the Archie Bunker of the Home
Last time, the Race began
from LA, shuffling to Ireland, where they hauled ass to the Pit Stop...
LITERALLY. But it was Ari & Staella who were a bit too slow to the
pitch, leaving them stranded at the Irish countryside. Ten teams remain
in the race to a million...
PIT STOP: Cannemara Heritage Centre, County Galway, Ireland
Deep within the vast emeral terrain of the Irish glen is this place, the
first pit stop for the 12th Race. The ten teams that DIDN'T finish last
have stopped here for 12 hours of food... and fellowship. And sleep.
Sleep's important too.
Engineering sibs Azaria & Hendekea were the first to arrive at high noon
local time will be the first to leave at midnight... also local time.
Fly 600 miles to Amsterdam, the
Netherlands. Upon landing, travel by train to Amsterdam
Central Station. Then find the Melkneisjesbrug Bridge, where
you'll find your next clue. You have $59 for this leg of the
complaining that Azaria is always pushing her. Meanwhile, Kynt
is confident that the locals will LOVE him and Vyxsin. The Dirty
Hippies just want to enjoy the race. Lorena & Jason... they're
"golden". Nicolas would never yell at his grandfather, but he
does have a thing about him going sloly. The Blondes see this as
a shock to the system.
And we have our first flat tire of the Race. It's Nic and Don.
and no one is helping them. Not even the blondes.
3a, and Nate & Jen are the final team to depart the Pit Stop.
Nic & Don are back on the road on a donut, but in sixth place.
At least the Shannon Airport will serve as "one of the great
equalizers" of the Race. Ticket counters open at 6a.
So far, we have one of two choices... layover at Dublin or head
to an inn and search the 'net for the quicker route. The Lesbian
Ministers and Team Whose Your Daddy? choose the latter.
6a rolls around, and everyone gets their tickets. There are only
twelve seats available from Dublin to Amsterdam. But the good
news is that everyone can get to Dublin.
And you know, no one shows any love to the ticket counter lady.
As a matter of fact, things get a bit nasty. Well, me being me,
I'm showing some love on the recap here. Much love to the ticket
ladies all over the world.
Marianna & Julia are last at the airport... and out of the 7a
flight to Dublin. And to drive the point home... there goes the
DUBLIN INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT
Now it's a race to the standby counter, where one of two flights
awaits. The early flight leaves 90 minutes before the later one.
Nicolas was a bit too pushy. Ronald, on the other hand, was very
professional. Christina tells Nic on that, telling him that you
can attract more flies with honey and all that. Especially if
the ticket lady thinks you're rude. Ow...
DEFINITELY on the early flight: Dublin to Amsterdam
Kynt & Vyxsin
Nathan & Jennifer
TK & Rachel
Lorena & Jason
Shana & Jennifer
Azaria & Hendekea
With two seats available on said flight, the tickets go to....
Donald & Nicolas.
I suppose anything to get these ugly Americans outta here.
Marianna & Julia manage somehow to catch up to Pat & Kate. Now
it's a foot race to the counter...
DEFINITELY on the later flight: Dublin to Amsterdam
Ronald & Christina
Kate & Pat
Marianna & Julia
AMSTERDAM INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT: Amsterdam, The Netherlands
Now it's a race to the train. Azaria & Hendekea are the only
team on the first train. They make their way to the bridge and
the familiar yellow-and-red route marker.
HOIST IT OR HUNT IT?
Hoist it: teams use a rope-and-pulley to hoist five pieces
of furniture up to a typical Dutch residence. Once the
furniture is inside, the foreman will hand the team their
next clue. The task requires brains and brawn, but the
buildings are only a few feet away.
Hunt it: teams make their way on foot to a bike lot where
they have to find two tagged bicycles. Then they must ride
said bikes five miles to an attendant who will be waiting
with the next clue. The task is not terribly physical, but
between looking for the bike and pedaling five miles, it
could take a while.
Azaria doesn't feel
comfortable with the pulley, so he bikes. Lorena & Jason and the
Dating Goths go hoist. TV first for Lorena. Baby carriage first
Azaria is still looking for a bike.
The next two teams look to hoist. Nic & Don hunt. Lorena & Jason
are the first to complete the task, and here's the foreman with
the good news...
From Buikslotermeerplein, travel by bus
to the fural village of Ransdorp. Once there, search the
marked field for your next clue.
Azaria & Hendekea
find their FIRST bike. And Gramps. Meanwhile, Vyxsin looks funny
hoisting a TV. Time for a switch out.
Lorena & Jason miss their bus to Ransdorp, #30.
TK & Rachel still have yet to hoist up a TV. Kynt & Vyxsin have
Meanwhile, Azaria & Hendekea pedal on outta there. Nathan & Jen
argue about knots and end up switching positions. The Blondes
finish and beg for a chiropractor. Nathan & Jen finish the task
and look for bus #30. They end up at a bus stop... with the
other three teams that finished. Meanwhile, Kynt & Vyxsin find
the bus... as it pulls into the bus stop.
Nic & Donald find the bikes... Azaria & Hendekea find the bus
(after finding the clue).
Meanwhile, the later flight finallly arrives as TK & Rachel
still struggle to hoist their first item. Switch out. Rachel
hoists her first item, a TV. And the second. And the third! And
the fourth! And the fifth! Now find the bus...
Back with the teams that DID manage to catch the bus...
WHICH ONE OF YOU IS THE ACROBAT?
Teams must complete a ditch vault over a 12-foot wide canal
of muddy water, touching both feet on the marsh at the other
side. A successful vault wins the next clue and the right to
retrieve the next clue in any... muddy... way they like.
Nathan & Jennifer
are first. Shana & Jennifer are next. Lorena & Jason are first
over the mud, though.
Ride a bakfiet (Dutch cargo bike) to a marked drop-off point
at Durgerdam Yacht Club, the PIT STOP for this leg of the
WARNING! The last team to check
in MAY be eliminated!
Blonde Jennifer is
first ... in the mud. Nathan's Jennifer is ... well, she's not
exactly doing so hot either. But blonde Jennifer gets the job
Nic & Donald gets on the bus. Ronald & Christina are about to
kill each other over the Detour. He decides a) that speaking
Italian in Holland when you're Chinese is cool, and b) that he
doesn't know enough about knots to go for the hoist.
PIT STOP: Durgerdam Yacht Club; Ransdorf, the Netherlands
There's the drop-off... There's Lorena & Jason.... and there's
Phil with two stereotypically Dutch children. "Welcome to
Lorena & Jason ... are TEAM #1! And as such, they've won a
three-wheeled sport-bike. Each.
Pat & Kate are still looking for bikes as Ron & Christina show
Second to the mat are Nate & Jen. Third, Shana & Jennifer.
Kate & Pat finally find four wheels, and laughing at Ronald &
Christina. They finally find their bikes. ... just as Kate & Pat
lose theirs. Karma much? Meanwhile, Ronald states that "he's
going to be optimistic with real truth flavor." Translation: I'm
going to be an ass, and you have to deal. I don't give a damn if
you're my kid.
Second bus to Ransdorf arrives with Azaria/Hendekea, Kynt/Vyxsin,
"Watch Pinky do it." Pinky... can't do it...
Ronald & Christina argue about "vascillating"... While standing
still. If you're going to argue, can you at least walk? This is
a race. He says that he's going to change... We'll see if he
By now, the only teams that haven't caught the bus were Pat &
TK/Rachel are fourth over the bog, and the Goths are fifth.
Meanwhile, the married ministers take a dirty back way to
Ransdorf... a van. I think that's a violation of the rules, but
I also think that it doesn't matter at this point.
Back at the bakfiet races...
Now to the canal, where Donald reveals to the world... Briefs.
Actually, they're more like man-panties, or... "man-ties."
Fourth to the mat... the Goths.
Fifth and sixth... Engineers and Dirty Hippies.
Meanwhile, Donald finally gets over the mudbog and puts his
clothes back on. Marianna, on the other hand, only takes one
shot. And doesn't even get dirty. Of course it helps that she
was a track star, and her event of choice was the pole vault.
They're #7 at the mat. Nic & Don are #8, and Phil notifies them
that there've been "complaints from the locals about getting
down to his underpants."
Christina is trying to get over the canal... and surprise
surprise, Ronald's not helping. At the bakfiet, Ronald makes a
comment about Christina having to lose some weight. Five seconds
later... boom. On your butts. They're still #9 to the mat,
though, as Ronald admits to being, well... a hardass.
Pat & Kate get their clue from the ditch vault, but
unfortunately, they're the last team to arrive. "I'm sorry tell
you that you've been eliminated from the race." They proved to
each other that they were meant to be together... but this is as
far as they'll go together in the Race.
After Leg 2: Ireland - The Netherlands.
1) Lorena & Jason: sportbikes
2) Nathan & Jennifer
3) Shana & Jennifer
4) Kynt & Vyxsin
5) Azaria & Hendekea: trip to Canada
6) TK & Rachel
7) Marianna & Julia
8) Nicolas & Donald
9) Ronald & Christina
ELIMINATED) Pat & Kate