs
the board. Both people check - but that won't happen again
as the A ? comes up on the river. Wuhl, with 2 pair,
forces Leifer to go all-in. A call from Leifer ends her
night and puts her to third. She calls, and her night is
over.
Hand 12 - Laak has collected more chips but has not taken
the chip lead. Laak has...Black Adders (A ? A ?). Wuhl
has...pocket Kings (K ? K ?).
Wow. Wuhl goes all-in and Laak calls. Laak calls it sick.
Wuhl calls it great. The flop (5 ? 5 ?
J ?) makes Wuhl sick, as he gets no help either there, the
turn (Q ?) or the River (3
?). Laak now has $576,000, while
Wuhl has a piddly $24,000.
Fact: Another term for pocket kings is 'King Kong'. Wuhl
probably feels like he fell off the Empire State Building.
Hand 13 - It's all over for Wuhl, so let's see the hand
that he gets knocked out on. He has a K ? 8 ?, while Laak
has a 5 ? 2 ?. The flop (J
? A ? 9 ?) and the turn (10
?) help no one, but the 5
?, which gives Laak the win, pops
out on the River and the match is over. For the second
straight week, Phil Laak wins the tournament and picks up
another $5,000.
In the overall standings, Robert Wuhl bailed himself out,
though he's miffed that he got knocked out with pocket
Kings for both tournaments. For everyone else, it's same
old, same old. Let's see who benefitted from the same and
who just felt old.
Comedians
**Robert Wuhl - 8
*Sue Murphy - 6
* Carol Leifer - 6
**Paul Rodriguez - 2
Mark Curry - 0
Tammy Pescatelli - 0
Pros
**Phil Laak - 20
*Kathy Kolberg - 8
*Robert WIlliamson - 4
*David Williams - 4
*Connie Kim - 2
Linda Johnson - 0
* = The Number of matches played
Next week - Curry and Pescatelli make their debut, while
Leifer is the returning veteran. They take on Johnson,
Williamson and Williams. We got a lot of Wills coming up.
Join us in 7 days to see who has the stronger Will.
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