August 22, 2006
"Game Show Man" Joe Van
Ginkel: TODAY! America's Got Talent has found its winner. Who cares?
PLUS...The World Series of Poker has found a new champion, GSN has a new
programming head, and Dancing with the Stars has new dancers... All this and
more, today...on Game Show Man's Sparring Partners!
(From VBS Cybervision
City, this is the game show webchat debate show that'll knock you out...this is
Game Show Man's Sparring Partners. Now, here's the Game Show Man
himself, Joe Van Ginkel.)
Joe V.G.: Hello,
friends, and welcome to our show. Let's meet our four combatants today. First,
the Sage of Studio 33, Travis Schario.
Travis Schario: *Camped out in front of CBS Television City* Is two days
too early to show up for work?
Joe V.G.: Very possibly. Next the Prince of Press Your Luck,
Jason Hernandez: *PYL running in the background* Hey guys! Hopefully, I
won't hit any whammies today. =)
Joe V.G.: lol Next, Mr. Nintendo, Rob Siedelman.
Rob Seidelman: And I still contend that Startropics is one of the most
underrated games of all time.
Joe V.G.: And finally, GSNN irregular Joe Mello.
Joe Mello: This game is made of Love and Peace! *V* I represent the
Johnny Yong Bosch faction, just because he's awesome and a former Power Ranger
Travis: Oh, no. Here we go.
Joe V.G.: And I represent...you know. :D Onward. We play eight
rounds, the first six with three questions, and the last two with only two. For
each question, I'll pick two people to debate their answers. Remember,
I'm not necessarily looking for opposing viewpoints, I'm looking for the
stronger argument. You'll go until you hear this sound...
At that point, I'll score
the argument. Ten points for the winner, nine or less for the loser, depending
on how strong or weak the argument was. At the end of the fourth and
sixth rounds, there will be knockouts; eliminations of the low scorer, who will
then transfer to the judge's desk for the rest of the show.
defending, so everyone watch out.
Joe V.G.: Indeed. Travis was our winner on the last show. Are we ready
to get under way?
Jason: Let's go.
Rob: I'm ready and willing.
Joe M.: Hit me with it
Joe V.G.: Then onto Round One!
Farmer's Market donut in my mouth*...let's rock.
Joe V.G.: Save me some Travis. First up...America's Got Talent.
Preteen singer Bianca Ryan proved she had talent this week as she took home
the big million dollar grand prize. For Joe and Travis...
Travis: Boo yah
Joe M.: :3
Are Bianca's 15 minutes
of fame up?
Joe V.G.: Joe?
Joe M.: I'd say not for another couple weeks. She still has photo-ops
and appearances on talkies to do. And since she's from the Philly area,
the city will always adore her because she actually won something
Joe V.G.: I see. Travis?
Travis: She'll have the stigma of being a trivia answer..."Who won the
first America's Got Talent?" So, in that respect, her fame will
last. Apart from that, I'd say she still has growing to do before she becomes
Joe V.G.: But you don't think she'll be able to make anything out of it.
Travis: I'd say she's at 14:22. She will, but not immediately.
Joe V.G.: CLANG! Travis wins this one. Personally, I think she's
at 14:59 myself.
Travis 10 - Joe 9
Next, for Rob and Jason...
Joe M.: Meh
Will any of the other
acts make a career out this show?
Joe V.G.: Rob?
Rob: Sadly, the freakish angel looking guy known as Leonid the Magnificent
will get some recognition from this show.
Joe V.G.: This is the one who broke down in front of the judges in
Rob: That would be the one. They will remember him for hula-hooping about
20-30 hula-hoops. Not only that, the image of him using a hula hoop with
his butt will get him on the talk shows and other assorted craptacular shows.
He'll have the same recognition as William Hung.
Jason: En, oh. It's very difficult to make a career out of a summer show
that is just a bunch of crappy filler time. Plus, some of the people on that
show have been on other shows before, or have made other appearances at arenas.
There have been at least three or four acts that have appeared elsewhere BEFORE
this show was even a glint in its father's eye.
Joe V.G.: CLANG! Rob wins for making fun of Leonid. :D
Rob 10 - Jason 9
And finally for Jason and
Do we really need to see
this show again?
Jason: H-E... double hockey-sticks NO!!! We really do not.
Most of the talent on this show can do fine looking for work elsewhere. Do we
really need to see all those hula hoops?
Joe V.G.: Heh. Joe?
Joe M.: Between the 5 of us, probably not. For the rest of those people in
TV land, they need their "Idol fix" during the summer, and this is the closest
they have. NBC would definitely love to see this in the summer
Jason: I'm sure they would, but who stays home and watches television
during the summer?
Joe V.G.: Enough to make a difference apparently.
Jason: Pssh.... please. Crappy shows like those are why I have a life.
Joe V.G.: CLANG! We probably don't need to see this show again, but lots
of folks seem to like it. Joe wins.
Joe M.: :D
Joe 10 - Jason 9
Jason: Well, those
folks are stupid.
Joe V.G.: Sadly enough, Jason is right.
Joe M.: Some people have to work in the summer, you know
Jason: What are you trying to say, Joe?
Joe M.: Not everyone goes on vacation.
Joe V.G.: At the end of one...
Joe 19 - Jason 18 - Rob 10 -
Joe M.: Well this
lead won't last long.
Jason: No, it won't.
Joe V.G.: Okay, okay, okay. Enough. On to Round Two.
Jason: *cracks knuckles*
Joe V.G.: Dancing With the Stars! The show's third pool of
contestants has been announced, ranging from the likes of Mario Lopez and Viveca
A. Fox to Jerry Springer and James Carville. For Rob and Travis...
Who ya got?
Joe V.G.: Rob?
Rob: As is reported on pinnaclesports.com, Mario Lopez from Saved by the
Bell and Pet Star is favored. And seeing him on stage and in
Saved by the Bell, he does have some good moves and can dance well, as is
evident by his performance on Extreme Dodgeball 3.
Joe V.G.: The fool who cheated on Ali Landry. Shmoe. Is that who
you think's gonna win Rob?
Rob: Yup, I'm going with Mario.
Joe V.G.: Okay. Travis?
Travis: Mario Lopez as the favorite, based on personal opinion and the
GSNN article. Jerry and James as the "OK-I'll-see-what-they-do-to-themselves"
favorites, but early eliminations. Vivica as a Dark Horse.
Joe V.G.: O_o
Joe M.: errrr
Travis: *slaps entire panel*
Joe V.G.: CLANG! Interesting choice of words, Travis.
Joe M.: I'm personally going with some other channel XD
Joe V.G.: Rob wins this one.
Rob 10 - Travis 9
Joe V.G.: Although if
I may say so, Viveca's one Dark Horse I wouldn't mind riding. :P
Joe M.: !SMACK!
Travis: *calls Amy Jo Johnson*
Jason: Awww, Joey!
Rob: So much innuendo in this show.
Travis: Quadruple entendres. That's what we do.
Joe M.: come again?
Joe V.G.: ROFLMAO This one's for Jason and Travis...
Who would you have like
to have seen on this show?
Travis: Two words...Bob Barker
Jason: Are you kidding me?
Travis: Bad foot tendon or no, The Silver Fox to the ball room.
Jason: As a big fan of the show, I'd rather see some nice fluid dancing.
Joe V.G.: OH SNAP
Travis: Who's to say Bob can't dance fluidly?
Joe V.G.: Jason is apparently. Who would you want to see Jason?
Jason: I had more of a blast watching Mister Lachey put on some of the
best dance moves of the entire series than anyone else. Personally, how about
someone like Kaley Cuoco? Or maybe another female athlete with sex appeal, but
fantastic dancing ability.
Travis: AH...stop the game.
Joe V.G.: What?
Travis: "Fantastic Dancing Ability." That's not what DWTS is all
about. They have to get AMATEUR dancer celebrities. Jerry Rice, anyone?
Joe V.G.: CLANG! Travis is right. They need amateurs so they can
show them screwing up.
Travis 10 - Jason 9
Jason: Give me the
shows later in the season.
Joe V.G.: Finally for Rob and Joe: Part of the show's success is based on
the skills of its host, Tom "H2" Bergeron.
Jason: Oh, THEY get the easy one. :-p
Joe V.G.: What's easy about this...?
Jason: I know what's coming up. But I'll shut up before I get
Do you think Tom B. would
make a good contestant on this show?
Joe V.G.: Rob?
Rob: Yes, he would make a good contestant on the show. Plus, many people
who watch these kind of shows would love to see the host actually participated
in the show.
Joe V.G.: Interesting. Joe?
Joe M.: Would he make a good contestant, yes. He's charming, witty,
affable, and seemingly open to change and challenges. Would he actually make it
far into the show, that's to be determined.
Travis: Tom Bergeron as contestant, John O'Hurley as replacement host
until Tom loses.
Joe V.G.: That might work.
Jason: Nobody wins this one, IMHO. Guys, you forget that he actually
DID dance in season 2.
Joe V.G.: CLANG! This one's a draw. BTW, in case you didn't
know...TOM BERGERON RULES.
Joe M.: Did I mention that I don't watch this show? :P
Travis: Same here.
Rob 10 - Joe 10
Rob: I catch it sparingly.
Jason: Oh, hell no.
Travis: Draws mean 10's
Joe M.: That's how boxing works, J
Jason: They should both get penalized a point.
Rob: Settle down, Jason.
Travis: Calm down...have some dip.
Joe V.G.: At the end of two...
Rob 30 - Joe 29 - Travis 29
- Jason 27
Break time on Sparring
Partners. Back after this. Sorry Amy Jo! I couldn't help myself. If only
you were here... :P
Joe M.: Go, Johnny Yong Bosch, Go!
Jason: Bad Joey Numbers.
Jason: *tsk tsk*
Rob: I was watching wrestling or playing outside and getting exercise.
(Brought to you by
Viveca's Dark Horse Ale. Smooth, crisp and clean on the way down.)